Kpop Fans and their Parasocial Hatred for Kiss Of Life
Hear me out.
I’m not Black, I'm Asian, so I won’t try to defend Kiss Of Life's actions as cultural appreciation or whatever. I’m mainly talking about the internet’s response and what I see.
Kiof got an unjustified amount of hate for that one birthday livestream. I swear I'm not biased. I became a Kissy like a day or two before 224 came out (June 9th). When the live first happened (March), I was still new to Kpop, so I was just hanging out in the background watching the hate train form overnight. I didn't know the context of what they did or who they were, so, like the ignorant haters who just choose to hate, I didn't try that hard to figure out what was happening. I never actively searched for them, and I was still hearing people complain about them like a toxic ex. The hate for them in the beginning was mostly normal (I'm assuming), but after a while people started taking it too far. Pointing out what they did and how it was wrong is good, but when Kiof had to be taken out of an Kcon event because of death threats (late May) was when the hate stopped being only about racism.
If anyone cares, here's a post that gives context
If you're unable to accept Kiof's four apologies, then nothing’s going to make you stop being a hater if your mind’s already made up about them. If you think apologizing doesn’t change your fact that they’re racist, then every idol who’s done something racist should get the same treatment.
A lot of the haters are hypocrites who flame Kiof for racism, but then ignore/defend their own idols for doing something similar. Other fandoms only have one defense saying that groups like BTS, Stray Kids, P1Harmony NCT, Xdinary Heroes, and Ateez apologized, but so did Kiof. But unlike them, Kiof did it once, apologized four times, and actually stopped, while others could get away with it after doing something racist multiple times spread over a period of more than one day. Why is it so much more normalized and acceptable when it's anyone but them?
Life ✨gozon✨ if people support Kiss Of Life, too.
The only semi-valid excuse BTS has is the BLM stuff they did, but what does a group like Ateez have? This is why I stopped being an Atiny, The fandom isn't big enough for the people with brains and morals to have a platform like some Armys do.
Mamamoo is another girl group I like, and when Solar went ‘viral’ for her KPDH cover, people coming out of nowhere to harp on one racist incident from nearly a decade ago. That only strengthens my belief that the majority don’t care about the racism and just want to profit off a woman’s success. In contrast, people have been consistent with hating on Tarzzan, but for girl groups, it only happens when they do something big that could give people the opening to be haters to profit off the attention.
I wasn't there for Mamamoo's incident, but the way people are talking about it is extremely similar to the way people try to attack Kiof. With how hating on things are basically becoming a trend to people, I have a feeling that the majority hating on them don’t actually care about the racism and just want to bully random women for clout. And the ways they do it is, in my opinion, worse than anything Kiof did. The haters over exaggerated their actions, treating it like they’re as bad as or worse than Seungri, Taeil, NAZIS, or the KKK, sent death threats, made distasteful deepfakes/edits, calling them whores, harassed them, villainized them further, and spread misinformation. To me, it's kinda weird how some people think racism is worse than rape. Kpop has always been racist, hating on only Kiof won't change anything. And does anyone actually remember what they did specifically to cause them to get a significant amount of hate compared to others? The hate isn't even a tread anymore, it's a lifestyle for people to get hit tweets.
People are always yelling at companies to protect their idols, but when Kiof's did when they were getting death threats, people started acting like victims as if they lost all ability to be able to be upset. There's nothing stopping them from expressing their anger for what Kiof did, but some chose to go about it in ways where the company had to take legal action.
On Twitter/TikTok, I've seen people bring up Kiof at any opportunity, making drama out of everything even when it doesn't have anything to do with racism. It's so obvious they're just using Kiof to get hit tweets/posts
Some notable examples:
calling them pick-mes for having facial expressions
If they thought she did the tongue thing for attention, it worked. She got their attention. And what does being a pick-me have anything to do with racism?
2. using their hate train to lift other groups for something irrelevant
I just want to complain about Evols for a minute. Why do I feel like the majority of them don't actually care about Xlov's music and just like their concept? The way fans talk about them, the members really aren't treated like they have their own identities and are just caricatures of pretty boys. Also, like some Evols of pointed out, Xlov's concept is genderless. The people who only use she/her pronouns for them feels like they really want to like women, but don't know how.
3. prioritizing hating Kiof instead of supporting their own group/using Kiof to promote their own group
(notice how the hate tweet got more likes than total album sales)
Here's a thread of other moments
Kiof was offensive once. People have been endlessly attacking them for more than six months. If you really hated them for the live, focus on the live and actually explain what exactly you find offensive instead of just calling them "black queens" or "Kiss Of Africa".
The single live doesn't define them as people. Don't try to act like anyone has never done/said/thought something racist, even unintentionally. I already said that a lot of idols have done racist stuff, but fans aren't really any better. Haters are trying so hard to make the group racist that they themselves are being racist to do it.
Here are some examples
discrediting other cultures
2. using racism as jokes/comebacks
3. a post with 31k likes saying that being Black automatically makes you a prop to Kiof
I don't want to pull the misogyny card, but it's pretty much inevitable at this point. Maybe everyone just hates women, including other women who then turn around and glaze men.
On a somewhat unrelated note, this goes for all fandoms, but people would rather call feminine/androgynous cisgender men women instead of actually supporting real women. I swear I'm not transphobic. If Xlov's concept actually reflected their identity as people or if they were trans, I wouldn't care about the comparisons. Men are allowed to show more of their personality and act like a normal person, but if a woman did that, they’d get hate. When a woman expresses themself/acts ‘quirky’, they’re called a pick-me, but when a male does it, everyone thinks it’s cute or funny. If a woman is caughting acting like this, they'd constantly be flamed online. I thought Wonyoung was like 24 with how often she got cancelled, but no, everyone just hates her for being herself. Red Velvet and Mamamoo used to get a lot of hate for being feminists, yet RM, San, and many other male idols are praised for being one (aka 'respecting' women), too.
If you don’t like the group and think they’re racist, that opinion is valid. If you unstanned because of that, good job on putting your values first, I did the same with Seventeen. You can be upset and hate them all you want, but why do they still need to talk about them after all this time, especially on posts that are pro-Kiof? I don't like Svt anymore bc they support a groomer, but I don't feel the need to leave a hate comment on every video about them.
Kiof’s K Bye is directed towards the people who can’t let go. I feel like the line ‘do you wish my lacking love in your mind all the time?’ sums up everything I’ve said. What’s the point in hanging around and making yourself miserable? It’s like if Kiof was an ex who hurt you personally, and you decide to spend the rest of your days bullying that ex, plus their friends, family and partners just because you couldn't handle the possibility of others being happy without you. Or if you despise a teacher you once had, they're not gonna die if you hate them long enough.
Antis are also trying to ruin Kiof's relationships with other idols. Here's a specific example: Atinys always say Wooyoung would protest against something he disagrees with, but when the fans dislike his choice, they then turn around and act like he was being held at gun point to be around Natty. When he did a dance challenge with her, people were saying that he was forced to by the company, but a lot of idols don't seem to care about that issue as much as fans do. J-Hope and Jungkook still follow Kiof on Tiktok, J-Hope reposted Julie’s dance, and if you watch any dance challenges/collabs with other idols, including Wooyoung, they all seem comfortable around Kiof.
I guess you can't spell atiny without anti
How does someone else choosing to accept their apology affect you? You can be upset and have your own morals, but It's still their choice, like how it's your choice to leave. No one's forcing them to restan or do anything and there's no reason to go into pro-Kiof spaces just to spread hate
Here's a poorly made meme to understand what I mean
You’re just giving the group free promotion and using their hate train as an easy way to get more attention for yourself. This is where all your hard work got you.
This post isn't trying to get the people to like Kiss Of Life or make them out to be flawless angels, I just want to point out the unfair treatment they got compared to other groups and the hypocrisy within Kpop fandoms.
Despite it all, Kissys have been the best Kpop fandom I’ve been a part of. After everything they've been through, they basically turned into a Kband fandom. The remaining people are traumabonded together and are like a family. Most are pretty positive, especially with all the ragebait thrown at them. Kissys don't compain, defend the group when necessary, and call out hypocrites.
I honestly can't tell anymore if all the hate is from genuinely upset people or if it's just ragebait. If you don't like them, don't waste your time engaging with everything they do.
This is about TwoSetViolin and Blinks, but it could easily be about some Kiof antis
