What I like about Nesta, is that she hides her insecurities so well and she does not want people to know just how vulnerable she really is and how much she truly feels. She hides her pain, her feelings behind ice and thorns. And behind ‘I don’t care’.
Anyone who looks carefully at Nesta, who knows what its like to have to hide that part of themselves, know where Nesta is coming from.
Her “I don’t care.” is my “I’m fine.”
She was raised in a home where warmth was secondary. She had wealth, until it was taken away. She had her family, but her family was not close. I think Nesta might resemble her mother most. And (I could be wrong) but I got such a fairly ‘cold’ vibe when Feyre talked about her mother before her mother’s death.
Nesta is the oldest, she probably remembers her mother the best (outside her father) and her mother was taken from her. As someone who lost her mother, a mother who wasn’t exactly warm, it takes something from you. That death and that lack of warmth. It gives you barriers that you dont want anyone breaking. And you put up this front, to show you are ‘fine’ and that you do not care how people or events affect you.
Nesta doesn’t know how to handle people who see her truly. Or people who show genuine feelings about her or for her. Her gut instinct is to say ‘i don’t care’ when it comes to the insults placed against her. Whether it be something said to her, or something done against her.
She shows up at the manor house, or rather dragged there by Cassian, under Feyre’s orders. Nesta takes note of all the paintings in the house. All these paintings made by Feyre and there is not. A single. One of. Nesta.
Her dad, a useless man who felt sorry for himself who sat on his ass and let his family starve and lose their fortune for years, just staring at a fire and making stupid wood carvings, got a painting. Him and Elain.
Mor got paintings, Cassian, Azriel, Rhys, everyone. But Nesta.
Elain treated Feyre just as bad as Nesta. Maybe she wasn’t outright as vicious in words, but she let Feyre go out and hunt, she let Feyre skin the animals and take care of everyone and get them money. And like Nesta, Elain had no problem spending the money.
Elains PTSD made her this soft thing that needs protected or what fucking ever. “Elain is Elain’ is the biggest fucking bullshit excuse in regards to how Rhys views the treatment of Feyre.
Feyre’s PTSD was horrible, yes. She was wasting away and depressed and that is awful. Yes.
But Nesta’s PTSD? It made her spiteful, and cruel and she shows these so blatantly aggressive symptoms where shes basically killing herself and because its not the soft and sweet pretty PTSD that Feyre or Elain had, people keep their distance. No one is looking beneath the surface to see just how much this woman is suffering.
Nesta is prideful and hates sycophantic people. It’s been said so often how much she hates these people. And where is she now? Her pride is in ruins, she was living off money her sister gave her. She was living in the fucking slums and is now self medicating because she feels nothing. This prideful woman who would never take handouts, is doing that now and no one seems to understand just how much she is self destructing to do something like this.
NESTA ARCHERON’S ‘I DON’T CARE’ IS MY ‘I’M FINE.’ AND SHE DESERVES SO MUCH BETTER THAN THIS.
prguitarman
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
origamiaround
titsay
snowghoul
theartofmadeline
