Esoterria @esoterria - Tumblr Blog

captainsnoop-deactivated2020041

man

the creators of superman really named a small town “smallville” and a big city “metropolis” didn’t they

grandmapuncher

I mean they made a superhero named superman so what do you expect

writhe

i have a hill to die on real quick

writhe

phrases like “you don’t owe anyone anything” and “relationships aren’t transactional” have the power to be used in ways that are very backwards and harmful

for example, no you don’t owe anyone anything in that if some creep is trying to get with you, you can block him without feeling bad. you don’t owe kindness to people who are transphobic or racist or bigoted.

but, you can’t use this as an excuse to fuck over people who have helped you. “you don’t owe anyone anything” isn’t an excuse to allow yourself to forget compassion and basic empathy, it isn’t an excuse for you to be an asshole just because you find it easier to be one

relationships aren’t transactional in that if your partner does something nice for you, you are indebted to them. they do these things because they love you; it is their choice to express love through these gestures

but they are transactional in that you both actively need to be putting time and care into the relationship. ignoring the dynamic of one person caring too much (and putting in excessive (emotional an literal) work and labor) while the other does nothing isn’t healthy. one person can’t solely take and the other person can’t solely give- that’s dangerous, and you can’t put the bandaid of “this isn’t transactional” over a relationship that is draining you in all capacities

i’m tired of seeing these things being misconstrued and used as an excuse to hurt people, while framing it as a way of taking care of yourself

sophisticatedfangirling

it’s funny how the same phrase you can say to set yourself free from an abuser can be used by said abuser to excuse their behaviour.

context matters.

omegaboner

a girl in one of my classes sent out an email saying “you’ll be having a furry classmate this semester” and my heart stopped but she was talking about her service dog

prokopetz

I’m not saying I’m definitely an NPC, but if I am a protagonist, the game I’m starring in is probably free-to-play.

winterwombat

Makes sense:

I can only do something useful once every few hours

Ads are everywhere

The pacing seems designed to be deliberately frustrating

A lot of the hassle would go away if had a ton of money

unclefather

doktorgirlfriend

Brain: You’re a horrible, worthless, garbage person, and your life is going nowhere but to hell.

Me: I don’t know what the fuck you expect me to do about that at 11PM, my dude.

lacapitaine-deactivated20120131

terriamon

skajador

lovedroughts

asgardreid-deactivated20180407

The only thing that’d be more potentially embarrassing than my internet history would be my calculator history, a chronicle of all the painfully simple math I couldn’t manage to do in my head.

wolvehipsss

onlinecounsellingcollege

You have to get to the point where your mood doesn’t shift based on the insignificant actions of someone else.

Unknown (via onlinecounsellingcollege)

twitterlols

askjfaskdjd

ingridverse

Do not punish the behaviour you want to see

I mean, it seems pretty obvious when you put it like that, right?

But how many families, when an introvert sibling or child makes an effort to socialize, snarkily say, “So, you’ve decided to join us”?

Or when someone does something they’ve had trouble doing, say, “Why can’t you do that all the time?” (Happened to me, too often.)

Or any sentence containing the word “finally”.

If someone makes a step, a small step, in a direction you want to encourage, encourage it. Don’t complain about how it’s not enough. Don’t bring up previous stuff. Encourage it.

Because I swear to fucking god there is nothing more soul-killing, more motivation-crushing, than struggling to succeed and finding out that success and failure are both punished.

businessofwomen

Stop asking little girls if they have boyfriends Stop referring to the boys that little girls are friends with as their “little boyfriends” Stop telling little girls they’re going to have boyfriends or be “boy crazy” Stop raising children on heteronormativity and let them be children