This is so cool!
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

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@felisdolly
This is so cool!
The main collection is (mostly) complete :3
(Not pictured: audiobook CD set of Hannibal Rising from the 2000s, currently in my car)
I’ve been hyperfixated on Hannibal as a character and the surrounding adaptations since about 2021, and finally got the Manhunter film on DVD the other day!
It was honestly a bit meh cinematically, unfortunately…I really appreciated it for how well it captured the more true crime feel of the original book, since once all the other stuff got published the tone completely shifted.
But there was so much unnecessary background music and weird cuts, along with how bland Hannibal felt in comparison to the character even the original book constructed, that it threw me off a bit. He’s not meant to be perfect, of course, but mr British man didn’t really feel right. Also I know Dolarhyde is meant to be “unsightly” or whatever but that man did not look 40 in this movie.
I’m very interested in building the collection more with finding first print editions of the other two books, along with supplementary materials to the adaptations, especially stuff that came out with the NBC show, but it’s a lot rarer/more expensive so in due time :)
“teenage daydreams, shower thoughts, and daily surveillance”
I’ve been stuck at home a lot over break and with my health issues. One of the only places I’ve visited is my childhood home, just 15 minutes away from my apartment. It feels so odd when I visit, like I can still see each stage of my life from while I lived there, coexisting suspended in time. I keep going back to my childhood bathroom, with the little fairy lights, where I’d impulsively cut my hair in the three fold mirror. It’s seen all of these versions of me. Watched me through my worst mental breakdowns, my teen relationships, my post-run euphoria, never looking away. Eyes always symbolized the sense of being ceaselessly, almost supernaturally, observed, of others’ expectations, in my art. Something I feel extra right now, no longer able to run, confined to a passive stability wanting to explode. Anyways, all of the weird memories I can’t let go seem to be all I can draw right now, so I thought I’d visualize it.
something I’ve noticed as a result of really unrefreshing sleep from health issues is I just…don’t feel like I need to sleep ??? anymore ???
permanently tired and in pain, but after a while it just feels like the same amount of tired and pain whether I sleep or not unless I go 3+ days yk
most of my days are bed rest and 1-2 Activities, so I’m getting rest, I just don’t feel much of a difference between awake rest and asleep rest and I wonder if anyone else has experienced that before ???
new pfp just dropped :3
started an insta acc by the same username for cute day in my life type stuff to cope w being stuck at home sm and felt overly compelled to make a pfp for it
Something that always bothers me in mental health spaces is the fear of relating too much to each-other across the lines of different disorders. Too many times I've met people who are not dissociative systems, but have dissociative experiences (such as from BPD), and they trip over themselves saying "no no, I mean, I don't REALLY understand what you go through, my thing is totally different," and it makes me a little upset. Disorders are just clusters of symptoms packaged together in a certain way, that's why the names and criteria often change across DSM and ICD editions, and viewing them as entirely exclusive clubs where only they could possibly understand anything about each other isn't a particularly healthy way of seeing it. The lines between disorder labels are blurrier than you think. You are not being a bad person or overstepping for relating to symptoms of a disorder, or people with a disorder, without having their specific label. Very rarely (if ever, frankly) is there a symptom that can only occur in one disorder, or even one type of disorder. Psychosis can occur in countless circumstances. Dissociation and identity compartmentalization can occur in countless circumstances. It's better to focus more on your specific symptoms and building community with your fellow neurodivergent people, using the resources that help you regardless of if they were specifically made for your diagnosis, over worrying about whether or not you're "allowed" to relate to something or experience something similarly to someone else.
made this lil panel sketch about life rn dealing with a sudden worsening of my chronic health issues
I remember listening to this that night while it snowed at like 5am
i don’t want to be a contributing member of society !!! i just want to consume media and hold someone’s hand !!!
Like I wanna do cool little plane designs and math stuff as an actual career but also like…I want a break from reality
This aged so funny
My whole life is mostly media or holding someone’s hand now
I love that my blog goes back to HS so it’s a lil archive of all my arcs :3
I love being a film student but man is it ironic that a major that’s supposed to push me to be creative at least with my own projects has just led to me doing almost nothing creative bc I got so into the technical stuff and the creative stuff is just way too hard on my brain/body rn T T
I should do smth artsy for fun again
sometimes i don’t care about getting better anymore. i just wanna give up.
me fr but like w health issues omg
me was born this way
i love when cats roll around all cutely and then they look up at you like ₍^. .^₎ umm hi did you notices how cute i just was? did u see?
Not perfect examples but man I love my cat
⠀ ㅤ𝅘𝅥𝅮ꦿ . . 𝑐𝑢𝑡𝑒𝑠𝑦 𝑠𝑦𝑚𝑏𝑜𝑙𝑠 . . ❀ ˚. ౿
𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘪𝘤 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘺𝘮𝘣𝘰𝘭𝘴 :
♪⊹₊⟡⋆ 𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋ ♩ೀ⋆。 ˚𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋🎧ྀི
♪.𖥔 ݁ ˖ . 𝄞 ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ᭪ 𓈒 ꒪ ♬ 𝄞⸝⸝꙳
⤹˚˖♬୭ 𓂃˖♪彡 𐔌♫ྀི𓈒 ݁⋆ . ♪ ༘⋆
flower symbols :
⁺˳✿⏦₊ *ੈ𑁍 ་۪ ✿◞ 𓍯ོ ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.
ꕤ˖⸝⸝₊˚ 𑁍ࠬܓ 𓂃𓍯 ༘⋆✿ .⚘
𐙚˚ ༘❀⋆ ₊ ⊹❀ .☘︎ ݁˖ 𑁍𖥧𓆸 ·༻𐫱༺·
⚘⡱ 𓂃˚‧ 𓆸 ֒ 𑁍܀ °❀⋆.ೃ࿔ ⊱✿⊰
𝘏𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘴𝘺𝘮𝘣𝘰𝘭s !
₊˚⊹ᡣ𐭩 ♡˖ ⊹ ˚₊·—̳͟͞͞♡⟢ ᥫ᭡ˊ˗ ❦
⋆˙⟡♡✧˖° ᨦ ෆ ᨩ 𓆩♡𓆪 <𝟑 𓏲ּ𝄢
𓈈 ♥︎ 𓈈 ও˖ ࣪⊹ ♡໒꒱.°⑅ ꨄ︎ ಇ.
ᯤ ♡ ︵ᡣ𐭩 ᝰꪑ ༘ᰔᩚ. 𓊆ྀི❤︎𓊇ྀི
˚₊‧꒰ა❤︎໒꒱ ‧₊ ₊˚ෆ⊹₊ ⋆ ᡣ𐭩 ྀིྀ 𓏲𑁘
c͟u͟t͟e͟ ͟b͟o͟w͟ ͟s͟y͟m͟b͟o͟l͟s͟ ͟
౨ৎ༝⁺໒꒱ིྀ ֪ 𓏼𝜗℘◟ ͜⠀◞ ྀི𖣁𓈒 ⋆𐙚 ̊.
Ⳋ᧙ ⊹ ྀི ꒰͡ 𐙚 ͡꒱ ༘ ʚ⑅ɞ ˚.。⋆୨୧˚༘⋆
𝜗𝜚 ── ⊹ ‧₊˚ ˚𝜗℘ ꒱ ೀ⋆⑅˚ ၄၃
⋈ ⁺ . ✦ . ୨୧ ⁺ . ִ ྀི 𝜗˚̣̣̣℘ྀི.
ears
ᐢ ᐢ ᕱ ᕱ ᕬ ᕬ ᙏ ᵔ ᵔ ᐡ ᐡ
∩∩ ꪒ ꪒ ՞ ՞ ⍝ ⍝ ᥥ ᥥ ᘏᘏ
hands / arms
ก ก ٩ ۶ ⊃⊂ ᑌ ᑌ ദ്ദി ა૮
ฅ ฅ ੭ ᐣ っ ς ੭ ੭ ੭っ ∩ ∩
brackets
𝇋 𝇌 ૮ ა ૮₍ ₎ა ( ິ )ິ ໒꒰ྀི ྀི꒱७ ૮ ོ ོ𑁬
₍ ₎ ꒰ ꒱ྀི ૮꒰ ꒱ა ᧔ ᧓ ᧔ྀི ᧓ྀི ʕ ྀི ྀིʔ
꒰ ꒱ ଘ꒰ ꒱ ꒰ ੭ ꒱ ᐣ 𓊆 𓊇 ᑦ꒰ྀིྀི ྀྀི꒱ᐣ ૮꒰ྀི ྀི꒱ა
mouths/ lips
ᵕ ⤙ ᴖ Ⱉ △ ࿁ ꕀ ‸
༝ ‿ ⌓ ⩊ ⌑ 。 ㅁ ⇀
̫ ֊ ᎔ ᗜ Д ³ ᯅ ˬ
eyes
ˊ ˋ ◞ ◟ .ܸ .ܸ • • › ‹ o̴̶̷᷄ o̴̶̷̥᷅ ≧ ≦
ˇ ˇ ◜◝ ◡◡ •̀ •́ ^^ ᵒ̴̶̷̥́ ᵒ̴̶̷̣̥̀ ꈍ ꈍ
⏑ ⏑ ◝ ◜ _ ̫ _ •́ •̀ ⊳⊲ o̴̶̷̤ o̴̶̷̤ ˃̶̤́ ˂̶̤̀
´ ` -᷅ -᷄ . . ߹ ߹ ՞ ՞ ಠ ಠ ᴗ͈ ᴗ͈
rip hannibal you would have loved killing people who call themselves “ai artists”
If you mess up a social interaction you can say "Failed Experiment" and move on
Cannot stress enough that you say this in your head
dating-type app but instead of matching for romance it connects writers/artists+ who don't want to do research with autistic people with the appropriate special interest
i need this in my life