and it’s all because I cant SavE My MoNEy
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@eekamoo
and it’s all because I cant SavE My MoNEy
listen. aging into your thirties rocks. yes your joints get a little creaky. yes you can’t sleep in a pretzel on the floor anymore after a concert or a convention. and you lose some friends. but the thing is that you sort out who your real friends are and you sort out who you really are. and you get to see your friends settling into careers they like, and adopt new dogs and cats, and you find a job you can stand, and get really good at arts and crafts, and maybe that book you loved as a kid gets a movie deal and it doesn’t suck, and you learn to like new food and bake your own bread, and you realize that the great portfolio of self harm scars you all used to curate are going white with age and not updated, and half your friends are a different gender now and so much happier and maybe you are too, and you know who you are, and that it’s a journey and not a revelation. it’s a direction you’re headed, and you’re enjoying the trip.
reaching your 30′s rocks. and i’m hearing good things about what comes next, too.
i am looking into your eyes, i am holding your hand. i absolutely promise.
if you can just live long enough, your soul will build your body into a home. you will live there and you will find a way to be at peace. it’s worth the time and it’s worth the work. i promise.
Your soul will build your body into a home.
Never thought my soul would make it this far. Now it's franticly building back the walls of this body home and trying to water the plants (hobbies) of our youth back into existence.
My Mother in Me. Poem written by me.
Imposter Syndrome feels extra real when you never thought you’d make it this long.
“Loving someone is like moving into a house. At first you fall in love with all the new things, amazed every morning that all this belongs to you, as if fearing that someone would suddenly come rushing through the door to explain that a terrible mistake has been made, you weren’t actually supposed to live in a wonderful place like this. Then over the years the walls become weathered, the wood splinters here and there, and you start to love that house not so much because of all its perfection, but rather for its imperfections. You get to know all the nooks and crannies. How to avoid getting the key caught in the lock when it’s cold outside. Which of the floorboards flex slightly when one steps on them or exactly how to open the wardrobe doors without them creaking. These are the little secrets that make it your home.” -A Man Called Ove. Fredrick Backman.
i always wanted to send you a letter, but only to tell you how unlovable you made me feel. i’m still trying to shake off this feeling years later.
i make psychedelic klezmerfunk (he/him) on Twitter: "i've mentioned this before but one of the hardest things about adhd is how it can WRECK your relationships because you don't have friendship degradation mechanics like everyone else" / Twitter
https://mobile.twitter.com/khoshtistic/status/1352309916153872385?prefetchtimestamp=1611372481352
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Jan 21
like my friendship degradation mechanics are just straight up broken, i can go YEARS without hearing from someone at all and still feeling exactly the same level of familiarity about them. but they don't because friendship degrades if you don't take care of it
it's just kinda like. sad bc no matter how hard i try to keep up with friendships i'll inevitably have a dry spell of a few months and by that point the other person has moved on, because, why wouldn't they? it's the one skill my adhd fucks on the hardest
anyways this is why i like being friends with other adhd/autistic/neurodivergent people bc we see each other and it's "AYYYY" every time alkgnsfd friendship degradation mechanic broke for both of us
i wish people understood like. people who do this don't deliberately ghost people, it's "i thought it had been 2 days but it's actually been 2 weeks and now this person will be really mad at me so i guess i can't say anything now" and then that KEEPS HAPPENING
it's just a nasty bundle of like. object permanence issues and being unable to perceive time, and one of the big issues is people assuming we're doing this on purpose or something when it's like "I AM TRYING SO HARD AND IT'S LIKE SAND THRU MY FINGERS"
it does feel a lot like trying to pump out a lake armed with only a fork
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people with adhd be counting on their fingers not because they cant count but because otherwise theyll forget how much theyve counted. im people with adhd
there is light somewhere. / it may not be much light but / it beats the / darkness.
Charles Bukowski, from “the laughing heart” (via wordscanbeenough)
When you’re an artist, it’s because there’s something inside you that you can’t keep from spilling out. Maybe it comes in the form of sentences, or a grand jeté, or a stroke of a paintbrush. The end result can be a million different things. But the seed, it’s always the same. It’s the emotion there isn’t a word for. The feeling that’s too big for your body. To show someone your soul, you have to bleed. People who are comfortable—people who are content—they don’t create art.
Jodi Picoult, from The Book of Two Ways (Ballantine, 2020)
When you’re an artist, it’s because there’s something inside you that you can’t keep from spilling out. Maybe it comes in the form of sentences, or a grand jeté, or a stroke of a paintbrush. The end result can be a million different things. But the seed, it’s always the same. It’s the emotion there isn’t a word for. The feeling that’s too big for your body. To show someone your soul, you have to bleed. People who are comfortable—people who are content—they don’t create art.
Jodi Picoult, from The Book of Two Ways (Ballantine, 2020)
When a person tells you you hurt them, you don’t get to decide you didn’t.
Louis C.K.
This has long been one of the most influential quotes I have ever come across. Completely changes my perspective on soooo many situations in my past.
(via c-isnenegro)
keeping up with the american elections while not being american like
keeping up with the american elections while being american like
#colorful #pastel #roses with #chocolate #truffle #birthday #cake #cakedecorating #cakedecorator #safeway #food #buttercream #pnw #Oregon #pink #purple #foodart #yummy #beautiful