Hello all, unfortunately due to some issues with people I know finding this account in the past Iâm a bit too paranoid to be writing on this account again.
I have decided against deleting my work though, even if I find it a bit cringe in some of the older works lol. I donât believe in destroying art even if I think itâs bad, I know people still like to read itâ and I like to look back on this.
Iâll likely make another blog, but I wonât be sharing it here for personal safety reasons and general concerns about people I know finding it again. I know you guys might think the stuff on here is tameâ but theres some things best shared with strangers than people I know.
Iâd really like to write again, but I cannot get over my fear of being found again. Iâm a very sexually repressed person and felt best when I was just an anonymous person writing all this.
Anyway. Its been fun, I certainly tried to come back. but I cant, really. Sorry this seems very dramaticâ Iâm cringing while writing this actually lol, but I wanted to be fair and let you guys know whats up.
Itâs been real. Duces, and thank you for all your support. đâïž
i am :D i plan on writing more i promise. i might write about some of my other interests as well but i wanna apologize for being gone for like 4 months
hey sorry friends and fellas im back i got trapped in an old hyper fixation of mine (i still am a bit) and also life things happened but uhhh. im back to writing N smut LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOO
hallo lorbslorb !!!! are u okaye??? havnt seen u in a while đ„ș tge ant farm misses u đđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđ
IM ALIVE I PROMISE
im so sorry, life is more wack than ever as of right now and my writing steam has been at an absolute zero recently >_< but im not gone or anything! still have things i plan on releasing, ive just been recharging because iâve been a bit stressed about getting stuff out on here
kinda took an unannounced mental health break? i shouldnât be gone much longer or anything! might release some stuff on other interests of mine as well. anyway, im sorry i worried the ant farm T_T
I really enjoyed your Magnus archives stuff from last year, idk if youâre still down for that but I really appreciated you writing those
I miss writing TMA stuff! I honestly may go back to writing more TMA stuff Iâve just have major pokemon brainrot recently lol. Iâm still down to write for it!
hey gang!! totally okay to be serious every once in a while,, you should never apologize for setting boundaries! that shid is importand for you and us as well!đȘđȘ anyone that comes at u for this, i will bite (i have rabies)âŒïžâŒïžâŒïžrock on slorb lord đ
Hehe thank you! I feel awkward being serious on here because I like to appear more like some sort of strange cryptid on this little corner of the interwebs Iâve created, but it got to a point where I kinda avoided opening my ask box because it was just like âoh no theres another oneâŠâ and it felt like a 50/50 of either a normal request or a really triggering one. I really try my best not to judge, but I do wonder what ever gave the impression I was okay with those sort of things. When requesting triggering topics there should at least be a âhey, are you ok with this?â ask I feel! But maybe tumblr etiquette has changed over the past few years, I donât know.
Nonetheless, now that itâs out there and off my chest Iâm happy to say I havenât disappeared! I know I say that every time, but I do so because I feel like I post about once a month then go missing lol. Iâve been replaying a lot of pokemon games (surprise surprise) and trying to sort out young adult life. Iâm still writing, even if at a bit of a snails pace! I have a habit of bouncing thing to thing, so I kind of add onto fics in working on little bits at a time and hop to a different one when Iâm sick of looking at one. Itâs important to take a step back from your work so you can see how its coming out- and to make sure you donât rush to finish it just because youâre tired of it lol. Good things take time and stuff, you know how it is!
Thank you for your patience and stuff. Especially you Starry! It feels nice seeing your user pop up in my notifications, Iâm always happy to have you!
Hey guys more of a serious post. I guess its sort of my fault I didn't put up some rules for requesting but I've been getting a few triggering requests. I'm a queer person with some yucky sexual trauma, and this blog is a way to express my sexual feelings without feeling shamed or anything. I'm sure those of you requesting harsh stuff are a lot like me, but I just gotta say I can't take some of your requests due to my own feelings. I'll add to this when needed, if needed.
Please don't request sexual trauma / rape related things if they're in 'bad taste'. I wont write rape fanfics, or anything like that. I'm okay writing about characters who have experienced things like that in the past and how it affects their life now (its therapeutic for me lol), but I won't write rape scenes for sexual viewing. I'm okay writing slight dubious consent but only in the sense that both characters are drunk or whatever, that's my limit.
Please don't request underaged characters in sexual situations. I'm not okay with that at all. I wont write reader characters as underaged with an adult character either. I am okay writing fluffy things for younger characters but they will be strictly SFW.
Please don't request incestuous or pseudo-incestuous relationships. I'm not okay with doing this. I don't like familial language used in sex scenes if I can avoid it.
If you want a character to be trans in your request, please say that you want them to be trans rather than requesting "futa" or "cuntboy" characters. I am trans, and these words are a bit too fethishy for my liking. I know people are different, and if you reclaim / are comfortable with those words that's great! I would just rather not see them myself if I can avoid them.
I'm fairly vanilla myself, but I can write for some kinks. I don't know much about what I'm into, I'm still exploring that, but please know that any kink-related requests might go undone due to my personal discomfort. I may not do your request, and that's my right. I don't get paid to do these, you know.
All and all I don't wanna be a thorn in your guy's sides and make you read all this to feel bad or to discourage you from requesting, I just need to put up some boundaries because I've had about 4 or 5 requests that freaked me out. Thank you for understanding and all that stuff. Request away, but understand that I'm still a person behind this blog.
Hi, Iâm new to your page but I have a request so itâs an arven x reader, where the reader went to hisuni and when they came back, Arceus gave them the ability to travel through time, and they have Arceus ïżŒ symbol ïżŒlikes tattooed somewhere on their body ïżŒ you can also do it with multiple characters. Itâs just heâs my favorite. ïżŒ
Sincerely ïżŒ emo anon ïżŒđ€
AH!!!!!! Emo Anon i had a similar idea about that awhile ago!!!!!!!!!! I never wrote anything on it but now i get to AAA!!!!!!!!!! SAME BRAIN moment. I did change it a teeeeny bit, went for a scar-tattoo thingy rather than just a regular old tattoo. I also made it REALLY angsty because I am evil. Its a little short, i could do more with this idea if youâd like!
Warnings: Gender Neutral reader but mentions of being shirtless, mentions of scars, mention of trauma, self neglect (including not eating), angsty fluff, religious trauma (?) definitely religious themes
You were back. All was right in the world.
That isnât to say things were the same, however.
Arven could handle that. He could handle change if you were there with him. He had you back, and thats all he could truly ask for. Funny that the very god he prayed to return you was the one who took you away in the first place.
But Arven could hate god another time.
Heâd gotten used to bringing you food these days, he took it upon himself to make sure you were eating enough every day. Youâd grown far too used to neglecting your physical needs for his liking- you told stories of going days without basic necessities, and he couldnât stop himself from physically wincing at the thought. It made him sick, and he didnât care if that made him weak. He was used to making food for you before, but now it really felt like if he didnât feed you youâd only notice you were hungry when you were starving enough to be physically effected.
It wasnât your fault. It wasnât as if you were doing it on purpose. He knew that. He knew your body was still in survival mode. He wasnât upset with you, he wasnât sure he was even capable right now.
You and him always liked to sleep in each other dorms, always hanging out together just a little late and just saying âoh well, why go back to mine this late?â Always a silly excuse and both of you knew it. The only thing that changed was how forward you were.
> I canât sleep.
> I donât mean to bother. I just really donât think I can sleep alone right now. Could I sleep with you tonight? Iâm sorry if this is too much.
He remembered those text messages so well, them burnt so heavily into his memory. These days it goes generally unspoken when you stay the night, and if it was spoken it was in a quiet voice, a mumble, a whisper. It was as if you couldnât bare to be a burden in Arvenâs hands- but you would forever be anything but.
Even when he wakes up to you being awake, silently staring at the ceiling. He would never lie to you, it did scare him half to death some times. Other times heâd wake up to your shirtless form sitting up, turned away from him. You always slept shirtless, he never minded.
âThe little noises keep waking me upâ you always said, referring to the regular dorm ambience- people walking down the hall, the pipes in the walls, doors closing and opening.
âItâs hard to stay asleep.â youâd say, shooting him an apologetic look. He never minded. He couldnât find it in him to ever be upset with you like this. But it was the sight of your back that made his heart ache.
He had thought it was a tattoo at first really. And he wasnât silly to think so, having first saw it in dark lighting. It was in the mornings that the sun would shine through his blinds thatâd heâd see properly. Discolored scar tissue that contrasted from your regular skin tone as though you were branded, the scar tissue speckled with gold, bits and pieces of the gold appearing almost like lightning bolts in your veins. Itâd be so pretty if it didnât make him so damn mad.
There was no denying what happened to you. The symbol of Arceus etched into the flesh of your back, the veins attached to the tattoo like scar seeming to vaguely seep with that same discoloration. That discoloration shot out from the branding, running down your arms a bit andbfading as it went. In some parts is as though it makes patterns, but its so faint one couldnât truly see. Arven remembered the first time he ran his hand over it, feeling as your hand gently twitched under his fingertips.
Heâd ask if it hurt, and youâd always say no.
Heâd ask if it hurt then, and you swore you couldnât remember.
It didnât matter either way to him. It shouldnât have happened anyway, even if you didnt remember the pain. Making you forget isnât mercy- not doing it in the first place is.
What scared him most when you returned was the âgiftâ Arceus gave you. The one Arceus gave you with hardly any warning, with no guidance on how to harness it, nothing.
Youâd go missing for hours sometimes. At worst, a day or two. Sometimes he wouldnât notice due to his schoolwork, assuming you were just taking some alone time to do the same and work on yours. Sometimes he couldnât get you to pick up your phone the entire day and it scared him to death. It usually always ended the same.
The veins-like patterns in your skin he knew to be darkened in color glowing a soft golden color, your shaking form, the way you looked so exhausted and so terribly afraid.
âIt happened again.â
He grew to despise those words. It wasnât your fault, none of this was your fault. None of it. He hated the powers that forced these burdens upon you, and if that promised him some sort of eternal damnation he didnât care. Arceus may have let you live and brought you back to Arven, but if you asked him you shouldnât have been taken away in the first place. It always scared Arven so much when you disappeared. The burning fear of his own distaste for Arceus weighed heavy on him, he was afraid one day Arceus would hurt you to punish him- that one day itâd take you back and youâd never return. It made him feel sick. He knew he was powerless against a literal fucking god, but that didnât make the anger inside him die down any less. He couldnât switch it up now, and he had no desire to. He wasnât about to get on his knees and praise its name.
Youâd do it in your sleep, too. Arven had grown used to waking up to the sounds of wild pokemon, in tall grassy fields with no sign of civilization. All while you slept right beside him, unaware of whatâs occurred.
At one time it scared him. It scared him to death. But these days He wakes up to your peaceful form besides him, and even considering the circumstances he smiles. Its rare you get good sleep these days, so he doesnât usually dare to wake you. The way your chest rises and falls gently, the gentle golden glow of the scar-like tattoos on your skin, the way you softly stir in your sleep, mumbling things he canât quite make out.
The space-time distortion around the two of you isnât always like how you described them to be when you were trapped in the past. Flickering images of what the space around you looks like in different places in time- flashes of high tech buildings, then flashing to different terrain and a land vacant of people but full of pokemon. All within these small tears in the air that disappear almost as soon as they appear. It was like fireflies nobody was ever supposed to see. The air would buzz around the two of you, almost as though it was electrically charged. Reality sometimes was close to normal as Arven woke up in places he didnât recognize, other times it was a useless fight to try and understood all that he saw. Sometimes there was no âwhen and whereâ you went. Sometimes it was as though he woke up in limbo, your glowing form right next to him.
And yet he wasnât afraid. Not anymore. You were a being so full of secrets now, ones you didnât even know. The fear of the unknown gripped onto him for so long, but seeing you sleep so peacefully next to him in his patterned sweat pants and with those silly maschiff fuzzy socks Arven bought for you on your feet⊠he was content not knowing it all. He was content not entirely understanding.
This time was hardly like any other.
Arven had woken up to the buzzing of the air around him. The terrain looked surreal, warping in front of his eyes and at the ends of his vision. Sure, it made him a little uneasy. But he knew heâd be home soon anyway. Besides⊠in a way, it was kind of pretty.
You stirred awake, and the world around you slowly began to return to its regular shape as you came to⊠somewhat. Arven noticed the terrain seem to solidify around the edges, and his gaze turned to you. He laid down again, having been sitting up as he waited for you to awake on your own. You hummed, confused as to where you were.
âIt happened again.â Arven said. He would have hated hearing that, but⊠it felt better knowing that he was with you this time. Perhaps he didnât mind it happening if he could be there with you. You blinked over at your boyfriend, before wiggling your way closer to him. Sometimes you two warped without the blanket, and the gentle breeze and cool air was just enough to give you a little shiver. Arven chuckled softly, pulling you in. The grass quietly rustled around you a bit as the two of you got comfortable. Well⊠as comfortable as you could on hard ground. You laid half way atop him, he laid on his back as you used his chest as a pillow. One of his hands gently rubbed your back in a gentle, comforting motion. The two of you stayed like this for a moment as you fully woke up.
âIm sorryâŠâ you whispered, hiding your face in the crook of his neck. You couldnât help but feel embarrassed every time this happened, he wouldnât hear it though.
âHush, itâs fine. Youâre alright.â He said, his morning voice a tone deeper than usual. You could feel his chest slightly vibrate when he spoke. You sighed, pressing a few little kisses to his neck. He hummed in amusement at your antics.
âYou donât have to make up for it, you know.â Arven says. He knew you were trying to apologize in other ways and he just wouldnât have it. Though, he was a little tempted to let you continue⊠He certainly liked the little neck kissesâŠ
âIâll get us home.â You said softly as you gently held onto him. Arven hummed quietly in aggreance, only a tad disappointed that the kisses stopped there. Maybe when you were both home and well restedâŠ
This part of the process tended to tire you a lot. Focusing all your attention to your body, you did your best to clear your head.
Mapping yourself in your mind, mapping your body, the heart that beat in your chest, the lungs that expanded and contracted with every breath, the bones beneath your skin⊠and the boy beneath you. The gentle rise and fall of his chest as he breathed, the gentle beating of his heart, every little ridge and grove of his structure that youâve had the pleasure of seeing up closeâŠ
The terrain warped again as your thoughts devolved into nothing but the two of you. Colors swirled, the tears in time floating through the air like ash, even the ground beneath you seemed to wiggle and morph unnaturally. Any vision of rational reality was slipping away as the two of you entered the limbo state. It felt as though the electric air only got worse, the air almost stinging the skin of both of you.
Arven closed his eyes. It was overwhelming, it always was, and he couldnât let himself be afraid- it would only cause you to worry for him instead of getting you both home. He couldnât worry you. He focused on his breathing, focused on you. Opening his eyes for a second, he saw the scar on your back glow almost blindingly as you focused. He shut his eyes again. He couldnât let his heart race about it now- youâd hear it.
Within moments, it all seems to end. The world morphs around the two of you, feeling unnatural at first until you both recognize the feeling of the mattress beneath you.
Arven opened his eyes again, and alas, he was greeted with his ceiling. The corner of his vision swirl with color as he watches his room warp into its regular shape, until it finally settles.
When he hears you sigh against him and rest a bit more of your weight on him he chuckles, moving his hand from your back up to run through your hair.
âTadaaa.â You said unenthusiastically, your eyes beginning to flutter close again. Arven smiles at this, then craning his neck to press a kiss to your head as best he can given your pose.
âYou did good,â he praises softly. âGet some rest.â
As though you were waiting for his permission, you almost immediately passed out atop him. He didnât mind. Neither of you had class that morning, meaning you could just have a lazy day if you wanted. The first rays of the morning sun began to peak through Arvenâs blinds as chirps from several birds could be heard. He laid quietly, his mind wandering as he slowly began to doze off himself.
Despite every heart attack you gave him, despite every agonizing new step you had to take to return to some semblance of normal life, he still loved you more than anything. Arven made up his mind a long time ago about you, and he wasnât about to buckle under the literal interference of god or whatever curse god gave you. He wasnât going to let his fear of what he didnât understand chase him away from you. In a way, it honestly made him feel⊠more attracted to you some how. It wasnât that he found it attractive you suffered- not at all. It was just that⊠you were always so unique to him, and now thats even more true. This was a life you were sharing with him willingly, and he was more than happy to share it with you as well. He wasnât made to understand all of this, and honestly you werenât either- but you were forced to, and he wasnât going to let you deal with that burden alone.. He had no desire to find someone âsimplerâ. He wanted you. And heâd have you for as long as youâd let him. He hoped that meant forever.
MILORB IS BACK I REPEAT HES BACK RRAAAGHGGHHHH WE HUMBLY THANK YOU FOR ONCE AGAIN PROVIDING US A FEAST đđđđ
FEAST N FUCKERS!!!!!!!! GOB BLESS!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE SO WELCOME
Iâve been starting, stopping, starting and stopping fanfics CONSTANTLY recently i have SO many ideas its dumb. Prepare for more to feast upon my friends i am WORKIN đ«Ąđ«Ąđ«Ą
I meannnnnn, you DID say you wanted to write more N Smut so, I humbly request some N smut with your full creativity, go wild bro idk
YIPPIE i will >:) have N getting himself off and thinking about you while doing so hehehohouuhehheh
Reader is gender neutral, and also not Hilbert or Hilda
Warnings: Smut (whaaat no way), N thinks a little⊠obsessively (?) about the reader, its kinda short.
Nâs breathing was heavy as he tried his best to keep quiet. He really couldnât keep doing this. He felt so much shame and embarrassment, he hardly even knew what he was feeling.
He knew what this was. He just didnât understand why he couldnât push it away. He didnât understand these confusing thoughts and feelings that came with it.
Sex had a practical use, reproduction. Any and all creatures have a deep set instinct to reproduce one way or another, its how species survive. It make sense that even if N related to nothing else with humans, heâd still share the deep set instinct to reproduce. He understood that hormones would encourage reproduction, and he understood that that could be distracting at times. He understood this was all in his instincts, he understood it wasnât something he could just switch off- he understand his body demanded it while his rational mind knew better.
What he didnât understand is why only now at 18 did he just begin having this problem when he was perfectly fine before.
Nor did he understand why the thought of you kept crossing his mind and why that made it so, so much worse.
âThis must be what normal hormonal teenagers feel likeâ He thought to himself as he unbuttoned his pants.
It felt like a fire burned in his core. His skin was hot to the touch, his white over-shirt discarded and the bottom of his turtleneck pulled up. Heâd trail his hand down softly against his stomach, imagining it was your hands. Heâd turn his head away, too embarrassed to watch himself, too enveloped by his fantasies to break the illusion.
Heâd imagine that concerned look on your face- the one so full of genuine care that you give him sometimes. Heâd reassure you that he was okay with this, that he was okay with anything you did to him. In this state he swore you could kill him and N would probably still be okay, as long as it was you. Heâd imagine it was your hand pulling him out of his boxers, your hand slowly beginning to wrap around his cock, almost torturous with how gentle you were with him.
âPleaseâŠâ
N whimpered quietly to no one, a beg heâd give you for a little more. In his own mind youâd oblige, tightening your hold on him as you began to move.
And just like that, N felt the surge of fire in his veins as his poor, weeping cock was finally given attention it needed so badly.
He let out a choked sound of pleasure- a hushed one, he was so desperate to make sure no one heard him in his sleeping quarters. His lower abdomen was full of a searing heat, his pretty cock twitching in his own hand as he set a slow, gentle rhythm.
Heâd set that slow rhythm for youâd, imagining how youâd be hesitant⊠but he wasnât sure he could take it. He discarded his fantasy in place of a new one- a more direct one. He stopped his movement, and while that made him almost hurt inside he knew that heâd lose the plot soon anyway, it didnât matter.
Heâd imagine your cute, flustered face he pinned you beneath him. Would you⊠like that? Would you⊠want him on top of you? Heâd imagine the sounds youâd make, little gasps and heavy breaths as heâd push his cock deep into you. Heâd imagine how your cute noises youâd make as he set his pace, imagining you crying out. He felt himself shudder as he imagined your voice softly crying âmy kingâŠâ
Youâd never, he thought, it was unrealistic but it didnât matter when the thought sent what felt like electricity through his veins. God, how exciting the idea was of you calling him that- it would be as though youâd surrender to him, to admit he was royalty to you. He moved his other hand to cover his mouth, unable to trust himself not to cry out your name.
His other hand set a slow, steady pace. heâd want to be gentle with you- at first. He didnât want you to hurt, he didnât want to cause any discomfort, heâd just want you to feel good like he did. Heâd imagine your labored breathing as you got used to the feeling of him inside you. He wondered what itâd feel like for you, if itâd feel just as good for you as it would for him. He wondered what would be on your mind as heâd gently roll his hips into yours. He wondered if your internal dialogue would cry for more, he wondered if youâd be so affected by him that youâd have an internal dialogue at all- a decipherable one at that.
Just the thought of you being so affected by him and having such affection for him like he had for you made his cock twitch in his hand. He let out an audible shutter, the thought of you feeling the same way he did was something he could get off on in itself.
He wondered if you ever had nights like this, if you were ever so utterly overcome with need that you had to stop and take care of yourself. Oh, how he wished he could take care of you like that⊠youâd never allow him, the possibility was slim to none but that uncertainty left way for fantasy. Just for now.
He wondered if you ever thought of him like this. The thought felt even more scandalous to imagine than anything else, for some reason. He hoped you did think of him- even if you likely hated him. He stood for everything you didnât, it only made sense thereâd be some resentment- but still he hoped. He hoped you cried his name softly even when he couldnât hear it, he hoped he invaded your mind when you tried to get rid of your urges, he hoped he was the only thing you could think of to finally get it all out of your system.
âHow vain.â N thought to himself, but the shame didnât last long enough to matter as his hand picked up the pace.
He closed his eyes, his brows furrowing as his gut began to twist. The familiar coil was tightening, he could feel it. He whined softly into his other hand, tightening it over his mouth. No one could hear him like this, he couldnât allow it.
He wondered if you ever noticed the little things about him that he noticed about you. He always took note of your innocent mannerisms of course, but sometimes his eyes would fall to your hips and he couldnât help but imagine how good his hands would look on them as he held you still. He felt filthy for thinking in such a way, his mind never strayed to such perverse depths and yet when its you he sometimes couldnât help himself. He took note of your determination, your willingness to fight against him and what he stood for- and it was hot! Why did he find it so attractive? It was directly negatively affecting him and yet seeing the way you carry yourself with such passion and perseverance was so attractive! It earned more than just his respect, but his favor- and his affection. Sometimes his eyes fell onto your wrists, sometimes decorated with cute bracelets or sweat bands. When away from you heâd imaging how his own hands would look wrapped tightly around them, how youâd likely fight them even if you wanted him to hold you still. That sounded about right- if ever he had that chance with you he knew youâd likely try and keep him on his toes- even if it ended the same.
God he wished he could just have you for one night. He didnât care if you hated what he stood for, just one night between the two of you spent as normal people. One night you could forget he was the King of Team Plasma, one night he could forget that you were a vigilante looking to take his team down- just one night as equals, true equals.
One night of absolute, pure eros. One night of N losing his manners, of him showing you he could be more than just a gentleman. One night of him growling obscene praises to you as he hilted himself in you, of him running his hands along every single inch of you and memorizing the feeling of the goosebumps rising on your skin beneath them. One night to cry your name like a mantra as he loses himself in you, to fuck you like an animal till the only thing you can do is cry his name out all the same.
One night to show you he was human too, just like you.
But you knew already, didnât you?
Thats why you kept coming back.
N yelped louder than he would have liked as he came, shooting ropes onto his black turtleneck as he stroked himself through his climax, not caring just yet about the mess he was making. He shuddered, absolutely dizzy with pleasure as he fucked into his hand before finally falling almost limp against the bed. He moved the hand from his mouth, letting out a frustrated but relieved sigh. He grimaced when he looked down at the mess he made on his turtleneck, his hand being absolutely covered with his spent. He let out a displeased grumble, throwing his head back onto his pillow and just taking a second to breathe.
He wanted to cry, honestly. He was so unbelievably sexually frustrated, and his fixation just had to be on someone he couldnât have. So he was forced to spend every other night with his left hand as he imagined yours, feeling nothing but shame the next time heâd look at you.
Of course, he didnât know that you felt the same shame he did when his eyes met yours.
His first mistake was believing you werenât as needy as he was.
