"I'm dead." "Condolences." @erika-is-real - Tumblr Blog

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plot twist: i actually died many years ago this is just a queue

tarynel

What’s your fantasy?

pleasestopandrew

I wake up, my debt is all paid off, my bank account is full, my relationships with my family are healthy, and I’m able to travel anywhere in the world.

sophiamariabaeks

reblog for this ultimate fantasy life to come true

youmake-kittyscared

I don’t want a sugar daddy but can I have like a sugar auntie? Just a sweet old woman who gives me money cus she knows I’m going through it and she believes in me and her grandkids don’t ever call so she writes me in her will.

allofthemwitches-deactivated202

oh to be a nun in 1350 enjoying quiet time and gardening and having lots of lesbian sex and then dying at the ripe old age of 36

radgoblin

Life expectancy statistics measure the average age of death. Because infant/childhood mortality was so incredibly high until recently, it really dragged down that average. If you exclude infant/childhood mortality from your statistic, you’ll see that humans (that survive childhood) have consistently lived into their 70s, meaning if you were a woman that survived childhood and never had to go through pregnancy, you may well get a good 50+ years of lesbian sex and gardening!

221cbakerstreet

Reblog for a good 50+ years of lesbian sex and gardening

copperbadge

Shout out to all my lesbian gardeners from the 14th century and onwards.

permissiontospeakfreely1994

Relatable.

hyrude

this is the text of good fortune, reblog in 60 seconds and $1200 will spontaneously materialize in your bank account🙏🙌💪🏻😤

ice-block

The “I don’t have 2020 vision” meme has gotten progressively funnier the closer we get to 2020 because when it started it was like “not knowing what you’re doing in 5 years? understandable” but now it’s like “I don’t know what I’m doing in 5 hours”