queen of all lorax memes

my blog is 60% shitposts, 30% johndave, and 10% johndave shitposts.

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

why do i get so many more followers when i’m inactive

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

what i need this 4/13 is a snap of john and dave kissing. god bless

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

happy 4/13 bois, this is my third Official 4/13 and almost my fourth year as a grubby homestuck. i know i will never escape johndave. mwah

[homestuckasthesquad]

[peachykazuichi-deactivated20180]

John x Dave or Dave x Karkat?

i have johndave5lyfe tattooed on my ass cheek. 

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

looks like we have matching tattoos

[peachykazuichi-deactivated20180]

looks like i've used one idea that correlated to one of your fics but have been used in several movies and therefore i am now a criminal, my plagiarism wasn't hidden right, i'm sorry i have failed you

lmao. we’re good fam. 

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

hey do all of you assfucks hear that??? WE ARE FINE. I DIDNT COPY ANYONE. JESUS CHRIST.

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

IT WAS NOT PLAGIARISED

i did not fucking plagiarise @luciferslittlekitten/olivia's fanfic. the premise was similar, but the premise she and i used have BOTH been used in other media before. the writing and storyline were ultimately different, especially as the story progressed. but because a bunch of fucking people threw tantrums for no good fucking reason, i deleted the fic. please leave me the fuck alone and stop telling me i plagiarised someone. i have enough shit going on already without you enormous fucking shitstains getting on my case for something i didn't even fucking do. olivia is even more popular than me with better writing, and she's one of my good friends, so why would i fucking steal her ideas? i love writing and have been doing it for years BECAUSE i love it, not because i want fame. i give 0 shits about being popular. so please, please, PLEASE, leave me the fuck alone. i'm sorry this came off so rude, but i am literally fucking finished with this bullshit.

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

hey i saw ur fic on ao3 and it looks a lot like you plagiarized from @luciferslittlekitten ://////

OH MY FUCKING GOD IT WASNT. i had published the exact same fucking fic at the same time she published hers but i deleted it so i could restart it. it had a similar premise but the writing was different, especially as the chapters progressed. but people like you have fucking ruined it, so it's deleted now. fuck off.

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

[rises from the flames of johndave] I LIVE

[fuckyeahgravityfalls]

1-888-274-4447

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

literally incredible

[peachykazuichi-deactivated20180]

im calling you out olivia i cant live this lie anymore u dont even like watsky

or DO i

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

this is irrelevant but i like watsky

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

who the fuck is this nerd in her red and blue johndave lookin fucking shirt?

the diamond necklace i’m wearing never leaves me. it’s from my moirail, he has a matching one. i love him.

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

are you the one who wrote that fic that was pretty much like "john's an orphan now and everything is terrible"?? because i have rly vague memories that you wrote something like that but i can't find the actual fic so i might be wrong

it could’ve been me, i’ve written so many fics about john that it hurts

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

i have 420 followers it’s time to blaze

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

now i have 421 followers which is my birthday

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

best shoplifting method !!!

1. locate the item you want

2. put it in your cart or basket

3. take it to the counter

4. have the minimum wage cashier who is tired of shitheads like you shoplifting ring you up

5. pay for the item! with money! that you should’ve earned from a fucking job, instead of stealing things like an entitled brat

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

i have 420 followers it’s time to blaze

[milkstoasted]

YO HOLY SHIT SPRINT IS RUTHLESS WHEN IT COMES TO VERIZON

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

there can only be one alpha carrier

[milkstoasted]

Well sprint is a lil bitch and verizon is better

[dramasticallyprocrasturbating]

i have t-mobile so i can’t help here (i actually had verizon but they started fucking me over so i got t-mobile)