Alexander: where do you want to be in 5 years?
Laurens: *mumbles* hopefully in your bed
Alexander: what?
Laurens: I SAID HOPEFULLY DEAD

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@edge-wood
Alexander: where do you want to be in 5 years?
Laurens: *mumbles* hopefully in your bed
Alexander: what?
Laurens: I SAID HOPEFULLY DEAD
Laurens/Alexander:*walking and holding hands*
Alexander: *bumps into Eliza and Maria Reynolds holding hands* Eliza!
Eliza: Alexander!
Alexander/Eliza: Please donāt tell Phillip!
hamilton vines
burr: so basically, what is was thinking is -
hamilton: punches him
burr: ah fuck, i can't believe you've done this
-
eliza, watching hamilton and laurens: two bros, chillin in a hot tub, five feet apart cause they're not gay
-
hamilton: is there anything better than pussy? yes, a really good book *piano chord*
-
eliza: i should've left you on that street corner where you stood
hamilton: but ya didn't
-
hamilton: hey thomas you think i can get this egg into that jar without it cracking
jefferson: no
hamilton, throwing the egg full force at jefferson: i guess you're right
-
cabinet members, watching hamilton and jefferson fight: can i get a waffle. can i please get a waffle
-
peggy: jello? more like hello *chokes on the jello*
-
jefferson, skating in on wheelies: good evening
-
lafayette, buried in sand: i am the sand guardian, guardian of the sand
mulligan: POSEIDON QUIVERS BEFORE HIM
lafayette to the ocean: fuck off!
-
hamilton: don't fuck with me. i have the power of God and ishmael on my side. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
-
hamilton: toss me my keys
eliza: *throws a christmas tree at him*
hamilton: i said keys
eliza: i thought you said christmas tree!
hamilton: why the f u c k would you think i said-
-
madison: if i had a penny for every time i wasn't cool, i'd have no pennies
-
someone: who's the hottest uber driver you've ever had
maria: um, i never went to oovo javer
-
angelica: saw you hanging out with caitlyn yesterday
hamilton: re-rebecca, it's not what you think!
angelica: i won't hesitate, biTCH
-
hamilton: yo, what's the scoop?
laurens, biking up: penis
-
burr to angelica: other guys'll just feed you lines. but i'll take you to mickey-deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees!
-
jefferson, madison, and burr coming to hamilton about the reynolds affair: you ready to fuckin' die?
hamilton: i'm a bad bitch, you can't kill me
-
washinton: people are constantly asking me "what's it like to be a sex symbol?"
washington: *slips and bangs his head hard*
-
hamilton: i'm sucking my own dick and dying
-
hamilton: and they were roommates
jefferson: oh my god they were roommates
-
eliza to phillip: if your name is junior, and you're really handsome, c'mon raise your hand
phillip: *bashfully raises his hand*
-
angelica: hey, i'm lesbian
phillip: i thought you were american
-
maria: hey alexander
alexander: sup bitch
maria: haha stop
alexander: bitch
maria: SFISJOAIFJSOIF UGH
-
jefferson: oh sorry i fell asleep while i was waiting on you to make me a sandwich
angelica: go back to sleep and starve
-
phillip: hey mom say "who want lasagna"
eliza: who want lasagn-
eliza: *runs into the kitchen counter*
-
burr: you know, sometimes i think to myself "what are you waiting for you dumb stupid fuck"
-
angelica: go suck a dick! suck a dick! suck a dick! suck a motherfucking dick
eliza: suck a dick! suck a huge or small dick
-
washington just before resigning: i don't know what fuck just happened, but i don't really care, imma get the fuck up outa here, fuck this shit i'm out
-
peggy: before i die, i'm gonna finish a chapstick without loosing it
peggy, two hours later: i lost that motherfucker
-
hamilton to washington: you are my dad (you're my dad!) boogie woogie woogie
-
angelica: two shots of vodka...
angelica: *pours the whole bottle in*
-
madison: hey how much you pay for that taco
jefferson: hey you know this boy's got his free taco
jefferson: *slips, falls, and drops the taco*
-
peggy: hey do you want to go out to eat
eliza: no, i don't really want to
peggy: you're right, why would we go out when we have
angelica, eliza, and peggy: canned soup
-
lafayette: i'm washing me and my clothes, bitch
laurens: he's drunk as fuck...
lafayette: i'm washing me AND my clothes
-
genie: i am a genie and i will grant you three w-
hamilton: i'd like to immediatly take your place
genie: really? i was trapped in there for 10,000 years of isolated slumber
hamilton, clapping his hands: i know
This isn't really aimed specifically at anyone but?? Maybe don't make fun of someone's pronouns??
Hey if you use neopronouns I! Support!! You!!! One again, if someone is mean to you tell me and I will kick! Them!! In!!! The!!! Teeth!!!! :)
god bless the youtube musical bootleg communityĀ
reblog this to be blessed with perfect turnip prices all week⦠happy sunday!!Ā
Excuse me while I cry
And todayās third (and most important) birthday goes to FLICK!
Natās son and proud bug cultist, Flick spends his time making art of the wonderful swarms you bequeath upon him. He doesnāt get along with his dad that well, for Flick loves bugs deeply, whereas Nat eats them. Despite Nintendoās attempts to state otherwise, Flick is CJās partner in crime, and they are very happy boyfriends whose home is filled with so many fish and bugs that you can barely find floorspace to scoot around.Ā
When you next see him, wish our local bug aficionado a very very bug-infested Happy Birthday!Ā
a message from Butch
Why "doing something relaxingā does not help your anxiety
A lot of the time when people give advice intended to relieve anxiety, they suggest doing ārelaxingā things like drawing, painting, knitting, taking a bubble bath, coloring in one of those zen coloring books, or watching glitter settle to the bottom of a jar.
This advice is always well-intentioned, and Iām not here to diss people who either give it or who benefit from it. But it has never, ever done shit for me, and this is because it goes about resolving anxiety in the completely wrong way. Ā
THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO when suffering from anxiety is to do a ārelaxingā thing that just enables your mind to dwell and obsess more on the thing thatās bothering you. You need to ESCAPE from the dwelling and the obsession in order to experience relief.
You can drive to a quiet farm, drive to the beach, drive to a park, or anywhere else, but as someone who has tried it all many, many times, trust meāitās a waste of gas. You will just end up still sad and stressed, only with sand on your butt.Ā You canāt physically escape your sadness. Your sadness is inside of you. To escape, you need to give your brain something to play with for a while until you can approach the issue with a healthier frame of mind.Ā
People who have anxiety do not need more time to contemplate, because we will use it to contemplate how much we suck.
In fact, you could say thatās what anxiety isāhyper-contemplating. When we let our minds run free, they run straight into the thorn bushes. Our minds are already running, and they need to be controlled. They need to be given something to do, or theyāll destroy everything, just like an overactive husky dog ripping up all the furniture.Ā
Therefore, I present to you:Ā
THINGS YOU SHOULD NOT DO WHEN ANXIOUS
āGo on a walk
āWatch a sunset, watch fish in an aquarium, watch glitter, etc.
āGo anywhere where the main activity is sitting and watching
āDraw, color, do anything that occupies the hands and not the mind
āDo yoga, jog, go fishing, or anything that lets you mentally driftĀ
āDo literally ANYTHING that gives you great amounts of mental space to obsess and dwell on things.
THINGS YOU SHOULD DO WHEN ANXIOUS:
āDo a crossword puzzle, Sudoku, or any other mind teaser game. Crosswords are the best.
āWrite something. It doesnāt have to be a masterpiece. Write the Top 10 Best Restaurants in My City. Rank celebrities according to Best Smile. Write some dumb Legolas fanfiction and rip it up when youāre done. Itās not for publication, itās a relief exercise that only you will see.Ā
āRead something, watch TV, or watch a movieāas long as itās engrossing. Donāt watch anything which you can run as background noise (like, off the top of my head, Say Yes to The Dress.) As weird as it seems, American Horror Story actually helps me a lot, because it sucks me in.Ā
āMasturbate. Yes, Iām serious. Your mind has to concentrate on the mini-movie itās running. It canāt run Sexy Titillating Things and All The Things That are Bothering Me at the same time. (ā¦I hope. If it can, thenā¦ignore this one.)Ā
āDo math problemsāliterally, google āalgebra problems worksheetā and solve them. If you havenāt done math since 7th grade this will really help you. I donāt mean with math, I mean with the anxiety.Ā
āPlay a game or a sport with someone that requires great mental concentration. Working with 5 people to get a ball over a net is a challenge which will require your brain to turn off the Sadness Channel.Ā
āPlay a video game, as long as itās not something like candy crush or Tetris thatās mindless.Ā
THINGS YOU SHOULD DO DURING PANIC ATTACKS ESPECIALLY:
āList the capitals of all the U.S. states
āList the capitals of all the European countries
āList all the shapes you can see. Or all the colors.Ā
āList all the blonde celebrities you can think of.
āPull up a random block of text and count all theĀ As in it, or Es or whatever. Ā
Now obviously, I am not a doctor. I am just an anxious person who has tried almost everything to help myself. Ā Iāve finally realized that the stuff people recommendĀ never worksĀ because this is a disorder that thrives on free time and free mental space. When I do the stuff I listed above, I can breathe again. And I hope it helps someone here too.Ā
(Now this shouldnāt have to be said but if theĀ ādo notsā work for you then by all means do them. Theyāve just never worked for me.)
This wouldāve been great an hour ago
If your anxiety includes rapid heartbeat for no reason then it may help to exercise! It helps for me because Iām focused on whatever moves Iām doing and breathing, and it gives my heart rate a reason to be that high so that I can start the slow cooking down process and (hopefully) bring that heart rate down with it. Look up a quick cardio workout on YouTube or something and just do it in your room!
This is so, SO true.Ā
AllĀ ādoing something relaxingā ever did for me was give my brain MORE free time to FREAK THE FUCK OUT.Ā
I like how this boil down to grabbing something then tell the brains weasels to GO FETCH YOU PIECES OF SHIT
YOU WANT THE STIMULUS? G O G E T I T
Reenactor throws a spear at a drone
What a time to be alive.
āThe medieval warrior, realizing the consequences of his impulsive act, immediately approached the owner of the drone and offered to pay for the damage.
The owner of the drone was so impressed by the brilliant attack that he suggested organizing a competition for bringing down ādragonsā with short spears next year.
Drone owners have another year to develop a unique ādragon-likeā design for their flying machines.ā (x)
I am 100% cooler with this knowing that the spear-thrower realizedĀ āoops maybe I shouldnāt have done thatā and tried to make it right, andĀ that the guy who the drone belonged to was cool with it
just so everyone knows, this has already been memorialized in a runestone
Everything about this post blesses those involved with a +4 on their next Today is Good Day roll
I crack up every time at seeing that runestone.Ā
Resetti, the big softie, will comp you if you donāt have the miles to pay him, and he is willing to do so more than onceā¦
;__;
imma gonna cry
may i add
Agent 8: Synonyms are weird because if you invite someone to your cottage in the forest that just sounds nice and cozy, but if I invite you to my cabin in the woods youāre going to die.
Callie: My favorite is explaining the difference between a ābutt dialā and a ābooty callā.
Marie: Itās called connotation.
Agent 4: Try this one on for size: āForgive me, Father, I have sinnedā versus āSorry, Daddy, Iāve been naughtyā.
Agent 3: Great news! Language is now banned.
Them Salmon Run feels
Real shit
My favorite form of redemption arc isĀ āI hate that I have morals nowā
LikeĀ āI realized that I was in the wrong and now I will work hard to atoneā is good and all, butĀ āhow dare you infect me with moralsā will always be so much more entertaining
That moment the former baddie starts to walk away from some bad situation, almost gets out, and then just stops, curses, and turns around to go help?
*chefās kiss* delicious
This one gets it
HUN, I WILL NEVER FORGET YOU. SOMEBODY HAS TO COLLECT FOR THE MUSEUM AND PAY FOR THE PUBLIC WORKS PROJECTS
Animal crossing was my get-away. Growing up, I made many animal friends. I got yelled at by Resetti because I played the battery out, I made prints and listened to the music in the Able Sister's shop, I wore the weirdest outfits.
Animal crossing has always had a special spot in my heart and New Horizons will give me new hope and happiness in these wild times.