Hanging out with Guzma
Wanted to do something chill with Guzma <3
TW: Gender neutral reader, Guzma has a potty mouth das it I think
After severing ties with the Aether Foundation, Guzma hasn't had the money or resources to treat you to “traditional” dates, like fancy dinners, movies, museums etc. So most of your “dates” are you two just going on walks around the city after work. You tell him he doesn't have to follow you around while you shop but he just tells you not to worry about it, he's already on his way.
And there he was, waiting outside your building. He grinned when he saw you and made a big show of greeting you; lifting you up in a bewear hug, feet dangling and placing you down to plant fat kisses all over you.
“Hey there, gorgeous.” He says after kissing you.
You giggle and try to shoo him off. “Guuuuuz, someone at work might seeeee.”
“Think I give a shit, babe?” He spoke between kisses. “If they got a problem wit me lovin on my baby, they gotta answer to the Big Bad.”
He continued his onslaught until he was satisfied, then he threw his arm around your shoulder and began to walk to the park together. “How was your day?”
“Meh, it was OK. You find out very quickly that many adults don't mature past high school.”
“Damn.”
“Yeah. Y'know how the one kid in a group project didn't do any work so they just offer to present and then get all the credit?”
“Like those bitchy popular kids?”
“Exactly. Those kids grow up to become managers.”
Guzma groans. “Snobby ass kids getting jobs handed to em, fuckin pisses me off.”
“Right? And I know damn well I’m not getting promoted, it's gonna be some inexperienced cousin or friend of theirs.”
“Well shit, if they're looking for no experience, sign me the fuck up.”
You laughed. “If I could get you a job in my building, I would. Have a little cubicle right next to mine, like little work neighbors.”
“And wear a stuffy ass collar and tie all day. Dream come true.”
“I think you'd look handsome!”
“I always look handsome.”
You laughed. “That's true.”
You two walk in circles for a bit around the park for a bit, just chatting, until you decide to grab a snack at your favorite little grocery store. This store has a lot of Pokemon themed merch and snacks so you like to grab a trinket or two whenever you visit.
You were busy filling your basket with junk food; instant ramen, cookies, gummies, the works. Guzma kept wandering away and throwing more garbage in the basket, stuff you knew he wouldn't finish.
“You don't even like cheese puffs.”
“Yeah but they’re shaped like masquerain wings.”
This continued with energy drinks, spicy nacho chips, frozen dumplings.
But every now and then he’d come back with a trinket he thought you’d like.
“Babe, look, this is you.”
You turned around to see him holding a shirt with a sleeping snorlax on it that said “nope, not today.”
You gave him a blank stare but he just laughed and pointed at you. “See?? That's how snorlax looks!”
When you were in line to check out, Guzma said he forgot to grab the giant parasect gummy and asked you to get it for him.
“There’s no way you can finish that thing.”
“It’s just the mushroom that’s edible, and I can if you help me.”
“I am not eating that.”
“Then I’ll share with the Grunts.”
You snorted but went to grab his atrocious snack anyway.
Guzma paid for your haul, then left to walk around the mall for a bit. He asked you to pass him a drink from the bag you were holding, but when you reached inside, you felt something soft. You pulled it out to find a plush of your favorite Pokemon.
“Guzma!”
“Huh. How’d that get in there?” He asked, smirking.
You giggled, hugging the plush to your chest and kissing Guzma on the cheek. He grinned and threw his arm around you again.
You munched on your snacks while you walked through the mall, chatting and window shopping. Most of your time was spent in a video game store, looking at merch and bins of used games.
Guzma saw you looking at a case of old consoles. “Used to have a Wii U.”
“I did too! What was your favorite game?” “Lego City.”
“That’s dope, the Lego games were awesome. Used to have a few of em on the Wii. I was a huge brat, though, could never play fairly with other people.”
Guzma scoffed. “And here I was about to get a copy. Never mind since apparently you don’t play nice.”
“Hey, I’m grown now! I’ve matured!”
“Don’t know about that, babe, haven’t seen someone laugh so hard at a good dick joke like you.”
“I’ll have you know, I have a refined palette for dick jokes, only the finest of phallus humor will amuse me.”
You left without buying anything, but Guzma made a mental note that you liked Lego games, too. After a while, you were getting sleepy so you two decided to catch the bus back home.
The bus is empty when you get on, just you and him chatting under the fluorescent lights with his arm around your shoulder until you're nodding off. Guzma pulls you closer until you're resting against him and he starts stroking your cheek with his thumb.
“Nuuu, Guz, I can’t fall asleep on the bus, s’not safe.”
He chuckles at your voice already slurred from sleepiness. “I’ll protect us, babe, it’s OK.”
You tried to keep your eyes open, but Guzma was so warm and the circles he was tracing on your face were so soothing. Next thing you knew, you were woken up by Guzma gently nudging you.
“Next stop is ours, babe.”
You looked around and stretched. “Damn. I didn’t even realize I fell asleep.”
Guzma chuckled. “I know, you were out like a light.”
“It’s your fault with your stupid comfy body.”
“Damn, you wound me, baby. Would a bed be better?”
“Yes, much, but I still demand using you as a pillow.”
“At your service.”
You got off the bus and walked home.
