Matthew Skiff
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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@fuckyeahcronea
Matthew Skiff
CAMILA MENDES as DREA TORRES Do Revenge (2022)
Vwell, Kitten
Author: Oshii
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1,715
Chapters: 1
“Aranea Serket had a big, fat crush on Cronus Ampora.”
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aranea/cronus fic dont like dont read
Imagine going to a party and the cerulean 8looded sburban stay at home mom with two overachiever grubs and violet-blooded seadwelling dad who barbeques but doesn’t know how to barbeque and yet is always surrounded by other highblood Dads who compliment his barbequing even though they’re just store bought preshaped frozen patties, alchemized from Ralph’s or Food 4 Less and while he’s cooking those, the cerulean mom comes out and says “okay kids, here’s some troll pizza!”
And she pulls out a slice of watermelon covered in grubs and fruit and shit and starts telling the kids why its “fun troll pizza” and then cries in her master cocoonroom when no one likes it or finishes it and cronus is then consoling her why she sobs that she’s a terrible lusus standin and ruined her fourth grade straight B+ sons wriggling day and thinks her kids hate her but they don’t care
but aranea continues crying softly into her slime while the children eat poorly cooked burgers with unmelted kraft singles and too much mayonnaise and the only other condiments are two pickles and pepper because the dad calls it his special burger with a secret spice, but the spice was just pepper
and the kids just keep playing E rated games on their Game Grub while the 17 year old older sister starts cleaning the tragedy up and throwing away uneaten “fun troll pizza” and whole burgers dejected from the start while she dials Troll Pizza Hut to get these kids an actual wriggling day lunch and the mother then throws a fit because the daughter did something the kids liked and she didn’t and was the only one making a huge deal out of it and the daughter was then grounded from her TV in her room for only two days
and the son went to blow out the candles in his standard wriggling day cake from food 4 less that Aranea added strawberries to so she could feel she did something but was still slightly teary and sad because her day was ruined by no one wanting to eat her “fun troll pizza”
((i sat through an entire rockabilly dance competition to write this omg it was the greatest.))
“Well well well.” Cronus’ voice rang throughout the building, thick with that familiar accent Aranea was 90% sure he was doing on purpose. “Crud, uh, pretend I didn’t say anything. Pretty sure that was what completely killed that line I had for Meenah way back when."
Aranea let out a little breath, plodding down the hall way with burdened steps. "Cronus, I thought I agreed to be taught to dance, not bear witness to your barrage of awful pick up lines."
She rounded the corner and saw Cronus leaning against the door way, waiting for her. Past him she could spot some lonely and awfully dejected furniture that had been pushed against the walls, covered in a cloth. In a corner, sitting on top of a coffee table, was a stereo. ”‘Course you did, and what a cool cat you are to do that for me. I’ve got a lot of sensitive feelings you know, and no one seems to care that they walk all over them all the time.“
"Right.” Aranea cleared her throat, smoothing down her skirt and sitting down carefully next to the stereo set. “But you do remember why I went along with this entirely ridiculous notion, don’t you?”
Cronus sighed, and for a moment his face almost looked somber before his lips curled into his signature quirky grin again and he mumbled, “Yeah, yeah, because I begged you for nearly a week and spilled nearly half my entire life story to you for your Sylph of Light information services. You were my last hope, Aranea, but definitely not my last choice.” Throwing a wink her way he marched over to the stereo set, playing around with the knobs and slipping in a disc from his pocket.
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I gotta admit, I actually like @botgalhs’s bloodswap Aranea better than canon Aranea, so here’s what I did for our art/fic exchange
I FINNISHED IT MOTHERUFKCERS
collaboration with giraffes
man ive been looking for this! beachstuck!cronea
EDIT: changed the eye colors
Wvho do you thank wvhen you havwe such luck? I’m in love I’m all shook up
Cronus [x] Aranea [x] Photos/Editing [x]
“I knew you were trou8le when you walked in..”
Cronus and Aranea - Otakon 2013 Cronus Ampora / Aranea Serket / Photographer
self indulgent crap
I don’t know the owner of the flowers. if you do please tell me
Fun fact: in Finland, this is a sport.
Sketch | muppidupp Lineart | appulsprite Colour | skeppsbrott
Genderbent Cronea
Cronus would still be a big flirt~<3
AraneaxCronus`s jacket is my secret OTP ok
CRONEA crossover with Grease - Summer Night [c'mon, Cronus is SOOO much Danny Zuko, Aranea is pefect for Sandy, for not mention that i actually ship it ]
Have you tried flirting with Aranea?
once upon a time, yeah.
but then i decided i didnt vwanna havwe my bulge near kooky mind-controlling dames who havwe an alternate timeline complex.
heres something though; she flirted vwith me once. vwas it the best thing ewver, youre probably vwondering?
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