Attempting to GM @gmdisaster - Tumblr Blog

inspired by the scariest words my dm has ever said to me and the subsequent coolest (AND SCARIEST) scene of my life

im so glad that this post in particular kinda blew up, if really just for the look on that same dm's face when i showed him that the funnie little meme i made about his brilliant terrifying line now has 1800 notes on tumblr. i actually treasure that honestly. it was a fantastic look on his face

mossworm

that bonus thing you get if you play as a dark elf

cnc-pet

My favorite thing about 5e is how prices are seemingly selected at random. For example 3 silver pieces can fetch you one chunk of meat or… 15 chickens

cnc-pet

One (1) book costs the equivalent of 1,250 chickens

cnc-pet

You wanna cast revivify? That’s gonna cost you 15,000 chickens babey

cnc-pet

My bf suggested making “chickens” the currency of the homebrew setting I’m working on and honestly that would be so fucking funny even if I have no idea how that would work

cnc-pet

It’s specifically a pirate setting too, so just like seeing wanted posters for dangerous pirates and it’s like “wanted: dead or alive, 20,000 chickens”

hellenhighwater

We're doing a White Elephant dice exchange in one of my d&d campaigns and I'm wrapping the tiniest dice for it

hellenhighwater

In the hopes of these tiny dice not being lost the first time they get rolled, I have also made a tiny dice tower out of scrap cardboard. It's three inches tall.

hellenhighwater

Oooh the package fits into the dice tower!!

hellenhighwater

My party members were not actually that enthused by the tiny dice and tower, so I guess that this is for you, the internet.

rollingtablesiguess

Rolls to Alarm Your Players

Want to spice the game up? Why not try alarming your players for no real reason? Make sure to make a show out of counting the dice before you roll.

sandersstudies

If somebody pitched me traditional gender roles for the first time they would have me in the first half not going to lie.

Oh, in a complex society with a massive amount of required knowledge and responsibilities, two people traditionally partner together so that the knowledge and responsibilities can be divided between them? Awesome!

Wait what do you mean the responsibilities are assigned at birth.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN ONE HALF HAS FEWER CIVIL RIGHTS.

sandersstudies

If gender wasn’t assigned at birth this shit could be like picking a DnD class but nooooooooo.

sandersstudies

“Idk dude the spell Create Life just seems so OP for an entire class.”

“But it’s nerfed by the fact that your gold only counts for 0.7 the amount!”

*slaps nonbinary down on the table* “guys check out my new homebrew.”

randomtable

“Do I Know Someone Who Can Help Us With ____?” (2d6)

2. No; the person you thought could help refuses and adds another complication to the situation. (Example complications: they demand payment for a past debt, they are with someone you wanted to avoid, or they call the authorities regarding your illegal activities.) 3. The person you know who could help has gone missing, you’d have to find them first. 4. Yes, but they demand a steeper price than you would expect. Furthermore, if you refuse they will be offended. 5. Yes, but things are awkward between you. The price they ask will be generous, but only after an uncomfortable conversation. 6. Yes, but the help they can offer is sub-par, or only half of what you need. 7. Yes, but they need you to do a small favor for them right now before they help you. 8. Yes, but you’ll owe them one. Could be a future favor they call on, or a cut of whatever money you’re after, or something else. 9. Yes; they’ll give you a good price but it’s not free. 10. Yes, but they don’t seem too happy about it - you’ll have to look for help somewhere else next time. 11. Yes, there’s someone who owes you one and you can cash in that favor. 12. Yes, and that person also gives you an unrelated piece of helpful information.

thewitchqifrey

Edgin whacking people with his lute

merulanoir

His official fucking statblock:

corruptedeclipse

Another best seller of ours, the Warlock bag! @noirandchocolate designed this bag where the cables wrap and twist around these bigger like ‘beads’ in the design, to mimic the sticker design of all the Venus flytraps wrapped around the charm. The gradient from red to black varies from bag to bag too, so each one is special! And as usual, this bag is roomy and stretchy so it can hold a LOT of dice, or anything else you wanna cram in there!

The bags are here!

The stickers are here!

tilthedayidice

🌳 Q-Workshop Green Forest 🌳

Find them here on the Awesome Dice site!!

dndsettingsinfo

angry-cryptid

And the last one for today! This one is a 40mm d20 (which you could but should absolutely not use to seriously injure someone if you throw hard enough). It has a whole pinecone inside!!

You can get it here