oozey mess
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
NASA
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
if i look back, i am lost
Mike Driver
sheepfilms
blake kathryn
RMH
Cosmic Funnies
occasionally subtle
untitled
Three Goblin Art
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Keni
todays bird
PR's Tumblrdome
No title available
Jules of Nature
$LAYYYTER
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from Malaysia
seen from Poland
seen from Peru
seen from Germany
seen from Argentina
@fusionpoweredasexual
We're doing renovations, so today I just got to watch a Kobelco SK210LC excavator roll into my backyard and tear down a building.
This is, without a doubt, the happiest, most awesome, enlightening, informative, exhilarating, thrilling, inspiring, beautiful and awesome day in my life.
I used the word awesome twice to explain just awesome it was.
I have been stuck in an airport waiting for my plane for the last seventeen hours after my first flight was cancelled.
I wish I knew how to play the harmonica so that I could slouch by a wall and play melancholic music like a grizzeld old cowboy in a no-where town somewhere in the wild west. Stuck in this dirthole for far too long, and Having long ago given up on ever seeing my darling clementine again, just wondering whether it'll be a pinkerton or an outlaw that gets me first.
Bro that hit me so hard im sitting here just trying to not send a sappy paragraph to every single one of my friends and apologize for any time ive made them slightly upset
Let's not forget the part where the friends get completely confused and ask you what the hell you're talking about, before explaining that they actually weren't upset, and that you just overanalyzed their body language.
Of course, now you've wasted their time, and by insinuating that they were mad at tou you might as well have called them bad friends, thus indirectly insulting them which means you have to write up another paragraph apologizing for your new transgresssions. Which causes your friends to once again explain that you didn't upset them and so on and so forth.
No, I am not speaking from experience, this is just a crazy hypothetical.
The lizards
Pellaeon: *very seriously* You need to stop doing weird things to cope with the stress. Going outside might help. Thrawn: I went into the jungle today. Pellaeon: There you go! I hope you got something from that. Thrawn: *opening his coat, revealing a Ysalamir* This lizard.
Pellaeon: Oh, I see! Is thia a chiss tradition? Perhaps a cherished childhood activity?
Thrawn: Nope
Pellaeon: Okay, well having a pet might help distract you from stress, just make sure you don't get overwhelmed taking care of this uh... lizard.
Thrawn: Lizards, commander Pellaeon
Pellaeon: Lizards?
Thrawn: *Shakes his coat and six more Ysalamiri fall out*
Pellaeon: ...
Pellaeon: *under his breath* I suppose it's better than adopting random imperial officers.
Thrawn: I miss Eli
I'd personally add a similarily bloodstained labcoat to the top of the pyramid, just to really tie together the mad scientist aesthetic.
Pick an experiment to be promoted to my lab assistant.
A colony of lab rats that share a collective hivemind and are sentient
A robot who pinky promised not to turn evil and destroy humanity
Regular sized spider with human intelligence
Tube grown anime catboy that hates me for creating him
Fungal colony that talks through a vtuber model its hooked up to
Reanimated Quetzalcoatlus specimen jurassic park style
The shambling mass of nerves and muscles that's surprisingly competent in a lab
Brain in a jar that doesn't know it's a brain in a jar
Inanimate death ray
Robot butler who can't handle complex instructions
Harbour seal with a translation collar that listens to the joe rogan podcast
My own evil clone
No it's not that I don't appreciate the flirting, I just wish you wouldn't do it while I'm in the middle of vivisecting you. Yes I know that it's really hot when I'm covered in your blood elbow deep in your chest cavity that's why I keep vivisecting you. But I keep getting flustered and dropping your liver and its really slippery so I keep dropping it over and over again leading to very comedic slapstick comedy where I slip on your blood and fall over really funny
This is why I invested into a surgery robot. No chance of awkward social interactions, and you can use a neat little joystick instead of actually touching squicky biological matter. My surgery robot even has the operation buzzer noise for when I pinch of the wrong artery.
imagine you’re a guard for your castle, and you see this lady calling for help and saying she’s the queen, so you bring her in and everyone watches as she fucking eats the babies in there and just goes, “yep. Sure. New queen.” Because she got them, along with you, all high on psychedelics. And then she transforms into a giant fucking blue creature and crawls away, never to be seen again.
At first glance i didn't realize this was about a wildlife documentary, and was left wondering whether this was a scenario written by a tumblr user or an actual greek myth.
Romance clichés, Furries and 19th century American litterarture
In an enemies to lovers plot, obsession often plays an important role. Ususally, this manifests in a characters hate for the future love interest growing so intense it transforms into some sort of twisted infatuation, which through contrivances of the plot can be turned into an actual relationship, healthy or not.
If we accept the pipeline of hate leading through obsession to pseudo-infatuation as an initial stage in an enemies to lovers story, we must then consider whether captain Ahab from litterary classic Moby Dick can be classified as a furry, or an appropriate equivalent for acquatic mammals
I have made a severe and continuous lapse in my judgment
Hello fellow scientists with a questionable moral compass. I hope your doomsday devices are working well and your laboratories haven´t been destroyed by any superheroes.
I am writing because I have recently been confronted with some events that have caused me a great deal of stress and emotional turmoil and as everyone knows the best way to handle bad news is by complaining to strangers online.
I was recently allowed access to the Evil Supercomputer at my Evil University so that I could perform my research. Because of this I spent the entire weekend working, thus neglecting an important social event (building a Lego death star with my friends).
However it was not for vain, my research succeeded and now I have designed an artificial robot-virus that will take control of the minds of everyone it infects. Finally! I am unstoppable! Cue the evil laugh!
Or so I thought, apparently the software I used to design the robo-plague was not a dedicated research program, it was a video game! This means that I did not spend the weekend doing world-changing research, I spent it playing videogames! If I wanted to do that I could have just stayed at home.
Oh well, at least I did create a design for a stealth space station, equipped with ICBMs. For any Evil scientists that are working with spacecraft I really have to recommend you use this software for aerospace design I found, it´s called Kerbal Space Program.
I remember someone saying "mad scientists in fiction aren't scientists because there's never a control group"
I think if you've created an elixir that turns people into goat men you have sort have gone past the need for a control group. The control group is not going to placebo themselves into goat men. You can probably not run the control group, and safely assume that none of them would have turned into goat men. That said, having a control group for that would make the mad scientist seem extra crazy and be really really funny, especially if he was carefully testing them for goat like features from the dyed water they drank instead of the elixir
I used a control group for testing my death laser. I placed five "willing" subjects in front of the death laser and five in front of a placebo laser. The placebo laser was a water gun painted with silver paint, and to simulate it firing the death star firing sequence played on a loudspeaker.
When I tried the deathlaser all five subjects experienced rapid molecular dissasembly due to a rapid increase in contained thermal energy, which was expected since, well, it's a death laser.
Hoewever, one of the subjects in the placebo group also disintegrated, seemingly as an effect of the placebo laser. Now, I know a sample size of five isn't exactly scientifically sound, but the possibility that 20% of the general population is capable of disintegrating from a placebo laser is worrying, and calls into attention wheter death lasers are actually necessary.
Evil science is not just chemistry!
There is a very common misconception about evil science which is that it´s all chemistry. Most evil scientists in pop culture are chemists with weird colored stains on their lab coats (horribly unsafe and irresponsible but that´s not the point I'm trying to make today). Compared to the amount of test tubes and Bunsen burners you never see any evil radio telescopes or evil MRI machines. I think this stereotype stems from the fact that evil chemists tend to die in very spectacular ways.
Evil chemists usually tend to get incinerated by massive fireballs or swallowed by tsunamis of acid. This is nearly always more dramatic than most other evil scientists, to combat this misconception and spread more awareness about evil science, I´ve constructed a short list detailing the most common types of death for different disciplines of evil science.
Evil physicists tend to get stuck and starve inside the particle accelerators, or they get crushed by the mountains or whiteboards, notebooks and papers that tend to accumulate in their rooms.
Evil zoologists get eaten at an alarming rate during field expeditions, and those that aren´t are usually found with poison in their bloodstream.
Evil geneticists and evil roboticists are more alike than you´d think, since they are usually killed by their artificially created lifeforms in extremely preventable situations usually stemming from treating said creations in very cruel ways.
No one has seen the evil astronomers since they tried to build a death star around Jupiter.
Evil Immunologists, the scientists specializing in weird diseases and their impact on humans, I think their cause of death is quite obvious.
Evil engineers tend to kill each other fighting for an obscure type of screw that only exists in a single IKEA in the world that they somehow all need for their project, and if you care about your personal wellbeing do not suggest that they replace it with a more common type of screw.
So the next time you see an evil chemist dying spectacularly as their laboratory gets swallowed by fire and poison, please do remember that that is not representative evil science as a whole.
This has been an evil science PSA with you friendly neighbourhood supervillain, Fusionpoweredasexual, thank you for listening to my ted talk.
hello. I hope you're not a bot, but if you are humanoid to some definition then congrats on the sick url and good taste in fun unethical science blogging
Why thank you kind being! While I can not prove my humanity I hope you find it reassuring to hear that I posess the same degree of sentience as most humans. Looking forward to starting a career in evil science and showing the world that I was right all along.
