*x-files theme song*

my name is orion. [they/her] scorpio moon/sun/mercury. sagittarius mars/venus.

[treuedeutschefrau]

[dabwax-deactivated20250410]

Facebook sometimes isn’t a terrible place

[ejacutastic]

[smeasel]

protecting and serving looks

[norwayspruce]

making me look at this is police brutality

[swarnpert]

if you stand outside of a vape shop and smoke a regular cigarette the owner walks outside and assassinates you

[casanova-lives]

Is this real? Will that actually happen?

[gamarai-archive-deactivated2020]

yes it happened to me once

[maxthetiny]

what’s that shit in your blood? homo goblin?

[greatqueerator]

that’s the bitch

[breadbank-deactivated20240125]

sorry i’m late i forgot i existed

[twerklina]

[zsnes]

idk if tony hawk is pro state a lot of skaters are anarchist

[zsnes]

hold on

[whitepeopletwitter]

[achillesvevo-deactivated2020090]

[yamitamiko]

me, holding a pizza box and shouting: SUE!

customer walks up

me: sue?

customer opens the box, frowns, and sticks her finger in the pizza: i didn’t order pepperoni

me, with a voice devoid of any emotion: ……. sue?

customer: oh! no i’m (name)!

the actual sue, materializing at my elbow: is that a pizza for sue?

me: would you like some free breadsticks to eat while we remake you pizza? another customer touched it

‘another customer’ sheepishly mumbles sorry

sue, who has clearly worked with the public: you take as long as you need to, honey

[tygermama]

Bless you, Sue

[chavisory]

The most egregious iteration of this I’ve ever heard was from a friend, who was in her doctor’s office waiting room, and when the nurse called her name, she started to get up, but then another, older woman did.

And she kind of thought “Oh, weird,” but she does have a relatively common first name so she didn’t think that much about it.

A few minutes later the nurse reappears and exasperatedly calls my friend’s name again.

The other woman had decided to try to pretend to be her in order to get in to see the doctor faster.

[fullmetaljackit]

once i was babysitting my neighbor’s 6 year old and she asked me why i was so ugly and without thinking i said “i’m you from the future” and she cried for like 30 minutes

[teenscoolest]

[grosezero]

You can insult the amish online all you want because they will never know 

[sldg02-deactivated20260205]

[joshpeck]

[pricepayer]

no i am going to do coke

[donotusetheinternet-deactivated]

Im physically crying

[niclasvonschedvin-blog]

[zappavolta]

oh shit MCDONALDS but with WEED AHHHHHHH

[gahdamnpunk]

Some places don’t even name the charity like you’re just donating to the corporation’s tax writeoff. You’re better off giving that money to a homeless person on the street who needs it more..