izzy always knew she would never be perfect at parties. she didn't have wild stories like her sister and she had never been the best at small talk. but she never knew she would be this bad at it. staring at the ice in her empty drink like it were a crystal ball, like it would tell her the answer she's been searching for her entire life, her gaze is lifted when she hears zarrah's voice. "is that...all this is? fresh air?" she's down for some fresh air but with zarrah you can never know. does she want to sneak off or does she actually need to leave? or a little bit of both?
izzy probably wasn't the best person for zarrah to talk to right now. not when they had something going on that zarrah wasn't really sure about. she couldn't put into words how she felt, and now that izzy was here, zarrah was a little nervous about this, too, which was close to sending her over the edge. the question posed was a fair one, but zarrah thought she could handle it. play it cool, even. "i'll take whatever you can give me." zarrah offered. it wasn't really an answer, but it wasn't not an answer either. she wanted to apologize for being vague, but right now, she needed out of the room.
normally, kat was in the middle of the action. but who was kat to deny a damsel in distress? she made eye contact with zarrah by accident, but saw the desperation in her eyes and couldn't help but find her way, so accidentally, to her side. when the question was posed, kat nodded nonchalantly and then threw an arm around her friend and pulled her over to her. kat was taller, especially with heels on, so it made it easier for them to navigate through the crowd together. "we'll go outside, everything will be great." kat told zarrah loud enough to be heard over the music, the noise, and the overall giddiness of everyone's delight. once they found their way to the door, kat reached over and opened it, pushing the glass door open to let the two of them out. "am i a hero or what?"
it wasn't that zarrah was avoiding everyone in kennedy's band, but it wasn't not that she was either. as far as zarrah could tell, kennedy and kat were close. too close, but she tried not to ever be annoyed about it. she was cool. the coolest, even. "of course." she mustered as kat wrapped an arm around her and escorted her out and away from any paps that were trying to get a hold of either of them. kat was probably a hotter commodity, but zarrah knew her levels of fame weren't something to ignore either. "you're my hero. literally, genuinely, you've saved me." zarrah told kat as they walked to a space to sit outside. "thank you."
When Tatiana first laid eyes on their most recent ex, she was lucky to be standing near the toilets and fight her way through the queue. When the coast was finally clear, they slipped back into the crowd and looked for the nearest exit. But she was not exactly a person of great luck so, just as she'd reached Zarrah, they noticed the ex walking their way. Quickly, a smile spread into her cheeks, "Oh I will go just about anywhere with you right now, I need a cig real bad anyway let's uh," they took her under their arm and gently nudged the way forward. "Hey can you look over my shoulder real quick, see if there's a girl with a red pixie coming our way? 'Cause we might need to walk a bit faster if she is. Think of her as uh, as my very own version of Freddie Kreuger. Pretty sure one of these days she'll pop out of nowhere and kill me in my sleep."
zarrah could tell almost straight away that she had picked the right person for this mission of hers. she glanced behind them and saw the red pixie cut coming towards them. whoever it was looked like they were on a mission of their own. "we need to pick up the pace." she told them as zarrah wrapped an arm around their waist as to not be lost in the crowd without them. "we can probably lose her in that crowd if we move fast enough." zarrah pointed out as she tried to figure out an exit strategy for the two of them. no way manic pixie freddie kreuger was going to get them if zarrah had her way.
" are you okay? " her voice is soft, even under the thumping of the music and the hum of the crowd of the party surrounding them, but meera is sensible enough to make sure she's loud enough to be sure. parties were, in fact, her scene, but in the time since honeydew had crash-landed into her life, meera had learned they were decidedly not zarrah's. most of the time she prods her friend to stay out later, or go and they can leave if she's not having fun, but tonight, there's a certain weight of importance to the evening that makes her feel more tender. they're going to be pushing so much on tour, she wants to let this be. " we can go. do you want me to get you a glass of water? i only have stuff in my bottle spot already licked from his collapsible bowl. and that is not sanitary. "
zarrah was quick to nod, even if it was apparent that she wasn't okay by the request she had made. if she hadn't absolutely had to, zarrah probably wouldn't have come at all. it was rare that she was allowed to not attend an event however. and it would be unlikely that she would be allowed to do it in the future either. but even with a drink or two down, zarrah was still feeling anxious. the paps were frustrating to say the least and it was almost harder knowing that kennedy was there. somewhere. she just knew that she needed an exit strategy for now, to recharge her battery and breathe for a moment. "no, it's okay. maybe spot can fix me." she joked as they made their way towards the exit.
a part of her felt very, super out of her comfort zone. parties were a part of being 'famous' and she knew that. especially when the tour was, of course, partly about the band she was in. there wasn't a lot about fame that she hadn't yet realized. but fame and parties.... she could handle one but parties always made her feel a little uncomfortable. she worried about photographs that would come out and what her family might think if they saw her drinking or flirting or doing anything that didn't seem like the right thing to do. she just hoped her family didn't utilize the google alert option about her. the pap circling her and her bandmates didn't help ease her anxiety. especially as one approached her. "can you come get some fresh air with me?" she asked the person next to her with a pleading glance.
( ryan destiny, 29, cis woman, she/her ) ☆ all the way from DES MOINES, IA, supernova records is excited to welcome ZARRAH RHODES! as our resident FEMININOMENON, you remind us of pretty in pink, confidently terrified of rejection, infectious fun-loving energy, breaking free from a strict childhood, glitter is always a must. you’re also expected to be CONFIDENT and AMBITIOUS at all times. we know you tend to be MYSTERIOUS and DISTANT as well, but let’s do our best to keep that under wraps, okay? we look forward to ensuring you shine under our guidance!
general info
name: zarrah rhodes.
nickname(s): zar, z.
age/d.o.b: 29, february 13th.
hometown: des moines, ia.
zodiac: aquarius.
gender/pronouns: cis woman, she/her.
orientation: gay, closeted.
relationship status: single.
occupation: singing lead/dancer in honeydew.
BACKGROUND
born and raised in iowa, zarrah lived a particularly sheltered life with her family.
her mom was a teacher who taught both bible study and kindergarten. her dad was a preacher who took his job very seriously.
in all fairness, her parents were kind to her. they just had more conservative beliefs that instilled the worry of rejection if she were to ever come out. and she knew from a young age that she was gay.
but she's gotten better at 'hiding it' or at least she thinks she has. the older she gets, the more she wishes she didn't have to hide.
she still has weekly phone calls with her parents to this day because they do love her so much and are so excited about her journey (if a little concerned, given she's unmarried) even if they don't fully understand it.
additionally, to add more fuel to the fire, zarrah believes herself to be agnostic so she doesn't really feel the same way that her parents do. but they're doting and they're so loving, she worries that the new information would change their love.
recentlyish, zarrah attempted to date a man and though the relationship wasn't bad, she wasn't feeling any of it.
deep down, she knows that she'd only ever marry a woman/afab nonbinary person. because she's g a y.
she has probably written songs about women but made them sound like they're about men. this should go in the headcanon channel but i'm thinking of it now.
headcanons
to be edited
character interview
tell us about yourself! where are you from and what has your life been like before now? a: "i'm from des moines! which is a place that i think most people wouldn't know, but it has every season and it's something that i miss sometimes when i'm away on the west coast nowadays. i'm the child of a teacher and a preacher -- i know it, it even rhymes. i love my family to pieces, but they haven't been the happiest about my journey!" she laughs, but in reality, she's horrified by her parents seeing this or any interview. it's increasingly difficult to balance between the performance version of herself and the real one.
what inspired you to become a musician? a: "well my mama always told me that i was born with the voice of an angel. but in all honesty, i've always thought everyone has a story or two to tell, mine is just done through song." there is a piece of her, one locked away, that wants for nothing more than to be her real self. zarrah just isn't ready for that.
is there anything about you that you think would surprise the fans? a: "i love to crochet. i know, i know but bad bitches do crochet." zarrah is certain that her fans would be either discomfited or lost if they found out that she wasn't straight. but even zarrah is having trouble stomaching that information. it lingers, echoing, like a ghost that will not stop haunting her.
if you had to have another job, what would it be? a: "maybe i'd follow in my mom's footsteps and be a teacher. i've always liked to help others, and i think it's really special to be a part of a kid's life to help them grow and mold the future." zarrah has no idea who she would be if she wasn't who she was now. she is certain that she would be more lost than she is now.
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