Conservative Calvinists like to argue against the notion of choosing God—they say that grace is irresistible, and that the conclusion of this is that we do not choose or accept God, he breaks into us and forcibly transforms us. I think of this and the sex abuse scandals of the SBC, the patriarchal domination, the marital rape, the lack of care for consent—their God reflects a worldview that does not value consent. God rushes in as he pleases and cares not for our response. They argue this is the pious belief—that anything else suggests we are capable of stopping God, and this diminishes his power, but they’re missing something.
What if God wants our permission?
What if God, the lover, wants us to choose him?
Choice and free will aren’t about power, though of course conservative Reformed Baptists and the like would reduce them to that because to them, everything is about power. But really, choice and free will are about love freely given. About saying yes to God. Our Lady consented before the Incarnation. The prophets consent to delivering God’s message. Jesus consents to the Cross. The Holy Spirit is invited in. It doesn’t diminish God’s power for him to want us to consent. It adds to his grace and his love. And he is a patient lover—one who waits for us when we reject him. Who does not move until we say be it done to me according to thy word. The bridegroom who waits for the bride to come to him.
We choose God—we seek out and choose his embrace, which is always available for us but does not force itself upon us.
It’s not about our ability to stop God—it’s about a God who waits for us to choose and consent to him. To ask for him. God is a good lover, who values these things, who treasures them.
I am my beloved’s and he is mine. And I have chosen this life, just as he has chosen me.