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@fastestbialive
LORD this is a good blog... can we all talk about how oliver and barry went on a real, proper date in the last crossover or what? :D (also... small bi barry getting a big ass crush on oliver and being giddy af when he learns oliver is also bi like!!!!!!!)
Thank you! I’m glad you like the blog. I will admit that the crossovers all feel like fever dreams to me but I assume you’re talking about them going out for DRINKS and Barry being like HUGS.
Ah I miss those days. :’)
But yes. Just imagine. Smol bean Barry Allen is bi. He’s known he was bi for a while. Since high school maybe. And as many of us do, he develops an ill-advised celebrity crush on billionaire playboy/perpetuate fuck-up Oliver Queen from afar. Iris gets it; the guy is hot and he has this tragically misunderstood air about him. Joe does not get it; why do his children love bad boys so damn much?!
But then Oliver Queen goes missing and is presumed dead when Barry’s in college. Barry cries when he hears the news, like many people do when celebrities who mean something to them pass away. Then, when Oliver pops up again five years later? Barry reads every scrap of information he can find on him. Because god help him, he’s twenty-five years old and he’s an adult and he has a job...but he also still has a big, ridiculous crush on Oliver fucking Queen.
In fact, he didn’t think anything could displace his crush on Oliver Queen...until reports of the Arrow started showing up in his daily newsfeed. The grace. The stealth. The skill. The satisfying yet disturbing ruthlessness in meting out justice against the wealthy and corrupt.
So imagine his surprise, dismay, embarrassment, and giddy disbelief when he actually meets Oliver Queen who turns out to be the Arrow and is somehow even hotter in person and is also a really good person on top of everything else and so very intriguing and poor Barry is just...head over heels. He’s a goner. He’s never getting over this crush, this hopeless, ill-advised, doomed crush on his very heterosexual male friend---
What’s that you say, Felicity? Oliver is bisexual?
Barry Allen now knows what it feels like to be struck by lightning twice.
Barry and Bi!Caitlin working in the lab together when Iris calls the lab comms (so she's on speaker) and says she needs bi- sensitivity readers for her current article. Barry looks directly at Caitlin and says "Sure, we'll come right BI," Both Iris and Caitlin groan simultaneously. Cisco laughs in the distance.
Iris hangs up on them. xD
She really does need the bi sensitivity reader and appreciates their help, but she also hates having to edit THREE TIMES to make sure they didn’t sneak any bi puns into her articles.
You are one of the only people I've followed from my recommended blogs thing, and I love your blog already
Why thank you! <3
leonard conditions getting married on barry quitting his job with the CCPD and barry agrees because he hasn’t been allowed to touch half the crime scenes in the city anyway since told captain singh that he was dating leonard snart. barry picks up a job as a substitute teacher at the local high school while he’s considering different options and it turns out he rocks at teaching chemistry. if he doesn’t know an answer (or pop culture reference) he can just use the speed force to look it up real quick and he becomes an instant favorite with the students and the school. so when one of the other teachers in the department retires, he gets an offer to become full-time and accepts it.
then he marries captain cold and is INSTANTLY catapulted to rockstar status among the students, and the administration is too afraid of it looking like retaliation for the gay thing so they have to just be like you can keep your job but please don’t bring him to faculty holiday parties. (he brings him to faculty holiday parties.)
someone at the faculty holiday party gets the great idea to try to ~relate to leonard and they ask him if he’ll do like. a “scared straight” program for the kids and leonard is like “oh WILL i” and charms them into agreeing to let it be a surprise for barry. obviously he shows up to the assembly in full captain cold regalia and is like “hey kids, don’t do drugs. don’t sell drugs either—terrible investment. and don’t make my mistakes. take robbing an ATM—“
and barry arrives and is like “oh my god, what have you done,” and the other teachers are like “no he’s doing great!” and barry’s like “i have to go right now immediately” and runs out of the auditorium
and on stage leonard is like “your first instinct is going to be to use a stolen debit card and take out as much as you can. that’s a rookie mistake. take out twenty dollars, but don’t take the bill out of the machine.”
and the principal is like “uh, mister cold—“
and leonard is like “after five minutes, it’ll trigger an alert to the atm company. locks the whole machine down. they’ll send a tech out to fix it. once he opens up the machine, looking for the problem…”
and a freshman raises their hand and the principal is like “no questions” and leonard is like “yes you, with the hand” and the kid is like “you rob the technician?” and leonard is like “bingo!” and then the flash drags him off the stage. it goes down as the best assembly in school history and backstage leonard is just like hi dear how has your day been
What’s hapier than getting to have your first kiss with the love of your life other than getting to do it twice? Our love story never ends, Barry. Because the only thing more inevitable than Crisis is us.
So Barry and Oliver move in together.
What's the first ridiculous domestic thing they fight about?
Does Barry have a tendency to leave socks everywhere?
Does Oliver put the toilet paper roll the wrong way?
Do their aesthetics for apartment decorating clash?
And how do they make up afterward?
Do you think Barry would be the hand-in-Oliver's-back-pocket type of boyfriend?
Or the holdings-hands type.
Or the hands-off-but-orbiting-each-other's-space-with-occasional-eye-contact type?
Like if they were grocery shopping for example. While picking out cereal and arguing with Oliver about quinoa (Oliver hates quinoa on principle, I just decided).
How would Barry be broadcasting to the world I'M OLIVER QUEEN'S BOYFRIEND!!!! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?! BELIEVE IT. I'M HIS BOYFRIEND.
Because you know the boy broadcasts his emotions.
I LOVE THIS POST
💞Thank you for posting such a fun question 💞
Okay so I think he would be a mix of the last two. Because I feel like those two can convey so much just looking at eachother and Barry loves that, but also Oliver's hand belongs to him 50% of the time esp when they're in public. Depending on where they are. There have def been one or two moments where Ollie would be like "Barry, I need both my hands to get your stupid quinoa down." and Barry would internally be like "That's not my problem it's holding Ollie's hand time". (Though kinda off Barry topic I also feel like, Oliver might pull on Barry's back pocket a little to direct him somewhere/try to pull him back to earth when he got too drifty lol)
I LOVE these two thanks again for the fun question!
- Batty
I love this response! And 100% agree. Also I loove the image of Oliver like...guiding a very distracted Barry along by his back pocket.
"Barry. The nice lady behind you needs to get to the quinoa too." Tug.
"Barry you're blocking the entire doorway." Tug.
"Barry LOOK BOTH WAYS BEFORE CROSSING THE STREET." Very Anxious Tug.
(Also Oliver has given up arguing about quinoa with Barry. The economic and environmental implications of the quinoa craze bother him, but at the same time Barry actually needs to include a superfood in approximately every meal due to his ridiculous metabolism, even with Cisco's energy bars.)
Do you think Barry would be the hand-in-Oliver's-back-pocket type of boyfriend?
Or the holdings-hands type.
Or the hands-off-but-orbiting-each-other's-space-with-occasional-eye-contact type?
Like if they were grocery shopping for example. While picking out cereal and arguing with Oliver about quinoa (Oliver hates quinoa on principle, I just decided).
How would Barry be broadcasting to the world I'M OLIVER QUEEN'S BOYFRIEND!!!! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?! BELIEVE IT. I'M HIS BOYFRIEND.
Because you know the boy broadcasts his emotions.
When Barry Allen--Barry "sometimes I crush on my nemeses so hard I turn them good" Allen--BARRY ALLEN needs to remind you to focus you know you've really reached peak disaster bi.
I LIVE
Okay I was less active than is optimal for a while but Crisis has kicked me in the face with bi!Barry feels sooooo which new characters from seasons 3-6 of The Flash or the last 3 crossovers do you see Barry as being attracted to? Men, women, and nonninary! Come let me know who and why!
If I ever stop reblogging this scene assume I'm dead.
Also IF THE DCEU IS PART OF THE ARROWVERSE
That means someday Arrowverse Barry Allen could potentially meet DCEU Aquaman and DCEU Superman.
And poor, bi mess Barry would just be like
Also can we talk about Barry giving Superman the full up-down onceover? There is no straight reason.
The Crisis crossover has me in my Olivarry feels y'all. 🥺