these boys have ruined me

"Because we're friends now?" "Because we're more than that."

[andrewsnothing]

[sparklingravenclaw]

Definitely Simon

[dancingwdinosaurs]

I did the unspeakable and drew into a book.

[asterrins]

i asked rainbow a question about the choice of songs in baz’s playlist and yea catch me crying in a corner i guess

[dancingwdinosaurs]

sure, Simon. sure.

[fuck-off-snow]

hi so like your blog is gr8 ily

thank you!! ^^

[arituzz]

There's this book about wizards and stuff that's a bit like Harry Potter? It's supposed to be really good and there's a gay vampire mage and dragons. I think it's called 'Keep going' or something like that?? You'd probably like it :))))

KEEP GOING OMG 

Is it that one about Yourannus-Spasilton Grim-Bitch and Salmon Sleet??

With Persephone Bunce and Amandha Goodbelove??

Where there’s this evil creature called the Surreptitious Ho-hum but it turns out it’s not evil and the evilest of the story is actually Danny the Wizard, who also happens to be Darth Vader?? (Iconic the moment he confesses “Salmon, I’m your father”) (too bad it got cut out in the final draft)

And there’s also this awesome lesbian, Egg the Mooseherd

And the plot is that the boys have to discover who killed Spaz’s mum, Notya Bitch, so they become frenemies with benefits (Salmon falls for Spaz when he sees him wearing jorts) and go to see Egg’s vamp bro, Extremus Petty but Spaz ends up setting a beach on fire or something and they snog endlessly

It’s also significant to the plot that Spaz got kidnapped by a confederancy of Dunces, and that there’s a guy with a magic trouser zip or something

Memorable the moment when Spaz “””””accidentally””””” pushes Salmon down an up escalator and Salmon keeps going down and the unrelenting metal stairs keep going up so he’s caught in an endless loop of rising and falling… i think hat’s why the book is also called “the rise and fall of salmon sleet”

Yeah…… might have heard of it :)))))

[thecruciblegavemeyou]

what the fuck

[shitty-check-please-aus]

AU suggestion

soulmate au where when you meet your soulmate, one of you dies instantly. the survivor must then make a journey into the underworld to retrieve your soul

[itsacpsideblog]

my favorite soulmate aus are the ones that are horrendously inconvenient

[flap-flap]

imagine a snowbaz au

Baz is searching for his soulmate because it’s the easiest way to get into the underworld and he needs to find his mother, who died. The he meets Simon, dying instantly. Simon ends up heroically traveling to the underworld, which at this point is a lot easier than it should be (the guardians are just too tired to keep soulmates out at this point) only to find Baz and Natasha’s souls having tea together.

“Hey, I’m here to uh, bring your soul back?”

“Fuck off, I don’t want to go back”

“You fucking git, do you know how crazy it was crossing the border? I swear I busted out all the ID I had and they still wouldn’t accept me. You’re coming back to the mortal realm whether you like it or not.”

“No.”

“Why are you like this.”

[gaycowboywizard]

Explaining some of my favourite books badly

Raven Cycle: A bunch of teenagers repeatedly accidentally stumble upon bizarre magic in rural Virginia.

The Hexslinger Series: A Pinkerton agent meets gay cowboy wizards and it’s all downhill from there.

Watership Down: Bunnies are waaaayyyy more complicated than you think.

Jane Eyre: Strong independent woman routinely gets fucked over by rich people, broody men, and life.

Wuthering Heights: Everyone is horrible.

Frankenstein: What part of this was a good idea?!

Dracula: Vampires are sexy.

Captive Prince: Royal gay smut.

Carry On: Canon drarry fanfiction.

Warm Bodies: Zombie Romeo and Juliet with a surprising amount of philosophy.

The Iliad: Gods play god.

Percy Jackson and the Olympians: Children kill gods.

The Odyssey: JUST LET THE MAN GO HOME DAMMIT!

[fuck-off-snow]

Simon: Let me get this straight, more like let me run something bi you.

Penny: Let’s pan this out.

Agatha: Let’s ace-ess the situation.

Baz: I’m gay.

[fuck-off-snow]

Simon: I'm already in a relationship. I have a girlfriend and we've been dating for three years and—

Baz: sorry, thought you might need a husband

Simon: oh.. oH... OH