"Not for money, not for views, not for anyone but myself."
Hello, I'm Twistedtalkings!! Well, not anymore... I realized I was obsessed with views, and writing became a chore, so I started a new channel to write for myself! Call me Estrell (or Aster, if we're close).
This channel is mostly made so I could write about my OCs!! I'll make a profile for them later (maybe). Tags are #tbttu, #tssc, and #twst. OHH I also take twst asks! If what you send is interesting, I'll do it!!
(Banner is by @/hugsohugs)
Table of Contents
-Twisted wonderland Fanfics (Asks open, but I can reject)
-My Stories (The Bonds That Tie Us, Two Sides of the Same Coin, A Regular Fantasy Harem, etc.)
-Random writing (writing prompts or otherwise)
Asking Rules
There are three different flavors you could ask for in writing twst fics! Canon-compliant, Romantic, and Yandere. Please specify which type you want in the fic. (Very much twst, but feel free to request my OCs too!!)
I have simple boundaries, which are, please respect my religion (Christianity/Born Again) while on my blog, and that's all right now whoops.
Also, no suicide jokes. It's a very sensitive topic for me.
No flirting with me please!! Especially in DMs! I AM A MINOR!!! However, platonic flirting/nicknames are fine (as long as I start it).
Please don't talk about war with me!! I get very philosophical/obsessed with it, and I'm currently working on not doing that.
Minors welcome here. I've seen lots of yandere fic blogs that say minor dni, and as a teenager who hasn't yet reached her debut, I feel super sad about it. So yeah, minors welcome!
DNI LIST
○Those with church/religious trauma, specifically Christianity. More for you than me, since I add bible verses to each of my posts. Feel free to block!
○ Those who are rude about Christ in my blog. My God is very important to me, so if you got something to say, don't say it here. Or I'll block you.
Edit: Also, those who disregard my boundaries in any way.
You now know everything you need to know to ask/request! Now, personal stuff! About me, the one running this thing!
My alias is Mayo! I am a binibini (maiden) from the Philippines! I am currently a not-yet 18 year old. I am quite excited about my debut ngl.
Other than Twst, I am very fond of manga! I've read tbhk and wotakoi! I'm also excited for "The flower that blooms with dignity" anime adaptation! I also love musicals, like Six and Hamilton. Very excited for Epic the Musical's release too! (I also code)
Outside of tumblr, I am a high-school student (middle school, by Japan's standards), who wants to spread the word of God! That's why I add bible verses on each of my posts! My dream is to one day be a Voice Actor in America, while also doing accountant work. I also one day want to live in Japan!
My main account on tumblr is called @/everydaytwstsimp. Its mainly for reblogs though. I also have @/twistedtalking, which is my twst roleplaying account, where I roleplay as most of the students. (More info on that account's pinned post).
⟢ "I know you don't feel it. I've known for a long time. I just haven't figured out how to stop yet."
⟢ "You talk about her and your whole face changes and I have to just sit there and watch that happen."
⟢ "I keep showing up because some part of me thinks if I'm just there enough, present enough, good enough — and I know. I know how that sounds."
⟢ "I'm not waiting for you. I'm just not moving on yet. There's a difference I keep telling myself."
⟢ "You hug me the same way you hug everyone and I have to remind myself of that every single time."
⟢ "I know every little thing about you and you don't even know my favorite color and I let that happen. I did that to myself."
⟢ "I don't want to ruin what we have. What you have. What I have is something else entirely."
⟢ "You called me your best friend and I smiled and said yeah and went home and sat in my car for forty minutes."
⟢ "I think what kills me most is that you're not even doing anything wrong."
⟢ "I've talked myself out of telling you so many times I've lost count. Tonight almost wasn't one of them."
⟢ "You looked at me once — really looked — and I built an entire future out of three seconds. I know. I know."
⟢ "I'm happy for you. Genuinely, actually, from the bottom of this stupid inconvenient heart, happy for you."
⟢ "I keep thinking I'll get over it. Six months ago I thought I was over it. Here we are."
⟢ "You deserve someone who loves you like this. I just wish it could've been me."
⟢ "I'm going to tell you and it's going to change everything and I've decided I'd rather have the truth than keep protecting a version of us that only exists for me."
⟢ "Don't be kind about it. I can't handle you being kind about it."
⟢ "I think I fell in love with the way you made me feel about myself. That's a complicated thing to grieve."
⟢ "You're not mine and you were never going to be mine and I think some part of me knew that from the beginning."
⟢ "I loved you quietly for so long it started to feel like a personality trait."
⟢ "I'm stepping back. Not because I want to. Because I have to start wanting things that are actually possible."
⟢ "The worst part isn't loving you. The worst part is how easy it is. How completely natural and effortless and pointless."
⟢ "I hope one day someone loves you the way I did. I hope you notice it that time."
⟢ "I'm letting it go now. I'm putting it down. I'm going to keep telling myself that until it's true."
⟢ "You'll never know. I think that's the kindest thing I've ever done for either of us."
⟢ "I don't regret loving you. I regret how long I made myself small to keep doing it."
I feel like Carlisle has to have some extreme guilt and anxiety about practicing medicine for so long. He's over 300 years old. Medical practice has changed a ton in those years. I feel like he would have constant guilt about his treatment of his patients which he later found out was harming them. In addition to that, I think he would have a lot of anxiety about what he's doing now, and if he'll find out it was harmful later.
For example, how much cocaine did he prescribe? How many patients smoked and died from lung cancer before he found out smoking was harmful? How many lobotomies did he recommend? How many blood transfusions were for the wrong blood type? How much harm did he cause in 300 years because he didn't know and trusted what was supposedly the cutting edge of medicine?
I don't know if this concept is explored in the books but I think it's interesting. I don't think Carlisle is some all-knowing doctor who knew what practices would be found harmful and if he did he didn't spread the word to prevent more harm. Carlisle lived through Victorian era medicine, arguably one of the most bat shit insane and harmful eras of medicine. Carlisle is also practicing in the US and Europe, aka Western countries. Western countries have historically been behind the curve when it comes to medicine. The most well-known example being c sections, something practiced safely and successfully in Africa for hundreds of years and only beginning to see success and introduction in the mid to late 1700s. Western doctors also only started regularly washing their hands in the late 1800s and 1900s 😐
heartbreaking, the boring twink is the more self-aware, responsible adult among the dark world leaders. he didn't threaten to kill any kids.
edit: this post keeps getting notes somehow so i need to correct myself. flowery isnt even boring hes just genuinely goated. what love and care do to a dark world leader fr.
Why Flowery is one of Deltarune's most tragic characters.
(Spoilers for all of chapter 5's main route.)
I don't think enough people are talking about just how heartbreaking of a character Flowery really is, and the rest of the flowers too on some level.
I get that we love to joke and make memes about him, even hate on him a little just for fun, but I want to see more serious analysis of this guy, because his story is one of the most poignantly tragic in the entire game.
So I'm gonna say my piece about him, this will be a bit ramble-y but I hope it gets my point across.
Flowery is aware of the prophecy and what it means. While it's unclear exactly how, I think we can assume that at some point Asgore might've read the story to his flowers, maybe Gerson's Lord of the Hammer books? But regardless of how, we know that Flowery is fully aware of the prophecy because of his interactions with Ralsei.
So, from the moment the dark world is created, from the moment he gains sentience, Flowery knows that sooner or later the fountain will be sealed, and his world will end. From the start, everything he does is with this fact in mind.
And what does he do with this time he knows is limited? He tries to make Asgore happy.
He's very misguided about it, sure, but he so obviously genuinely wants Asgore to be happy, he genuinely wants him and his fellow flowers to be like a new family for him, because they all grew their entire lives up until now hearing Asgore's stories get progressively more sad, intimately understanding how Asgore's life is falling apart.
It's funny, as self-centered as he may come off, he spends vanishingly little of his time as a sentient being focused on himself, instead he makes it all about how Asgore feels, he makes his entire world revolve around Asgore, because even if he knows deep down that he can't be there forever, he can at least TRY to make Asgore happy in this moment.
And he knows who's gonna do it, too. He knows exactly who the people destined to destroy his world and cast him and his fellow flowers back into unconsciousness are, the heroes of the prophecy, Kris, Susie, and Ralsei.
And what does he try to do? He tries to help them, too. While yes, he's antagonistic towards the Fun Gang, he makes it clear in his pre-boss dialogue that he only acted that way because it was what he thought would make Ralsei actually realize that his mentalities were messed up, he wants Ralsei to know freedom, to realize he's allowed to be happy.
Does this excuse him bullying Ralsei? Well, that's really up to you. I think what he was trying to do came from the right place, and in many ways, it even worked, but there may have been a better way to make Ralsei have the realizations that he wanted him to without being a massive asshole. I don't think he was clearly in the wrong OR in the right here, much like in his actions towards Asgore.
But still, he became the exact person he believed Ralsei needed. He knew these people were going to destroy everything he'd built, or at least that they were going to try, and Ralsei was the most dedicated of them all, and he STILL tried to help!
And finally, when it did come time for him to stand against them in combat, he did. Even though he knew the prophecy had unfolded exactly as written so far, even though he knew he had next to no chance of actual meaningful victory, he still tried. He still fought for his world. He still stood alongside all of his friends and family and TRIED.
But y'know what he didn't do? What he wouldn't do, that every other deltarune arc villain did? He wouldn't kill them. He won't kill the heroes, even to save his world, even to save everything he loves, because at his heart, Flowery is principled. He won't cross that line, he won't kill three actual children, even if he probably has better motivations to do so than, like, any other previous arc villain.
But by not killing them, by letting the heroes try over and over again, he knows that sooner or later, they'll win. He's heard the stories, he knows they won't give up.
When Kris doesn't get up at the end of their fight, when he realizes they might be actually seriously hurt, Flowery is shocked and very obviously realizes he took it too far.
And then Asgore tells Flowery exactly what he fears most: he could never genuinely be happy there, he was just playing along with Flowery to learn more about the dark worlds. Asgore did genuinely think Flowery's attempts to make him happy were sweet, but he also intimately understands the dangers of the dark world, as perfectly demonstrated by Kris getting hurt even when Flowery didn't mean for them to.
So, the heroes say their goodbyes and go to seal the fountain, and Flowery knows his world is going to end, just like the prophecy said.
And then, finally, the Roaring Knight takes Asgore.
And even after being told to his face that Asgore was just playing along throughout it all, even after KNOWING that he and his fantasy world would NEVER be enough for Asgore, Flowery still wants to help him more than anything.
So he fights the Roaring Knight, a fight he cannot possibly win because the heroes are fated to clash with it in the end, and... He dies.
(Alright, we don't know for sure if he's dead. I suspect it might depend on player actions in future chapters, perhaps you need to make sure to go back to the flower shop to take care of the flowers while Asgore's gone, but at least for the moment, he is most likely dead. The scene is played like a character death, and thematically, that's what it is.)
And you know what he says while he's dying?
He comments on how useless flowers are. He says how he knows he could never help in any real way, literally parroting the exact purpose talk and lack of self worth he tried to discourage in Ralsei, because when you put aside all the bravado, Flowery has many of the same insecurities.
It's Ralsei who refutes this, telling him that he and his fellow flowers serve an important and beautiful purpose, in a beautiful semi-reversal of their dynamic up until this point... But it's still ultimately about innate purpose, something darkners can't seem to escape.
Flowery can only hope his words were enough, that maybe, just maybe, he might've made Ralsei think. He might've prompted some level of prominent change, because even if he does survive as a flower in the light world, Ralsei still more or less outlives him once his world is gone.
But you know what caps it all off? What REALLY makes it so tragic?
Flowery's plan never could've worked, even if he had defeated the heroes and kept his fountain.
Because the flowers are between lightners and darkners.
It's established all the way back in chapter one that food and water consumed in the dark world won't actually sustain someone from the light world, after all, it's not "real." So what about the flowers?
While, as Ralsei says, they need to be taken care of. They need water and sunlight, otherwise they'll wither. If there is a dark world in the flower shop, they can't be taken care of.
So, ultimately, Flowery's world was always doomed, prophecy or not. If it had stuck around, he and the other flowers would've all eventually died, with no one to take care of them, no water, no sunlight, nothing.
It was always a dream, beautiful but temporary.
But... At least we got to see it. At least we got to watch their dreams, to be there, to learn who all seven of them are as people, to understand them, and ultimately, at least we got to say goodbye.
Deltarune really is a story where every single ship is emotionally devastating, like
Krusie is like “I have barely known you for three days but I would happily die if it meant I could protect you. I regret every second we spent thinking we hated each other, because now that I see the real you, it’s the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. You are the one person I can truly rely on, even if I have to keep the most devastating of secrets from you that will bury me in the end. I see you, and I love you.”
Kriselle is like “I haven’t had a conversation with you last more than five minutes in years and I can still remember every word we’ve said to each other. We were the closest two people could possibly be without literally sharing a body and now I don’t even know how to talk to you. I pretend like you don’t mean anything to me because admitting how much I still love you terrifies me to the core, and I feel insane guilt every day over the fact I broke us apart. I hope one day you can forgive me for being a terrible friend.”
Suselle is like “You are everything that I am not that I so desperately want to be. You hide your true self away under these layers of facade but I can see the sparkling gem underneath and it is such a beautiful sight, I don’t think I am worthy to behold it. I want to steal every moment I can with you and I will fight to do so even if fate itself attempts to tears us apart. I don’t know if I will ever deserve you but I will still reach out to you, and I will find a way to keep you.”
Susei/Ralsusie is like “We are polar opposites in every way I can imagine and it only brings us closer together. You complete me in ways I did not know I needed to be completed. When everything and everyone told me that I did not matter, you told me I am important not in spite of but because of who I am. I will take every blow and every injury if it means protecting your smile and keeping you safe. I will even destroy my own heart if it means giving you the happiness that I know for a fact you deserve.”
Kralsei is like “What if you met the person that was literally made for you, and that all the world was pushing you together, but there was something wrong? What if the person you were born to fall in love with was an unflattering, bitter depiction of who you are and who you used to be? What if your honest to God Soulmate was keeping secrets and undermining everything you have dedicated your life to do, not out of cruelty or malicious intent, but because it was genuinely what they needed to do, what they were always going to do? And what if, in spite of all of that, you fell in love with each other anyways?”
Kerdly is like “I don’t know if I can call you my friend or say I care about you, but you still define so much of who I am, intentionally or otherwise. I don’t have many people who would give a shit if I live or die, and I don’t know if you’re one of them, but I still need you to be in my life. I will fight you, I will hurt you, I will defy everything you want if I absolutely have to, but when the chips are down I will do whatever it takes to keep you safe. I don’t know if I love you, I don’t even know if I like you, but I still need you, whatever that even means.”
Dessriel…I mean, do I even have to explain that one? Whatever happened, however things went, you already know.
ANY adult Holiday/Dreemurr ship is like “We were once something special, closer than anyone could possibly imagine. My home was your home, and yours was mine. Even outside of what the world might accept, we were one family. Then everything went wrong, and now we’ve fallen apart. My life is crumbling down around me in ways I didn’t even think were possible, and yet I still care about you. I still love you, even as we rapidly approach the end, and the world crumbles down around me. I don’t know if we’re still a family, but you will always be my home.”
1.Incredible deep and detailed narrative themes. The parallels that seem to hit just right, the narrative foils that they can be to each other, the intricate dynamic that's both extremely complex and easily understood. The juxtaposition between something that's harsh and undoubtedly toxic, with the softer undertones, the parts where you read in-between the lines and find a mutual feeling of loneliness from both parts, their intrinsic understanding of each other comes from the mere fact that they're each others mirrored reflections and shadows. In the end both sides will be together forever, and you as an audience can clearly see their tragedy laid out before in a path that blurs pure anguish and tender romance
thinking abt grace becoming fluent in eridian. thinking about eridian as an information-dense and layered language. thinking about the ability to create new words out of layered sounds and the way you can quickly describe a complicated relationship in eridian. grace practicing on his organ for speaking eridian, sounding out the tones for boss/leader and friend/companion and murderer until they blend into a single word.
and that’s how eva stratt gets her eridian name, which she will never know.
What about Pomni!!! That’s right. I’ve become a Pomni lover over the course of this show. At first she was always just freaking out and she kinda served her purpose as asking all the questions for us viewers but then she slowly became her own person trying to make do with the situation she was put in. She’s not an extreme caricature in any way like the rest of the group, she’s a delicate middle ground where she’s free to be possibly the most human of them all. She’s not brooding like zooble- or crying like Gangle- forced positivity like Ragatha- douche who attacks everyone like Jax- or a goofball like Kinger.
She forms her opinions based on new information like us. Like an average person, not a caricature like most might see her as just because of the pilot. She’s caring, curious, confused.. she can laugh when something amuses her even if it’s Jax.. she’s forgiving, she’s understanding, she observes the world around herself with an almost unbiased mind. She at first seemed like a scared character to be comforted by Ragatha but she is also the comforter- like she was with Gangle and Gumigoo.
Since TADC recently ended, I thought I'd talk a bit about how I discovered the series, and some of my opinions. There are a few spoilers in this.
I found out about TADC through Reddit. I saw some of the characters, like Jax and Gangle, and thought their designs were appealing. All I knew was the meme of Pomni staring into the camera at the dinner table. I also thought the series had an interesting name. Around two weeks after it came out, the pilot got recommended to me on YouTube, so I watched it. I didn't see it as the type of show I'd be into (I watched anime at the time), but I enjoyed it nonetheless.
Episodes 5 and 6 were when I really got into the series. Episode 5 had to be my favorite episode, along with Episode 9. I loved the Lightning Round and the lore we got. There were plenty of fun moments, and it made me look forward to more. I loved Jax and Pomni's friendship in Episode 6, and Jax's betrayal was interesting to watch. It made me wonder about them more.
Jax was a character that stood out to me from the beginning. I liked them in the pilot because I saw them as funny and entertaining. I knew their voice sounded familiar, but I didn't figure it out until the next day when I realized Michael Kovach also voiced Angel Dust in the Hazbin Hotel pilot. I liked learning more about them as the series went on, especially in Episode 9 (I knew it would be the episode where Jax is finally explained). You can hate me if you want for this, but Jax being a trans woman wasn't obvious to me. However, it does make a lot of sense. When I first saw Episode 9 in theaters, I interpreted the bow scene as Jax developing a crush on Ribbit. They did get pretty close during the time they were friends. Now, having watched Episode 9 again and thinking back on things, it makes sense. Jax would've never admitted to liking feminine things, including the maid dress. They always put up a front, and seeing that facade crack over time made me appreciate them more. Jax may be a bad person, but you can't deny that they were an interesting character.
Caine also stood out to me from the beginning. One of the first things I liked about him was his name, because Caine is a cool name. I always saw him as a fun villain. Like with Jax, and everyone, I liked learning more about him as the series went on. He just wanted to be loved and appreciated for what he does and what he can do as an AI. It seemed like he trapped the humans in the circus so he wouldn't be lonely. He could've created Bubble for that same reason. His redemption in Episode 9 made me love him even more. He wants to be a better person for the humans and consider their wants and needs, and not just his own. I can imagine him and Gangle being good friends after Episode 9.
Speaking of Gangle, she was up there for me (I didn't really have a favorite in this show and I liked them all). I liked her because I was also emotional and I liked anime. I also liked her mask thing. I started to notice her wearing her comedy mask less, and she doesn't wear it at all in the last few episodes. I'm happy that she became more confident in herself with the help of Zooble, who reminded her that her feelings are what make her human. I loved their relationship, and I'm glad they had sex at the end.
I'm gonna end this here since I can say the same things about Ragatha, Kinger, and Pomni. I think I would just be repeating myself. In conclusion, I'm glad that I watched TADC. I feel like I would be disappointed in myself if I didn't keep up with the series. It kinda inspires me to watch more indie animation. I started watching Hazbin Hotel and it's okay so far (I've heard various opinions about it and I wanted to see it for myself).
Shout out to non-binary people who do identify as a third gender, who don’t have a gender at all, who have a mix, who’s gender changes, who’s gender fluctuates, who’s gender can’t be described by traditional “masculine” or “feminine” terminology, and who’s gender went mysteriously missing in the war
