bee !!

yr fave shoegaze girl // 28 // "she" and/or "her"

[joyceanfartboner-deactivated202]

i fucking roll into the fucking weed barons house and his name is tayn’t and he fucking got a neck tattoo of a vagina and a gun and hes fucking like got a claws afixed to his finger and hes like “yo jfb youre my dog i just killed a guy want some pot” and im like ofc dog but while he isnt looking i grab fucking six thousand dollars and stuff thirty ounces of weeds in my jncos and he like lights up a blunt wrapped in gold for me and he tells me he wants to give me his ps4 and i say thank you but do you have any games for it and he says oh yeah heres bloodborne and dark souls 3 and i say thinanks

[dromendus]

LegalEagle second channel called LethalEagle where he uses his legal expertise to find ways to lawfully kill people and post footage of it online

[dromendus]

let's get the facts straight. donkey kong cannot "lay pipe" because he does not have traditional genitalia. it was confirmed in nintendo power issue #732 that he has a cloaca. fuck you

[dromendus]

lol i dare you to kill me. i triple dog dare you to pin me to the ground and strangle me to death, staring tearfully into my eyes, watching as the light leaves them. to break down sobbing at the act you have committed, knowing that it had to be done, yet still feeling the weight of having just snuffed out the life of the one you loved so much. then my ghost comes out and you gotta kick her ass too. i fucking quadruple dog dare you lmao

[dromendus]

[really annoying guy] don't invite me to your party if there ain't gonna be hoes there

[guy who's into gardening] don't invite me to your party if there ain't gonna be hoes there

[guy who really likes tubes] don't invite me to your party if there ain't gonna be hose there

[guy who's being gangstalked] don't invite me to your party if there ain't gonna be *hears noise, looks around* who's there?

[the grinch] don't invite me to your party if there are gonna be Whos there

[dromendus]

do you live on dixie highway? cos you're the only dick i see. highway

[dromendus]

"tastes like a wet horse" i say to the donut shop owner, after tasting the new Wet Horse Donut

[wifehaver103947]

what im thinking about at any given moment

[wifehaver103947]

[wifehaver103947]

[charl0ttan]

im really really so so happy to be a cute transgender girl. ill never exhaust it. ill never exhaust it

[dromendus]

i have eaten a minimum of 35 human corpses this year. my dick is incapable of being sucked. i drive a sedan with one of those mini uhaul trailers attached at all times because trucks and cargo vans are for hicks and pedophiles. my favorite band is smashing pumpkins but i only like their 2010s stuff

[oneheadtoanother]

are you lost little boy

[oneheadtoanother]

This is so much funnier than my caption, dammit

[dromendus]

making a protein bar called "oops! all prions!" that has 25g of prions in it

[victoryrifle]

FALLOUT NEW VEGAS [2/?]

[charl0ttan]

guy who smokes weed with a knife and fork

cutting an eighth of weed and seasoning it and pouring olive oil over it and then throwing it on a pan

[dromendus]

[to the tune of ymca]

it's fun to shit in the

T O L T

[dromendus]

[me talking to a stranded visibly upset two year old child at walgreens]

sup little man i'm doing bologna tricks. heh. you'll understand when you're—whoa mama look at that sexy broad!

[the "sexy broad" (the child's mother) hears me clearly as i'm only ten feet away and being really loud]

oh man i gotta get outta here!!!!

[i sprint towards the store entrance too quickly for the automatic door to anticipate my approach and slam directly into the glass, shattering it]

ah fuck man i got glass in my eyes i can't see shit!! those bologna tricks ain't worth nothin' man this fucking suuuuuuucks!!!!

[a police officer who happened to be walking by witnesses this moment and fatally blasts my dome asunder with their service weapon (the cop is non-binary)]

[dromendus]

going to the bar and spiking somebody's drink with a single drop of my blood. i am permanent