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Hi! This is going to be long and not to sound rude but I would really like ur full thoughts on this ask!

In your fic “Genya’s No Good, Very Bad Day” I saw a few comment exchanges talking about how ur sexual pet AU is a critique on misogyny. I really loved the conversations you had with others and thought you were really thorough and deliberate with how you chose to write the way misogyny leaks into people unconsciously and how intensely ingrained it is socially in the fic’s context itself, but also in a “meta” sense as you the author explained your work! I won’t go over the topic to much bc I think the comments speak for itself, but after reading those comments and reflecting on your fic, it made me really really rethink a lot of it, which helped me put together the previous feelings I stated!! (I’m not saying ur intentions didn’t come off well at first, they certainly did, I was just too genya-abuse-love-brained to think with anything other than my dick when I first read it sorry!!!)

Anyways, it made me wonder was the au made simply for pwp reasons and then it evolved into a critique on misogyny as you thought about our current sex culture and how it would affect the laws around the pet AU or was it always supposed to be a critique on how “f/m” relationships work under sexism and patriarchy?

And hopefully I don’t loose the plot with this next question, but: in a “canonical” or “canonical interpretation” of Sanegen’s relationship, do you think there is a patriarchal component to it which might have inspired you to write this fic?

I’m on Twitter mostly, and there’s a lot of Korean sanegen artist who refer to Sanemi as the “patriarchal eldest son” (as a bit and seriously) and I also find it interesting that Genya seems to be a slightly feminine character comparatively to other male characters? In a traditional feminine sense, past his aggression and design and more within his personality and wants. Like, he seems to have taken on more of a domestic than providing role when it comes to the shinazugawa family, he struggles with not having the ability to use breathing/thinking of himself as weaker bc of it, and there’s a moment in the novel “tales of a butterfly” where Genya is stated to be struggling with the idea of “never becoming a true man bc he unquestionably follows Sanemi’s lead” and is described as someone who has “girlish dreams” of reuniting with his brother. (I sometimes view his character to have a close representation to what its like to grow up as female who wants to prove herself to be equal esp in the eyes of a patriarchal Asian family)

While it’s most likely unintentional, I think Sanemi and Genya naturally have a “patriarchal” dynamic as Sanemi is this brooding self sacrificial fatherly eldest son figure and Genya is his defending and subordinate little brother. And I think that patriarchal vibe is ultra amplified when you think about how hard Genya wants to “be equal” to Sanemi.

Sooo like basically TLDR:

1) do you think misogyny/Patriarchal standards exist between sanegen as a dynamic/characters and what are your thoughts about it

2) does any inspiration behind “Genya’s no good, very bad day” stem from any of those thoughts? If not, besides for the sake of pwp what led you to creating the fic and having it critique misogyny!

(Tidbit again, but as someone who recently started to identify as a “proshipper” but has always cared more about the respect and ingerity of art being made and overall hating the “pro & anti discourse” I was really moved when I saw your thoughts about misogyny, esp when you mentioned how there’s ppl like giyuu and obanai who are victims but also can’t afford to help bc of fear and social hierarchies. I’ve always seen ppl say “proship content is for xyz” but this fan work as been one of the few that genuinely made me feel like “oh this person made this thing that I really resonate with and it hits me emotionally as much as it does hormonally!” It’s equally the concepts of “this dark thing is a critique on how I suffer” + “it’s also an emotionally liberating thing to read bc it comforts and exposes me to that fear without actually making me suffer.” It’s such a good fic, I’ve read it twice and it made me wanna reread trials and tribulations with more thought in mind!! Please never stop writing!! I love your work!!!)

First, thank you so much for thinking so hard about my work. I love it when the effort and thought I put into something is reflected back to me by readers. Messages like this are why I put my whole heart and soul into everything I write because if even one person gives a fuck, it was worth it.

For my thought process, my entire writing process in general, it always goes

1. Damn, wouldn't it be hot if-

2. But how can I make that make sense and how would that actually work in the real world

That second thought is why I leaned so hard into my thoughts on misogyny. For this fic, the OG thought was "wouldn't it be hot if Genya got fucked in front of all his teachers?" LMAO then I had to ask myself "In what kind of world would that make sense? In what situation would nobody say anything about that? Why wouldn't anyone try to stop it?" Those questions are where theme arises from in my experience. I don't start with a theme and work backwards, I start with what I want to write then consider real world application, what is similar, what am I representing, what do I want to say about those things? For Trials, a lot of it is my reflections on being abused by my father. Questions like, "is it possible for the victim to hold any blame?" The answer is no, but as someone who has felt intensely guilty over the situation for about a decade, it's a question I have to confront within myself daily. The original idea was "KimeGakuen SaneGen gets found out," but then, real world application. Under what situation does their relationship make sense? What do I want to say about their relationship and the situation that spawned it? Real world application and my thoughts on those real-world situations. This resulted in things like choosing to display the issue with their age gap by seeing Genya's inability to comprehend the issue due to being the groomed younger party.

Ig the real answer here is that I hate escapism. I hate power fantasies, romantic fantasies, all of it. My favorite literary movement is Modernism because it was about trying to portray the reality of the human mind. Is it often confusing and nonsensical? Yes, but it's also very grounded and it's always trying to say something about the human condition. On top of that, Modernists deliberately subverted Romanticism. Instead of imagining a beautiful world of nature to feel better about living in a city, they looked inward at the darkness, the depravity, the sadness and the reality of the human mind (while living in a city LOL). What I'm getting at is, my brain always starts with a fantasy, but it never ends there. I don't want a fantasy; I want to see the reality of that fantasy. In the PWP fic, the reality of underage, teacher/student, incest exhibitionism is objectification, detachment, and normalization. I would use all of those to describe my experience of misogyny as a woman. I chose to draw on and incorporate those experiences while writing because those experiences are real. That's the reality hidden behind the sexual fantasy.

I want to make very clear, my feelings on escapism and fantasy are in no way an indictment of people who write or enjoy reading escapism and fantasy. If you don't wanna think while you jack off, you shouldn't have to. Every form of literature belongs in this world and everyone is allowed to write what they want purely for the sake of writing. It's simply not what I like to write and I'm more than happy to welcome anyone who is comfortable into my philosophical circle jerk.

On to the topic of patriarchal Sanemi, honestly I feel it influenced Trials more than GNGVBD (holy shit that acronym). In Gakuen he is very fathercoded. He literally is allowed to take away Genya's free play tickets for the festival's shooting booth. That's essentially the funny anime high school comedy version of taking away his phone privileges. For me, it's less viewing Genya as feminine and more viewing him as a child. Girlish dreams yes, with emphasis on girl as an age and less as a gender. He holds onto what I'd personally describe more as childish dream than of a feminine dream. He dreams of becoming a big, strong adult who is respected by his abusive, dismissive parent. It's very typical for children to believe that if they're just *better* their parent will love and respect them, if they fix what is wrong about themself, their parent will approve of them. The reality of abuse, like the reality with Sanemi, is nothing will ever be enough. It doesn't matter how hard Genya tries, he will not gain Sanemi's approval. Obv, I'm ignoring the elephant in the room of Sanemi loving Genya all along and that's kinda problematic for the interpretation I just laid out LOL From what I just argued, that means Gotoge is saying abusive parents love their kids and just want to protect them. Which, I don't think they were trying to say. Though also, if you read Gakuen Sanemi's "you have to get a 100% or I will restrict your freedoms and take away something you worked really hard for" (which is something parents do), is portrayed as love and simply "wanting the best for Genya." Which is kind of wild imo.

I won't dismiss the merits of a feminine reading of Genya (I'd be a hypocrite as I call him my "baby girl") and I feel that way of relating to him might be why there is so much trans Genya content. Specifically, people relating to struggling with construct of not being man enough and of facing constant disapproval. That said, I'm not trans and can't speak to why trans men relate to him with any form of authority. I'd be happy to listen to any trans man's perspective on this as I find the frequency of trans male Genya within the SaneGen fandom interesting as fuck. I love identifying and understanding trends within niche fanfic communities PLEASE TALK TO ME I'M BEGGING YOU

(Finally, about proshipping and other fandom discourse: I'm a literature major. We all agree, universally, censorship is bad. I believe in criticism and critical analysis. I believe is discussing critically the beliefs, biases, and morality behind works of fiction, but I don't believe in banning them. Art has a right to exist for the sake of art. That is and always will be a core tenant of my beliefs. I do think what someone writes says something about them, but not in a 1 to 1, direct way. Writing shotacon doesn't mean you want to go out and fuck a real child, but everything anyone writes will always be fundamentally influenced by their upbringing, sociocultural background, and education. I write the way I write because I have an education in literature. Analyzing the meaning in books and short stories and poems is quite literally what I do all day. My opinion on parents as a whole is influenced by my view of my own parents. For example, in Trials, I was genuinely *shocked* by the outrage directed at Shizu. I didn't even think about it. To me, as someone whose mom did nothing about the sexual abuse I experienced, Shizu's actions to protect herself seemed completely reasonable. I genuinely was not trying to make Shizu out to be a bad person, just a real person who I love and want to maintain my relationship with, just my mom. I viewed Shizu as *more justifiable* than my mom because there was never any threat of violence in my house, she just took my (14 year old) word that I wanted it to stay a secret. All that said, I will always be a proshipper bc I'm not about to throw under the bus the only people willing to stand up for me in return. Cutting off limbs of any community will never help anyone and only makes us easier to destroy.)

I hope you found this answer properly comprehensive LOL. Feel free to ask follow up if you need or want clarification <3

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