Anti-Mileven was never really so much about eleven needing to be independent, because she has shown that she is multiple times in the show. It’s more so about Mike, how he clearly feels about her, and more so how he treats her.
Mike has only really been seen complimenting her on her powers. He has shown to have genuine feelings for her which I will not deny, but it almost feels like he runs out of things to compliment her on. He has stated multiple times that she is his super hero, she has powers, and thats why he believes she can do anything and should find confidence— which just feels shallow the more you think about it.
If someone only complimented you on your artistic talent, because you were a good painter, you wouldn’t feel fulfilled by just that. If someone only complimented you on how fast you were, it wouldn’t feel fulfilling.
Also despite how many times he’s declared love for her, when they break up, the first person he is ready to chase after and apologize too, is Will. And yes he stood by the phone to apologize to Eleven— but why isn’t be bicycling in the rain to go apologize to her too? It just shows where his mind is at if you ask me.
Honestly I feel like Mileven was cute when they were kids, but as they grew it began to feel like middle school relationship where two people began to outgrow eachother.
Also to look at the difference between them seeing each other in season 4 and 5, it just strengthens my feelings on this idea. Sure you could argue there are different circumstances, but either way it would be more growth for both characters if they cut off the relationship.