when remus and sirius have a really bad argument, sirius tries to initiate something sexual because he can’t stand listening to remus yell at him. he asks remus to be rough, to take his anger out on him, and remus goes along with it at first because he’s still furious.
but halfway through, remus realizes sirius isn’t doing this because he wants sex. he’s doing it because he thinks he deserves to be punished.
so remus stops. he just lies down beside him and pulls him close, pressing soft kisses to his forehead and cheeks while sirius looks completely confused.
and remus tells him that arguments aren’t punishments. that people who love each other are allowed to be angry with each other. that fighting is supposed to help them understand each other better, not hurt each other.
because that’s what sirius learned growing up that conflict means pain, that love has to be earned back through suffering and remus wants him to know that with him, it never will