What happens when a sleazy tabloid reporter posted something nasty about Charlie?
Lucifer bursts into the studio and fixes his infuriated glare on the hellborn creep. He’s a sniveling, beady eyed, oil-slick character, who’s missing a few fingers.
Lucifer: Are you Willard Leech?
Willard: Yeah? What do you want?
Lucifer: Yeah I have a problem.
Actually, it's your problem. I’m Charlie Morningstar’s father.
Willard tries to make a run for it but Lucifer blocks him.
Lucifer: You know something Willard, I understand the whole freedom of the press thing, I even support it. But what I don’t support is someone writing lies about my daughter using her hotel as a cover for a brothel or calling her a whore! Nobody talks about my daughter the way you did!
Willard: Intimidated) Yes. Are you gonna bite off my fingers too?
Lucifer:(Surprised) Charlie bit you?
Willard: No. Deer boy over there.
He points over to Alastor who is just casually wiping the blood from his lips.
Willard: Look I already promised him that I'd erase that post, write a retract, and apologize to the princess, so what more do you people want from me?
Lucifer: (Shocked) I don't know yet.
I'll get back to you, excuse
Lucifer walks up to Alastor.
Lucifer: Hey, what the hell is going on here?
Alastor: Now, now, your royal shortness, everything's under control, you can go home now.
Lucifer: I don’t want to go home! What did you do that guy?
Alastor: I simply told him if he couldn’t use his fingers to write anything nice then he shouldn’t have fingers at all. And then I had a small snack.
Lucifer: What gives you the right to do that?
Alastor: Well I’m Charlie’s boyfriend.
Lucifer: Well I’m her father.
Alastor: So what? Are you mad at me?
Lucifer: No. Not this time.
Alastor: So what’s the problem?
Lucifer: Well the problem is, maybe I wanted to break his face.
Lucifer: No, you ruined it.
Alastor: No but he pissed himself.
Lucifer: Not bad, but he would have puked if I hit him.