null. @dzebulon-blog - Tumblr Blog

1 more shot then I’m quitting forever!

Cross my heart, cross my fingers.

ooc post after like 12 years

Soooo I’ve been getting into a lot of shit while I was gone. Stuff like: being a sugar baby, online dating outside of that, quitting my job, thinking I had depression (it was work related trauma) and trying to figure out this weight stall.

I really miss you guys! I want to come back but I feel as if I’ve been gone for soooo long and I’m not sure if I should attempt to continue the threads I had going or If I should ask for new ones?

I need help?

didney-worl-no-uta

cicadachild-deactivated20191130

my stomach hurts

captainamerica-inmiddleearth

Ive passed this video so many times and this time I finally watched it. Im really glad I did

warpedchyld

I have stared into the abyss and it gave me a thumbs up

startrekrenegades

[Person behind camera: (sobbing incoherently with laughter) it’s so…. ffffunnny…. ohheheheheh…. (sniffing, snorting, laughing) of all the shit you can find…. So this, this dates back to 19– (sniff) 1999, as you can see up there. (sniffs, laughs) “The Life Sized Satanic Doll Serves as Masturbation Toy for America’s Youth” This is, like, a Baptist website – (cracks up, giggles, snorts) ssfsfsfsfsfssss–stupidest thing… ever seen. So! (sniffs, calms down a little) So, w-what kind of doll was this child … masturbating to? (person scrolls down to picture of Jar Jar Binks, BURSTS INTO UNCONTROLLABLE WHEEZING LAUGHTER, SNORTS, WEEPS WITH LAUGHTER) Aah……oh my god…. aAHAHAHAHAHa….. HAHAHAHAHA….ohmygod…..]

mirab3lle

It’s times like this I’m grateful for the people that caption videos.

nickyhemmickk

@hughjackass

the-darkest-of-souls

@bennygal16

Bahahah this loki is hilarious like it really made my day

srsfunny

ahighlyfunctioningfangirl

God is trying to apologize

elionking-deactivated20191020

“Oh shit, my bad bruh”

clarknokent

He must’ve went to hell for that 14 minutes

awwcoffee-no

“It’s a functioning team. We disagree a lot. Fights occur but so do some solid laughs. They’re like the friends you have in school, but wouldn’t even say hi to in public.” The hawk stated, trying to make more sense of it to the younger. He could see some gears turning in the eyes before him, but instead of interrupting the though he moved to turn his back, kneeling over to his bag that he had dropped once safe. Inside were simple items, water, a change of shirt because this happened more than not. Despite how many times he was shot though, it didn’t stop the rising pain that he could feel slip through his body and smack right into his brain. Barton let his eyes slide shut for a moment, jaw clenching.

“It won’t be pretty later, I promise that and good. All Clint’s turn out unaturally handsome and shockingly charming. Not that you should be thinking about kids at your age. 19? too young bro. Anyway, you’re setting your child up for success.” He grunted out before pulling the black shirt over his shoulders in order to change into a more fresh one, not covered in soot and blood. “Sorry to be a disappointment, but no I am not a hitman for hire, just a bro trying to do something right.”

dzebulon-blog

Dennis could hardly pay attention to what was said though, all his attention was on the very interesting gunshot wound. “I’m nooo doctor but shouldn’t you like stop the bleeding?” Could he poke it? Would it hurt more if he did? It would be rude. “H- does it hurt. Alot?” Of course it did but it would make him feel better if the guy says ‘no.’

“Are you going to bleed to death, because if you’re going to die just like, kill me first because I’d rather you than them. I’m not going to make it out if you’re not. There’s the smallest chance I’ll settle down. I don’t really have a bedside manner and I’ll probably be murdered in my sleep. So don’t feel bad just plant one right here so at least I can have an open casket.” Dennis points in the middle of his forehead. Was this lightening the mood?

dzebulon-blog

“I don’t know about this, you’re not supposed to mix light and dark liquor. I might die.”

awkwardannarp

“Well, whoopsie. How was I supposed to know? What’s so bad about it?”

dzebulon-blog

“You’re trying to kill me. Is this vodquila and whiskey? Geeez-” This wasn’t even going to taste good.

dzebulon-blog

Off the Grid

dzebulon-blog

“Let’s be honest though. Ted Bundy is ugly as shit. If HE actually pulled ‘attractive and charming’, imagine what you would pull huh? I hope that this isn’t your way of telling me that you’re cannibalistic or a serial killer by the way.” He shook his head. No dimples. Yet. You could probably have them surgically done though.

“Awww- thanks. I’m thinking that I’ll be a big hit with lonely MILFS at PTA meetings. That’s the real reason I’m going for teaching.” He chuckled at his own joke. “I’m not enjoying the massive amounts of finger labor I get from these essays and shit but It’s a passion you know? Great art doesn’t come without suffering.” He shrugs. When he imagined himself 10 years from now it involved a classroom. An actor, model, hell yeah. “You give a David Beckham a run for his money. If not acting then modeling for sure. Or prostitute if you’re looking to rack in quick.” He’d pay at least. He would damn sure cuddle without any begging or pleading.

hawkinthenest

anationaltreasure :

send me your url and i’ll post 3-5 icons that sum up my muse’s feelings on yours

deerwithit-deactivated20150707

HOMESTUCK VOCABULARY HAS BECOME SO INGRAINED IN MY HEAD THAT I USED “AUSPITIZE” ON AN ENGLISH ESSAY AND MY TEACHER JUST PUT A QUESTION MARK NEXT TO IT.

IT TOOK ME A GOOD 5 MINUTES AND AN INTERNET SEARCH TO FIGURE IT OUT IT’S NOT A WORD TO ANYONE OUTSIDE OF HOMESTUCK.