Monterey Bay Aquarium
JVL
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Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
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Xuebing Du
tannertan36
Product Placement
wallacepolsom
art blog(derogatory)
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Mike Driver
d e v o n
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Kaledo Art
noise dept.
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Cosimo Galluzzi
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@escxffier
The greatest dishes are very simple.
🍴Indie Escoffier from Genshin Impact 🍴Semi-Selective 🍴Plenty o' memes, shitposts and metas. 🍴Crossover, AU & OC Friendly 🍴Mun is 27 🍴Main blog over at @ancientforgcd 🍴Written by Goose
Rules About Promo
Inbox Call.
Meeting a celebrity was not turning out how Lyza assumed it would. The chef was quickly getting under her skin, and not in a way she could comprehend. Lyza just hoped she didn't look as flushed as she felt while trying to figure out if Escoffier was just hardcore flirting with her or teasing her for fun.
"Just..." Obediently, she took a seat as requested and shrugged nonchalantly. "Fish and chips are fine. And lemonade, if you guys have any. But if not, that's fine too." A dessert sounded good, but she didn't want to order too much.
"A-and I'm not looking at you like that! But... actually, can you make a coffee bavarois for after? That's it."
Escoffier smiled, not wide, not showy. Just a subtle curl at the edge of her mouth, like she'd found the exchange quietly amusing. “Fish and chips, lemonade, and a coffee bavarois.” She repeated, setting her hands on her hips. “Practical, nostalgic, and just pretentious enough to suggest taste.”
She tilted her head slightly, smile still intact. “And don’t worry. I’ve been looked at worse. Usually by critics. Sometimes by mirrors.” Then she turned toward the kitchen, voice light but deliberate. “I’ll make sure the bavarois is strong. That way, if the flirting accusation wasn’t a complete accident…we’ll have time to revisit it between bites.”
Chef, have you ever used your own bodily fluids for seasoning? For a special kick?
“…Absolutely not.” Escoffier’s tone flattened immediately. “Flavor is built on balance, chemistry, and respect for the craft, not shock value. I don’t need to resort to biohazards to make an impression.”
A pause. Then, much colder, like the Cryo element itself. “And if that was meant to be a joke, consider this your only warning. My knives are sterile. My patience isn’t.”
Does Escoffier get freaky with her tail?
Escoffier gave a slow blink. No change in posture. No shift in tone. Just silence and then. “It’s a prosthetic support mechanism designed for culinary multitasking, not...whatever you’re implying.”
She turned back to her prep station, voice sharp now. “Please keep your fantasies separate from my workspace. Hygiene violations aside, I have soufflés that collapse with less pressure than that question.”
Escoffier is handed a piece of cheese. It should be... fascinating, no?
Escoffier accepted the cheese between two fingers like she was inspecting a rare mineral. No immediate reaction - just a quiet calculation behind her eyes.
“Hm. Soft-ripened. Cow’s milk. Washed rind?” She brought it closer. One inhale, short and measured. “Faint ammonia note. Matured at just above cellar temperature...risky, but intentional.”
She took a small bite. Chewed once. “Texturally inconsistent. The fat distribution’s slightly off, but the fermentation was daring. There’s personality here. Not refinement, but boldness.” She looked up, expression even. “I like that. Cheese that knows what it’s trying to be. Most people don’t.”
She was about to cremate it? Really? She looked over the steak, and then glanced up at Escoffier. Meeting eyes briefly before looking back at the food she was attempting to make. She wasn't quite sure she liked the metaphor of taste of regret since she had little trouble eating her own food (although the food at Good Hunter was a lot better). Even if admittedly she had to sometimes take extra effort to force herself not to waste it since it didn't exactly taste wonderful by any means of the word.
"Wait does that mean I can't salt it now? And how do I baste properly?" That wasn't quite a word she was used to...ugh everything with cooking was just so complicated even with step-by-step instructions. Which apparently according to the chef here she had skipped a step?
She must be a super impressive chef if she can spot that Amber had missed something without being here for the full process... but it did make her feel a little guilty being distracted.
"Ah sorry, of course I want to learn! I don't want to disappoint Jean if she put in a lot of effort to get you here. Plus it'd be very disrespectful to you as well." So...
"But if you don't just pour it into the pan...what is the steps to making garlic sauce? Will I need a pot for it? I didn't bring one...I guess I got a water container but I don't think that'll work..." She didn't quite realize that these questions weren't the right ones in the slightest.
Escoffier let out a short breath, not quite a sigh. She reached over, adjusted the heat, and gave the pan a light swirl to distribute the oil better. “It’s not about tools.” She said. “It’s about knowing when to stop guessing.”
She picked up a clove of garlic, gave it a quick smash with the flat of her knife, and dropped it into a small pan she had brought along. “You use what you have. If there’s no proper pot, any clean metal container will do. Butter goes in first, low heat. Garlic after. Don’t rush it or you’ll burn the whole thing.”
Her eyes flicked to Amber, pausing. “And you can salt now. but it won’t save it. It’ll just remind you next time.”
She folded her arms, letting the garlic cook slowly beside her. “If you want to learn, good. Then learn properly. Ask questions, sure. But don’t spin in circles while the food dies on the heat. Pick one step, focus on it, then move to the next.”
Then a brief nod. “Jean sent you here to improve, not impress. So stop worrying about disappointing her and start paying attention.”
Inbox Call
@luxiingzhe from X
Escoffier watched the unfolding scene with quiet amusement, the corner of her mouth twitching up just slightly. She waited until Paimon’s declaration had finished echoing through the air before she responded, unhurried, composed.
“Well then, I suppose I’m in excellent hands.” Escoffier spoke. “Or rather, mouths.”
She moved a small tray forward, revealing three neatly arranged bites. “This one has a hint of Jueyun chili, so pace yourself. The second is my take on a Mondstadt classic, adjusted for the texture. And the last...well. I’ll let you guess.”
She looked between the two of them, eyes settling on Lumine for a moment longer. “Of course, if either of you dies from the flavor, I’ll take it as a compliment.”
A pause, then she added, “Paimon first?”
Amber briefly looked down at the steak upon hearing the question of if she had salted it after cooking. Was she supposed to do it beforehand? She had expected the salt to simply run off the steak and remain in the pan but she didn't doubt that the other knew what she was talking about.
"Well I'm not quite finished yet so I wouldn't call it after." She didn't feel the other side was quite hot enough, so she just had to turn up the heat a bit...she thinks. Maybe she should double-check the recipe. She hadn't seen any mention of grain in it...was she supposed to add that? Was flour enough?
"Ah! Wait I got step-by-step instructions...I think I was on step four... or was it three...but I think I rotated it..." She may have misunderstood which axis to turn the steak.
She got slightly distracted by some birds flying past. But she brought up a piece of paper, rugged on some sides, and read through it. Completely ignoring the steak that was currently firmly placed on the pan over her fire. Lost in reading... ' She got slightly distracted by some birds flying past. But she brought up a piece of paper, rugged on some sides, and read through it. Completely ignoring the steak that was currently firmly placed on the pan over her fire. Lost in reading...
Smoke rising, which it seemed either the Outrider was accustomed to or didn't notice.
"Oh it was step six! Add garlic sauce..." She then paused and looked up at Escoffier again, still not moving the steak in any way so it just kept being burnt without her noticing.
"That's just adding butter and garlic together right? I've not made that before...you probably know more than me on this so should I just pour both right into the pan?" She asked in genuine curiosity, if Jean had taken time to get a chef to help her learn she'd not waste the chance.
Escoffier said nothing at first. She just watched.
Then she stepped forward, pulled the pan off the heat with a single motion, and let the silence hang for a second longer than it needed to. The steak kept sizzling in protest.
“You were about to cremate it.” She said flatly. “Which is fine if that’s your goal. Some people like the taste of regret.”
She grabbed a clean spatula, nudged the steak with it, and gave Amber a glance. “Salt goes on before. Helps the crust form. Locks moisture in. You don’t want it sitting in a hot bath of oil like it owes you money.”
She reached for the garlic and butter. “Garlic sauce is butter, garlic, and not pouring like a lunatic. You add it near the end and baste.” Her tone didn’t shift, still calm, still measured, but it was clear she was already rewriting Amber’s whole process in her head.
“Step six.” She muttered, glancing at the paper. “You skipped half of step three.”
She didn’t say it to be cruel. Just honest. Then, with a slight tilt of her head: “Want to actually learn, or just wing it until Jean gives up and pretends this was all a good idea?”
"Compliments? But I didn't..." Lyza felt her face heat up as Escoffier looked her up and down. Was the chef flirting with her? She wasn't exactly subtle, what with her eyes looking up and down her body. No, between that and her sweet words, Escoffier was definitely flirting, but it was almost like she was ogling Lyza as well.
"I uh..." Now Lyza couldn't look the other woman in the eye. "I don't really know... I mean, I just heard the food is good down here, so like, you know..." She shrugged and folded her arms. "I-I don't know, I just wanted lunch! What do you make anyway?"
Escoffier leaned against the counter, arms loosely crossed. “You stare too long. Not that I mind. Just pointing it out.”
She turned to grab a pan, calm and methodical. No showmanship, just someone who’d done this a thousand times. “You came all this way and didn’t even ask what’s on the menu. That’s bold. Or naive.” Her tone made it hard to tell if she was teasing or not.
The oil hit the pan with a hiss. She didn’t flinch. “You want something quick, or something real?” She glanced over at Lyza, eyes narrowing slightly. “Don’t say ‘whatever’s fine.’ That’s how you end up with disappointment.”
She didn’t wait for an answer before moving again, pulling ingredients like she already knew what Lyza would pick. “Sit. I don’t serve people who hover.”
Then, casually, “...and stop looking at me like I’m going to bite. If I wanted to, I would’ve done it already.”
Unprompted ask. - @escxffier sent:
"I heard you're one of the Melusines that doesn't have too much experience with human cooking?" A simple question from Escoffier. "Would you like me to prepare something grand for you to taste?"
The Melusine was a bit taken aback when this person knew about her lack of experience for trying human cooking. She had no idea who she even was.
And then her stomach started to grumble.
"Y-yes, if that's alright...?" Mare softly responded with a little blush on her face, feeling a bit embarrassed.
Escoffier’s expression softened - just slightly. Not enough to drop her composure, but enough to shift from chef to host.
“Of course it’s alrigh.,” The chef said, already rolling up her sleeves. “I’d be more concerned if you didn’t say yes. First meals leave a lasting impression, and I don’t intend for yours to be forgettable.”
She gestured toward a nearby counter, already lined with ingredients. “Sit wherever you’d like. No need to be nervous. You’re not here to pass a test - just to eat. And maybe." Escoffier added with a small smile. "To discover what warmth tastes like when it’s made by hand.”
@wxndswept
Escoffier didn’t blink and simply apologized. "Sorry, slip of tongue."
Then she took the praise in and slowly responded. “…I’m flattered.” She muttered, arms crossing as she eyed Lyza like she was a mislabeled spice jar. “But if you’re going to toss compliments around like garnish, at least clarify whether you’re talking about me or the food. One I serve on a plate. The other doesn’t come with sides.”
She tilted her head slightly, tone cooling.
“Now, any idea on what you were planning to eat?"
@escxffier
A chef. Amber wasn't sure who the chef was, but she could tell that her newfound company was that. All while her focus thus drifted from her halfburnt steak to Escoffier.
"Jean set aside time for that?" How thoughtful of her, though it did raise question about that she was possibly adding a bit more to her table by doing so and the possibility of her being overworked...but perhaps it was a sign of the opposite. If Jean had the time to worry about something small like this, that meant she was in a pretty good position!
"I've improved a lot lately..." (Not really) "...I even brought some salt with me to help improve the taste a bit this time."
Salting the partly charred and partly soft steak (well one side was charred, other was not). It'd help a lot, she had been told it was an important step of making it taste good so she trusted it to be the case.
Escoffier gave the steak a glance. Not long. Just enough.
“…You salted it after cooking?” She asked, more curious than condescending. “I see.”
She didn’t reach for a fork yet. Instead, she adjusted her gloves and folded her hands. “Salting post-sear can work, but it depends on the cut, the grain, and your cooking goal. If you’re aiming for recovery, though…fair strategy. Damage control is a skill too.”
Her tone stayed even. There was no mocking, only fact in it. After a brief pause, she continued. “Show me how you handled the pan next time. I’ll make sure your seasoning doesn’t have to apologize for the heat.”
”It wasn't an accident, was it? Someone tried to kill you." (Iris)
Concerned Sentences, Vol. 10$
"No. The inconsistencies were too precise. Temperature, timing, even ingredient placement; all deliberately off. That wasn’t carelessness. Someone intended for me not to leave that kitchen alive."
𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙻𝚘𝚗𝚐 𝙳𝚊𝚛𝚔 || 𝚂𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚌𝚎 𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚜 a collection of lines from The Long Dark a video game where a geomagnetic storm has knocked out the power and sent the Island of Great Bear, perhaps even the world, in to a wintery apocalypse.
𝙴𝚙 1: 𝙳𝚘 𝙽𝚘𝚝 𝙶𝚘 𝙶𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚕𝚎
“Those were better days.”
“Wha… what are you doing here?”
“That is not good.”
“Power’s gone. Whole electric system is fried.”
“Are you gonna help me or not?”
“I could probably climb that.”
“I’ve been looking for you.”
“Someone’s been here recently..”
“Hello? Anyone out there!?”
“Hm, this whole area looks like it’s been abandoned for a while.”
“Listen, could you maybe point that gun somewhere else?”
“Make the wrong move, say the wrong thing you will see how good a shot I am.”
“A name takes on it’s own life, such that at one point the name becomes the thing it belongs to.”
“You’re sitting here with a rifle in your hands, you expecting trouble?”
“Trouble? Ha! Trouble found me.”
“They thought they were safe, they were wrong.”
“There is always hope.”
“Everyone thinks being old makes you weak, but they underestimated me.”
“This goes deeper than stillness, it feels like the moments before the world goes to sleep.”
“We’re just the last ones left awake to notice it.”
“You look weary, come warm yourself by the fire.”
“I’m here to witness the passing of an age.”
‘You’ll have to live with what remains.”
“I’m not sure anything will ever be back to ‘normal.’”
“Go safely, and good luck to you.”
“You have no idea how stubborn I am.”
“This new world is for the strong to survive.”
“You have a kind heart, but it’s a heavy one.”
“This what you do? Hang around campfire and…share wisdom?”
“These are confusing times, let me see if I can help you make sense of them.”
“We’ve sinned. Now we’re paying the price.”
“We’ll have to choose how far we go to survive.” “It’s not for me to pass judgement on.”
“Let’s hope you hold on to your merciful ways, and the new world doesn’t just grid you to dust.”
“Good luck. Enjoy your apocalypse.”
“You keep your luck. I have a feeling you’re going to need it.”
“Shoot the damn thing!”
I did this !
Send one of the following for my muse to tell about :
🍳 - A recipe they're great at cooking
🎣 - An accomplishment they're proud of
🥇 - A victory they remember well
👍 - A time they helped someone
😢 - An action they regret having done
💍 - A precious thing they got and keep
🕳️ - A precious thing they lost
🔗 - A crime they did
💔 - A heart they broke
🍬 - A thing they did as a kid
