Except that bisexual has always meant multiple things, from the time it was invented. The first recorded use of the word was in reference to "a person who is medically both male and female." At almost the same time, it was used to mean "heterosexual and homosexual attraction," which, given the limited understanding of gender at the time, that covered all genders.
For decades, trans people were included under the banner of "bi," because gender identity and sexual orientation hadn't been split yet, so if you were born male and transitioned to female then you were bisexual, because you had been "both" genders. It included intersex people, because they were "both" male and female at the same time. It included asexual people, because their level of attraction to all genders was the same (ie: no sexual attraction, regardless of gender.) And, of course, it included people who were attracted to their own gender and to other genders.
Since the very begining, bisexual has been a term that's had multiple definitions and has been applied to many different groups of people - many of whom would now use different terms to describe themselves. But at one point, if you were ace, trans, non binary, intersex, or into more than one gender, then you would universally self-describe as bisexual.
The fact that the word starts with "bi" is practically meaningless, given how many different types of orientations and genders the word has been used to describe since it was invented. Clinging to the "bi means two" concept completely erases the many and varied types of people who have been described as bi or who have self-described as bi since the mid-1800s.
If youre super desperate to adhere to the "bi means two" element of the word, then a good modern descriptor is "attraction to the same gender and other genders." That's two clearly delineated concepts, while still being accurate to the actual meaning of the term.
But it has never, in its entire history, exclusively meant "guys and gals," and to claim it did then or does now is wholly inaccurate.
(And even if it did mean solely "males and females" -- which, again: it doesn't and never did -- then trans people would still be included in that, given that trans men are men and trans women are women.)
Furthermore, given the history of "bisexual" being applied to trans people, intersex people, and people attracted to more than one gender, bisexuals have been some of the foremost pioneers of gender identity for over a century. Bisexuals are historically more aware of gender nuance than many other people, because of the fact that up til the late 70s/early 80s, trans/intersex/multi-gender-attracted-people were all called bisexual.
The bisexual manifesto was written in 1990 and was a summary of bisexual attitudes at the time, and it straight up says:
Do not assume that bisexuality is binary or dougamous in nature; that we must have "two" sides or that we MUST be involved simultaneously with both genders to be fulfilled human beings. In fact, don't assume that there are only two genders.
Over 30 years ago, bisexuals were straight up saying "don't assume that bi means two, or that there are only two genders." There's other literature going back decades that talk of similar concepts -- of bisexuality including multiple genders, in terms of both attraction and identity.
You said "inclusion means helping everyone understand what might be new to them. This isn't done by tearing down where they've come from," and I wholly agree. And where the term bisexual comes from is from a long history of various different meanings that at no stage meant solely "attraction to men and women only and nothing outside of that binary."
Is the history of the word messy and confusing? Yes. Is that annoying? Yes. Would it be more convenient if there was a neater, more clearly defined history without so many overlapping identities? Absolutely. Unfortunately, bisexuals in the 60s/70s/80s/90s weren't thinking about the convenience of future queers when they were calling themselves bi. They were just living their lives and building their communities and being bisexual.
And here's the other thing--- it's not actually that confusing, once you get down to the bones of it. Sure, the history of the word is a mess, but the current definition is straightforward.
Bisexual means attraction to two or more genders (up to and including all). And pansexual means attraction to all genders. That's it, those are the two descriptions. One is "two-to-all," and one is "all."
So if youre into zero genders or only one, then you're neither pan nor bi.
If youre into more than one but less than all genders, then bisexual is probably the right term for you.
If you're into all genders, then you could be either pan or bi, and you get to pick the label that fits you best. The one that sounds best in your mouth or that fits best across your shoulders, or based on which flag you like best, or which description vibes with you more. Or don't pick at all, and just use the two terms interchangably. Plenty of people do that.
But to claim that bi means two and therefore can only be applied strictly to male and female attraction, and to no genders outside of that binary, is to completely misunderstand the current meaning of the word, and to completely erase the long and varied history it has and the people it's represented for more than 160 years.
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