✖illest ✖ @feliz-ravidad - Tumblr Blog

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✆ I hope my name's Big Papi B)

Name - Cinnamon Apple

Ringtone - hahaha

Picture -

#this is nowhere near the reality i wanted #Snowflake;#keep;

park-saigo-blog

AU:: Doctor's Orders - Underwater :: Wonshik ✘ Yonghee

park-saigo-blog

She was past the point of consolation, her sobs becoming messy and uncoordinated as she moved to wipe her face against her arm, suddenly pushing up and scrambling into the doctor’s lap. It was something that she knew was punishable by solitary confinement, but her mind was a shaken up puzzle that had been dumped out with her hair.

She was digging her fingers into the back of his white coat and pressing her forehead into his shoulder to shake the sting of tears. “I’m not fine. Not fine. Something’s wrong.” She breathed, curling up closer and closing her eyes. “I want to go home. But home is here…” Yonghee was talking in circles, but it made no significant concern in her mind. It was like a vacant space that clung to the first sentence that fell into it.

feliz-ravidad

He staggered from his crouched position to catch her, awkwardly cradling the girl that must have been half his size against his chest. Paternal instinct told him to coo and soothe her, but the action was so sudden that all he could do was huff a breath through his nose and clutch her tighter. Hearing her choked voice suddenly struck him with culpability, his arm throwing one side of the long lab coat over her shoulders to block her view. He rushed the halls with her clinging to him, avoiding the security cameras where he knew they were placed until he could safely lock both of them in his office. After setting her feet down, Wonshik leaned her head toward him to inspect for any gouges or cuts to her scalp. “You have to calm down and tell me what’s wrong, Miss Park- tell me what you’re feeling.” The professional banter was tiring after the spike of adrenaline, soon letting his tone strain and break to the voice he would use to scold a child. “You could’ve really hurt yourself, and you’re worrying me to death. I have to keep you in ace condition, or the experime-” he immediately stopped to clear his throat, smoldering the annoyance in his words and dropping his fingers away from her head. “I’m assigning you a new room first thing tomorrow, one closer to mine. You can’t be so foolish so late at night; you know what they’d do of I hadn’t found you first?”

#Snowflake;#AU;#para;#dev;

park-saigo-blog

AU:: Doctor's Orders - Underwater :: Wonshik ✘ Yonghee

park-saigo-blog

Her smile was comfortably fashioned, like a child awaiting the praise of a parent after showcasing some great feat. Her expression slowly fell into confusion when he didn’t smile back, her eyes wandering to the spilled food that splashed over the tiles. It reminded her of how hungry she was, and more importantly, how that one bowl of noodles would never be returned to its previous state, much like the cut up curtains of hair that piled on the floor. Now she felt like a child who had painted the wall and expected her parent to appreciate the beauty of it, not the technicality.

She flinched from his touch when he brushed her lap, suddenly letting out a choked sob and pushing herself back with her bruised feet.

“So much pounding…pounding! My head is pounding. Like bricks all crammed into my brain.”

She wailed, digging her fingers into her temples and letting them grip at her choppy hair, the weight of the situation finally crushing her delusional spree. She was sniffing and curled against the edge of her plain bed, squeezing her eyes shut and wishing that her hands would crush her skull.

“So much pounding. There’s something heavy in my head. I thought that if I cut it off…”

feliz-ravidad

He was so short of experience that he began to panic, though his expression never hinted at discomfort aside from his wrinkled brow. For minutes he listened to his own heart pulse in his ears, unsure if he should alert Yonghee’s nurse for a shot to calm her, or take his own action. Opting for the latter, Wonshik carefully peeled the girl’s fingers from her forehead and set her hands in her lap. He had to clear his throat quickly to form a firm sentence. "You’re nervous from the drugs, Yonghee. You’re damn near impossible to put under sober, I had to give you something." He nodded next but the movement was unsure, his glance rapidly flickering between her dirtied uniform and her wide pupils. "It’ll wear off soon, I promise. But Yonghee, you—" he stopped short to avoid telling her how bad the damage was. It was petty to hold her aesthetic so dearly considering the severity of her condition, but his fingers caught the last trendils of ebony and let them fall through his fingers. On the clock- or even at all- he couldn’t tell Yonghee her hair was his favorite piece of her look, though the disappointment glared in his eyes was enough to say so. However, at the frontline of his thoughts he couldn’t help but wonder if the treatment had worked- especially the broken pieces of memory he’s improvised to include himself. "You’re just fine, ne? I told you I wouldn’t let anything happen to you, Miss Park."

#Snowflake;#AU;#para;#dev;

park-saigo-blog

AU:: Doctor's Orders - Underwater :: Wonshik ✘ Yonghee

One strip fluttered into her lap, followed by another, then another. Black ribbons covered the lap of her hospital gown, small needles clinging to her thin fingers as the scissors soared through her hair. She was sitting cross legged on the floor, her thin body rocking back and forth as she muttered incoherent reassurances to herself, nervous laughter slipping every now and then as the weight gradually began to melt from her head, her palms hitting against her temples as she shook the excess strands off, leaving a choppy mat of thick hair that bobbed over her neck. “No more, no more.” She recited, picking up another strip to begin shearing through.

feliz-ravidad

Wonshik expected to find her room silent, knowing that the previous session had been daunting. Not that she’d offered any answers to his questions, but her emotion had been enough. Each time she’d cried out or screamed his bones ached with chill, making him even more reluctant to do his job. Surely in her REM state she hadn’t heard his voice shake when he told her to relax, or felt his large hands crushing her small ones to keep her still through all the noise. He suspected a proper dinner would ease her, and drove several blocks to get the noodles and specific brand of gummy candies she’d mentioned she liked in previous sessions. A true waste- he dropped all of the food the second he’d breached the door, catching Yonghee naked of her dark locks with the silver culprit of the act clenched in her frail fingers. “Miss Park!” he started as he clammored to steal the scissors from her hand, stuffing the sharp blades safely into the pocket of his coat. Next he gripped her shoulders, shaking her lightly out of her drone-like state and falling particles of hair from her clothes and head to the floor. “Why would you do that? Your hair was so…beautiful.” As the words left his lips, he paused to take the sight in with knitted brows, his fingers unclenching from her shirt to slowly brush the excess strands from her lap. “I have to report this, Yonghee. It’s reckless behavior…what happened?”

#Snowflake;#AU;#para;#dev;

feliz-ravidad

AU:: Doctor's Orders :: Wonshik ✘ Yonghee

feliz-ravidad

☢ It took so much composure for Wonshik to keep his lower lip out of his teeth, opting to only let his brows furrow. He knew the extent of the worst that could happen to her in the facility, and insisting she stay flared guilt through him in volume. Naturally he cared for every patient, but Yonghee was delicate in a different way, and her childish nervous habits never failed to remind him of that. His eyes flickered to the clock and heaved a sigh from his lungs, prompting him to push a mess of papers on the desk’s surface aside until he found a blue tinted pad and tore one of it’s pages. He mumbled as he scrawled the paper with names and dates, “For now I’m going to prescribe you a low dose of lithium; it should ease your hallucinations.”

When he’d finished, he rose from his chair and knelt by the couch to meet her at eye level, pinching the scrap of paper down with his thumb as he offered it to her. “If it doesn’t work, I’ll give you my sworn word you’ll be taken care of here, by me personally. You’re underestimating the severity of your mental state, and I know you’ve told me several times you’d like to be on your own, but I feel you should separate yourself from this figment of your imagination as much as possible.” He caught one of her hands to slip the prescription into her fingers, patting the back of her hand after. “All I’m asking is that you consider it. I’d only need two or three months to work with you- if you don’t make progress in that time, I’ll give you permission for release.”

park-saigo-blog

Yonghee finally landed her eyes on his when she heard the shuffling of papers, her body going stiff when he made his way over. He was a rare exception to her cold vibe; the only one she felt okay to be weak around, or share the innermost pickings of her brain. Anything he said, she guzzled like liquid gold. Every drop felt like a protective sheet that melted over her vulnerable skin. Finally gathering the courage to look directly at him, she nodded and tightened her fingers around the blue paper, her throat bobbing as she swallowed. “I want to get better. I trust you, doctor.”

#Snowflake;#AU;#para;#dev;

feliz-ravidad

AU:: Doctor's Orders :: Wonshik ✘ Yonghee

park-saigo-blog

Yonghee’s expression was caught in a fixed state of conflict, eyes darted toward her curled fingers as the tip of her shoes touched nervously, the fear only somewhat quelled by his soothing voice. Her own came out lower than usual, refusing to make eye contact with the male sitting across from her for fear of seeing the disgust in his eyes.

“Doctor, I need something more than ‘they’ll take care of you’. I— I’m giving my life away to be here. I have friends. You’ll be the only person that I trust, and I do trust you now, but…you need to take care of me.” She brought a hand up to rub at her nose, slinking back against the plush leather seat and crawling her fingers into her lap, her gaze shifting a little higher to peer at his desk.

"Please take care of me. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life here."

feliz-ravidad

☢ It took so much composure for Wonshik to keep his lower lip out of his teeth, opting to only let his brows furrow. He knew the extent of the worst that could happen to her in the facility, and insisting she stay flared guilt through him in volume. Naturally he cared for every patient, but Yonghee was delicate in a different way, and her childish nervous habits never failed to remind him of that. His eyes flickered to the clock and heaved a sigh from his lungs, prompting him to push a mess of papers on the desk's surface aside until he found a blue tinted pad and tore one of it's pages. He mumbled as he scrawled the paper with names and dates, "For now I'm going to prescribe you a low dose of lithium; it should ease your hallucinations." When he'd finished, he rose from his chair and knelt by the couch to meet her at eye level, pinching the scrap of paper down with his thumb as he offered it to her. "If it doesn't work, I'll give you my sworn word you'll be taken care of here, by me personally. You're underestimating the severity of your mental state, and I know you've told me several times you'd like to be on your own, but I feel you should separate yourself from this figment of your imagination as much as possible." He caught one of her hands to slip the prescription into her fingers, patting the back of her hand after. "All I'm asking is that you consider it. I'd only need two or three months to work with you- if you don't make progress in that time, I'll give you permission for release."/small>t

#Snowflake;#Para;#AU;

feliz-ravidad

AU:: Doctor's Orders :: Wonshik ✘ Yonghee

park-saigo-blog

She had been talking for what seemed like hours, but felt like mere seconds to her, describing something about what she’d done that week and when her “friend” began to show up. It always looped back to her doing laundry and looking up to see the figment idly perched on top of the washing machine, staring with big, amber eyes. Her words drawled on in sweet laces that held a certain softness, yet seemed like words spilling from a tape recorder, her bright eyes flickering up to his when he raised a finger to silence her. Any piece of attention provided from this man garnered her full attention and sent little butterflies crawling around the lining of her stomach. Her small lips curled slightly to return a warm smile, although it slowly began to fade at his suggestion.

Panic was the first emotion to set in. “But…but doctor, I— I haven’t done anything, have I? Am I bad?” Her brows knitted as her small fingers nervously played at her sleeves, the long coil of black hair rolled into a bun at the back of her head. "You won’t let them do anything bad, will you? You know I have nightmares. What if I can’t sleep here? What if they assign me a new doctor? Oh no…no, not a new doctor. Never if they give me a new doctor." She plopped the tip of her thumb into her mouth and shook her head rapidly.

feliz-ravidad

☢ He'd become an expert at keeping his expression relaxed but firm, hiding any glimmer of ulterior motive. In truth the hospital needed funding, and even the girl's small chunk of income would help dramatically, not to mention how well off they'd be if human testing went according to plan. Even with the darkest of possibilities fogging his thoughts, his head shook side to side and widened the curve of his lips. "You haven't done anything bad, no- but I'm afraid you might." "Remember, I asked you to help me help you. I can't be as useful if I'm only seeing you once a week, ne?" Wonshik's voice stayed low to soothe her obvious fear, though his hand retracted and draped over the arm of his chair instead of lingering over her leg. "Imagine how much better you'll feel if you can see me whenever you need to. I'd make arrangements to put you under only my care if it would help, though you'll be assigned a physician and nurse for the things I can't do. It's not as horrible as you're making it out to be; think of it as...a vacation. The only other option is load you down on medication- personally and professionally speaking, I'd rather not."

#Snowflake;#Para;#AU;

AU:: Doctor's Orders :: Wonshik ✘ Yonghee

☢ Wonshik tapped the blunt end of his pen against the blank, white sheets of paper more than the inked side. He couldn't even bother to take notes for Yonghee anymore; everything he needed was already stowed away and scanned in neat folders, locked safely with the rest of his files. Just 3 sessions in and the girl was more than he'd prepared for, but she wasn't giving him anything new from last week that would suggest progress or regression. If he had to put it nicely, it sounded like useless rambling, and she was running circles with her thoughts and words that he was positive would never form pattern. But he could admit her voice was calming, maybe more theraputic to him than the opposite way it should be, and he enjoyed their sessions. He listened to her intently, nodding his head in understanding, or mumbling a sound of agreement every so often as he pushed his glasses higher on the bridge of his nose. Once she paused speech for breath, he held a finger up to interrupt her, offering a wary smile. "I know this isn't what you want to hear, but you should consider what we discussed last time." A sharp brow raised from behind the thick, black frames as his glance lifted from the empty paper to the girl's tired eyes, his arm extending to pat her knee sympathetically. "I think some full time here would be good for you, Yonghee. I'm obligated to demand it considering some of the things you've told me, but I'm kind enough to leave that desicion up to you."

#Snowflake;#Para #AU;