https://archiveofourown.org/works/29215392?show_comments=true#main wrote this fic thought i’d post here but i don’t really use tumblr much anymore
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@fuckchoni
https://archiveofourown.org/works/29215392?show_comments=true#main wrote this fic thought i’d post here but i don’t really use tumblr much anymore
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
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Can you do 70 with Choni?
Absolutely, @thats-a-wolf-howling-at-the-moon! Also, shoutout to my Anon who asked for kids to be included in one of the drabbles I have left. Hope you both enjoy this one!
70. “What are you afraid of?”
Toni had always found a certain peace in the night. She’d learned fromchildhood not to fear the dark. Maybe the absence of the sun’s light hidsecrets, but they weren’t awful things, they were wonderful. Bonfires.Fireflies. Fireworks. Other things not involving fire or similar phenomena.Even after Cheryl, and before the baby, she’d snuck out of their place aftermidnight and wandered under the stars. Trailing the stretched out sleeves of hersweatshirt through tall damp grass was one of Toni’s favourite sensations.Probably for life.
Tonight, she rolled herself awake, surprised to see she was still under theceiling of the bedroom she and Cheryl had shared for almost a decade. Tonicould’ve sworn she’d been living one of those old nights, loose under thestars, where she’d fall asleep against a tree or by the bank of the Sweetwaterbefore she could make it home and get teased by her friends the next day forhaving blades of grass in her hair, or the imprint of tree bark on her cheek.The flawlessly smooth sheets were the new kind of natural that came with livingin her wife’s ecosystem of luxury. The wife was the one element missing.
Scooping a hair elastic from the bedside table (hers, with the dog-earedRussian novels and the coffee table Ansel Adams book Cheryl had been asking herfor months to move to the living room), Toni sat up and twisted her hair intosomething sloppy yet untroubling at the back of her neck. She tugged her sleepshorts (loose since the baby weight gradually fled) back into place afterhaving flailed in her unconscious hours and padded out into the hall.
The house was dark and not at all a stranger to Toni, who had become astudent of its dimensions. She’s graduated out of stubbed toes and smackedelbows sometime between navigating bleary-eyed at 2 a.m. to reach the bathroomwhile their fetus played hopscotch on her bladder and stumbling to the livingroom before dawn to send herself back to sleep with a movie after Cheryl’dbeaten her to the crib when the baby cried.
Everything was quiet. There was only the swishswish of her bare feet on fine wool carpet and the crick of her jaw when she yawned too wide. Besides that, a little whoosh from the bathroom window as sheshuffled past. Cool air was coming with the autumn.
The baby’s room was the obvious destination―the only place Cheryl wouldrather be than with Toni―and that was exactly where she found her wife, leaningagainst the wall just inside the open door. Toni crept in, following the slimbeam from the nightlight plugged in across the hall behind her, but Cheryldidn’t flinch when she kissed her shoulder. Cuddling closer, Toni nosed intoher wife’s hair, sighed against her neck. Automatically, Cheryl wrapped an armaround her shoulders; when her mind was on other things, her default was totouch Toni in a place that the best part of the last year had taught her wassafe to make contact with without causing Toni to wince, groan, or pee herpants.
“What’s on your mind?” Toni whispered, running her fingers through herwife’s hair.
“Him,” she answered with a tired smiled. There was only really one him in their lives, as far as the pairwas concerned, and he was across the room, sound asleep under a mobile of foxesand bears. “Do you think we moved the crib out of our room too soon?”
Toni shook her head against Cheryl’s shoulder.
“It was time. This step is the reason we bought all those fancy babymonitoring gadgets.”
“Which, let me remind you, it took fourand a half hours to get back from Fangs and Sweet Pea when they stole them toplay extreme hide and seek.”
“And now we have them back. And they’re working,” Toni went on, “so pleasetell me why you’re depriving yourself of sleep.”
Cheryl turned to fully look at her for the first time. Her eyebrow lifted.
“Worried about what I’ll look like without my beauty sleep?”
Toni yawned.
“Cute, but I’m too tired for this.”
Her wife sighed and pulled Toni into her arms, chest to back, so they couldboth watch the snoozing lump that was their teeny son.
“What are you afraid of?” Toni asked when Cheryl stayed quiet. The silencelasted so long, she almost drifted off standing up.
“Everything,” Cheryl breathed into her hair. “Right now, he’s perfect. Andhe thinks we’re perfect. He deservesfor us to be perfect,” she added, even quieter now.
Toni gripped the forearms Cheryl had folded across her chest.
“We’re going to be good for him, honey.”
“I don’t want it to be like my―”
“I know,” Toni assured her, rubbing her arms. “His childhood is going to bemagic. We’re going to leave this room, go back to bed, and that’s what I wantyou to dream about.” She turned in her wife’s arms, kissed her slow on themouth. “Ready?” she whispered.
Eyes closed, Cheryl pressed her cheek to Toni’s.
“Ok.”
i have travelled the world (and there's no other girl like you)
Still, there was something absolutely magnetic about Cheryl Blossom, and Toni couldn’t help but feel her almost irresistible pull.
OR
7 times when Toni found herself falling in love with Cheryl, and 1 time when she said so.
ao3
There’s something fascinating about seeing something you don’t like at first but directly know you will love – in time. … You shy away but know there are gratifying secrets there, and the half-open door is often more exciting than the wide.
-Vincent Price
1. The Drag Race.
Toni has done the flag-waving at many drag races (some might say too many), and it’s almost second nature to her by now. This time, though, when Toni walks over to the starting line from where she’s standing next to Sweet Pea, she isn’t the only one. Toni sizes the other girl up (read: checks her out) and her brain practically short-circuits, because damn. Toni is awestruck because this woman (Toni thinks that it would be an insult to refer to someone as refined as the redhead as a mere girl) is gorgeous. Of course, that probably means that she won’t give Toni the time of her day.
Toni has been known to catch feelings really easily. It’s a topic that’s been covered time and time again with the Serpents (“Toni, you useless bisexual,” Sweet Pea chuckles after she tells them about the latest person she scared off. “You are a mess,” Fangs agrees, snorting). This may be why the three words it takes some people months, even years to say are already on her mind.
Thankfully for Toni (she didn’t think that she’d be able to show her face anywhere in Riverdale ever again if she embarrassed herself that badly, in front of the Ghoulies and the Northsiders, no less), she manages to instead say, “I usually do the honours.” That argument sounds weak even in her head, but it was the best she could come up with at the time.
“Not today, Cha Cha,” the ginger bombshell responds dismissively, barely glancing at Toni as she strides confidently past the Serpent. Said Serpent obeys the Northside goddess’ unspoken command to go away, and as she retreats to the spot where Sweet Pea and Fangs are standing, Toni finally puts two and two together. She groans aloud, mentally smacking herself for not getting it earlier. The fiery-haired beauty with a temper to match fits all of Jughead’s descriptions of Cheryl Blossom, HBIC of Riverdale High (“She’s the worst. Cheryl never has a nice word for anyone. Plus, she doesn’t even try to hide her hatred of the Serpents, even though she knows my dad didn’t really kill her brother,” Jughead complains one day. “He did help cover up the murder, though,” Toni rationalizes. “Even so, FP doesn’t represent all of the Serpents,” Jughead insists. This turns into an argument that has very little to do with the Blossom family, and Toni soon forgets about Cheryl). Toni is at once even more grateful that she hadn’t let her emotions rule her brain and decides that she’d better avoid the Blossom in case of any future slip-ups.
Yes. This was the best and most reasonable options, and it would probably save her from a lot of unnecessary heartache.
Still, there was something absolutely magnetic about Cheryl Blossom, and Toni couldn’t help but feel her almost irresistible pull.
2. When the Serpents Transferred to Riverdale High.
With the shutting down of Southside High, the Southside students are now going to be attending Riverdale High. As soon as they walk in, Serpent jackets and all, they are greeted by two Northsiders Toni only knows from Jughead’s stories, Archie Andrews and Veronica Lodge, as well as a few others (Kevin Keller, who Toni recognizes because he used to date Joaquin, and Josie McCoy, former leader of Josie and the Pussycats, are another two that stand out). Toni is only half-listening until she hears a familiar voice and her head snaps up at the sound.
“Stand down, Eva Peron.” Dressed in red from her dress to her lipstick, the young Blossom strolls down the stairs like she owns the place. A pretty (but likely conceited) jock is by her side, and Toni feels a twinge of… jealousy?
Toni had done so well sticking to the promise she made to herself to not see Cheryl Blossom that she had nearly forgotten their encounter. However, the moment that she laid eyes upon the Blossom again, everything came rushing back to her, and Toni was smitten anew.
Jughead mutters something about school spirit, but Toni isn’t listening to him. Her attention belongs to Cheryl Blossom alone.
“Cheryl… No one invited Fascist Barbie to the party,” Veronica greets her, and Toni half-smiles, gaining a new level of admiration for the former New Yorker.
“Wrong, Veronica,” Cheryl shoots back. “No one invited Southside scum to our school.” At this, Toni’s smile turns into a frown. Jughead definitely wasn’t wrong about the Blossom despising the Serpents.
“Listen up, ragamuffins,” the ginger addresses them next, and Toni turns her head to face her. “I will not allow Riverdale High’s above average GPA to suffer because of classrooms that are overcrowded with underachievers. So please, do us all a favour and find some other school to debase with your hard-scrabble ways.” While Cheryl has been making this speech, Toni has been becoming angrier and angrier, her thoughts all becoming along the lines of either ‘fuck her’ or 'I want to fuck her.’ Because although there is nothing Toni finds more attractive in a woman than backbone and assertiveness, the Southside Serpents are her family. So she spits out, “Why don’t you come over here and say that to my face?” Toni advances towards the Northsider, becoming increasingly aware of the sexual tension in the air.
“Happily, Queen of the Buskers,” Cheryl replies without hesitation, also approaching her, and Toni isn’t sure whether she wants to kiss Cheryl or punch her. Unfortunately (or fortunately, because it could’ve ended very badly), Archie steps between them and tries to make some sort of peace. Toni doesn’t hear anything he says, her ears ringing and her eyes fixed on her new enemy/possible love of her life.
Cheryl Blossom.
3. Their Conversation in The Bathroom.
Things for Toni have been awfully quiet on the Cheryl front since the day she transferred to Riverdale High, and Toni doesn’t know whether she’s relieved or disappointed. She finds herself unconsciously searching the halls for the redheaded cheerleader sometimes and wonders why exactly she’s trying to find the Blossom girl. For all of her wondering, Toni still cannot come up with a reasonable explanation. It seems almost fitting, though- an unreasonable attraction to an unreasonable girl.
The next time she sees Cheryl is a coincidence – they happen to be at the same place at the same time – and it almost feels like the universe is laughing at her. When Toni makes an effort to look for Cheryl, she is nowhere to be found, but the one time she isn’t, there Cheryl is.
Their conversation is an accident too- it wouldn’t have happened if Toni wasn’t listening in on Cheryl’s phone call, and Toni usually doesn’t eavesdrop, but in her defence, it was hard not to hear Cheryl.
Toni exits the stall after Cheryl hangs up (and as soon as Toni sees her, she decides that she had most definitely been disappointed when she hadn’t had a Cheryl sighting, because why else would she be so cheerful now?) and washes her hands casually, trying to act like she hadn’t just absorbed every detail of the Blossom girl’s talk with Jughead.
“Did you just tell Jughead that Archie and Betty kissed?” Toni inquires rhetorically, trying to sound indifferent even though her heart is pounding from Cheryl’s close proximity (What is going on? Toni asks herself. She’s never gotten this worked up over anyone before).
“Yes. So what if I did?” the Blossom answers immediately, sounding just as apathetic as Toni wished she herself did.
“Did you at least have a reason?” Toni asks next, turning towards Cheryl.
“Oh, that’s right. You’re new here,” the taller girl remembers, also pivoting to face Toni. “Hi! I’m Cheryl Blossom, aka Cheryl Bombshell, which means… I need no reasons. I simply… am. Feel free to tremble.”
Toni certainly feels like trembling right now, but not for the reasons Cheryl “Bombshell” might think. So although she wants to melt into a gay-ass puddle at the ginger’s feet, Toni blurts out, “I have a better idea,” as if saying it aloud will make it true. She clings to the strap of her bag like it’s the last thing tethering her to sanity.
“Why don’t you tell me what’s bothering you, because clearly… You’re in a lot of pain,” Toni continues, taking a chance and placing her hand on Cheryl’s arm. Cheryl looks at said hand like it’s a personal insult to everything she stands for.
“Get your sapphic Serpent hands off of my body!” she hisses, slapping Toni’s arm away and storming out of the bathroom.
Far from being scared off, said 'sapphic Serpent’ stands there with a small smirk spreading across her face because she knows something about the Blossom girl that Cheryl might not have even realized about herself.
That was the gayest panic Toni has witnessed in a while, and Toni is making it her mission to get Cheryl Blossom to come out of the closet.
4. Seeing Love, Simon At The Movie Theatre.
Toni waits outside the theatre, lost in thought. The majority of it is about the closet case known as Cheryl Blossom and the conversation they had earlier that day, but occasionally a 'where the hell is Fangs?’ flits across her mind. That question is finally answered when Toni’s phone buzzes, startling her and breaking the peaceful silence. She fumbles it out of her pocket and glances at the screen.
Fangs: I can’t make it to the movie. Something else came up.
This is usually a euphemism for 'Sweet Pea and I are going to have sex,’ but just to be sure, Toni texts him back.
Toni: 'Something else came up.’ Was it Sweets’ penis?
A few seconds later, the phone vibrates again with his response.
Fangs: ;)
That’s a yes, then. She lets out a sigh and finally pushes the door open. Don’t get her wrong, Toni’s happy for the two of them, but sometimes she just feels like a third wheel.
She looks around, trying to find someone else she knows to sit with, and then – jackpot. Cheryl Blossom, here to see Love, Simon? Toni silently thanks the universe for yet another opportunity to learn more about this complex human being (I know I thought that you were laughing at me before, but now I see that you ship us too) and heads over.
“Let me guess…” Toni begins. “A cherry cola for Cheryl Bombshell.”
“My god, what do you want? And why do you keep stalking me?” Cheryl asks, already irritated. Toni feels a pang of sadness at the clear rejection but is still quick to refute her accusation.
“I’m not. I came to see this movie with Fangs, and he bailed on me,” she explains, and Cheryl looks almost… apologetic?
Lowering her voice, Toni adds, “Are you okay?” The Blossom girl opens her mouth and Toni’s heart leaps at the thought of Cheryl finally opening up to her.
“I’m alone at the movies and I’m trying to stay away from my mother, who has turned our house into her sexual playpen,” the Northsider answers, and Toni’s mouth falls open slightly. “So, no, I am really not.” The pink-haired Serpent takes a risk, putting it all out there.
“Oh, I was going to grab a seat alone, unless you want some company,” she offers gently. “But… no pressure.” Cheryl smiles at her, takes one last sip of her drink, and follows Toni into the movie theatre. It takes almost everything Toni has to not grin like an idiot (she’s making progress!). Somehow, she manages, and the pair finds two empty spots just as the movie begins.
Love, Simon is even better than Toni hoped (then again, the fact that Cheryl is sitting next to her the whole time doesn’t hurt). She thinks about texting Fangs something taunting after it ends, but all of her ill thoughts disappear when she glances over at Cheryl Blossom, Ice Queen extraordinaire, and finds her crying.
At this rare sight, Toni feels like the post-saving-the-presents-from-going-off-the-cliff Grinch, her heart growing three sizes. She experiences a rush of affection for this girl, who she hardly knows but is already falling for.
5. Their Conversation at Pop’s Diner.
After the movie ended, this new, subdued version of Cheryl allowed Toni to take her to Pop’s and buy her a milkshake. Now, they sit at the counter, the Blossom girl stirring her strawberry milkshake with her straw.
“Now, you may think you’ve mastered the art of silent tears, but I saw you crying during that movie, Cheryl,” Toni admits.
“I never cry at movies. Real life’s tragic enough,” Cheryl responds simply and without any force. “But when Simon’s mom said he used to be such a carefree kid growing up, and then, at a certain point, he stopped being that happy kid because he was hiding a secret, just…” Her voice breaks.
“Cheryl-” Toni starts, concerned, but Cheryl isn’t finished.
“Everyone thinks I’m this loveless monster, but it isn’t true,” the redhead protests. “I loved someone who loved me.” There’s a bittersweet expression on Cheryl’s face as she remembers. “My mother destroyed it.”
“You mean your brother, Jason?” Toni guesses. “I heard how close you guys were.” But the Northsider shakes her head.
“No, not JJ,” she corrects Toni. “Her name was… Heather.” Toni’s heart soars as her suspicions are confirmed. She has a chance with Cheryl Blossom.
But right now, Cheryl needs comfort, so the Serpent keeps her face neutral.
“She was my best friend in junior high. She used to sleep over every weekend, until one night, my mother caught us in the same bed. She said I was… deviant,” the Blossom girl confesses. Toni is left desperately searching for something, anything she could say to make Cheryl realize that she deserves family and friends that care about her and don’t make her think that her sexuality is something to be ashamed of, relationships that build her up instead of knocking her down, and all the love in the world.
She deserves me, a small voice in Toni’s head whispers. I would give her everything.
“Cheryl, I am so sorry. But you have to know your mother’s wrong,” she insists, so full of sureness and conviction in her words. “You’re not loveless, you’re not deviant, okay?” At this, she grabs Cheryl’s hand, her heart on her sleeve. “You’re… sensational.”
6. The Sleepover.
Toni hasn’t gone to many sleepovers – growing up, her two best friends were Fangs and Sweet Pea, and the only times she slept over at their places were when she got kicked out of her trailer. Because of this (as well as Cheryl’s utter unpredictability), Toni wasn’t sure what to expect when Cheryl invited her and the rest of the 'inner circle Vixens’ to a “mandatory slumber party.”
The sleepover is even stranger than Toni had expected. First, they sit in a line and brush each other’s hair (Is this a strange activity for a slumber party, or is it just me? Toni ponders). Then, after they’re finished, Cheryl gets to her feet.
“Inner circle, Cousin Betty, I didn’t just bring you to Thistlehouse for a girlish slumber party,” she begins, looking distressed. “The truth is, I’m terrified of being alone here. There’s a stranger in this house: my Uncle Claudius. He’s as mad as the sea, and ever since he blew in I feel like I’m in mortal peril.”
Toni is filled with equal desire to protect Cheryl (what the hell? She’s never been this possessive before) and puzzlement. Is this another game (with Cheryl, who can tell)?
To clarify, she replies, “Wait, I’m confused. Is this real, or are we playing a game?”
“All too real, TT,” the Blossom girl answers. Toni’s heart swells a little at the nickname (Not the time, Topaz, she scolds herself).
“I fear they’re plotting against me and Nana Rose. Mumsy cultivates esoteric herbs in the conservatory: tannis root, jimsonweed… I’m afraid to eat for fear of being poisoned,” Cheryl worries.
“Cheryl, are you sure you’re not imagining things?” Josie asks carefully, and Toni frowns before she can stop herself. She herself has only known Cheryl for a very short time, but she still trusts Cheryl’s judgement and she knows that Cheryl would never lie about anything this big. Actually, Cheryl doesn’t really lie about anything. It’s one thing that Toni’s always admired about Cheryl: she’s honest to a fault. If you ask her a direct question, she’ll answer truthfully.
Toni wonders why the rest of Cheryl’s inner circle, who have known her for much longer than she has, don’t seem to know Cheryl at all.
While Toni has been pondering the implications of Cheryl’s other 'friends’ not trusting her enough to know when someone is dangerous, Betty has added something to the conversation. Whatever it is that she said, it seems to have been in agreement with Cheryl, so at least not all of them think that Cheryl’s going crazy.
After that, the conversation seems to have ended. Cheryl moves on to sleeping arrangements, immediately deciding that Josie, Veronica, and Betty will be sleeping on the floor and she and Toni will be sleeping in the bed. Toni’s heart jumps a little at this, wondering what Cheryl’s rationale is.
Whatever the reason (and nobody asks), everyone acquiesces and Toni settles into bed next to the redhead. However, she almost immediately starts to regret her earlier approval of the idea, because how the hell is she going to get any sleep when she’s laying inches away from the aptly nicknamed Cheryl 'Bombshell’? Surprisingly, Cheryl also seems to have difficulty finding rest. After all of the other girls have gone to sleep, Toni hears a rustling sound, which can only mean that Cheryl has turned towards Toni. The Serpent begins to face the Blossom girl as well, but just as quickly, Cheryl looks back up at the ceiling.
“Full disclosure,” Cheryl starts quietly, and the two roll over to fully face each other. “I didn’t want to invite all the girls tonight.” Toni shifts a little as she starts really thinking that the redhead has some ulterior motives.
“But I knew my hideous mother would never allow me to invite just you.” Her voice lowers even further on the last word, and Toni smiles. “Which is… what I craved.” Toni feels like her heart is going to beat out of her chest. This is it, she knows, with a certainty that she’s never had before. This is when we become more than friends. And it seems that Toni’s right, too, because Cheryl is leaning in and Toni is leaning in, and just as their lips are about to meet –
There’s a crashing sound and they pull apart from each other. Cheryl is out of bed and rushing into the hall in a second. Toni is right behind her, followed by Josie, then Veronica, then Betty. They look over the railing and everything else falls away as Cheryl lets out a piercing scream because in a heap at the bottom of the stairs is Nana Rose Blossom.
Toni recalls that this is exactly what Cheryl had been scared would happen, and then a selfish bit of her wants to scream as well, but for a slightly different reason (We were having a moment, for fuck’s sake!).
The girls all wait outside as an ambulance arrives to take Nana Rose to the hospital, and finally, Cheryl speaks once again, tears of fear in her eyes.
“Toni, I think they pushed my nana down the stairs,” she frets. Then, with a tone that suggests that she knows beyond a doubt that what she’s saying is true, Cheryl continues, “I think I’m next.”
7. Saving Cheryl From Conversion Therapy.
Toni had stayed by Cheryl’s side since Nana Rose’s 'accident,’ terrified by the conviction Cheryl had possessed when she told Toni that she thought she might be the next member of her household to suffer an assassination attempt. The only time they spent apart was when they were sleeping because Toni was given to trust that Cheryl wasn’t kidding when she said that Penelope Blossom wouldn’t allow just Toni to sleep over. Still, she insisted that Cheryl text her when she went to bed and when she woke up so that Toni knew nothing bad had happened to her while she was gone.
The Serpent is supposed to be meeting Cheryl at the hospital to check up on Nana Rose. However, when she gets there, the only person in Nana Rose’s room is Nana Rose. Toni feels a wave of panic (No, no, no, they can’t hurt her, I won’t let them, no), but she pushes it down for the moment, desperate for a reasonable explanation. She sits anxiously by Nana Rose’s bedside until the door opens. Toni leaps to her feet, but to her disappointment and distress, it isn’t Cheryl, only a doctor.
“Excuse me, Doctor Masters, but have you seen Cheryl?” Toni inquires, trying not to seem too nervous.
“Oh, she left with her mother a little while ago,” he responds, and Toni nods, trying to calm down. Her phone probably just died, she reasons with herself.
Her sense of unease stays with her, though.
Toni drives her motorcycle to Thornhill, accidentally running a few red lights in her all-consuming need to find Cheryl and know that she’s safe. She knocks on the front door and Penelope Blossom answers it.
Cheryl’s mom definitely recognizes Toni, all right, and she looks like she’s contemplating closing the door right then and there. Before she can do that, though, Toni pipes up.
“Mrs. Blossom, hi! I’m looking for Cheryl, she wasn’t at the hospital with her nana…” she says, crossing her arms over her chest in an attempt at seeming laid-back.
“No, she’s gone,” Penelope answers promptly, no emotion on her face. Toni’s heart stops. Oh my god, Cheryl was right. “Boarding school in Switzerland. All-girls. She left us last night.” This should pacify Toni, but it just sounds so… fake.
“Mrs. Blossom, that doesn’t make any sense,” she argues, but Penelope is done talking.
“Don’t come here again,” she finishes. Now, she slams the door in Toni’s face. Toni wants to protest, but she has little choice in this matter, so instead, she turns away and gets on her motorcycle. She takes one last concerned glance at the house and drives away.
As much as it kills her, Toni can’t find any free time to confide in anyone about her strange encounter with Mrs. Blossom until after cheer practice (Sweet Pea and Fangs are too busy with their vendetta against Jughead and Betty’s campaign). Nobody other than her even seems to really notice that Cheryl is gone.
She confronts Veronica and Josie after everyone else leaves.
“Do you remember how paranoid Cheryl was at her slumber party, saying that her mom and uncle were out to get her?” Toni queries. Josie and Veronica nod and make affirmative noises. “Well, I think they did something to her.”
“What kind of something?” Josie asks, looking sceptical.
“Her mom said they sent her off to some all-girls boarding school in Switzerland,” Toni continues.
“Well, that’s easy enough to check, there’s only one: Surval Montreux,” Veronica offers. Of course she’d know that, Toni thinks.
“Please. If Cheryl was in the Swiss Alps, she’d be posting parka selfies every hour,” the Serpent scoffs. “But her social media’s been dead for days.”
“Wait, that’s a sure sign of foul play,” Veronica realizes.
“Yeah,” Toni agrees.
“Whatever you need, Toni, I’m in,” Veronica decides.
“Me too,” Josie concurs. “Even if we have to storm Thistlehouse.”
They all head over to Cheryl’s home. Toni feels more confident with the two of them by her side, sure that Penelope Blossom won’t be able to turn all three of them away. Even if she can’t get any answers out of Cheryl’s mother, Toni is prepared to interrogate as many people as she can to find out where Cheryl is.
With that thought, Toni’s phone buzzes.
Sweet Pea: What are you doing now? Fangs and I were thinking that we could all go see Love, Simon today since he had to bail on you last night.
Toni is trapped. She knows that if she tells the truth, she’ll be subject to ridicule, such as but not limited to, You are so whipped, Topaz, and I can’t believe that you got involved with a Northsider! But Toni is an awful liar, and her falsehoods fool nobody, even over text.
She decides to compromise.
Toni: I can’t. I’m hanging out with some of the Vixens.
The statement is half-true, at least, and Sweet Pea seems to buy it.
Sweet Pea: You better not keep ditching us for them! Serpents are family.
Toni: Trust me, I won’t. This is a one-time thing.
I hope, her brain adds. If she finds Cheryl soon, there will be no need for these kinds of searches anymore. And I will find her.
She sets her phone down just as Josie finishes her threat.
“-maybe you’ll tell him.” She sits back, confident that the menace of law enforcement showing up at the Blossom’s door will be enough to make Penelope Blossom crack.
“All right, then,” Cheryl’s mother settles. “The truth is that Cheryl started exhibiting strange, deviant behavior.” Toni’s heart squeezes as she remembers the pain on Cheryl’s face as she had admitted that her mother had told her that she was deviant as well. At the moment, Toni thinks that she’s never hated anyone as much as she hates Penelope Blossom right now.
“So I sent her abroad to a private wellness institute where they’re trying to help her,” Mrs. Blossom continues. “You don’t have to believe me, but here, let me show you something.” She passes a piece of paper to Josie, who unfolds it to reveal a drawing of her and Cheryl.
“Oh my god,” Josie murmurs. What is it? Toni wonders, not seeing anything out of place in the drawing.
“She’s drawn dozens like it,” Cheryl’s mother tells them, like this is proof of Cheryl’s deviance.
“I don’t understand.” Veronica voices her confusion.
“No, but Josie does. Don’t you?” Penelope Blossom asks. “Cheryl was obsessed with you to the point where I was afraid she might hurt you, or herself, or both.” Josie looks horrified, but when Toni looks at the paper, all she feels is understanding. This is your fault! she wants to scream at Mrs. Blossom. If you hadn’t forced her to stay in the closet and told her that she was a monster, then maybe she wouldn’t have believed that she truly was freakish.
“So, if you would like me to tell that to your mother and her boyfriend and show them and the town Cheryl’s drawings of you, I’d be happy to,” Cheryl’s mother says in a voice that suggests that she really would be happy throwing her only remaining child under the bus. “But hopefully, you girls have the decency to keep this matter private.”
Penelope stands up and opens the door of Thistlehouse, staring pointedly at the three of them. Josie is the first to get up, fleeing out of the door. Veronica and Toni follow quickly.
“Josie, wait! Slow down! We need to regroup!” Veronica calls after her.
“If what Mrs. Blossom said is even a tiny bit true, that means that Cheryl threatened me, sent me a bloody pig’s heart!” Josie exclaims, whirling around to face them. “I’m out, you guys! I’m done.” The young McCoy storms away again, and this time, Toni and Veronica don’t go after her.
This is what separates us, Toni realizes as she watches Josie leave. I see Cheryl’s gay panic for what it is, while she sees it as… what? The actions of a perverse madwoman? Toni glances over at Veronica, who shows no signs of leaving, and wonders if the Lodge heiress isn’t at least a little bit not-straight herself, recalling a story Jughead told her about when Veronica and Betty had made out for Vixen auditions. At the time, it had sounded like nothing more than the fodder of straight-boy fantasies, but now, Toni ponders the possibility that the kiss had meant more than that.
Whatever the case, the two of them head their separate ways, and Toni is left to worry about Cheryl even further.
The next day, in history class, Toni is lost in thought, conjuring different places where Cheryl might have gone, each less likely than the last. Toni is thinking about how Cheryl might have already murdered when the speaker screeches.
“Antoinette Topaz to the principal’s office. Antoinette Topaz, please report to the principal’s office.” Toni is equally pissed off that they used her full name and anxious about what this could mean. She grabs her stuff and rushes to the office, a small part of her desperately hoping that this is about Cheryl.
“A call for you. She said it was urgent,” the secretary informs her. Toni grabs the phone and puts it to her ear.
“Hello?” she greets the unknown caller hesitantly.
“She’s not far away,” a scratchy voice tells her.
“Who is this?” Toni asks, confused.
“Cheryl. She’s nearby,” the caller repeats, and this time, Toni recognizes her.
“Nana Rose?” Toni clutches the phone tighter, urgency in her tone. “Nana Rose, where is she?”
“With… the sisters,” the Blossom matriarch rasps. Before she can say more, the line goes dead.
“Hello? Nana Rose?” Toni shakes the phone desperately, dread pooling in her stomach.
At Vixens practice later that day, Toni and Veronica sit high up in the bleachers.
“That was Nana Rose Blossom who paged you?” Veronica reiterates as soon as Toni starts telling her the details of the call.
“Yeah, it was. Although we got disconnected before she could say too much beyond the fact that Cheryl was nearby and that she was with 'the sisters,’” Toni continues disappointedly.
“The Sisters? What sisters?” Veronica wonders.
“I don’t know,” Toni admits despondently. “Maybe there’s a re-education camp called The Sisters?”
“Well, there’s the Sisters of Quiet Mercy, but that’s more like an orphanage,” Veronica contributes. “I don’t think they do gay conversion there.” What other kind of conversion therapy is there? a small voice in the back of Toni’s head snidely remarks.
“Well, who would know for sure?” Toni asks instead.
“Oh my god, of course,” Veronica says, like she knows a guy who’s an expert on conversion therapy and she’ll just call him up.
It turns out, she does, in a way.
“Yes, it absolutely could be the Sisters of Quiet Mercy,” Kevin tells them when they ask. “It’s one of the few places in the country that still does conversion therapy. Off the books, of course.” And Kevin, the sheriff’s son, didn’t think to tell his dad about this? Toni thinks.
“What the hell decade is this?” she exclaims to nobody in particular. Now that she has her answer, all Toni wants is to storm the Sisters of Quiet Mercy and get Cheryl back, but the universe (and Kevin) have other plans. The sheriff’s son rambles on about a distillery, hookups, and a tunnel, and could probably go on for a while, but Veronica thankfully interrupts him.
“Kevin, can you lead us to this secret gay hookup tunnel?” the Lodge heiress requests, and if Toni wasn’t so worried about Cheryl, she might’ve laughed, because the absurdity of the sentence was certainly not lost on her.
“I can probably find it,” he replies. “But we should go at night.”
So it’s with this logic that Toni finds herself waiting in the lobby of the Pembrooke later that day. Eventually, Veronica comes down the hallway in a skintight black bodysuit that doesn’t seem all that practical for a break-in (Cheryl would likely approve of the outfit, though). The more I hang out with Veronica, the more I like her, Toni notices.
“Sorry, I had to wait for my parents to do bed check,” Veronica explains smoothly. Toni nods and the two go out the front door, where Kevin’s car is idling. Veronica gets into the passenger seat, so Toni slides into the back. Veronica and Kevin keep up a constant stream of chatter on the way, but as soon as the car parks, everyone goes silent. They run up to the tunnel and Kevin begins to speak.
“According to my intel, the tunnel that leads from the main residence comes out here,” he informs them.
“Okay, that’s our way in,” Veronica decides. “Alright, Kevin, you stay here. If we’re not back in fifteen minutes, call your dad.” Kevin nods, and Toni pulls a crowbar out of her bag. She pries the door open and ducks into the tunnel. Veronica follows close behind, their flashlights reflecting off of the water on the ground.
“And when we get to the main building, what happens then?” Veronica inquires.
“We search each and every damn room until we find her,” Toni answers her, dead serious. Anger flares in her at the thought of finally being in this place that has no doubt tortured Cheryl and many, many others. This place will be lucky if Toni doesn’t burn it down by the time the night is over.
Veronica nods in agreement solemnly and they hurry along. Once they get into the building, the two turn to each other again.
“Okay, let’s split up,” Toni decides authoritatively. “We’ll cover twice the ground.”
“Okay, but be careful,” Veronica warns her.
“Yeah,” Toni agrees half-heartedly, already rushing off. Cheryl first, my safety second.
“Cheryl?” she shouts as she goes along, looking through every room with an intensity that scares herself. Finally, she barges into a room that seems to be occupied. A movie is playing, and she squints into the light of the projector.
“Cheryl? Are you in here?” Toni asks.
“Toni?” a familiar voice replies, and a wave of relief washes over Toni.
“We came to rescue you,” she says simply.
“You did?” Cheryl repeats, and Toni’s heart breaks again for her. I will always come to rescue you, she thinks fiercely. I will always be there for you.
I will always want to make you feel loved. Toni knows now that she is completely and irrevocably screwed, but she doesn’t give a flying fuck, because Cheryl Blossom is worth being broken up and lovesick over.
And in a second, it seems like all there is in the world is the two of them. Cheryl hugs her, the kind of hug that feels right.
In the middle of the Sister of Quiet Mercy, in a room full of teens just like them, in front of a homophobic film, Cheryl and Toni kiss, and the world seems to stop. Nothing else matters… until Veronica bursts into the room.
“Cheryl, Toni,” she says, not seeming fazed in the least bit by their fuck-the-homophobes liplock. “There are a bunch of nuns coming. We have to go. Come on.” They hurry after Veronica, but as they run, Cheryl grabs Toni’s hand and weaves their fingers together. Toni wants to be able to save everyone in that room, but for now, the only person she’s focused on getting out of there is Cheryl.
Toni should have been more afraid of the angry nuns chasing after them, and she probably would have been more afraid were she not so overwhelmingly happy. She had kissed Cheryl Blossom, HBIC and Riverdale High’s biggest and most vocal hater of the Southside Serpents. Cheryl Blossom has kissed her. And now, they were holding hands.
Toni feels awfully tempted to tell Cheryl how much she means to her, but this is the worst possible time to do so, so she stays quiet. They run and they run, and everything is a blur. She knows that they escape the nuns, that they meet up with Kevin, and they drive off, but the only thing tethering Toni to reality is the solidness of Cheryl’s hand in her own.
+1. After Their First Time Together.
Toni lies on Cheryl’s bed in her room at Thistlehouse, her arm wrapped around her girlfriend’s waist. Cheryl is sweaty but sated, and Toni’s mouth curls into a smirk at the thought that she’s the cause of this. She presses a light kiss to the back of Cheryl’s neck, listening to the redhead’s even, rhythmic breathing. Toni gazes at her girlfriend adoringly, still in disbelief that Cheryl wanted her first time to be with her. Out of the likely hundreds of people willing (and wishing) to have sex with her, she chose Toni.
And god, does Toni love her for it. In fact, her love for Cheryl is so overwhelming and abundant that it’s filled her to the brim and is now spilling over, unable to be contained.
Because of this, and because of innumerable other reasons, Toni finally says, “I love you.” It sounds terribly loud in the silent room, and for a second, Toni thinks that Cheryl just slept through her confession, but then the ginger turns to face her, tears (of happiness, for once) in her eyes.
“I love you, too,” Cheryl whispers back, and to Toni’s surprise, she finds that she’s crying too.
“Yeah?” she sniffles.
“Yeah,” Cheryl responds, and when Toni looks into her girlfriend’s eyes, she sees the same love she carries around her reflected back at her.
“We can never tell Sweet Pea and Fangs about this,” Toni says next. Cheryl snorts, wiping the tears off of her cheeks.
“That’s a given.”
The two lean in to kiss each other again. It isn’t the first time, and they both know that it won’t be the last.
Fin.
Writing Prompts
1. “I never met a person who is so prone to accidentally hurting themselves.”
2. “Living with you is like living with a tornado, a cute tornado, but still a tornado.”
3. “Murder is kinda against the law you know.”
4. “If you give me a potato, I will forever be at your service.”
5. “I’d actually prefer to turn you into a toad, unfortunately for the both of us I have different plans.”
6. “Isn’t it going to be fun? I think this is going to be amazing!”
7. “Have I ever told you how much I love you? Because I love you so much, also, don’t look in the kitchen, I love you so much.”
8. “I cannot find one pair of matching socks!”
9. “Well, at least it’s not raining.”
10. “The flowers look great this time of year, but you know what’s better? Leaving the corpses of your enemies littered among the garden. Hello, my name is —— and I have come here today to tell you all about the wonders of murder.”
11. “I’ve never met a more idiotic wizard in my life. How are you alive?”
12. “This hat doesn’t talk, but my cape screams, what does that mean?”
13. “I just got hit on by a skeleton, this is the best day of my life, nothing can top today, I have peaked.”
14. “Having thought this entirely through, I have yet to come up with a solution, however, I did buy this mood ring.”
15. “Leaving right now would leave the wrong message, instead, let’s leave right now, but with capes on to let them know we mean business, also, that we are stylish and not to be messed with.”
Feel free to ask for Choni!
hope your pets stay healthy in 2017
I almost didn’t blog this and felt guilty
Not risking it
hope ya pets even healthier in 2018
I know a lot of you guys don’t want to reblog those posts about the wildfires in Greece because they’re too long, so I figured I would make a shorter post for y’all.
Here is a link on how to help and what the current situations are, and here is a direct link to the fundraiser.
As someone who has personally been affected by fire, I would really appreciate if y’all could sb this??
nothing I post is showing up in the tags wtf
all the things I can never feel the same way
This is my first fanfiction for this ship I love them a lot. This is kinda weird but I kinda like it.. idk? let me know what you think everything is appreciated. It will be on ao3 soon I lost my account and had to apply for a new one anyways. sorry if theres any grammar mistakes its about 3000 words and I’m kinda new to writing
[Summary]
Looking back on events in Toni’s life when she felt the presence of her mother and the moments she realises she can never experience life peacefully
or;
In which Toni spirals over the years and Cheryl just can’t pick up the pieces
//
Toni is nine years old when she receives her first serious injury.
Two broken fingers and a hairline fracture upon her wrist. She doesn’t cry.
Instead, she remains staring, empty, at the new arrivals adorning her body. There’s a thick, white cast cradling her appendages and Toni hate’s it. It’s much too tight, juxtaposing her very loose clothing donated to her by neighbours of Sunnyside.
“Awesome! Is it really broken?” A young Fangs says in awe as he and Sweetpea approach her. He continues his gaze as Sweetpea rests his bicycle against a tree by her uncles trailer.
“Yup. I can’t even get the cast wet or anything” Toni replies, trying to reciprocate the energy her best friends were radiating.
“I still can’t believe you punched that guy, it was so cool!” Sweetpea perks up, his mouth forming into a bright smiling, albeit full of gaps.
Toni looks up at him hastily. They’re proud of her. She’s confused as all she can feel is an overwhelming guilt.
Guilt for lashing out, guilt for hurting someone, guilt for burdening her uncle with a hospital bill due to lack of insurance. She looks upon her injury and feels nothing -except- a hatred for herself. She tunes out as the boys start rambling on about all the activities they plan to do tomorrow after school.
All Toni can think about is how this would have been if her parents had been here. She clenches and unclenches the remaining fingers not encased in a weakened cement, they shake and the process is strenuous.
The more she does it, the more she swears she can feel the last time her mother ever held her hand. The last time she felt her father’s grip as she held onto him whilst sitting upon his shoulders.
In this moment, Toni wants nothing more than to have her mom kiss her forehead and tell her that everything will be ok. But that can’t happen anymore. And it never will.
She’s brought out of her thoughts by Sweetpea.
“-and then my mom said we could all sleep over at mine, how about it, Toni?”
“Uh, I have to ask my uncle” She mumbles, picking herself off the ground and trudging lazily into her trailer.
“Oh, okay. Still gonna ride to school tomorrow with us?” Fangs retorts, noticing Toni’s glum exterior.
“Can’t.” She replies and holds up her cast wearily. Before either of the boys can reply she slams the trailer door shut and makes her way to the couch.
“What did I say about slamming that damn door!” She hears her uncle bellow from the next room. Toni hangs her head down, as if to shut the rest of the world out. Finally she begins to let the tears fall that she had locked inside her for months. She wept for her parents, wept for the life that would no longer be hers. This was her reality now. This was how it was.
//
She’s fourteen when she becomes a serpent.
She’s surrounded by so many faces, so many eyes, so many smiles. She’s overwhelmed as she looks upon a group of dirty old men smirking hungrily at her. She still feels guilty. Toni looks upon her hands, glances upon the new scars that cover the old. They don’t look like -feel- like her hands anymore. They haven’t for a while.
She gets down from the tattered stage and is greeted by an intense force that takes her by surprise.
“You’re one of us now, Tiny. How does it feel?” Sweetpea questions, releasing her from his grasp.
It’s then that Toni finally takes everything in. This dirty bar that’s been essentially her home for the last years, her many friends, now her family that she’s grown up with. Every stain that laced the windows, every torn up, battered floorboard, every memory that she could conjure up in the moment. Toni inhales. She looks up at Sweetpea, still smiling lazily at her. Then at her hands once more and back to Sweetpea.
“Good. I feel.. good.” She starts to smile, maybe to make him happy, maybe for herself. She can’t really tell. She hasn’t been able to for a while.
“Atta girl!” He practically yells and she feels herself become trapped in the atmosphere. Taken over by the many faces within the bar as the night presses forward. Drinks are passed and sloppy conversations are made. Toni feels loved, she knows she’s loved, yet doesn’t know why she feels so sequestered.
//
Deja vu.
That’s what she feels as she enters her girlfriends house. She’s lost in her own mind again. It happens a lot more frequently now. She sits down and feels calmed by the constant ticking of the grandfather clock. Nana Rose is positioned in front of the TV and Toni is comforted by the little red light emitted from it.
She feels someone take her hand. It stiffens, something that doesn’t happen often. She can’t understand why she’s feeling like this. She wants to believe she has everything she could have ever desired, yet she doesn’t feel them the way she once used to. Toni wants the world for herself but only if she can have it the way she once felt it.
“TT, you were gone a while, are you ok?” Cheryl inquires, her thumb circling over Toni’s bruised knuckles. She sighs at how detached her girlfriend has been recently. Cheryl tucks a strand of Toni’s pink hair behind her ear. The gesture is so gentle, so full of love, Toni feels herself become grounded. She has to physically fight the tears threatening to spill. She loves this girl so much. She want’s to give her everything, she just can’t understand the things people have done to her. Toni believes she see’s things differently to others. Maybe that’s why she feels so isolated.
“I love you” Toni says, very lackluster but her eyes screaming novels.
Cheryl’s taken aback slightly. This isn’t her Toni. She complies nonetheless. “I love you too, Toni”. She takes her fingers gently under Toni’s chin and cranes her forward as she places her lips upon hers. She feels Toni start to increase her pace, her hands coming to cup Cheryl’s face. Eventually though, Cheryl finds herself breaking the kiss. She looks into Toni’s eyes, reeling in the shared moment. Everything feels frozen and the girl in front of her is almost unrecognisable. The fuzziness of the TV is prominent and the white noise in the room is deafening. Cheryl wants to cry for her girl, nothing and everything is the same. There’s an uncomfortable nostalgia in the room and Cheryl feels overwhelmed by the melancholy. She’s confused yet everything still makes sense.
“I’m sorry” Toni breaks the silence. She looks down at the floor, refusing to meet Cheryls gaze. Once again she finds herself feeling guilty, feeling like she’s let the ones she loves the most down. Cheryl, Sweetpea, fangs. Her parents.
“What for, baby?” Cheryl asks, kissing her forehead and taking hold of her hand.
Deja vu.
Toni feels everything right now. She clenches her eyes tight as she feels the sensations take over her hand.
“I can’t tell you right now.. I don’t have the words” She whispers.
The two girls stare into each other’s eyes, a soft serenity tainting the atmosphere, everything is lukewarm.
//
Cheryl’s in class.
Everyone’s talking and laughing and being teenagers. She watches as Veronica and Archie give each other wistful glances accompanied by half smiles, as if they’re thinking about the same thing and talking through looks. Betty and Jughead are sat next to Cheryl. They’re casually chatting among each other, almost everyone in the room is. Cheryl can’t wait for the lesson to be over.
After an eternity, the bell rings. Cheryl finds Veronica making her way over to her.
“Hey Cher, I haven’t seen much of you recently, how’ve you been?” She asks, making light conversation.
“You see me at cheer practice almost everyday, Veronica. Or is your memory already failing you” She keeps the undertones of her attitude. Business as usual.
“You know what I mean” Veronica gives her a smirk. “Come have lunch with us, I promise we won’t bore you to death”
“That’s a heavy promise, especially considering these lunch plans involve cousin Betty, I assume?”
“Hey!” She hears Betty drawl
Veronica smiles and takes her arm, linking it with her own. They gang make their way over to the cafeteria and find themselves a table. The scene is what to be expected. All the different cliques gathered in their own areas. Cheryl smiles at the fact she has more than one she can fit into. These guys, and the serpents. She relishes in her family, Northside and South. She finds herself glancing at the serpents table. They all seem to be absorbed in a hearty laughter. It makes her heart swell. Sweetpea and Fangs seem to be in a heated discussion, worry plastering both their faces. Toni being know where to be seen.
Her attention is sparked by Betty asking her something.
“How is Toni, Cheryl. She’s been a bit MIA” The whole table unanimously agrees.
“What?” Cheryl replies, a bit lost in the conversation she hasn’t been listening to these last five minutes.
“I’m just saying we haven’t really seen much of Toni, has she even been to school recently” Betty responds.
“Even at the trailer park she’s kinda distant, meetings too” Jughead adds.
“TT is TT. She’s fine, she’s just doing her own thing. She has a lot on her plate right now.” Cheryl says, fully knowing what she has just said was a lie. Toni wasn’t fine, not by a long stretch. But she wasn’t about to tell the scooby gang all this, not even when she didn’t really know herself.
The gang look at her for a second, sort of taking it in but not really satisfied with the answer they were provided. Jughead looks back down at his food and resumes chomping. All of a sudden the sound of screaming deters the whole cafeteria from their previous doings.
“Fuck you, dumbass!” A voice screeches. There’s a blunt noise accompanying it followed by the sounds of punches ricocheting off the lockers. The gang rush to see what’s happening. Cheryl’s eyes widen upon the scene. Before her stands her tiny girlfriend beating the shit out of some guy. He’s stood with his back to a locker, a seeping crimson pouring from his nose and other bruises beginning to litter his face. Cheryl stands frozen at the scene, Archie eventually running in to break it up.
“Get off me, you asshole!” Toni screams, almost completely unaware of the gathering of students around her. She locks eyes with Cheryl, and it’s then that she feels herself come back to reality. Toni runs -sprints- to the front doors of the school. Unsure of what to do Cheryl stands there confused once more.
“Fucking crazy ass bitch. Dumb serpent slut, I didn’t even do nothing, bitch just went crazy” She hears the boy say.
Cheryl looks around the room, some of the students laughing, others stood with their phones out, trying to capture any remaining aftermath.
“Cheryl” Veronica quietly breaks her from her thoughts. “Go” She follows up with. Cheryl, understanding what she has to do feels her feet move, before she knows it she’s outside, searching for her pinkhaired, five foot three girlfriend. Cheryl sees her sat on a bench by the football field. She silently makes her way over to her, unsure of what to say she just places herself next to Toni, offering a shared, understood support. They sit like that for a while. It isn’t until Cheryl looks upon Toni’s hands that she breaks the silence.
“You’re bleeding, TT” Toni looks at her hands, one shaking significantly more than the other. She reaches out for Cheryl who quickly obliges. They both stand up and start to walk, aimlessly.
“Why, Toni? What is going on with you?” Cheryl asks bleakly, she wants nothing more than to help the girl she loves oh so much.
Toni clears her throat, her voice still comes out hoarse and broken. “I- I don’t know. It’s just easy”
“What’s easy?” Cheryl responds
“That.. this” Toni holds up her bloody, broken hand, as if it were to explain everything to Cheryl.
Cheryl sighs once more, Toni taking her over to a tree. She begins to kiss her, peppering them generously around her neck and back to her lips. It’s hollow, deposed. It’s missing something and Cheryl can feel it. No longer once full of the passion it once harboured, yet Toni showed no signs of stopping. Cheryl finds herself having to break yet another kiss.
“-Toni, Toni s-stop, I-.” Cheryl tries to gently position her girlfriend off of her.
“You what, Cheryl? Don’t you want me? Don’t you love me!?” It comes out demanding and angry. Cheryl has never seen this side of her girlfriend before
“What!? I- of course I do Toni, it’s just.. let- let me take you to the hospital” Cheryl offers before she feels Toni slide away from her and begin to walk off, regardless of direction.
“My hand is fine!” She hears Toni yell as she walks further and further away.
“It’s your mind I’m worried about” Cheryl mumbles to herself as she watches Toni fade away into the distance.
//
She doesn’t know how she’s managed to find herself here, but she has.
Some crappy Southside club that she’s been able to sneak into. The walls are etched in mold and are wearing away with age. There’s little light. It’s encompassed by an overall gloomy atmosphere and Toni hates it. She hates everyone here. Currently she’s in the process of flirting with a middle-aged man who was incessant on calling her “sweetheart” to see if she could get him to buy her a drink. After various successful attempts she was growing tired and was in search of more, needed more.
“What are you looking for, Sweetheart” A Ghoulie approaches her, she recognises him (barely) and she informs him on her situation.
“Yeah? Well I got just what you need” He presents a handful of little sticks that Toni knows oh too well.
“Jingle-Jangle?” She looks hesitant.
“I promise ya” He gives her an eager smile.
Toni doesn’t need much more convincing. She doesn’t care at this point and will try anything. She hands him the money and makes her way over to a corner. She anxiously looks around at everyone at the club. They’re sloppily dancing and there’s horrific music blaring throughout the place. Toni pops it into her mouth and downs her drink she was milling with for the last ten minutes.
She starts to feel the effects quickly.
As the night goes on she continuously takes JJ whilst simultaneously drinking. Not good, she knows, but she feels alive. Like everything that she usually experiences starts to have layers. And each layer she understands as well as the last, all adding up to the overall thing. Everything’s much more intense but because of this new understanding that the drugs have given her, Toni feels like a genius. She understands everything so very well. All the words that have lingered in her head, she finally has them. If she could give someone this feeling, they would understand everything. Everything she has felt over these last years. Everything.
If Cheryl were here right now, Toni would be able to explain her head, her mind. Toni can’t stop smiling. She’s dancing and she’s feeling and she’s living her life. The way she assumes it was intended to be felt. Toni looks down at her hands, both as scarred as each other and she clenches them. As she releases, she feels the absence of her mothers grip. Toni panics. She feels herself come undone, starting to hyperventilate and look wildly at this horribly crowded bar filled with sleazy drug addicts and people she promised herself she’d never associate with. She clambers around, holding one hand to her chest, the other she’s clenching and unclenching furiously, trying to feel her mother on her, trying to feel anything as she feels herself slipping.
She finds herself on the bathroom floor. She doesn’t care that she’s most likely kneeling in piss and needles, anything is better than that nightmare. Suddenly, it all becomes too much, too overwhelming as Toni feels the toll of the alcohol and drugs. She’s still tripping but it’s mixing with her come down and she’s in an awkward in between stage that’s messing too much with her body and mind. She’s leaning over the toilet and violently vomiting into it, tears begin staining her cheeks and her hands tremble as she clutches the toilet. She’s completely debilitated and she’d give anything to not be alive.
She hears the door open but can’t bring herself to look up.
“Who do you need me to call?” A gruff woman’s voice sounds and bounces off the tiles in the stalls. Toni barely turns herself but recognises that it’s the bartender who had given her sorrowful looks for most of the night. Toni can’t speak.
She’s not sure how but she’s now sitting on an uncomfortable seat that’s just beside the entrance of the club. She can’t move and she realises this is her come down.
The door opens and Toni hears a familiar “Jesus Christ, Toni”. Her head tilts ever so slightly in the direction and she see’s her girlfriend, face flushed and slightly out of breath, her red hair tousled and her eyes sad. All Toni can do is swallow and try to move her hands.
Cheryl looks down at the girl sat on the bench. She looks at her gaunt features and the black, hollow bags under her eyes. Was Toni always this skinny? Cheryl thought to herself. She analyses the rest of her face and all Cheryl can think is tired. Toni looks so tired.
//
They’re asleep in Cheryl’s too large canopy bed.
There’s three more weeks left until the end of the semester and Toni isn’t sure how she feels. She can’t sleep. She looks at Cheryl and thinks to herself that she has never seen anyone this beautiful. She loves her. And she would do anything for.
“-mm TT, go to sleep” She hears Cheryl mumble.
“I can’t” Toni’s voice barely sounds out.
“Where’s your head, baby” Cheryl starts to sit up and Toni feels guilty that she’s pulled her from sleep.
“Everyone’s left for a place I’m not fond of. I think I’m the only person who realises it”
Cheryl pulls Toni closer, both of them feeling each others breath. She kisses her forehead and says “Everything is going to be ok”
Toni feels herself break.
“Mommy” She sobs.
choni fic recs: one shot edition
i’ve been waiting for someone else to do this and nobody has yet– here is a list of the best choni fics i’ve read. i’m only including one-shots in this because the list was getting super long, but a part 2 with multichapters will be up soon.
one-shots:
took the breath from my open mouth by blossomserpent
the classic “we’re partners for a school project” fic. super light on the angst, super heavy on the gay.
Sea and Sun by Maeve_of_Winter
cheryl plays ariel at disney. toni is dared to swim out to meet her. cute as hell, not heavy on angst at all. plus there’s a nice side of The Gang.
bumblebees fly anyway by Lint
listen, everything that Lint writes is out of this world good. this is no exception. cheryl and toni are partners for a project and then accidentally meet at a gay bar.
Blooming by Name_Surname
a cute little fic about choni starting their family. Name_Surname has a few other fics in this universe and they’re all amazing.
Crimson & Clover by Lint
again, ya’ll know how i feel about Lint. cheryl is crying under the bleachers and toni finds her. this fic made me feel things.
Hidden by yellowroses257
kevin accidentally eavesdrops on cheryl and toni having a sad conversation. this gives me the hurt/comfort that i need.
stone on the shore by jdc15
i’ve probably read this about five times. one of the best versions of toni helping cheryl with the abuse she endures at the hands of her mom that i’ve read.
through the eyes of another by IndianSummer13
i’m a sucker for a “how the friends realize a couple is in love” fic and this one is no exception.
Right by Pure_oblivion
a fill-in-the-blanks fic for the sisters of quiet mercy episode. lots of angst, lots of hurt/comfort. i love everything this author does.
don’t you worry (i can handle it) by dancinghopper
protective!toni jumps out in this fic about what happens after toni finds out about the blackmailing business.
i want to know what love is by owilde
cheryl, who is reeling from the loss of her brother and the abuse she suffers at home, is made to share her shifts at the coffee shop with toni right before she plans to move out. i cannot say enough good things about this fic, i’ve probably read it 10 times over.
Ronnie Knows by ChoniToppaz
choni through veronica’s eyes, because i miss cheronica and it doesn’t make sense that their friendship just halted in season 2.
Solace by another_maggies
toni is in pain in this one, and cheryl gets on her motorcycle to make her feel better.
Five times Cheryl was as blind as a bat by Firebird_18
cute oblivious!cheryl story– lots of fluff.
Riverside Confessions by Beatbot (HeartInABoxx)
cheryl discloses her past to toni. there’s lots of hurt/comfort. it’s a sweet story that addresses everything cheryl has been through.
these violent delights (have violent ends) by carrotstix
this fic hurt like a bitch to read but it was too good to not put on here.
i like me better when im with you by dontstraytoofar
literally just choni being happy girlfriends supported by their friends. since, ya know, RAS doesn’t know how to do that.
I Turn to Wax (and Melt Like This) by Aurorazilla
the roadtrip au everybody needs.
so many legs (too many) by perpetual_gayness
one of the funniest fics i’ve ever read. cheryl and toni find a spider in their kitchen and call literally everyone they know to help.
sunday candy by dontstraytoofar
a fluffy, hilarious, feel-good fic where toni brings home a stray kitten and cheryl wants to kill both of them.
we get lost and we get found by SJAandDWfan
the fake dating au we all need in our lives. cheryl gets toni to fake date her to piss off her mom. good amount of angst and hurt/comfort but a happy ending.
all i do is give (and all you do is take) by retroria
cheryl and toni strike up a reluctant friendship, which later leads to more. or, cheryl blossom needs a hug and toni is more than willing to help.
I can take care of myself just fine by CrazyForCherry
everything by this author is amazing. this particular one is about toni getting the shit beat out of her and learning how to let cheryl help.
38 for the prompts: “Isn’t this amazing?” - as requested by anon
(this story took on a life of its own, because I really wanted to do a fair/theme park thing for our girls. Also, I usually don’t write stuff this fluffy, so I hope you guys enjoy it!)
“OK,” Toni spoke, dragging Cheryl behind her as she rushed through the crowded festival grounds, “we need to do the rifle booth now, so we can make it to the tilt-a-whirl before the line gets too big.”
“I thought you said you hated roller coasters and the whole shebang,” Cheryl said, digging her heels into the ground, forcing Toni to come to a halt. Toni turned to her with a frustrated pout as Cheryl let her hand fall to her side.
“I know,” Toni exhaled, “I may have forgotten how fun the non-scary part of the fair is.”
“Okay, but, you said,” Cheryl raised her hands in front of her and arched a perfectly groomed brow, “and I quote: “fair rides are death traps and the food is a breeding ground for E. coli.””
“I know what I said,” Toni stomped her foot, “but that only goes for the tall rides, the ones that nearly topple over if the wind blows. I like the ones close to the ground.”
“Does that include the ferris wheel?” Cheryl’s mouth fell open and she clutched a newly manicured hand to her heart.
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if ur hands are cold it’s just ur ghost boyfriend holding ur hand
my f
my feet are cold
36 for the prompts: “I’m so in love with you.” - as requested by anon
The sun rested low upon the evening sky, and Cheryl looked at Toni as the last rays of the day stretched across her delicate features. She smiled softly, curling one of Toni’s curls around her finger as her other hand rested upon the shorter girl’s hip. She pressed a kiss to her hair and hummed contentedly. Toni’s eyes fell closed and she leaned into Cheryl’s touch with a wistful smile.
They stood intertwined below the glowing neon signs of Pop’s Chocklit Shoppe, a delicate spring breeze weaving around their connected bodies. Toni shivered, draping her arms across her chest.
“Are you cold?” Cheryl immediately took notice, releasing Toni’s hair so that she could engulf her girlfriend in both her arms.
“No,” Toni denied, despite continuous shivers, “I don’t get cold.”
Cheryl rolled her eyes, tugging at Toni’s hips in an effort to turn her, putting them face to face. She grinned as her girlfriend looked at her with indignation, a slight pout on her face.
“Are you sure about that?” Cheryl said, raising her brows.
“Uh-huh. Would I ever lie to you?” Toni turned her nose to the sky in pure defiance, pink locks flowing through the air surrounding them.
“Something tells me you are right now.” Cheryl grinned and reached beneath the edge of Toni’s leather jacket to pinch her side, chuckling when Toni swatted her hand away with a groan.
“Cut it,” she pouted, grabbing a hold of Cheryl’s hand and returning it to its previous position on her hip.
“Just admit that you’re cold,” Cheryl pursed her lips and looked over her shoulder through the windows of Pop’s as she awaited a response.
Catching her by surprise, Toni leaned in for a peck, but found herself on the receiving end of a pale cheek instead. She drew back, crossing her arms once more, her entire stance screaming offense. Cheryl faced her with a smirk, further enraging her tiny girlfriend.
“What was that for?” Toni huffed.
“Liars don’t get kisses,” Cheryl spoke in a sing-song voice, her smirk growing ever wider. Toni’s mouth fell open before rapidly closing again.
“I might actually hate you,” she finally said.
“That is too bad,” Cheryl tugged her back into her arms, drawing her as close as they could possibly be while still being able to look at each other, “because I am so in love with you.”
Toni blushed sweetly, and her eyes darted from Cheryl to the ground, settling on Cheryl as she smiled.
“Fine,” she wrapped her arms around Cheryl, “I am cold.”
“What?” Cheryl’s brows flew to her hairline, her mouth dropping open in mock surprise, “why didn’t you just say so? Let’s go home!”
She draped her arm across Toni’s slim shoulders, steering them away from the parking lot and towards the path leading uptown. All the while, she talked a mile a minute about the do’s and dont’s of lying to her, and just what consequences a serious lie might have. Toni had to fear for the lives of those who ever dared try to fool her girlfriend, vowing to never be that person.
Just uploaded a choni oneshot, it will be one of many included in this series, maybe give it a read ❤️
147 for the prompts :)
This seemed sort of angsty, so I made it just a little angsty. Hope you like it!! (and thanks for your request)
147. “I can take care of myself just fine.”
The gravel crunched as people passed by outside the trailer, and Cheryl perked up at the sound. She was sat alone on the couch, painting her nails as she watched old reruns of Friends. Toni had left early that morning for some Serpent business, that she didn’t want Cheryl to know too much about. It had annoyed Cheryl, of course it had. She was so used to being in control of the situation, and being in the know when it came to the people around her. However, with Toni in her life, things were unpredictable. Obviously, Cheryl knew that being in a gang came with a set of tasks and responsibilities that required tending to, but it took their relationship moving to the next level for her to realize just how involved the other girl was.
Voices passed outside the trailer, carried by the fleeting wind of the night. No sign of Toni. All day the girl had failed to answer Cheryl’s text messages, and she was growing increasingly worried. She put down the nail polish and allowed the coat to dry as she watched the TV distractedly. She could not shake the feeling that something awful might have happened, that Toni might be in danger. She had texted Sweet Pea and Fangs too, had even contemplated reaching out to Jughead, but found that to be just a little too desperate. She could play the role of supportive, unquestioning girlfriend. Cheryl trusted Toni, hard as it may have been in the beginning.
The polish had dried by the time she heard a new set of movements outside, this time sounding like it was much closer by. Cheryl could hear frantic whispers through the window, having left it cracked open to let in some of the cool evening air. She was sure she could hear Sweet Pea, the frustration in his voice apparent. He sounded pained, his voice strained as he spoke. She couldn’t quite make out his words, as they were spoken quickly. She fought the urge to look out the window, not wanting to invade on the privacy of the tall boy, and whoever he was talking to.
That is, until she heard the voice of her girlfriend. She whispered much more successfully than Sweet Pea, making it impossible for Cheryl to hear a single word. Cheryl tried her hardest to pick up on even a single syllable, but it appeared that if Toni didn’t wish to be heard, she wouldn’t be. Her only clue as to the general tone of the conversation was Sweet Pea’s exaggerated groans and protests, as he tried to convince Toni of something Cheryl couldn’t figure out. She was just about to open the window and call out to the pair, when their voices stopped, and the sound of footsteps in the gravel sounded once more. She hurried into a somewhat casual position, fixing her gaze on the TV as Toni opened the door with force.
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Pairing: Toni Topaz + Cheryl Blossom
The Color Series - a collection of moods and the feelings that accompany them.
First installment: white
virginity, humility, innocence and youth.
word count: 5832
rated M
The First Time
Flaming red hair burns the palms of her hands, scorching her in the most tantalizing manner. She clutches fists full of the enticing, silky strands, as their mouths move in perfect sync. She can feel Cheryl’s hands at the hem of her t-shirt, fingertips grazing the soft skin hidden behind the Beavis and Butthead print. Her own hands clench and unclench from their spot, buried deep in the locks she’s grown so fond of. Repeatedly she grabs and pulls, before smoothing and caressing.
The springs of the worn out couch protest beneath her as Cheryl moves to sit completely on top of her, straddling her lap with those delectable long legs of hers. The move sounds an alarm in Toni’s head, alerting her to the fact that this will be over soon. She moves her hands carefully, smoothing down the crumbled fabric of Cheryl’s shirt as she strokes down her back and places her palms against her bare thighs.
It’s a common exchange of actions - they’ll be devouring each other, hands touching and squeezing, until Cheryl moves on top and gains the control. From her perch upon Toni’s lap she has the power to cut off her actions. It is a power move. One that tells Toni that she is done for now, that they won’t be going any further right now. Toni’s okay with it, of course she is. However, she’d be lying if she said she didn’t feel an all-consuming need to discover more, to see, feel, taste.
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