ETHEREAL FANTASY

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

Incomplete

Sheltered by reality 

I grew naive

Afraid to try new things

My world stood still

As I’m growing older

Regrets keep piling higher

Full of Wishful Thinking

But never the courage in doing

-elevram

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

As I let others define me 

I started to lose my sense of identity

Nothing on my own 

I cling to mediocrity

Who are you

A question with no definite response

Who made you

Countless answers come to mind

-elevram

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

First Love

Whenever I think of you, All the memories comes crashing back in

From your sweet confession to our first kiss

Those secret glances we make is something I will always miss

A bittersweet love is what you are

Something I tried to forget but keeps on coming back

I say that I feel mad for even remembering 

Though deep inside, the thought of you still makes me smile

Talking on the phone all night but still missing you after

Sending love notes during class which always kept us in trouble

Our promises of forever that I wished was never broken

They say first love never really works out

I guess we’re one those unlucky people

Still I wished we begged differ

BY having our own happily ever after

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

It took me by surprise Never realized time was so short until you were gone Left me with all these questions that will never be answered All the promises we made Now will be unkept

Nobody ever knew our secret affair Which I swore will remain Forever hidden in my heart Til death do us apart

You are my first love The only one who made my heart thumped Am I allowed to feel this way Even though you're gone away

I'll never know what I am worth In your eyes, oh how it hurts Was I even the love of your life or Just another inignificant girl?

- J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

Stigma

A memory, that's all you are now to me Something I think about whenever I'm feeling nostalgic Yet why does it still hurt everytime I remember you? You're like a stigma in my heart that can never be removed

- J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

I loved you more than I thought I could Who would have thought that this selfish heart of mine was capable You broke down all of my walls Every defenses I've built In order to protect myself from falling

Just when I thought I could never be faltered You showed me that even the hardest of hearts can be shattered I cried and cried even when there were no more tears that dropped The scars that you've left will forever remain in my heart

You shouldn't have taught me how to love If you will also teach me the pain of losing What the point of learning when all I will be left of are regrets

- J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

Karma

Its surreal feeling To actually hear that you also felt it The feeling of being out of place

You dont even know how often I felt that way Misplaced in my own circle With no one to talk to

I've finally moved on Tried to widen my horizon But you suddenly show interest Which is something I cannot comprehend

Does it bother you seeing me happy? You keep telling me that my world is too small I cannot go on being that way

I only followed your advice So can you practice what you preach?

- J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

Reminiscence

We used to be inseparable Like conjoined twins, we were always together I know all your secrets and you knew mine I thought that would never change until the end of time

Look at us now, we're like strangers I can't even remember the last time we talked We were both so caught up in our own lives that we have grown apart How could something so important be forgotten in an instant?

You were the one I could trust wholeheartedly My best friend, my soul sister I miss the way we were

- J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

Never Look Back

I cannot undo the past Nor can you We all make mistakes But not all can be forgotten

As days go by The further we drift apart We can never go back to the way we were The distance between us have grown too much

There is nothing more to be done But to move on I’ve made my peace And so should you

- J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

Opposite Attraction

I was in love with idea of being in love itself It didn’t matter who it was, as long as I could feel it

I’ve always thought of love as something magical That it could go against all odds no matter what the circumstances

I was surprised at her naivety Her simple outlook in life So innocent yet intriguing

He is one of those boys most people warn you about Those dangerous look in his eyes Daunting and alluring at the same time

We never knew how small our world was until we found each other

- J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

Facing Reality

We are all deluded by this concept of love Like how we wish that in some moments that time would just stop but in the end, we’re just scared of facing reality That we will go back to our boring old lives And all those wishful fantasies we had will never come true

- J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

Gratuitous Fidelity

All I ever wanted was someone who will love me for what I am Someone who will stay even after seeing all my imperfections

Maybe I’m too naive to think that there is such love especially in the world today where most people take everything for granted

- J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

Idée Fixe

I did everything you wanted Never had a dream for my path was already written But even after all that, I guess it’s still wasn’t enough I’m still not enough

Now I’m regretting all I have done Though there is no more way but forward I hope you’ll always remember that you’re the reason for my misery All this suffering I’m feeling Just to please your own avidity

-J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

Scars

All of us are broken in different kinds of way Some may have it worse but in the end, its all the same We shouldn’t let our scars control our lives Its simply a reminder that we survived That we were strong enough to make it through

Find the courage to move forward Don’t dwell too much in the past For we are living in the present Don’t give in to fear But never try to conquer it all Because without it, there wouldn’t be balance at all

- J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

The distance left for me to call it love, slowly I’m walking towards it with uncertainty. Is this finally it or will I be let down again with the hopes of falling in love? Still with this fragile heart of mine, I gather up the courage to pursue what might be a once in a lifetime romance. For in hesitation, I may lose it all.

- J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

I'm Sorry

You were this so called cool guy But deep inside you’re just a lonely boy with a lot to hide I was this timid girl, desperately trying to fit in

I never meant to break your heart I just didn’t know what love was I was in love with the idea of being in love I guess it didn’t matter who it was

I’m sorry it had to be you All because of my selfish greed You had to be hurt by me

I’m not doing this to earn your forgiveness Because I know I don’t deserve it You didn’t do anything wrong but I left you there hanging

Without a single word, I left your life with no trace You kept on looking for me, not knowing I didn’t want to be found Desperately asking, forever hoping

I choose to be the bad guy cause I really am Yet you were willing to forgive me After all that I’ve done How much more cruel do you want me to be

In the end, I decided to hurt you once more So that you’ll hate me and begin your life again That’s all I can ask for For you to find someone who can love you Enough to make all the pain go away

-J.S.

[eccendentesiastdreamer]

The Answer

What answer did you want me to say? The one you wanted to hear Or the truth that you always feared? Cause you know I can’t take the pain away I could only delay it

- J.S.