goretrip @goreanon - Tumblr Blog

I have not posted nor reblogged something in near 2 years lmao.

I’m back ig

Can I have a cursed giant creature fact?

sure! at lengths of over 55 feet and weights of 600 pounds, our friend the Oarfish surely qualifies :)

we don’t know a whole lot about the world’s longest bony fish, aside from that it rarely comes to the surface and inspired most of the Sea Serpent legends floating around. they’re fairly rare and live only in the Abyssopelagic Zone, around 3,300 feet down. but this is old news to everyone who’s seen the info posts about these guys going around, so what’s so cursed about this? well, I’ll tell you!

have you ever wondered what the Oarfish gets up to, way down there? we didn’t realize this until we started sending ROVs and submarines into the deep sea to observe live ones, but Oarfish are… a little nontraditional as fish go.

see, they don’t normally swim horizontally all majestic-like like in the pictures up there, it turns out that instead they spend their time just kind of… hanging vertically in the water column.

motionless, staring at the surface with all 50+ feet of them vanishing into the darkness below.

and I don’t know about you but frankly, I find that a little creepy.

bunjywunjy

though sometimes they do come over to say hi, and that’s ok.

bunjywunjy

just imagine though you’re an oil rig diver minding your own business when this THING slides up soundlessly from the depths like it’s on an invisible elevator and makes kissy faces at you for the next five minutes:

gallusrostromegalus

The caps of the guy tied to the chain and staring at the oarfish are from River Monsters with Jeremy Wade. he’s attatched to the chain becuase the current is insanely strong there, and he spends the entire time the oarfish decide to hang out with him practically shrieking with delight and excitment over seeing this ridiculous animal.

pangur-and-grim

i wish i was hanging vertically in a water column

miaoutea

popee makes me feel so alive

ruinedchildhood

grey-wardens-archive-deactivate

BON APPÉTIT Brad and Orville Peck Make Elote (Mexican Street Corn) - It’s Alive

culopeludo

clearspit

fisting thats the tea i like to see

nocturneno11-deactivated2023122

kairisparda

She knew she fucking knew, I love her

byjove

what city slickers don’t understand is that weird noises always come from the forest and we just ignore it

byjove

if you go out to investigate and get got then that is on you, ignore it and go back to sleep like a rational person

urbanfantasyinspiration

Me, on the porch: chillin

Woods: WoooooooooEEEEEEEEEEEG

Me:

anarchetypalarchive

i saw this post earlier about therapists and it reminded me of my old therapist paul, who in my opinion is one of the greatest men alive and who did not put up with my bullshit for even one second

anyway i go in to see paul one week in the summer of 2016, and i’m doing my usual bullshit which consists of me talking shit about myself, and paul is staring at me, and then he cuts me off and says that he’s got a new tool for helping people recognize when they’re using negative language, and gets up and goes over to his desk

and i’m like alright hit me with that sweet sweet self-help article my man, because i’m a linguistic learner and whenever paul’s like here i have a tool for you to use it’s pretty much always an article or a book or something

paul opens a drawer, takes something out, and turns back around. i stare.

i say, paul.

is that a nerf gun.

yeah, says paul.

i say, are you gonna shoot me with a nerf gun in this professional setting.

he happily informs me that that’s really up to me, isn’t it. and sits back down. and gestures, like, go ahead, what were you saying?

and i squint suspiciously and start back up about how i’m having too much anxiety to leave the house to run errands, like it was a miracle to even get here, like i’ve forgone getting groceries for the past week and that’s so stupid, what a stupid issue, i’m an idiot, how could i–

a foam dart hits me in the leg.

i go, hey! because my therapist just shot me in the leg. paul blinks at me placidly and raises an eyebrow. i squint again.

i say, slowly, it’s– not a stupid issue, i’m not stupid, but it’s frustrating me and i don’t want it to be a problem i’m having.

no dart this time. okay. sweet.

so the rest of the hour passes with me intermittently getting nailed with tiny foam darts and then swearing and then fixing my language and, wouldn’t you know it, i start liking myself a little more by the end of the session, which is mildly infuriating because paul can tell and he’s very smug about it

anyway i leave his office and the lady having the next appointment walks in and i hear what’s all over the floor? and paul very seriously says cognitive behavioral therapy tools.