[greatcomputerearthquake]

Using this instead of a DNI

[silvermoon424]

Fun fact! one of Strelka's puppies was named Pushinka and given to JFK as a gift to help ease Cold War tensions. Pushinka later had puppies of her own and her descendants are still living as of 2024.

[pikaole]

Sea slug embroidered bracelet for secret shop ( ~ until August 7th)

[pikaole]

Me and mom learned new English word.

[pikaole]

Wow…This is probably the most famous posts on my Tumblr lol. 

This is what I drew after this situation 👇

[possumcollege]

[lopkelepke]

[lesvegas]

passing in public makes me feel like white shrek

[lesvegas]

literally how it feels

[galacticsabc]

Go! Rocky, Go!

[andthepeople]

rocky finding out about Rare leaking events because grace gets a nose bleed and then he's like i didn't know That was supposed to come out of There and grace says well it's not really Supposed to but sometimes it does. and rocky's like. where does it end. when does it ever stop. the fluids can just come out of anywhere???? any hole????? and grace explains well not any hole and also you can sort of tell how bad things are by the color sometimes??? which is horrifying because rocky can't SEE color. and then every time they're getting freaky with it and grace has an orgasm rocky has to stop and check the viscosity by vibrating it between his fingers and be like what color is it. be specific. is it red. is it green question. and grace is like. this is the worst pillow talk in the whole entire universe and i can actually say that as a qualified expert. and rocky says expert. be serious. two humans and one eridian does not make you an expert. so grace just has to be like. my semen is white.

[absolutejamer]

got hit by a fucking train halfway through this

[gondorrevealparty]

Having a favorite animal is awesome because friends who you haven't been in touch with can send you a picture of that animal and boom, now they're in touch with you

[syzygynephile]

Me, trying to impress my date with a display of my boundless humility: I would like to order one single, solitary crumb.

Waitress taking my order: Such arrogance! Not only do you presume to boast under the guise of being humble, but your order employs the most decadent of linguistic excesses - the tautology!

My date, who until recently thought "tautology" referred to the study of tensile strengths and upon learning her mistake compensated by reading through its Wikipedia article: That would be more correctly identified as a "pleonasm".

The editor I hired to curate my posts who styles himself as a sort of scheming court advisor: My liege, this one is getting away from us. The punchline loses much of its impact when the rest of the joke is derailed by this increasingly self-indulgent meta humour. Were it up to me, your Grace, which of course it is not, I would cut the others and leave myself as the only supporting character. You need noone else, Your Majesty...

My card: Declines

[kitty-c4t]

[budugu]

[agnosticblowjob]

[sofuton]

[sentient-tent]

This is Tie, she is going to eat all of the notes

[sentient-tent]

reblog to feed her notes

[elodieunderglass]

How is she doing this

[elodieunderglass]

Oh well none of my business

[proudtoehaver]

“I was on a strict diet during Episode VIII, and she was like, ‘Kid, get into that fridge and take some chocolate bars. I have many there.’ And I did,” he recalls. “I failed my diet because Carrie Fisher told me to. And it [felt] great.”

-John Boyega on Carrie Fisher

[fuocogo]

This is the Carrie Fisher post of body positivity reblog for a chocolate bar from her fridge

[greelin]

my dark twisted secret is i always use my turn signals whenever possible because i believe they were included in vehicles for a reason. i’m a bit of a freak this way. a weirdo

[plaguedocboi]

One of my coworkers owns this shirt and wears it to work almost every Saturday and I can’t stay silent about it any longer

[10001gecs]

imagining someone hatching clownfish in this tshirt and absolutely losing my shit

[o-craven-canto]

Alternate timeline in which all Greek and Latin roots are swapped:

catastrophe -> contraverse cephalopod -> capitoped chlorophyll -> viridofolia democracy -> populimpery homicide -> anthropoctony homosexual -> equigamic kilometer -> millimensure interregnum -> mesarchy magnanimous -> megapsychic manuscript -> chirography motorcycle -> ergatorote microscope -> parvovisor oxygen -> acidofex polyamory -> multierasty television -> remotoscopy universe -> monostrophe