Field of Flowers

No discourse, just comics :)

[fof-plural]

We've never really gotten into drawing before, but after seeing a whole bunch of little system comics on here (I'd link them all but there's like ten of them I keep up with at this point), we thought maybe we could get past the constant need for perfectionism and just get some low effort doodles down on paper to share with the world!

Art has always been a passion for us in it's many forms, but this will be the first time we've tried drawing, so go easy on us as we find our style :)

I suppose I should give a brief introduction for us all (under pseudonyms for privacy), so from left to right we have:

Pink (she/it) - That's me writing all this, the current host and resident dumbass stumbling through the concept of not being alone.

Blue (it/she) - Soft spoken maid with the angel autism who helps us get through all the cooking and cleaning required to stay alive.

White (they/any) - Co-host genderfuck extraordinaire obsessed with singing and showmanship, gives us that confidence boost we always need.

Yellow (she/her) - Stuffie-loving ray of sunshine that always tends to find the bright side of life even in our darkest times.

Red (she/they) - Persecutor but not really, mostly just tired of me being a dumbass and can be a real softie under the tough exterior.

Purple (she/her) - Internal protector who doesn't speak or front, pretty much exclusively communicates through bodily functions like twitching.

Orange (she/they) - Never really shows up except when we're reading, pretty dormant the rest of the time, loves reading, did I mention she likes reading? That's like her whole thing.

Anyways, we're probably not gonna be posting here too often because of our busy schedule, but we'll be sure to stop by every once in a while and share some funny (maybe somewhat relatable) experiences!

This is primarily a lighthearted blog, but if we do decide to share some heavier content, we'll be sure to give the proper warnings! As such, please don't bring any discourse here, I don't want to have to block anyone or disable comments, so play nice, okay? Thanks.

And thanks for even reading this far! I hope you enjoy the silly little concoctions my brain stirs up every now and then, enjoy <3

Pink, Field of Flowers

[leathersys]

so... we may have made something.

have YOU ever thought like this?????? i know WE hate the current plural diagnostics!!!! so! WE MADE OUR OWN!!!!!!!

it's 50 questions long, you can receive a total of 55 points!

Plural Checklist

*Due to how Google Forms is built, your "System Percentage" is shown as your amount of correct answers. Plural systems typically get a score

we are not doctors, do not take your result as medical advice.

feel free to reblog with your result!

Please read this reblog if you have a concern about the nature of the questions!!

edit: notifications are going off for this post! thank you all!❤️❤️

[fof-plural]

100%..... yeah that checks out lol

- Pink, Field of Flowers

[wiingdings]

*(it's what they call "you".)

(please reblog instead of liking)

[orangerysystem]

critical memory failure on our part!

[theseus-system]

You exclude several key elements of what happened, I will say

[orangerysystem]

whoops

[fof-plural]

Shout out to all my fellow Canadian plurals who know exactly where this is. Is this what representation feels like?

Pink, Field of Flowers

[fof-plural]

hi!

would it be alright if we recreate the mirror mirror comic with our own system?? :3

@wo1vespack

Go ahead! I don't own any of the ideas for the comics I post, half of them are inspired by other plural comic creators anyway!

If you do get inspired by my comics and wanna make your own based on them, feel free to tag me (not because I want credit, but because I just really like seeing more plural comics lol)

Pink, Field of Flowers

[fof-plural]

My gf has understood itself as plural for slightly over a year now, but with a new influx of alters, a dissociative barrier keeping two of them away from the other four, a lot of the questions you post about also seem to be going through its mind.

Is there something a singlet (me) could do to help with these things? Especially pertaining transition, as it's in the same situation as you

Genuinely, I have no idea. But I suppose I can try.

A few years back when I still understood myself as a singlet, I had plural friends I wanted to be supportive of, but I didn't really understand what it was they were going through. My perception of what it's like to be plural was skewed enough that I thought for sure it could never be something that applies to me. All I could really do was take the basic advice I'd heard over and over again, treat alters as their own people, refer to them the same way you would anybody else you meet. I always relate it back to being trans, it's the simple everyday things that matter, like using the right pronouns and name, no matter how small and obvious it sounds.

Is that enough? I'm not sure, I'm very new to being out as plural around my group of close friends, some of which didn't know anything about plurality before my shaky attempts at explaining it.

But they're supportive, they don't bring it up around people who don't know, they don't push me to explain any more than I have, they let us take it at our own pace. And I think that's all I could ever really ask for.

We're not at the point where we've felt comfortable expressing ourselves separately in more than just small ways, but I have the feeling that as we come out to more and more people around us, we'll be able to not worry as much about that and just be ourselves. We've told our friends that and it means the world to us that they're willing to listen to me explaining this strange experience to them.

I keep coming back to it, but it really does remind me of being out as queer and trans. You get those funny awkward questions from those who don't know much about it, the ones that are clearly trying to be supportive even if they sound weird.

Is there anything else I'd want them to do? I think I'd like it if they asked questions more often. Maybe they think it would be rude to ask who they're talking to, and maybe that's entirely on me for assuming that wouldn't be how they think. I think I'd like to be able to give them more information, just rant about us and explain everything I possibly could to help them understand (we actually have a day planned soon to do exactly this) instead of me always assuming people don't want to hear about it.

If I think about it like that, I don't think I can give you any advice that isn't just general communication advice. Ask questions, assume it wants the answers to be known, and if not, let it take this at its own pace. Let the rants happen, if there's something you want to know, try to know.

Maybe this is the autism in me, but I don't see fault in rejection. If you ask a question and somebody says no, it's not your fault for asking. Be upfront, say what you mean. Communication is about not hiding, and not hiding means actively sharing. My biggest regret since coming out as plural to my friends is telling them to look up plural terms so I didn't have to try explaining them. I was scared, shy, and saying that went against my core belief that labels mean nothing unless you know what they mean to the people that take them on.

So yeah, all that ranting to say: ask questions and don't be afraid of the answers. If that makes any sense at all. People are complex, feelings are terrifying, but knowing others and being known is one of the greatest highs we can get in this life, so it's pretty damn worth the effort.

Pink, White and Blue, Field of Flowers

[fof-plural]

09 - Mirror Mirror

CW: Bodily insecurities, dysphoria, existential fears, and... internal violence? used for comedic effect? idk what the term is for that, let me know if you do.

A little bit of a heavier one today, really using this blog as a kind of journal to write my thoughts down. I hope you enjoy? Is that weird to say? Maybe you find it relatable, maybe not, maybe you wanna yell at me and call me a dumbass in the comments, jokes on you, that's engagement babyyyy >:)

We all react differently to seeing how we look, could be why most of us prefer to be fronting only when alone in our dark room, and usually sitting or laying down because a few of us feel weird being the wrong height physically.

I think it's really hard to identify with the body for us since we only discovered we were plural after being a few years into transitioning (one identity crisis into another, lucky us!) so we always tend to see the body as that particular person who had the most responsibility for our transition. Our legal name is Pink's name, the name we use with everybody is Pink's name, it's hard to not think of her as the body's identity, after all that's what we transitioned for.

I never identified with the body pretransition. I was in a constant state of derealization and dissociation without any sense of identity until a certain pandemic happened that gave me an excuse to grow out my hair for the first time in my life. We're coming up on our 4th HRT anniversary soon, and I can safely say that I did not feel like a person until transitioning, no wonder we never figured out our plurality until after that.

When I look in the mirror now, I see how far I've come. I see a body that I identify with, a face that doesn't disgust me like it used to. But in having this sense of self reflected in the mirror, we lose any chance of having others feel the same. That scares me.

It's a tricky situation, you can only ever look like a single person at a time. We have a few tricks like wearing our hair in different ways and dressing up in different types of clothes that give us a good approximation of being more than just Pink, but it's still hard. It's only ever that one person we've become when we look in the mirror. It's hard, and we don't have an answer.

We're not that far into our journey figuring ourselves out. I still feel like I write and draw these posts without the proper input from the rest of us. I can't escape that feeling of being "the default". But that's the honest answer, I don't know how to do this properly. I can read up on everything you should and shouldn't do, but ultimately I'm not perfect. I'm scared. I finally see myself in my reflection, I've reached the goalpost that trans people strive for every day, and it's terrifying to think of giving any part of that up.

To look more like us, that could mean looking less like me. To have us all here working together could mean I front less. It could mean less control. It could mean remembering less of my days. It could mean giving up parts of what I've worked so hard these past four years to achieve, and when I've come so far it's hard not to interpret that negatively. I know it would help us, I know Red thinks I'm selfish for putting myself above the rest of us, and I know it's something I need to make peace with if we're ever going to heal.

But it's hard, and I'm scared.

Pink, Field of Flowers

[pluralcomics]

Not to yap on this sideblog (it's only meant for comics, after all) but I feel like this is somehow related to the comics so idk. I love love love how many comics about plurality have been popping up lately. It's so nice reading about others' experiences in simple drawings, in little stories. (Personally for us) I can't thank enough @oursystemblog for the huge inspiration your comics brought us, how we lost some of the fear of being ourselves because of your comics. How we started processing everything easier while drawing little anecdotes. Other inspirations for this blog and great comics we've found are @creaturesofthecreek, @changelingcoded, @lyter-system, @labyrinthwalkers, @alteredpanel, @semiplural, @mycavesystem, @periodic-sys-comics, @pipeupcomic and many, many others. (Check out their comics, they're great!)

Thank you, plural community, for bringing us a place to be ourselves and speak up about who we are.

[pluralcomics]

AHAHHAGSGEGEGEGGE THANK YOU SO MUCH

[pluralcomics]

I'm gonna update this post with other comics we've found lately! @the-flock-of-feathers, @thesolarguild, @daemon-company, @pluralfluid, @our-everyday-journal, @asmilingsystem, @my-systems-doodles, @switchplural, @theseus-system, @terriblemultiple, @sporks-scribblez, @partially-split-comix, @pluralcoded, @fof-plural. These are great comic with a similar vibe to ours and others we've tagged already.

(If you don't wish to be tagged, send me an ask or a dm, we don't mind!)

[fof-plural]

Genuinely I've been loving keeping up with all the plural comics, so many of the ones listed in this post are the reasons why we decided to pick up our drawing tablet and start creating and posting our art even though we think it looks terrible, something about being a part of a community that just exists to put out dumb little doodles about our experiences is so heartwarming. I love the comics that we relate to, I love the comics that we don't, I love the high quality comics, I love the silly napkin doodles, I love the stories, I love the educational posts.

Thank you to each and every plural comic blog for doing what you do, you're genuinely the only reason we use tumblr at all and I'm genuinely honoured to be mentioned in the same post as all our inspirations.

Pink, Field of Flowers

[fof-plural]

Was scrolling through plural tags again today and then stumbled across one of our own comics. What the fuck? How???

Pink, Field of Flowers

[fof-plural]

08 - Food Summoning

Sometimes when food just shows up out of nowhere I start to think being plural isn't too bad actually, I get my own personal maid which is pretty cool.

Pink, Field of Flowers

[fof-plural]

She really enjoys doing laundry. Makes her feel like a proper maid.

Pink, Field of Flowers

Indeed it does, it is quite calming in fact. The motions are repetitive and it can get in the zone while feeling productive.

Blue, Field of Flowers

[fof-plural]

06 - First Time?

Well, guess we found our Indigo. It's kinda funny since we technically already have a green that's inactive so we really have just completed the whole rainbow with this one. Really funny how immediately after starting a plural comic we get the first alter formed in months. I don't think we've ever discovered two alters the same way, pretty funny how that works.

I don't have much to say here really, I'm writing this as Pokémon Legends Z-A is about to drop in an hour so my mind isn't focused on this at all, do with this information as you will.

Pink, Field of Flowers

[fof-plural]

05 - Wingless Angel

Blue isn’t a big talker, so I guess I’ll step in to write down our thoughts (Pink).

This piece is one that’s very special, as it follows exactly the line of thought Blue went down in discovering what it’s identity means to it. I won’t go through the whole backstory, but Blue and I were the first two of us to exist, and we went many years believing we were the same person, to the point that the original name Blue has chosen for itself ended up becoming the body and I’s name instead.

The initial struggle with accepting the fact that we’re plural was mostly on Blue, since she was the one who made the decision to believe she was real and act on that desire to exist as separate from me. It was a rough time, especially since she believed it was selfish to potentially upend our entire life again after our transition was finally making me feel happy in this body. I’m so proud of her for putting itself forward and taking that leap of faith.

We’re also so lucky to have an awesome protector in Purple who always seems to be able to unblock access to memories and alters exactly when we’re ready to deal with them. For all the stress it puts on her, it really has made all the difference in learning and healing, and I hope someday she’ll be able to break down her own walls and trust us to help her.

Maybe I overshare on this blog, but I like ranting, plus these feel like pretty general experiences, right?

The final panel was meant to be much different, we were just limited by our current drawing skill. Originally it was going to depict Blue’s wings wrapping around the rest of us to show how she loves where she is and wants to protect what we have, but honestly? I think I like what this depiction represents even more.

The unwillingness to fit in the box just because of what others associate with the labels you tale on. The freedom to be yourself even if nobody else understands what that means for you. To lie there with your wings outstretched rather than curled in, open to the world around you and blissfully vulnerable for the whole world to see. Not defining yourself in terms of others, because you are you, not who you protect, not who you used to be, not who others tell you to be. You are you, wonderful, beautiful, and deserving of the freedom to express who you are.

Pink, Field of Flowers

A final note from Blue. Labels are what they mean to you. Overlapping prewritten definitions can not define you, that is a task only you can complete.

Blue, Field of Flowers

[fof-plural]

04 - Who's Front is it Anyway?

Okay I know this one looks similar to yesterday's comic but I swear it's completely different actually! They both followed the same general format until the punchline so I may or may not have pulled a sneaky little ctrl+c then ctrl+v because I'm a lazy ass and this is my funny comic blog, you can't stop me!

This is pretty much just as common as the last experience to be honest. I don't know why I ever expected switches would be normal and comprehensible things all the time, if the brain demons are taking over it's probably gonna get a little fucky! (I'm allowed to say this, Red very much likes being thought of as a demon.)

Pink, Field of Flowers

[fof-plural]

03 - Host Issues

I've always wondered if this is an experience others have. It feels just like a switch since it leaves me all disoriented and confused, but I didn't actually switch, and nothing has changed at all about the situation I'm in. It just kinda happens? Maybe it's because we're still trying to get rid of the concept of me being "the default" just because I'm the host, but this doesn't really happen with the others, Could be because I'm in front most of the time, could be that we are switching but can't tell until I've already switched back in, or just assuming it's me when we don't know for sure.

All I know for sure is it feels super weird. Let me know if this isn't just a me thing!

Pink, Field of Flowers

[fof-plural]

02 - The Void

The concept of a headspace / internal world has always been something that intrigued us, hell, the name "Field of Flowers" stems from the headspace we'd been trying to create and interact within for a while. As somebody with partial aphantasia, it's really difficult to see anything internally at all, let alone anything cohesive enough to remain solid in our mind.

Solution: The Void™. Since all we can really "see" in our mind's eye at any given time without focusing intently is just an eternal stretch of black nothingness, that tends to be the frame we view internal communication through. When headmates feel close by, we feel them as a nebulous ball of light resembling their colour, or on a good day in the form vaguely of how they want to look. I don't know how to describe it properly, but I do mean feel specifically and not see. The void is always black, even when familiar faces pass through it.

I don't think I could possibly describe it in a way that sounds as boring as it feels, like, calling it "The Void" at all makes it sound like something even though it's just me trying to describe how much nothing it is.

Back before we'd come to the realization that we're plural, headspace was one of the major barriers to believing this was truly what we're experiencing. I'd been friends with many systems, and they'd always talk about what alters were "doing" in their head, as if it was some vast internal world to get lost in, just as real as the physical one. I envied that, and I felt it was safe to put those fears of being plural to rest because it never felt how they'd describe it.

It feels stupid now, really. When we feel alters "doing" things internally, it's really just a feeling, a sense, not some elaborate mental construction, just as abstract as other feelings and senses.

You don't need to watch them smile to know they're happy, you don't need to see the source of a sound to hear it, you don't need to know how to describe the concept of touch to be able to feel it.

Everyone experiences plurality differently. We may not experience it all, but what we do experience is enough. I wish we'd learned this sooner.

White & Pink, Field of Flowers

[fof-plural]

Does someone in particular answer the asks? My money is on it being pink.

Damn, is it that obvious? I guess the host complex is pretty strong when I sign off on the literal introduction post lol

I don't think we have a plan for anybody in particular to answer them, probably just whoever wants to answer the question most and/or whoever it's directed to. We all have our fair share of opinions so there'll probably be some overlap to makes things interesting!

Pink, Field of Flowers