you're only a cut of the vagabond

"seeing stuff you reblogged is always like sip of crisp clear water." - the-lady-of-the-cake. "lmao this is really good" -cosmere-cat. "too fucking funny" -pikesprouts. "all bangers all the time" -epsilonics. background and pfp by me

[fiollaigean]

my beloved brother the mandolin my dearest sister the banjo my gentle mother the guitar my loving father the bass my childhood sweetheart the fiddle

[fiollaigean]

my best friend the flatfooter

[albertserra]

They wanna say the word so bad

[thecolorsfucked]

thats not a fag thats a canvasser for clean water action

[largishcat]

this is like the boy version of “this is the butchest girl twitter can handle before they start getting scared.” that is a masc guy wearing a daisy pin

[fiollaigean]

I know the article looks cringe but I read it and it was actually quite thoughtful.

[supreme-leader-stoat]

DNI if you've ever:

Been to Greenland

Been to Denver

Buried treasure in St. Louis (or St. Paul for that matter)

Been to Moscow

Been to Tampa

Been to Boston (only if you went during the fall, though)

Hoisted a mainstay

Swabbed a poop deck

Veered to starboard

You know what just DNI if you've ever sailed at all

Walked a gangplank

Owned a parrot (I shouldn't have to explain this one)

Been to Boston in the fall (cannot overstate this)

[edgar-allan-possum]

Okay, but what if I've never plucked a rooster and I'm not too good at ping-pong, and I've never thrown my mashed potatoes up against the wall, and I've never kissed a chipmunk and I've never gotten head lice, and I've never been to Boston in the fall?

[supreme-leader-stoat]

You're safe

[diabowlicat]

But what if I've never licked a spark plug, and I've never sniffed a stink bug, and I've never painted daisies on a big red rubber ball, and I've never bathed in yogurt, and I don't look good in leggings?

[supreme-leader-stoat]

But have you been to Boston in the fall?

[vinceaddams]

It's nice that loud noises don't stick to clothes like smells do. That would be really bad if they did.

[nonlynear]

the losing dogs and i are engaging in insider trading

[animentality]

[ovenroastedtwerkey]

A grill worth fighting for

[albertserra]

They wanna say the word so bad

[thecolorsfucked]

thats not a fag thats a canvasser for clean water action

[largishcat]

this is like the boy version of “this is the butchest girl twitter can handle before they start getting scared.” that is a masc guy wearing a daisy pin

[auroradiation]

Chord.

print

print

[cheshireinthemiddle]

Oh, this definitely belongs on Tumblr.

[thesplendidsnout]

From the Nib, by Mattie Lubchansky

[lake-erie]

this year’s prom theme is… *opens envelope* Great Lakes Invasive Species And What Boaters Can Do To Stop Them

[football-in-tuxedos]

And the subject of tonight’s ecology panel is *turns on powerpoint* Enchantment Under the Sea

[thememedaddy]

[another-random-dom-4]

I think they're right. If a woman asked me this, I'd think about it for a minute, and then I'd want to know if she meant what these three jobs were really like (I'm assuming she means taking on one of these roles in the past, since while there are still cowboys and pirates, samurai haven't really existed since the Meiji Restoration), or how they're imagined in pop-culture. If it's the actual, real job, I'm gonna say cowboy, because the other two are different kinds of assholes who kill people, whereas cowboy is, mostly, just fucking hard work. If it's the pop-culture versions, I'm gonna say pirate, because they generally enjoy themselves more than the other two, particularly since samurai spend all their time doing as they're told, fighting nobly etc. and being a cowboy is still a lot of fucking hard work.

And from this, the lady would easily be able to tell that my true personality is that of a pedantic nerd.

[cat-the-comet]

devastating: artist who has not practiced fundamentals enough to execute high concept idea eats shit

[demiboydemon]

For speed runners, this is canon.

[demiboydemon]

[muscleluvr4-deactivated20140223]

why the fuck is it called the xbox 360 what does 360 mean???????????????????

[wariolands-blog]

when u see it u turn 360 degrees and walk away

[viseriontargaryen]

turning 360 degrees would face you right back to the xbox you dipshit

[davekat-deactivated20130315-dea]

[btc-official-deactivated2024071]

this post somehow still in circulation despite everyone involved being deactivated

[rain-droplet]

even you

[hufflepuffharukananase]

Even me

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

anyway I was having this very vivid and unaccountably funny dream about what I suppose you would call a heist crew, except their MO was less about stealing and more about breaking into rich shitheads' houses to throw absolute ragers and trash the place and then disappear into the night. it was all very sleek and admittedly even sexy but the main thing I remember about this dream is that the leader of the group, who's exactly the kind of smooth young hotshot you think he is, was always in the process of getting spectacularly dumped at these parties. always a different woman. months of planning and stress and then when he should be in his element kicking back, accepting congratulations on all sides, man of the hour, he's getting dumped. again. and his whole crew is watching with a very low amount of sympathy because they love the guy but ooooh they know better than anyone that he deserves this. what the fuck was my subconscious cooking with this.

[haverst]