okay i defied gravity now what
i didn't even have to try
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Kiana Khansmith
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okay i defied gravity now what
i didn't even have to try
i'm sorry i don't know what came inside me. came into me. came over me. sorry.
Every man thinks a conversation is a script and he is CHRISTIAN BALE and u are GIRL #3
i keep thinking about this post and laughing
mods add one neutron to every atom in her body
#not to be a science nerd but i kinda wonder what would happen here#like presumably radioactive decay but what exactly would go down? would it kill you? fast or slow? much to think about
This would kill you in multiple ways.
If all your atoms gained one neutron, all the hydrogen in your body would become deuterium, so all the water in your body would become heavy water, which is very bad. In most cases, adding a neutron to an atom doesn't change its chemistry, but hydrogen is special because it's so light: chemical reactions involving deuterium and heavy water happen at different rates than those with regular hydrogen, and in living cells this messes with various enzymes, especially ones involving cell mitosis. Heavy water is fine to drink in small quantities, but once about 40% of your water is heavy water it becomes cytotoxic. 100% of your water being heavy water would certainly be fatal.
Let's go through the other atoms in your body and see what happens when we add a neutron:
Carbon: All your C-12 becomes C-13, but that's still stable. Your dead body would be incredibly confusing to future archaeologists trying to do radiocarbon dating though.
Nitrogen: N-14 becomes N-15, which is also stable. No problem.
Oxygen: O-15 becomes O-16. Still stable, not a problem.
Phosphorous: very bad. Your P-31 becomes P-32, which is a beta emitter with a short half-life of 2 weeks. Humans are about 1% phosphorus by mass, so you'd have something like 0.5-1.0 kilograms of a very hot isotope in you. Worse, since a lot of the phosphorous in your body literally makes up your DNA, the radioactivity would be right in the worst possible place. This would definitely be fatal.
Calcium: Ca-40 becomes Ca-41, which is radioactive, but has a half-life of 100,000 years. Not a big deal.
Sulfur: S-32 becomes S-33. Stable.
Sodium: also bad. Na-23 would become Na-24, which decays with both electron and gamma emission. I think the lower proportion of sodium in the body means the phosphorous is the bigger issue though.
Potassium: K-39 becomes K-40, which is another weakly radioactive one probably not worth worrying about.
My guess is that the phosphorous-induced radiation damage would kill you long before the heavy water cytotoxicity did. Since it's right in your DNA, you'd probably stop synthesizing proteins almost immediately and have an unpleasant death similar to amanita mushroom poisoning (which inhibits RNA polymerase), which typically takes less than a day.
Commenting “AI Slop” on a high school acquaintance’s Instagram post of their newborn baby
why haven’t we coined a term for the oppression faced by people who are good at giving head
I'm never going to hell
Men should be injured for my entertainment
if i met a genie and fixed the world and all its ills with my first two wishes, my third wish would be that sabrina carpenter would get gradually taller. she'd be in on it and think it was hilarious. we'd have a strong cap at 7 feet here, maybe an inch a week so people have time to theorize--let's not be ridiculous. but she'd still keep up the "ooh! im so little and small!" schtick. but shed be gradually getting taller. she'd be like 6'1" and still jumping for the microphone. and she'd never say anything about it. and if anyone asked shed act like she had no idea what they were talking about. and shed cheekily play into it a little bit but mostly still keep up the "ooh im so little and small" schtick. do you see my vision. do you get it
ok and so if i met a genie and fixed the world and all its ills in one wish i would do the sabrina carpenter thing second and third i would wish for all evidence of one random taylor swift song to disappear from the world once every month or so. taylor would have no memory of it. her fans would remember it and there would be an outcry over where it went (it's not even in concert videos anymore!) but taylor would have no memory of it
instead, all her brainspace spent on that song would be replaced with the vivid memories of roman gladiator, taylaurius velox. she's able to hide this at first, but her music begins to take on a gradually romaner and romaner tint. at first, people are like "damn, she's getting REALLY conservative, huh" and other people are like "wow, she's so deep, she knows what a rubicon is" but eventually travis kelce leaves her out of nowhere (he wasn't sure if dating someone possessed by a roman gladiator made him gay or not and anyway he was getting sick of being like "we're going to play the lions" and taylor being like "LIONS? WHERE?") and taylor publishes an entire brutus themed album about this betrayal and it's beginning to weird people out
and so eventually travis kelce is getting like, bomb threats sent to his family for leaving taylor and eventually he's like "okay, okay, i left her because she kept having all these vivid nightmares of gladatorial combat and she kept saying that football was giving her the ick because we never actually killed anybody for the glory of rome" and then he just gets more bomb threats because he left a struggling woman during a mental health crisis
and eventually taylor is writing music about her forbidden roman senator lover and her fanbase is either whittled WAY down or WAY up because people want to watch this trainwreck happen (or maybe she influences culture so hard that we're just all really into rome now) but she's being super cagey about the name of this roman senator. until. and now here's the twist:
weird al has been getting all of the same vivid memories of taylaurius velox. and he still has all his memories of her old songs. so he's writing all these detailed song parodies of taylor swift songs that don't exist anymore including specific details about their shared gladiatorial reality that taylor has never shared with anybody else. including that her lover's name was publius, and she's been calling him Poob for short
at this point a lot of original swifties are leaving. they could do the brutus stuff, but they really can't survive poob. taylor makes a clapping back at the haters song including the lyric "these bitches don't know publius" and it ends up all over all sorts of merch. there's a renewed archaeological interest in roman gladatorial combat
most importantly, the internet discourse is the best it's ever been. does this make taylor swift transmasc? is travis kelce problematic for leaving his fiancee while she gradually morphs into a roman gladiator? is this good queer representation? if taylaurius velox was a gay man, does that mean the gaylors were technically correct? is weird al morally wrong for capitalizing off of her music if she cant remember it anymore? was weird al sent by god to torment taylor swift?
anyway thats what id do if i met a genie
going to the dispensary and asking for the weed that makes u feel good instead of bad and brave instead of scared and the budtender laughs and looks at the other guys who all laugh and they call u a pussy and say what u can't handle the normal stuff but u say yeah no im looking for weed that is pleasant to smoke on & the guy goes to the back and pulls out a small wooden box labeled "weed that makes you feel good and brave" and says congratulations....no one has ever asked for it before, u won. have it for free. so u go home and roll up a big smoke & smoke on it & suddenly the room starts spinning ur vision fades to black and ur head hits the ground. u open ur eyes and sit up, ur not on the couch anymore this isn't ur house. u realize u are on a big boat, a boat in the middle of a vast ocean, and u are completely alone. for the first time in ur life u are alone absolutely, absolutely alone, there is no land in sight and no birds in the sky. the endless black sky. but if it is night time why are there no stars?
its called “ocd” because when you realize you have it you go “ohhhh crap… damn…”
Can everything you do be about me forever
you literally asked