I HATE YOU :)

[i-flood-my-basement]

Thank you for flying Christian Airlines, in the event of an emergency suck on a Capri-Sun and know that this is God’s plan.

[honeymage]

why are ethicists kinkshaming me

[la-li-lu-le-lolz-deactivated202]

the bible said adam and eve not florence and the machine

[needlesslycryptic]

@landofshame

[greenwithenby-deactivated201609]

Person: God, I hate fake people.

Me, a bundle of straw tied into a vaguely human shape: Shit, are they talking about me…?

[respectzayn]

Ya I gave him uncooked chicken but… and he didn’t even say thanks though?

[kingjaffejoffer]

[thesugarhole]

if we are talking in person and i accidentally spit dont even call out i saw it and im dead inside

[zooeydeschanel]

[zooeydeschanel]

#find urself a winston (x)

[glassbonespaperskin]

same

[wattpadfic-deactivated20170213]

i’m pb&j - petty, bitter and jealous

[ruinedchildhood]

[astrocyte-deactivated20171202]

cashier: sorry for your wait. we’re short-staffed today

millennial: oh that’s ok no worries :)

 baby boomer:

[lauramercierbodyscrub]

cause of death: second hand embarrassment 

[mothurs]

i'm dtf

down to forget

[floozys-deactivated20180908]

me: this break i’m not gonna fall into a bad sleeping pattern 

me at 4am the next morning watching a youtube video rating the top 10 canceled 90′s cartoons:

[f-ucking-awesome]

Mom: ' well you need to call them and ask.'

Me: I dont think you understand how much i cannot do that.

[jupitersmusings]

[xenosagaepisodeone]

*wakes up in a cold sweat* post modern furries

[quinndolyns-deactivated20220403]