Pro Toaster Waffle Maker

25, they/them/theirs expert bridge burner hmu, im in the shits

[ebind]

[ebind]

why am i so fucking cool, like everybody else is wandering around in a maze made of tall bushes and fuck you corn, while im out here getting pegged by far left revolutionaries who know whats up

[ebind]

tumblr is a fucking wasteland so heres some things from my drafts

yoinketh and thou shalt be yeeted

not fucking before marriage was invented by dudes who couldnt get laid

pretty fucked up how im not an anime girl

my blood runs thicc with mounty dew

nothing compares to looking a raccoon in its cold dead eyes before punting the fuckin thing

just found out that women can smell boners, so yall are fucking terrifying, real glad im gay

babe are you okay? youve barely touched your bojack horseman lofi vinyl album

big dairy doesnt want you to know they invented shitting

and finally

wine tasting but instead we just spend a day huffing different shit in my basement

[ebind]

[ebind]

my last post was 420 days ago so now is the best time to post again because of the weed number and also pot but additionally cannibis along with mary jane in addition to that sick herb

[ebind]

hey bud I think your account has been hacked or something, you’ve been invaded by the bot spam. just thought I’d tell you in case you hadn’t noticed

hey, thanks for letting me know, i havent used this account in a while but I'm changing the password, ive tried to delete all the ads but theres just an unreal amount

[knighthearts]

Visit Original Link

since i only ever send rick rolls to ppl i figured id just post one for all my followers for april fools day this year to save myself the effort

happy april fools y’all

[knighthearts]

how bad could it possibly be

[knighthearts]

this is it.  this is my favorite tag on this post

[knighthearts]

it’s time. its been a whole year since i made this post

[quinoaphoenicks]

I love you guys but I think a lot of you are the kind of people who are susceptible to falling in with a cult.

[teaboot]

You’re right. We should all band together under a trustworthy and influential leader who can keep us safe from outside threats

[snuppie]

me, a goth: My Darling, Dark Temptress Who I Love So Dearly, I Have Crocheted You This Anatomically Correct Heart As A Symbol Of My Undying Devotion

my normie gf: awww thanks babe! do you want to come to target with me?

me: Yes

[whattheshitparker-blog]

I have no followers

please love me

[ebind]

hey, i love your url, looks like you got it from my post haha, id be happy to give you a follow 😁

[kuma-kami]

Visit Original Link

[snowdaysforever]

DELETE THIS POST

[theoldspaceevibes-deactivated20]

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

[froborr]

*clicks play in morbid curiosity*

*hammers reblog button*

[hikikostar]

WOW

[timegodzo]

I’m so furious.

[ghoulishly-yours]

WOW OKAY THEN

[antivanruffles]

@antivanonmytongue

[myymsie]

@anouroboros @rhilyn @thegildedgun @only-the-stars

[itsapmseymour]

“okay what’s the ca-OHSNAPITSABANGER”

[lorileopard]

I can guaren-fucking-tee it, you’d never believe that I knew EXACTLY what this was gonna be. Holy shit fuck.

[dankmemesreasonforliving]

[cumbacon]

Me

[xxautumnivyxx]

Velma photoset will be available tomorrow. Stay tuned.

For now enjoy this.

[xxautumnivyxx]

The more this gets retweeted the more I lose my mind that it’s just normal photos I took, and yet my cosplay gets only a few hundred in comparison.

…flex all day I guess.

[geekandmisandry]

[trip-wild]

May I hit y'all with a hot take

Uncle iroh has Hawaiian shirt energy

Sokka also has the same energy but no sleeves

Thank you for your time

[visual-infinity]

Perfect napping weather

[omghotmemes]

[orzesc]

[cannon-fannon]

THIS SPEAKS TO ME ON A MOLECULAR LEVEL RIGHT NOW.

[tjspider]

You are witnessing a broken human being

[mauridianhallow]

This is actually me like constantly now

[sidevilde]

The older I get the more I identify with this when I come across it