"Spare me of irrationality and ignorance."

Espresso Cookie Rp Blog!

[ebressobookie]

" Yes, I'm here. What now? "

" I was peer pressured into creating this blog. "

"I suppose I can answer any of your inquiries if you so desire.. "

Mod Intro + DNI + Headcanon list under the cut!

GREETINGSSSS!!

My other blogs <3:

@puppy-pawz588 (main)

@queen-of-greed

@flame-guardian

@fallen-cacao-prince

@unripestrawberry-cookie

@creamwolf-captain

@bhadow-bilk-bpookie

@sweetest-on-earthbread

@sweet-sugarfly

@nutmeg-general

My pronouns are She/They/It, my nickname is Puppy. I AM A MINOR! I will allow minor flirting, but freaky shit is a no-go!

Dni list!:

-Nazis/Racists

- Pedophiles/Zoophiles

- Misogynists

- Tr-mp/El-n supporters

If anything was forgotten on this dni list, I will add it on a later date.

Headcanons!!:

- Espresso Cookie is transmasc

- He has an anxiety disorder

- ZERO tolerance for spicy food, he will explode

- He has ARFID

- He will start 20 projects at once and not sleep until all of them are finished

- Espresso Cookie has hypoglycemia

- He has hallucinations when he experiences extreme anxiety, which is rather often as a result of his caffeine addiction.

I MIGHTTT update this

ALSO, THIS BLOG SHIPS MADELEINE X ESPRESSO

[ebressobookie]

Espresso Cookie how is strawberry crepe? Are they good?

have they toned down their rowdiness and defiance? They seem like a handful. Although very cute little thing!!!

What are they doing currently? Probably playing with their wafflebots.

"They are currently sending bomb threats to the Golden Kingdom."

[ebressobookie]

WE WANNA KNOW ARE YOU DATING MADELEINE

"...He's literally my husband."

[psychologica-warfare-and-cats]

I could replace him. I’m smarter and also my autism is better.

[ebressobookie]

"Nice try, but everyone knows my autism is far superior to either of yours!"

[ebressobookie]

WE WANNA KNOW ARE YOU DATING MADELEINE

"...He's literally my husband."

[ebressobookie]

FUCK YOUU (genderbends your espresso) HEHEHEHHEHE

-Rabbitwitch Anon

"...what the fuck."

Espresso Cookie is now experiencing extreme dysphoria. Congratulations!

[madeleines-republic]

"Please tell Clotted Cream Cookie to stop sexually harassing me"

— @ebressobookie

"HE'S...he's what?"

He blinked, taken aback by the information. He then quickly lunges forward, pulling Espresso Cookie into a tight embrace.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!"

Financier Cookie sighs.

"He's been real flirty, huh. He even flirted with me the other day...don't worry, Espresso Cookie, I'll take care of it."

[ebressobookie]

"If he approaches me after a divorce one more time, I will personally deliver him to the king of the Cacao Kingdom to push him into the licorice sea"

[ebressobookie]

"So, Sir Espresso Cookie, I've heard that you and Ser Madeleine Cookie are getting a divorce again, no?"

"Yes, I've grown tired of his constant tomfoolery and nonsensical yapping."

[imcallingtheguards]

"I agree with that, honestly. Ser Madeleine Cookie is...well, rather cocky and immature. Wouldn't you like someone who's more...sophisticated?"

He smiles.

[ebressobookie]

"Yes, but... I must admit, I have a begrudging affection toward him.. In spite of my annoyance."

[imcallingtheguards]

"Mhm, yes, I see..."

He sighed slightly, but he remained standing in good posture.

"Well, you know, I'm always here, as a good option to consider!"

[ebressobookie]

Espresso Cookie backs away slightly.

"...Right... Sure... I shall get back to you if that offer ever piques my interest, consul... "

("Though, I highly doubt it will")

[ebressobookie]

"So, Sir Espresso Cookie, I've heard that you and Ser Madeleine Cookie are getting a divorce again, no?"

"Yes, I've grown tired of his constant tomfoolery and nonsensical yapping."

[imcallingtheguards]

"I agree with that, honestly. Ser Madeleine Cookie is...well, rather cocky and immature. Wouldn't you like someone who's more...sophisticated?"

He smiles.

[ebressobookie]

"Yes, but... I must admit, I have a begrudging affection toward him.. In spite of my annoyance."

[ebressobookie]

"So, Sir Espresso Cookie, I've heard that you and Ser Madeleine Cookie are getting a divorce again, no?"

"Yes, I've grown tired of his constant tomfoolery and nonsensical yapping."

[ebressobookie]

@madeleines-republic

" I want a divorce "

[madeleines-republic]

"Espresso Cookie, not again...!!! I explained my reasons to saying this, and you know it! Must I repeat myself? Do you love hearing my voice that much?"

He was...partially joking. In fact, he liked to speak to Espresso Cookie, whether he was "exposing" him or not.

"Also, you don't want one! Who would even think of divorcing the beautiful Divine, Madeleine Cookie?"

He laughs for his own amusement.

"I'll get the papers..."

[ebressobookie]

" Thank you, Financier cookie.. if only SOMEONE could be as competent as you are!"

He pinches the bridge of his nose, sighing softly.

[madeleines-republic]

"Anytime, Espresso Cookie. I know Madeleine Cookie can be rather...hm, well, obnoxious, loud..."

Financier Cookie sighs before she sits down at a desk full of papers. Wedding Cake Cookie used to give her stacks of divorce papers, with tears in her eyes.

"Pardon?! I-...Financier Cookie, how rude of you! Hmph!"

Madeleine Cookie crosses his arms before he looks to Espresso Cookie.

"I'm sure Wedding Cake Cookie is tired of us...can't we just stay happy and...I dunno, together?"

[ebressobookie]

Espresso finishes signing the paper. He turns back to Madeleine, having not heard what he said.

" What was that? "

He passes the paper to Madeleine Cookie like it's a routine.. which it kind of is by now.

[madeleines-republic]

"I was thinking we could just stay, like, together..."

He begins writing an elegant signature on the paper, sighing before he hands it back to Financier Cookie. He twirled his finger in circles on the desk.

"I have a brilliant idea for you, Espresso Cookie. We couulldd just divorce once a week! How does that sound?"

He leans closer to Espresso Cookie, causing Financier Cookie to let out a soft chuckle.

[ebressobookie]

"..and why exactly are we trying to schedule our divorces?"

Espresso questions, shoving his pen in his pocket and then crossing his arms.

"That's a rather odd thing to say, Madeleine cookie!"

[ebressobookie]

@madeleines-republic

" I want a divorce "

[madeleines-republic]

"Espresso Cookie, not again...!!! I explained my reasons to saying this, and you know it! Must I repeat myself? Do you love hearing my voice that much?"

He was...partially joking. In fact, he liked to speak to Espresso Cookie, whether he was "exposing" him or not.

"Also, you don't want one! Who would even think of divorcing the beautiful Divine, Madeleine Cookie?"

He laughs for his own amusement.

"I'll get the papers..."

[ebressobookie]

" Thank you, Financier cookie.. if only SOMEONE could be as competent as you are!"

He pinches the bridge of his nose, sighing softly.

[madeleines-republic]

"Anytime, Espresso Cookie. I know Madeleine Cookie can be rather...hm, well, obnoxious, loud..."

Financier Cookie sighs before she sits down at a desk full of papers. Wedding Cake Cookie used to give her stacks of divorce papers, with tears in her eyes.

"Pardon?! I-...Financier Cookie, how rude of you! Hmph!"

Madeleine Cookie crosses his arms before he looks to Espresso Cookie.

"I'm sure Wedding Cake Cookie is tired of us...can't we just stay happy and...I dunno, together?"

[ebressobookie]

Espresso finishes signing the paper. He turns back to Madeleine, having not heard what he said.

" What was that? "

He passes the paper to Madeleine Cookie like it's a routine.. which it kind of is by now.

[ebressobookie]

@madeleines-republic

" I want a divorce "

[madeleines-republic]

"Espresso Cookie, not again...!!! I explained my reasons to saying this, and you know it! Must I repeat myself? Do you love hearing my voice that much?"

He was...partially joking. In fact, he liked to speak to Espresso Cookie, whether he was "exposing" him or not.

"Also, you don't want one! Who would even think of divorcing the beautiful Divine, Madeleine Cookie?"

He laughs for his own amusement.

"I'll get the papers..."

[ebressobookie]

" Thank you, Financier cookie.. if only SOMEONE could be as competent as you are!"

He pinches the bridge of his nose, sighing softly.

[ebressobookie]

@madeleines-republic

" I want a divorce "

[ebressobookie]

*a cookie with short red hair was just standing there, she had a frown and was not happy*

@liz-cookie

Espresso Cookie can't help but notice. This woman catches his eye for no real reason in particular. Perhaps it was the striking color of her hair or the displeased expression on her face... or even just the mysterious aura that seems to surround her entire being. He decides to approach.

"Hello, ma'am. Please, pardon my intrusion.. "

[liz-cookie]

*she looked at him and tilted her head*

“Ah sorry, I got lost and I dunno where to go so I ended up here”

*dark cherry was inside her mothers cloak, scared and a bit intimidated from the atmosphere*

[ebressobookie]

"Ah, I figured as much.. You don't appear to be from the republic.. Not to intrude, but please, do tell where you're visiting from? "

[liz-cookie]

“Not visiting but I’m from the cacao kingdom, I’m the queen, we recently divorced and we need a place to stay”

*she looked at the cookie, her cheeks getting a bit pink but slapped them*

[ebressobookie]

"Is that right...?"

Espresso Cookie leans a little closer (a little too close), inspecting the woman's face. He then pulls away and turns to walk away.

"Well, good luck with that, ma'am!"

[liz-cookie]

*she sighed and fanned her face to calm down*

“The hell is this feeling..I’ve never felt like this..only when I was with him..”

*her face was more red*

[ebressobookie]

With that, Espresso Cookie takes his leave. His hands remain folded neatly behind his back, the curls in his hair lightly bobbing up and down with each step he takes.

[ebressobookie]

*a cookie with short red hair was just standing there, she had a frown and was not happy*

@liz-cookie

Espresso Cookie can't help but notice. This woman catches his eye for no real reason in particular. Perhaps it was the striking color of her hair or the displeased expression on her face... or even just the mysterious aura that seems to surround her entire being. He decides to approach.

"Hello, ma'am. Please, pardon my intrusion.. "

[liz-cookie]

*she looked at him and tilted her head*

“Ah sorry, I got lost and I dunno where to go so I ended up here”

*dark cherry was inside her mothers cloak, scared and a bit intimidated from the atmosphere*

[ebressobookie]

"Ah, I figured as much.. You don't appear to be from the republic.. Not to intrude, but please, do tell where you're visiting from? "

[liz-cookie]

“Not visiting but I’m from the cacao kingdom, I’m the queen, we recently divorced and we need a place to stay”

*she looked at the cookie, her cheeks getting a bit pink but slapped them*

[ebressobookie]

"Is that right...?"

Espresso Cookie leans a little closer (a little too close), inspecting the woman's face. He then pulls away and turns to walk away.

"Well, good luck with that, ma'am!"

[ebressobookie]

*a cookie with short red hair was just standing there, she had a frown and was not happy*

@liz-cookie

Espresso Cookie can't help but notice. This woman catches his eye for no real reason in particular. Perhaps it was the striking color of her hair or the displeased expression on her face... or even just the mysterious aura that seems to surround her entire being. He decides to approach.

"Hello, ma'am. Please, pardon my intrusion.. "

[liz-cookie]

*she looked at him and tilted her head*

“Ah sorry, I got lost and I dunno where to go so I ended up here”

*dark cherry was inside her mothers cloak, scared and a bit intimidated from the atmosphere*

[ebressobookie]

"Ah, I figured as much.. You don't appear to be from the republic.. Not to intrude, but please, do tell where you're visiting from? "

[ebressobookie]

*a cookie with short red hair was just standing there, she had a frown and was not happy*

@liz-cookie

Espresso Cookie can't help but notice. This woman catches his eye for no real reason in particular. Perhaps it was the striking color of her hair or the displeased expression on her face... or even just the mysterious aura that seems to surround her entire being. He decides to approach.

"Hello, ma'am. Please, pardon my intrusion.. "