i like to imagine that one night after raffles makes love to bunny and theyre both lying in bed bunny is just rambling on and talking about things like life and hopes and dreams and he asks raffles if hes ever considered marriage and raffles predictably says something like, "augh marriage! that would be the end of my life old boy i would never marry a woman!" and then bunny just sighs dreamily and says thank god because if you ever abandoned me for a wife i would kill her :) and then you :) and then myself :) and then neither of them say anything else for the rest of the night and only bunny can really fall asleep
raffles having bunnys school-age poetry memorised well enough to quote on a whim and also hes had his eye on lady melrose's necklace for a while (but claims not to know about bunnys almost-engagement with her niece who lives with her) and also hes heard from someone that bunny came into a big inheritance and also bunny Somehow did end up at his rooms for cards (but they didnt already share a club) and also raffles risked so much so immediately to Maybe bring him into the fold as a partner bc of course bunny would never turn him in (they havent seen each other in ten years) (they only shared one term at school and bunny isnt even sure he would remember him) and also raffles then restructured his entire lifestyle to keep up excuses for spending time with him... boy...
#raffles stays out of england after gift of the emperor for precisely as long as bunny is in prison#immediately makes up the weirdest most convoluted plan so that bunny will have to pretend to be a nurse#and thus spend every waking moment with raffles#later fakes his own death (AGAIN) so that they can get out of that weird convoluted situation#and live in domestic bliss in a tiny cottage#WHERE RAFFLES TAKES BUNNY'S LAST NAME#(bunny is still going 'sometimes i think he likes me as something more than a criminal partner? maybe???'#meanwhile raffles is over here all 'we're married now obviously'#'if you wear the wedding dress i'm sure i can figure out some way to steal us a wedding')#raffles is absolutely Not Normal in the slightest about his rabbit#they are both so extremely weird about each other and i love them so much (via @darchildre)
an old flame spends the whole first act telling us raffles is not getting out of this without getting married and running away and then he literally takes bunny's surname and they move away together!! ahh!!
This was going to be a quick fake poster for an imaginary sequel to Hot Fuzz so I could yap about my thoughts and ideas but I ended up spending days on it which is very unusual for me. My love for the movie still burns strong I suppose.
Anyway, on the Hot Fuzz commentary track Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg talk about how Joyce wasn’t entirely wrong to call Nicolas a fascist and they left a bunch of clues that Nicolas had turned Sandford into his own little police state once he was put in charge. Him wearing black leather gloves in the last scene was supposed to clue us onto him being the new antagonist of the town.
At first I didn’t like that idea because Hot Fuzz was such a comfort movie for me but the more I thought about it the more I liked it. The public are far more knowledgeable about how violent the police can be and a sequel could comment on that.
Below are my ideas and thoughts on a sequel story.
A new recruit, a young woman of color, arrives in Sandford. Ever since she was a young girl she dreamt of meeting Nicolas who has become something of a legend after he exposed the Sandford cult and cleaned the town up. He even seems to be the rare case of a truly ethical police officer who follows the evidence instead of profiling people and isn’t afraid to go for the rich old white people at the top.
Nicolas is very pleasant and even a bit cheeky like at the end of the movie but he’s also much older and acts his age. He introduce her to his police officers who have all been swapped out with younger people. All except Danny. The new police officers are pleasant enough but kinda intimidating, and Danny is like a ray of sunshine at the station. He is a sweet and jovial middle aged man who calls everyone love and sweetheart and his desk is allowed to be messy and cosy for some reason. Weight and Pegg have said several times that Danny is Nicolas’ romantic interest in the movie so the recruit notice Nicolas squeezing Danny’s hand when he introduce him but she doesn’t see a ring on either of their fingers. Nicolas informs her that troublemakers have been running circles around them for months so she came at just the right time.
At first she’s very impressed with Sandford. It’s clean, safe and people are very friendly. But then she starts noticing the cameras everywhere. Some were inherited from the previous force but there’s also a lot of more modern cameras. Then she notice that people immediately change their whole personality when they notice her. She starts putting things together and realize things might not be as idyllic as she thought.
She weren’t sure if Nicolas and Danny were out so she didn’t say anything but while she’s on patrol with Nicolas a shop owner asks him when he’s going to “put a ring on it” and Nicolas tells them he doesn’t want to rush things and doesn’t need the law to dictate his and Danny’s relationship. He’s completely oblivious to how contradictory that excuse sounds coming from him because he’s too convinced that he’s not as much of a stickler for the rules as he used to be.
Eventually the new recruit finds Danny sitting alone at the pub. The owner is very attentive and overly friendly with him which seems to bother Danny but he doesn’t say anything. She has a talk with Danny and he admits that he knows the townspeople are scared of the police now and he feels guilty because Nicolas was always obsessed with the law and Danny taught him to enforce it with violence. Now Nicolas is upending the town in search for the mysterious troublemakers and Danny doesn’t know what to do. The recruit tries to tell Danny that he’s the only person Nicolas listens to but Danny won’t hear it.
It naturally ends with a big climax where it’s revealed that the troublemakers are the old police force who were pushed out and replaced with a new force who is extremely loyal to Nicolas. The old gang confronts Nicolas with what he has done to the town but Nicolas doesn’t believe them. He yells “I am the good cop!” and goes into a rant about him being the one good apple who exposed the rot of the barrel and made Sandford safe and lawful, but when he asks Danny to confirm Danny just says “…People are scared, Nicolas” That completely deflates Nicolas and it clearly hurts him when Danny tells him that the townspeople are even afraid of Danny, that he doesn’t even feel part of the town he grew up in anymore because everyone are walking on eggshells around him, that they see him as an extension of Nicolas. And in a way he wants that. He wants to be part of Nicolas, but not like this. That finally force Nicolas to wake up and see what he has become. The new force aren’t pleased with this and action ensures.
By the end he finally marries Danny and the two of them retire together because Nicolas realize he’s not the new blood the town needs. He’s still nosy and becomes the head of the neighborhood watch but he has no real power anymore.
The question is if the new recruit will manage to police Sandford better or if her era will just have different problems.
The Rest Cure reads so different and real after experiencing/witnessing the Great Trans Awakening during the pandemic. Bunny gets shut up in isolation in an apartment (for one week) and goes a little GNC. Hey man, it happens to the best of us.
Raffles is just always introducing bunny to people. and bunny generally does not want to be there and people generally do not like him but raffles is going to do it anyway. and bunny is just going to keep thinking of himself as a hanger on and an embarassment and raffles is just going to keep bringing him to parties and dinners and walking arm in arm with him and introducing him as "my friend".
Bunny is so funny “ugh he keeps ignoring me >:( I know! I’ll put on a nice dress, curl my hair, and do my makeup real nice - that’ll teach him!” ok girl.
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