Story time from someone who's nearly thirty years deep into fandom (literally, my twenty-eighth anniversary as a fic writer is in nine days)!
The last few times I've used a beta reader that wasn't my old regular beta @renniejoy (who I don't think betas anymore) or @dreaminonao3 (for quick SPAG betaing/betaing for fandoms we're both familiar with for characterization purposes), the betas I have come across since around 2018 have basically heavily tried to rewrite my fics in a way that they no longer sound like mine. It's basically been someone going "I don't like this, I would write it this way" without explaining the hows and whys behind their reasoning, and then stripping my writing of what makes it my writing. This is not me having a thin skin about it, as in one case it was a fandom I had lost familiarity with that I was creating a fic for as part of a reverse bang, and the artist I was working with offered to give it a read-through. And those corrections made my fic better! I welcomed the changes in terminology and character interaction that the artist suggested in their betaing because they had an artistic vision and I was trying to bring it to life in words, so their input was beneficial to both of us getting the idea of what the art was trying to convey across. But that was because they explained the reasons behind the changes in a way that made me appreciate them.
But I also had an experience that swore me off of writing gender swap fics for a very long time because, the first time I wrote it, I got a beta who essentially rewrote my fic. And I, at the time, was thinking "Oh, I guess this is just the way gender swap is supposed to be?" and went with it. And I ended up hating the revisions so much I orphaned the fic (it was for an exchange, otherwise I probably would have just deleted it because, in the end, it was no longer my fic and it was really my beta's fic). So now, I don't generally use betas. Will I in the future? Possibly. Do I feel I need to with my random drabbles and one-shots I'm currently writing? Nope. I've got enough years and training as a writer that I'm firm enough in how I want my work to sound that I don't feel I need to. And this is unfortunate, because in my nearly twenty-eight years of fanfic writing I've had great betas for the most part! People who liked my writing and wanted to see my story be the best version of my story, not what they specifically wanted regardless of what I wrote and whether they were even the intended audience. I know there are still good betas out there, but they're fewer and farther between these days, unfortunately.
I guess Nonny basically stating that betas are the better way to go, that everyone knows a good beta from a bad one, and specifically the statement "I don't think anyone really wants a 'beta', they want assurance" irritates me as someone who, well, is older than them because it's not always the case, and unfortunately, most of the people I've come across who are offering beta services in the last ten or so years don't know better than the writers in some cases. A beta is somewhat of a different beast than an editor, and that seems to be conflated at some points. Editors know the rules and know how to break them in a way that will make a story better because they have the educational background for it and have been trained for the position, but not all betas are at an editors level. Betas hold a volunteer position in fandom, and that's something we need to remember. The best betas I ever had were not necessarily English majors (though admittedly many were, or were in an adjacent major like drama) but they had a grasp of how to write well, and what made a good story, skills that are not necessarily being learned by the more recent generations.
And not all betas have the same strong suit. That's something newer members of fandom need to learn, that not every beta is going to be able to do everything you need for a fic. That's why we have different types of betas who help with different things! If you have a beta who says "Oh, I can beta anything!" and you need British grammar SPAG and Britpicking and they don't do that, then the experience will be unpleasant and the fic will suffer, and it may discourage the beta or the author from offering/using services again like that in the future.
This is also not counting the ageism in fandom that is trying to push the fandom olds who have the skills that would help the newer generation out in spades at astounding rates. The betas I'd encountered when I was first starting to find my voice as a writer were older than me, taking time out of busy lives to go over my stuff and give me both constructive criticism but also letting me know what worked. They weren't all college educated, but they had experience with storytelling in some way, and that made their insight valuable. I don't know where I would be without my fandom elders. I don't want to know where fandom would go if (or maybe even when) the crop of fandom elders like me get pushed out.
In regards to "not having a thick skin": considering how many people shit on writers, old and new, in AO3 comments and Discord servers and Reddit communities and even here on Tumblr? Maybe I'd be liking a little more assurance these days instead of hate, too. Not to sound like any more of a fandom old than I already do, but back in the day people were allowed the leeway to experiment more, to find their style (sometimes with a betas help, sometimes with gentle feedback, sometimes with a "I see your vision, can I offer some advice?" private messages) and I think that's why fandom, while not as mainstream back in the 90s/00s/10s, flourished. Don't get me wrong, there's always been hate, but it hasn't been so...malevolent feeling, I suppose.
You wonder why young authors give up and don't ask for outside help? It's because so-called constructive criticism from people (including betas) has turned into more "This is everything I find wrong with the story" type comments these days. The constructive part seems to be missing, even from betas. When I engage a beta, I want to also know what I got right as opposed to just everything I did wrong. And the betas I have run across in the last tennish years, as well as fic commenters, are not doing that. There's less building our fandom members up these days and more tearing each other down. Even after having written thousands of fic and me having a thicker skin than some of the new people still trying to find their way, I find some of the comments I get absolutely horrendous and just plain out rude, and this change in attitude is appalling, especially when it's from someone you asked for help from.
Folks, times, they are a'changing, especially from the late 90s when I got my start, and even from the late 10s/early20s before the pandemic hit and fandom seemed to have changed almost overnight. Maybe these newbies need a beta, maybe they don't, but if they're chased away before they find who they are as a writer or artist regardless? Then that's a damn shame.
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