[oak23]

Truly iconic.

[badjokesbyjeff]

A guy goes into a bar and orders a beer. Bartender says, “that’ll be a dollar”

The guy thinks, “man, that’s cheap,” but the beer was delicious. So he finishes his beer and decides to take a chance. “Bartender, I’ll have your finest wine” bartender goes through a long process of showing the bottle. Opening it. Aerating the wine. Pouring it into nice a nice glass and says. “That’ll be 50 cents”. The guy can’t believe it. So he thinks ‘fuck it ’ and says “I’ll have a whole bottle of your best scotch “. The bartender hands it to him and says “here. On the house”. Curiosity finally gets the better of the guy. He asks “ok. Where’s the owner” bartender replies “upstairs with my wife”. The guy asks “what’s he doing upstairs with your wife?” And the bartender looks the man in the eye and replies “same thing I’m doing to his business”…

[daughter-of-sapph0]

Hey Jeff, change your url please.

[gendice]

what's a twink?

blonde american snack 

[enochianghost]

you’re thinking of a twinkie a twink is when you only blink one eye

[natsumischwartz]

no that’s a wink

a twink is a fixture commonly found in kitchens and bathrooms

[snzical]

nah, you’re thinking of a sink

twink is the stuff that comes from squids and makes pens and markers work

[nucleartourist]

that’s ink

a twink is a coil of plastic or metal that people push down stairs for fun

[stomachkrampus]

No, you’re thinking of a slinky

A twink is when your hose gets bent in a weird way and water can’t flow through it anymore

[gendice]

nope, that’s a kink 

twink is definitely the catchphrase of velma from scooby doo

[boombazled]

No, thats jinkies

Twink is when you get an idea

[hamncheeeese]

nah fam, that’s think(ing)

twink is a lighter shade or red

[jotarofucks-archive-deactivated]

Nah that’s pink

A twink is that one character from the legend of zelda

[gendice]

you’re not wrong

[thecommonchick]

LMAO 😂😭

[hailvictoria420]

LITERALLY WHAT I WOULD DO

[buzzfeed]

Oh, Canada.

[michelleumunna]

[booksfunquotes]

[momunofu-deactivated20150808]

chillin on a Saturday night

[thepope]

Calm down jojo

[momunofu-deactivated20150808]

you’re right, I am looking a little stiff here, I should try to relax

[sparkafterdark-deactivated20181]

You call that “chillin”?

Everyone knows the best way to relax is with a good book and a warm drink

[totallyfubar]

I dunno, man,

 sometimes I like just relaxing on my laptop

[witchchad-deactivated20160310]

get on my level boys

[sparkafterdark-deactivated20181]

Unfortunately to “get on your level” I’d need a boat trip to the Mariana Trench and a pair of cinderblock shoes.

[nerdgul]

Thats gotta be the sickest burn ive ever read holy fuck

[quinzel-isley]

48 years ago a girl said “oh fuck me” to her best friend while walking in the street, a guy who randomly passed by answered by “let me at least buy you dinner first”. I present to you my grandparents, in love since then and celebrating their 47 years of marriage today.

[mybeltruns]

grandpa got game

[lesbianblush-deactivated2018053]

[novellearts]

oh my goddd. I thought it was great from the beginning but it only gets better

[brooklyn99]

[brooklyn99]

[urieokay]

I will never get over the Jazz version of ‘But it’s better if you do’. Never.

[butitsbetterifyoudont-deactivat]

I reblog this everytime I get the chance.

[uernard-brine]

I can’t

[uernard-brine]

[poeticnuisanc3]

when you realise you don’t have a band…

[uernard-brine]

TRIGGERED

[allthingsparksandrecreation]

The Chris and Ben work dynamic is hilarious

[blazedbbyy]

my favorite scene in the whole tv history

[the-movemnt-deactivated20170912]

#DontNormalizeHate PSA shows parallels between Muslim registry and Japanese internment

[la-babyyk-deactivated20170308]

this was powerful