The Village Ophelia

Patron Saint of Scraped Knees. Retired baby model. I like peach oatmeal, cats, lipstick, and tea. blog est. 2009. Born in 1994.

[applebutterbabie]

Love seeing little pawprints. So fucking magical. There was a little guy here.

[earthangeal]

Sofia Coppola's home office by Bruce Weber, 2000

[barelyatouch]

<33

[nerdexpress]

The sexiest thing a man has ever said is this Bela Lugosi quote about women loving horror

[eyestrain-addict]

[rozzed]

why not have the reader re-read a sentence now and then? it won't hurt him....

[carys-the-ninth]

The problem with commercial F/M romance is that it's written by the most heterosexual women alive and reading it you feel yourself slowly suffocating from the Gender of it all like a fish in a eutrophying lake. And what we actually need as a culture is F/M written by insane bisexuals violently allergic to heteronormativity

[resetmyfeelings]

[40ouncesandamule]

this post had everything I could hope for

[fictionadventurer]

The very best thing about The Phantom of the Opera is that it shows us a possibly supernatural occurrence, then gives us a natural explanation that is infinitely crazier than the supernatural one would have been.

What if there was a ghost in the opera house that was killing people?

Requires you to accept the existence of ghosts, but otherwise is a straightforward story.

What if the chief contractor who built the opera house was a deformed circus freak who used his experience building palaces and torture chambers for sultans to keep building secret passageways and torture chambers in the basement when construction halted during the Franco-Prussian War, and then kept living down there working on an opera and killing and blackmailing people who crossed him and also training a pretty opera singer that he wants to marry?

There is nothing in the world that could have prepared me to expect even half of that.

[cat-dragoness]

@o-lei-o-lai-o-lord you are so right about this

[musicalhell]

Honestly, this explains so much about Christine's perspective too when you think about it.

My father sent me a guardian angel from Heaven to guide and comfort me in his absence: "Okay, not something that happens every day, but that is what guardian angels are supposed to do and Dad did indicate something like this would happen."

A hideously disfigured renaissance man, having all the natural skills and education to build himself a secret villain lair in a public building, extort enormous amounts of money from its management, and convince everyone he's a ghost, has developed a massive crush on me and has decided to express that through manipulation, kidnapping, and murder: "I cannot even begin to tell you how much this was not on my Bingo card."

[comicgeekscomicgeek]

Well then.

[batzzzzz]

Rool

[citrusmillie]

all tumbrlinas come from a common ancestor

[carolsturka]

[exeggcute]

I need a polite and effective way to say "hey your heart is truly in the right place and your anger is often righteous but I think sometimes you’re getting recreationally mad about things that are frankly not worth the amount of energy you’re spending on them, and every time you do this you're driving yourself slightly more insane with nothing to show for it," and then I need a way to broadcast that message through a loudspeaker to roughly 30,000 people at once, and THEN I need a time machine to send that message to my past self lol. and maybe a second time machine in case past me tries to be clever and sabotage the version of me who comes through the first time machine

[knownqueerbaiter]

strapjobs r awesome bc u can lowkey chew it a little if u want

[thememedaddy]

[bunniope]

hey thanks for calling me your "loyal knight" now i'm horny enough to win any battle

[angelicdewdrop]

[spiribia]

one of my favorite glados gags is she keeps pretending she went places. she's like i went outside today. girl you did not go anywhere.

[transfem-juice]

[electricsheepdoctor]

Every time I type "liek" instead of "like" I can feel the specter of mid-2000s memes passing through me like someone walking over my grave.

[electricsheepdoctor]

In my restless dreams, I see him.