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@geriatriccrimeblotter
Man Murdered Wife For Making the Ketchup Bottle Too Hard to Open
"Among the "grievances" Lawrence Loeffler used to justify the murder of his wife Betty to police was her insistence on putting the ketchup bottle lid on "too tightly."
Prosecutors told an Oregon jury that Loeffler was also upset about his stepdaughter not wishing him a happy birthday."
84-year-old New Mexico woman on oxygen tank indicted on charges she was trafficking drugs
KRQE-TV reports (http://bit.ly/10pHzTh ) that Lillie Smith was recently indicted by a Bernalillo County grand jury for trafficking, conspiracy to commit trafficking, tampering with evidence and possession. Read more: http://www.montrealgazette.com/news/world/84yearold+Mexico+woman+oxygen+tank+indicted+charges/8425973/story.html#ixzz2U98lw0IN
Woman, 80, Swallows Diamond at Fla. Charity Event
TAMPA, Fla. (AP) — The idea behind the Tampa Women's Club charity event was simple. For $20, you could buy a flute of champagne and a chance to win a one-carat, $5,000 diamond.
Drunk Florida Woman Calls 911 Out of Loneliness, Gets Arrested
"On March 30, a woman in Florida started drinking to combat her loneliness. She soon became drunk. Standard enough, right? We've all been there. Less standard, however, is what the woman did next. According to police reports, 64-year-old Fleurette French then called 911 to report a fake medical issue. When a medic arrived on the scene, French told him the truth."
My 90 year old grandmother tries the Oculus Rift. (by Paul Rivot)
Still under the impression that video games are strictly for kids? Hilda Knott would like to have a word with you. And perhaps a game.
The 85-year-old British gamer has been mashing buttons for 40 years — roughly the life of the video game industry – and is showing no signs of slowing down.
We’re not talking about just a bunch of boring PC card games, either. In a video interview with the BBC, Knott, who turns 86 next month, shows off her formidable gaming setup, including a sweet 65-inch HDTV and a brand new Playstation 3 Superslim. She discusses her love of Grand Theft Auto IV, which she had a “hilarious” time playing with her 94-year-old-aunt.
Knott acknowledges that her deep love of gaming has helped her stay mentally fit, because “a lot of them have puzzles, working out how to do something.”
She isn’t joking, either, as the video shows her playing the niche tactical role-playing game, Disgaea 4. That’s hardcore. This lady is a gamer, through and through.
And while many of her fellow octogenarians credit games like Wii Sports for keeping them physically active, Knott’s favorite part about playing video games will sound more familiar to the Halo crowd.
“Finding something new in the game,” she says. “Getting on to the next stage, or the next event. And the achievement of finishing it.”
With 40 years of gaming under her belt, we imagine she’s finished quite a few. Hats off to you, Hilda!
Fuck yeah
Eleanor Fairchild, great-grandmother, stands in front of a bulldozer that is demolishing forests on her land without her consent.
Thanks, darthnickels!
Oklahoma Grandmother Locks Herself to Keystone XL Heavy Machinery — Halts Construction "ALLEN, OK – Tuesday, April 9, 2013, 9:00 AM – Oklahoma grandmother Nancy Zorn, 79, from Warr Acres, has locked herself to a piece of heavy machinery effectively halting construction on TransCanada’s Keystone XL toxic tar sands pipeline."
The mayor of Mississauga, Canada is a badass. via
Hazel McCallion, everbody.
92 years old,
34 years in office,
$0 in debt
$700 million in reserve
Eight prime ministers
One truck.
But women aren’t strong leaders… OH WAIT.
Now I’m sure somebody’s gonna tell me something but
supports a Palestinian state
supports Aids CHarities
told her city well if we cant get money y’all need to pay taxes and maintains a 76 approval rating
nick named Hurricane Hazel
and is so boss lady that she don’t run she’ tells  folks to give that money to charity
Elderly Gang Members Arrested for Selling Cannon, Guns to Undercover Police Officers
Elderly members of three biker gangs were arrested on Tuesday for selling undercover officers a cannon, 41 guns and thousands of rounds of ammunition. Eight members of the Forbidden Ones, Dirty Ones and Trouble Makers were charged with firearms trafficking this week, after a two year investigation, reports the NY Daily News.
The three gangs allegedly sold numerous weapons out of tattoo parlors in Brooklyn and Queens.
Four of the elderly thugs were too ill to make their arraignment in Brooklyn Federal Court. Scott Brannigan, 61, complained of high blood pressure, Frank Miranda, 50, and Samuel Moya, 44, needed detox and Jose Perez, 49, needed treatment for sleep apnea, reports the NY Daily News.
Members of the Forbidden Ones earned “bangout patches" as a badge of honor for assaulting NYPD cops, according to court papers.
Last year, five police officers were hurt by gang members who attacked them with brass knuckles, knives and a baseball bat.
A MESSAGE TO VOTERS: GERIATRIC CRIME BLOTTER APPROVES THIS MESSAGE
Elderly Woman Faces Jail Time for Removing Campaign Signs Featuring Obama with Hitler Mustache
An elderly Connecticut woman who experienced the second World War first-hand was arrested this week and charged with sixth-degree larceny and breach of peace for removing three signs depicting President Obama with Adolf Hitler's signature mustache.
"I just got very angry that they would do that to [President] Obama's image," 80-year-old Nancy Lack of Hebron told NBC Connecticut.
The posters were supporting the campaign of controversial perennial presidential candidate Lyndon LaRouche, and called for Obama's impeachment.
The message wasn't what got Lack so hot and bothered — it was the casual use of Nazi symbolism. "My generation went through the Second World War," she said, "and Nazism is about the worst there can be."
Lack collected the posters and put them in her car as LaRouche supporter watched. "I said, 'Make sure you get my license plate," she recalled.
As for her arrest, Lack was surprised but understanding. "I guess I deserved it. I stole the posters," she told the news outlet.
Lack is due in court next week. A conviction could mean up to three months in jail and a fine.
Elderly couple busted with 1,000 marijuana plants
RCMP in Hants County have arrested an elderly couple and seized more than one thousand marijuana plants.
Thursday afternoon the Enfield RCMP Street Crime Enforcement Unit, with the assistance of the RCMP Federal Drug Unit, executed a search warrant at a residence in Hardwood Lands.
Along with the plants, police also seized one pound of dried marijuana and a quantity of cash.
The 70 year old man and 68 year old woman face charges of production of marijuana. They have been released from custody on a promise to appear in court in Shubenacadie on Dec. 17.
Elderly man accused of selling roxycodone to undercovers
SPRINGFIELD, LA (WAFB) -
A 69-year-old man was arrested on drug and gun charges after narcotics agents searched his home Monday.
The Livingston Parish Sheriff's Office reported Hollis Firmin Jr. of Springfield was taken into custody on charges of distribution of Schedule II CDS (3 counts) and possession of an illegal firearm.
Detectives said they made several undercover drug buys from Firmin.
Deputies said he sold them roxycodone, which led to the search warrant and his arrest.
Investigators said the search turned up a sawed-off shotgun and a stolen shotgun.
The sawed-off shotgun is illegal because of its length.
Firmin was booked into the Livingston Parish Detention Center.
His bond was set at $325,000.
"Chinese Grandma Tries to Shut Down a Microsoft Event, Then Things Get Ugly"
"According to Sina, the noise was apparently keeping her grandchildren awake—a problem since the next day was a schoolday. So the grandma and the grandpa decided to do more than complain: grandma got on stage and tried to shut the whole event down. That's when staff dragged the old lady off stage. You can also see the grandfather (in red) being pulled off stage, too."
