What happens when you love each other but you can’t be together? Sounds cliché, right? But there’s no lonelier feeling.
Maybe it’s true that love isn’t enough. Sometimes, circumstances separate you. Sometimes, distance does. You care about each other so much that you can’t spend a day without talking to one another. There’s only one problem—you don’t have the means to meet, or move, or live in the same area. You want to, but life says you can’t. Sometimes, being a hopeless romantic doesn’t cut it and you have to face reality that for one of you, it can’t work.
But at some point in time, you saved each other from loneliness. You loved each other right at the moment when both of you needed to be loved. You were, at a point in your lives when your orbits intersected, exactly what the other needed. You were star-crossed.
So you still spend every day pretending like everything is fine, but both knowing fully well that you’re going to replace each other when you meet someone closer. You wonder if there is anyone at all who is just like them, or maybe better. Someone whom you can love and accept, but more importantly, someone who can love and accept you, flaws and all. You hope to be happier with someone else.
You wonder, can someone else actually have the voice of an angel that you fell in love with in the first place? Can someone else have your favourite nose? Or those sad eyes that remind you everyday that you shouldn’t get too moody or you’ll make them even sadder. Can someone else kiss you the way those perfect lips do? Can someone else have the same scarred hand—one that told stories when it touched your own scars? And when that hand held yours, it felt like the happiest place on earth.
You pray and trust that there will be. Otherwise, this would have worked. For now, you still talk, you still call, you still tell each other all your secrets and trust them with all your heart. For now. Even if it hurts to think that they’re ready and looking for something new, while you’re stuck patiently waiting for what life will give you. For now, you’re okay with it. Because it’s better to have someone than to have no one. Because it’s better to call them your best friend than to be in love.
You dread the feeling of replacing them and being replaced, but you know it’s going to happen one day. It’s only a question of who, between you, becomes the lonely one again first.