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Warden | 19 | she/they

[ghostfightarchive]

no longer uft/s

[doribuki]

emily: oh my god i love this dramatic fucker lena can we keep her

[ghostfightarchive]

human and alien roommates

alien: hey craig you know how youre always trying to force some wacky "humans are so special" dynamic on us

human: um

alien: well i think i finally found something for you

alien: humans are the only race that won't do the fucking dishes, craig

[kennedraw-deactivated20240914]

a helpful chart for your moviegoing needs. I sat through 40 minutes of a movie trying to figure out which one of these guys was in it.

[rapunzelie]

My sister’s boyfriend is from Russia and he just graduated from college so his parents are visiting from Moscow and they speak very little English and I almost lost it today laughing because they absolutely loved my sister’s wiener dog like they were entirely amused by this dog and his dad was just sitting next to the wiener dog, admiring him, and softly saying in the thickest Russian accent “little dog….small dog….little dog”

[rapunzelie]

I’m delighted you all enjoyed this

[toboios]

[vasuki-blog]

I just heard a girl outside yell “PARKOUR” really loudly immediately followed by a dull thud on the ground and a softer “ugh” and I’m laughing really hard

[sandsvendor100]

seymour i think i'm a lesbian what do

Woman

[vampirewknd]

Oh, come now, do you really think you can beat me as I am now? Fool!

[anti-feminism-pro-girl-power-de]

Maybe that person you called racist or homophobic or accused or being sexist is secretly breaking down inside. Maybe they’re crying as they see your hate. Maybe they have feelings just like you 

[femininechrist]

I don’t care.

[caden]

• Normalize going to Burger King at 3 am • Normalize falling asleep inside the Burger King • NORMALIZE filling up your empty milk jugs with drinks from the sofa fountain • NORMALIZE JACKING IT IN THE BK BATHROOM • NORMALIZE FIGHTING THE MANAGER

[caden]

•NORMALIZE •FINDING •AND KILLING •THE BURGER KING

[mgsintegral-deactivated20170715]

Bad day?

[caden]

GREAT DAY

[caden]

hold on, wait, im canceling this post for a fucking second

in what possible fucking way is this #gaybottomproblems

[cosmicsignificance]

Story: *is supposed to be about creepy/bizarre/horror/paranormal things*

Me: 

Story: *is actually just about an inaccurate representation of a mentally ill person who is experiencing symptoms of mental illness, written by someone who obviously has never experienced those symptoms first hand and is just trying to be edgy* 

Me: 

[hechodeoro-deactivated20180924]

the real problem plaguing our society

[oddeyefrog-remade]

here is my updated contribution to the ending of vine, a compilation of my all time favorite vines

[pjo-deactivated20180501]

The best video ever posted on the internet is the scene from american psycho where they’re comparing business cards but someone edited it so they’re comparing like ridiculous forum signatures

[goodposter]

where i want to see this

[pjo-deactivated20180501]

[sitcomlesbian]

DANK ASS SPACE WEED

[ammnontet]

this is why aliens aint contact us yet cause they high as fuck

[trashnerdd-deactivated20171130]

i’m using rebecca’s cats again

[vickorano]

The most gentle meow.

[meloneko]

THE FIRST MEOW SOUNDS LIKE IT’S SAYING “HELLO” I’M DYING