People say bisexuals ID as Bi when weāreĀ āreallyā straight or āreallyāgay because we want attention. I know I do.
But not the way you think.
Most people think that bisexual women are straight girls who are willing to make out with other chicks to improve their odds of picking up dudes. Let me tell you, that kind of attention is not fun. I once had a dude lick my face when I was kissing a girl at a party. Itās fucking gross, and bi women donāt want this kind of attention any more than lesbians do.
And if a guy doesnāt think heās entitled to threesomes, odds are good heās threatened by my sexuality or worried Iām going to cheat. Might be better off not drawing attention to my bisexuality if I want to date men.
And as far as relationships with other women go, Iāve only had sex with or dated other bisexual women, because the few lesbian women I was interested in rejected me because they ādonāt date bi girlsā since theyāre worried a bi woman will leave them for a man. Might be better off not drawing attention to my bisexuality if I want to date women.
But, I said that I identify as bi for the attention. So what kind of attention do I want?
I want to draw attention to the fact that bisexuality is a real identity, and that you canāt assume that every person you see in a different gender relationship is straight and that every person you see in a same gender relationship is gay.
I casually came out to a co-worker yesterday by mentioning my ex-girlfriend. I have to go out of my way to be read as queer, because since Iām in a different gender relationship right now people assume Iām straight. It takes work. I put myself at risk to do it, and since Iām not looking for a relationship with a woman right now, I donāt even get the benefit of letting wlw know Iām available by outing myself.Ā
I identify as bisexual to draw attention to the fact that there are a hell of a lot more same sex-attracted people than anyone thinks. So that people know better than to tell homophobic jokes or whatever that might hurt the feelings of any of my friends or coworkers that arenāt out. I identify as bisexual because maybe if people know Iām bisexual and they know that Iām not whatever stereotype they imagine bi women to be, theyāll change their opinions about what it means to be bi.
I identify as bisexual because bi-visibility helps everyone in the lgbtqia+ community, whether theyāre bi or not.
May I have your attention, please?
snowghoul
turnnoffyourmind
romaincrisis
