worмтaιl

[keiynanlonsdalesource]

Keiynan Lonsdale attends the 2018 MTV Movie And TV Awards at Barker Hangar on June 16, 2018 in Santa Monica, California.

[grettipcw]

DEAR PEN PAL,

@grettipcw

i don’t know why i’ve chosen today of all days to sit down and write this, i’d envisioned a lighter subject to break the ice with a stranger but TODAY of all days, i feel like i can’t 𝒷𝓇𝑒𝒶𝓉𝒽𝑒. and while i’ve got people to turn to, i truly do, i cannot imagine casting this burden onto anyone else. i couldn’t do that to someone, like they have to me. it’s the beauty of this assignment, is it not? ANONYMITY. that way i feel no shame in revealing the things that have plagued my thoughts since the term started, because you don’t 𝓚𝓝𝓞𝓦 me. though it might be just as easy to argue not even my closest friends know what it is that really lives behind the facade i’ve been taught to keep up.  that’s what this is all about, really. the rehearsed PART in a stupid charade i was born into, that i’m expected to upkeep. let me paint the picture for you very quickly. the cookie cutter family, you’d never expect anything wrong to happen to them. they’ve got their shit together, right? against all odds. WRONG. they’re just as broken as anyone, more so even. they’ve crafted a pretty lie for everyone to buy and it’s snowballed to the point where even they are racing to patch up the cracks around the edges. and i’m at the core of the entire ordeal, aching to scream until it all just stops. but it won’t.  so how do you move forward when everything you already know to be a lie becomes impossibly more vapid, empty, senseless? when the one thing you considered sacred, the LOVE you swore could outlive the untimely circumstances surrounding it finally crumbles? i suck at metaphors. my real question, i suppose, is how do i continue to act like nothing is wrong, smile my way through life while my parents continue to play the part of a happily married couple, after it was been revealed to me that they are decidedly NOT together? it’s a good thing prying eyes can’t see into our estate where they’ve graciously turned the master wing into a living quarters for two single people with a dungeon full of secrets.  it might not seem like much, dearest stranger. perhaps i have a knack for exaggerating things. but i feel like i have no control over anything that happens with the people i love, about as much control as i have over myself. and i want to take it all back, i NEED to take that control. for my own sanity, or what’s left of it. because, if there was anything to love before, what could be left now that the last part of my core beliefs has been ripped away? what shell of a person am i now?                                  yours in passing,

                                                         𝓜𝓸𝓻𝓲𝓪𝓻𝓽𝔂

ｄｅａｒ   ｍｏｒｉａｒｔｙ,

you’re right, i don’t know you, my new friend. which is what you are, as you’ve spilled some pretty deep stuff here. look at all this that i get to unpack in the first letter !  betrayal ! intrigue !  heartbreak !  i don’t think anyone’s ever handed over so many secrets so quickly.  don’t worry, it’s a  nice  thing to feel trusted.   maybe a little overwhelming.  i don’t know that you’ll want my advice. it’s not very good, let’s just get that out of the way. i was a little worried this would happen, you see. I was worried i’d get matched with some upset boy or girl who’d seek out my help. not because i don’t think you have reason to be frustrated, but because i wouldn’t know what to say.  i hope i don’t disappoint you.  so just be clear that my understanding and wisdom is limited.  very   limited. 

 but from everything you’ve said, i  DO  know, i don’t want you to feel sad or  alone.  you don’t deserve it. as much as that is worth to you coming from a complete stranger and fellow disappointment to our ‘great’ and ‘all-knowing’ parents.  (spoiler alert: adults are morons, just as capable as fucking up as the rest of us) 

I think, my new friend, that your problem might be in expectations. your parents unfair expectations on you,  and   your expectations of what a family is supposed to be. are you upset because you feel like you’re family has lost some image ?  are you upset because you feel like you were lied to ?  i suppose i don’t understand when you question how you’ll smile and move forward like nothing has happened  ?    i think a far better question to ask yourself, rather than how can i keep up the charade, is to ask yourself,    why would you ?   why would you do that ? because they told you to ?  or that’s what you think they want ?  why would you keep together this ‘perfect’  world for them, when it doesn’t make you happy ?   

 the scary, but also brilliant thing, is when you stop asking what you can do for them and start thinking about what you can do for yourself, is now you’re free to make your own choices.  your parent’s are just like you, you know, they make mistakes and such. big ones. little ones. they’re your parents, yes.  but they’re also human.  you  DON’T  have to listen to them forever. so get that nonsense out of your head right now.  of course, there’s a lot of choices out there that they were trying to protect you from. a lot of different things in the wide world that could possibly make you happy.  or absolutely    miserable.  i don’t envy you having to  pick  something.  that’s some pressure. but isn’t that some of that   control   that you said you wanted back ?  don’t you want to trust that you’ll make good decisions that’ll make you happier than you are now ? i think you’re capable. i really do.

now i should mention, if it’s true that you don’t feel like even your friends know who you are, i feel truly sorry for you. there’s a remedy for it though. be a little selfish. do things for yourself, rather than what you think will make  other people happy.  you’ve really just been doing it wrong, worrying about other people’s feelings !  

no really,  stop.  i know that’s not what they tell you to do.  you’re supposed to be selfless and giving to be a good person. oh, and make sure you do it  all the time.  well,  that’s garbage.   of course you should be nice, but not at the   expense   of yourself.  if they don’t like your choices, despite them making you happy ? then you don’t want friends like that anyway. so don’t be afraid to take care of yourself, friend. there’s no way you can lose. i’m giving you permission do your best, ignore what everyone else wants and just pick  moriarty  first. okay ?

you’ll never find a better advocate for your own happiness than yourself. no one else is capable of giving it to you. 

----except maybe me. genius advice-giver that i am.

             your very own concerned stranger,

                                                         ｈｏｌｍｅｓ

[midsommars-deactivated20201109]

[grettipcw]

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹   mᎪᏒᏞᎬᏁᎬ  ⊹

she knew no one could quite grasp how to make her smile like PETER could. there was something about the good natured boy that always coaxed a genuine smile onto her lips despite whatever nonsense was transpiring in her personal life, which only proved that it was the correct choice to seek his council. what she loved most about him was that no matter what, he always MEANT well, despite the outcome and quite frankly, he was the sort of friend that would make you think the consequences were worth the risk.  ❛ oh? alright, what do you have in mind then? what trick will you impress me with this time.  ❜ the blonde laughed softly as she leaned forward, excitement lighting up her hazel orbs.  ❛ lead the way pete, i’m right behind you.  ❜

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹  ᏢᎬᏆᎬᏒ  ⊹

peter bounced from his seat, his head bobbing with an ill-disguised impatience as she moved to join him. he carried the sort of adoration for marlene that was hard to hide, his feelings an accumulation of childhood memories and the reluctant yet wholehearted acceptance of family that a person had a chance to   choose.  there was little wrong she could do.   ❛  impress ?  well shit, marls. you know i don’t work well under pressure. you’ve jinxed the whole thing.   ❜   his shoulder bumped her’s, a quick study of her features searching for traces of happiness, although he would gladly accept amusement.  if there was one thing he failed at ( there were several things ) but his greatest offense would always be reliance. peter “reliably unreliable” pettigrew.  of course,  that wasn’t for lack of   trying.  he draped his arm over her shoulder, his other wrist moving in a grand gesture to better draw her into the disillusionment with him. as for their destination,  it was too early, they still had classes to attend until they were allowed to leave, but that’s what secret tunnels were for.   ❛   the chocolate frogs are singing my name. not your’s though. so don’t get any smart ideas, mckinnon. the frogs are mine.   ❜   rather than turn for the front door, peter nodded his head up the stairs as encouragement for marlene to continue to follow.

[grettipcw]

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹  mᎪᏒᎽ  ⊹

                    whelp    .     he  wasn’t  wrong     .    ❛    c’est  la  vie    ,    ❜     she  mumbled  with  a  hand  wave      ,     a  thin  line  briefly  curling  into  a  smirk  as  she  took  a  quick  survey  of  the  room    .    everyone  looked  miserable     ,     some  even  burrowing  in  their  arms  in  a  not-so-subtle  attempt  at  falling  asleep  on  their  desk     .     she  might’ve  tried  the  same  thing  had  she  not  been  hyped  up  on  sleeping  pills  the  night before    .     for  the  first time  in  ages    ,    mary  wasn’t  tired     .     ❛    beautiful     .     brilliant    .     take  your  pick    .   personally    ,    i  think          ❜     she  stopped  midsentence  as  she  followed  his  gaze     ,    heat  surfacing  in  her  cheeks  as  she  placed  her  forearms  over  the  cover   ,    leaning  over  it  as  if  the  book  would  escape  if  given  some  air     .      ❛    i  like  mystery  novels   .    keeps  me  guessing    .    ❜    the  real  mystery  was  whether  anastasia  would  pick  elias  or  jacob           both  interesting  enough    ,    but  mary  was  already  a  little  in  love  with  jacob   .    he  had  a  way  with  words    .    and  he  was  blond     ;    mary  always  had  a  thing  for  blonds      .      ❛    it’s  an  obscure  author    ,    you’ve  probably  never  heard  about  it    .    ❜  

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹  ᏢᎬᏆᎬᏒ  ⊹

  ❛  mystery ?  ❜   and it would’ve continued to be, had peter not taken note of the flush creeping over her cheeks, like watercolors spreading over unmarked canvas. bemusement cracking the line of his lips at these first small indications of shame, his smile filled with delight at the emotion. as much as his pursuit of other’s mild discomfort might’ve gotten him in trouble in the past, embarrassment usually revealed something about a person. a clear window into their thoughts and view of themselves, that for whatever reason, they wanted to hide. there was nothing malicious in the jump in curiosity, only a caterwauling in his head, a screeching that goaded him into all his absolute worst ideas.  the strength of it had him leaning closer to see around the makeshift barrier.   ❛  i resent the insinuation ,   mary.  i’ll have you know, i don’t know any authors.  ❜   a typical proud exaggeration on his part, he wasn’t stupid, only limited in wanting to view the world through a thick veil of fun. peter gave her elbow a gentle prod, his interest piqued at the chance to see a little inside mary macdonald’s head. his words were teasing     ❛  come on, what’re you getting shy for  ?  lemme see.  ❜   

[m0chibee]

Visit Original Link

[integrahellsings]

[jeffreycombs]

[grettipcw]

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹  mᎪᏒᎽ  ⊹

                      hand  to  god     ,     mary  macdonald  had  no  idea  why  she  was  so  annoyed      .     she  was  in  detention    ,    yes     ,     but  it  wasn’t  like  she  was  missing  out  on  anything     .     she  had  no  friends  to  hang  out  with      ,     no  sports  to  practice  or  games  to  play     .     the  witch  would  be  doing  in  her  common  room  what  she  was  doing  in  the  classroom       ;       brooding  with  a  teenaged  romance  novel  glued  to  her  fingers     (     the  paper  cover  removed  to  reveal  nothing  but  black  casing     ,     so  no  one  would  be  able  to  guess  what  she’d  been  reading     )      .     so  when  peter  showed  up     ,     she  didn’t  feel  the  need  to  yell          but  her  default  scowl  remained     .      ❛     got  caught  with  my  hand  in  the  cookie  jar      ,      ❜     she  shot  him  a  glance     ,    brow  arched  as  her  expression  filled  in  the  blanks     .      ❛     don’t  you  skip  your  detentions     ,     peter      ?     or  am  i  just  lucky     ?      ❜            

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹  ᏢᎬᏆᎬᏒ  ⊹

  ❝  you’re not supposed to  stick around   a crime scene.  very stupid of you.  get in and get out, as they say  ❞    he offered his advice with a chuckle and observation of her sour expression, any sympathy from the boy mysteriously lacking.  his palms beat out a quick rhythm against the desk as he glanced over the fellow occupants, brushing away her annoyance as though it did not exist.    ❝  only some. there’s a weird paradox, where if you miss detention, all they can do is give you more. there’s very few lessons to learn in that, mary. and i think that’s beautiful.   ❞     his cheek collapsed against his hand, the lazy bend in his neck held up by a gangling elbow as he openly studied her and her odd choice in literature.   

[grettipcw]

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹  mᎾᎾᏁᎽ ⊹

                    he  might  as  well  have    ;   guilt  was  a  far  greater  weapon  to  use  against  the  werewolf            he  was  too  stupid  and  stubborn  to  belittle  his  pride  for  anything  other  than  something  emotional     .    a  wand  to  the  head     ?     nah   .   a  fist  to  the  face     ?     go  fuck  yourself    .    but  a  pout  from  one  of  his  oldest  friends      ?     well  shit    ,     lemme  grab  my  shoes    .     remus  was  dragged  from  his  lovesick  stupor  and  he  really  didn’t  appreciate  it     ,    especially  since  he  was  in  the  middle  of  writing  her  a  very  tasteful  poem    .     he  just  needed  something  better  than  rhyming  MARGOT  with  the  CARGO  in  her  trunk    (    wink    ,    wink    )     .     ❛     hmph     ?    ❜      he  grunted     ,     as  if  he’d  just  woken  from  a  nap     .      ❛     oh    .    ❜     he  reached  for  his  pockets     ,    pulling  out  his  lock-picking  kit  before  taking  a  knee    .    

                     they  had  been  exploring  long  enough  to  know  that  many  of  the  doors  had  extra  charms     ,     a  little  safety  alarm  for  professors  to  know  when  someone  had  been  out  after  hours      .      after  several  detentions     ,     the  boys  came  to  understand  that  sometimes  muggle  methods  were  the  smarter  of  the  two  choices     .     he  wondered  what  margot  would  think  of  his  extra  curricular  activities    .     hmm     .     ❛     shit  dick     !    ❜     he  whispered  violently  as  he  struggled  to  unlock  the  door     ;     a  feat  he  should’ve  had  finished  within  seconds    .     ❛     there’s  something  wrong  with  this  damn  thing     !    ❜      but  the  truth  of  that  matter  was     ,    remi  was  the  only  issue     .     there  had  never  been  a  door  he’d  met  that  he  couldn’t  unlock           but  he  was  too  preoccupied    ,   his  mind  too  busy  to  focus  on  the  task  at  hand    .      ❛     son  of  a       fuck  it    .   i’ll  just  tell  them  i  heard  something    .    got  worried     .     ❜       he  stood  back  up  and  pulled  his  wand  from  his  back  pocket     ,    pointing  it  in  frustration  at  the  door     .    

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹  ᎳᎾᏒmᏆᎪᎥᏞ  ⊹

remus didn’t usually lose his head so easily, in fact. it was the most attached head peter had ever seen. his friend as ingenious as he was chillingly sardonic. in all sense of the word,  aware.  however, all these admirable traits  had flown out the proverbial window for the sake of---  ?  well he wasn’t rightly sure.   ❝  hey !  hey hold on there-- ❞  eyes widening, peter first instinct was to reach for his friend’s shoulder. his brow furrowed with confusion at the quick shift in mood. he had never looked more uncomfortable than he did now, the quick energy that he’d taken to stopping remus from his mistake likely a strange sight for both.  it was difficult to be the one with a bit of sense, the request uncomfortable in his throat.   ❛   good on you for getting gung-ho, mate. but i think there’s a hole there.  ❜   peter avoided his friend’s furious eye and nodded to a crack in the stones at the base of the wall.  without waiting for approval, peter had disappeared. a thin rat tail’s the last thing seen of him as he crawled into the darkness of the wall. a few moments later, when the door swung open, peter leaned against the frame, effectively blocking remus from following after. there was a rare furrow to his brow as he studied his friend while standing with a lazy lean.   ❛    if you ever make me talk sense again we’re going to have words.   ❜  peter’s lip rose in one corner. it was usual for him to broach any subject as little as possible. but the remus standing in front of him just wasn’t the same, the worst change of the year by far. the look he passed the other boy was unreadable, although unhappy would’ve been a good guess.   ❝  where’s your head, mate ?  ❞

[conscience-killer]

[grettipcw]

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹   mᎪᏒᏞᎬᏁᎬ  ⊹ 

despite popular belief, marlene mckinnon HATED the spotlight. there was nothing she craved more than anonymity, the unfamiliar notion of freedom without spectators judging every single move she made. usually hogwarts was like a breath of fresh air for her, a much needed break from the scornful eyes of her families acquaintances only because her peers had other things to deal with that were often far more important than her. but now that her sex life was apparently all the rage among the rushed whispers, it began taking its toll on her. the blonde struggled to talk herself off the edge, her nerves getting the best of her as she stabbed her fork into the salad set in front of her.  ❛ tell me something good. something, anything. just get my mind out of this place for a couple of minutes.  ❜

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹  ᏢᎬᏆᎬᏒ  ⊹

he’d heard. there were probably very few who hadn’t.  the castle was always abuzz with the latest gossip, it made it hard not to listen to sometimes. even if you didn’t want to. especially this one, with too many moving parts sitting uncomfortable in his chest and themes too serious for him to tackle with the grace they deserved. however, with her sincere cry for help, none of that really mattered.  without knowing how, he still wanted to fix it. peter glanced up from his plate piled high with the usual lack of care,   ❛  just your mind ?  what about the rest of you ?  think bigger, marls.  ❜   he could’ve been joking, with the curve of his smile and reputation. but for anyone who knew him a long time, like marlene had, he laughed only because he wanted her to laugh with him.    ❛   sometimes talk just isn’t enough. why don’t we get out of here for real ?   ❜  

[mikeyjamesk]

me: guys… don’t worry, i’ll handle this

me: *ruins everything*

[bob-belcher]

[grettipcw]

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹  ᎶᏞᎪᎠᎽs  ⊹

“  does  everything  just  go  through  one  ear  and  immediately  out  the  other ?  “  the  hufflepuff  took  in  a  deep ,  seemingly  calm  breath .  though  it  was  let  out  in  a  clearly  exasperated  manner .  “  couldn’t  you  just  listen  to  me  for  once ?  “  the  pitch  of  her  normally  low  tone  rises .  she’s  almost  whining .  “  you  know ,  make  my  life  a  little  bit  easier ?  “  she  pinches  the  bridge  of  her  nose  with  her  thumb  and  forefinger .  “  it’s  as  if  you  actually  enjoy  receiving  detentions ,  which  surely  can’t  be  the  case .  “

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹  ᏢᎬᏆᎬᏒ  ⊹

❛  what else would i use two of them for ?   ❜   he chuckled, hopeful that it would be enough to prompt her to join him. gladys was wildly enthusiastic about her prefectal pursuits, and it had often landed him on the other side of her (as well as he could tell)   light-hearted  annoyance. he could’ve been wrong, and yes, he could’ve made things far easier by simply becoming travel size, a small shadow in the night for their shared convenience. she never had to see him again, really. but she wasn’t  so  far off.  he enjoyed their banter. which was why he grew quite still at the whinge in her voice, not truly wanting to press her so far.     ❛  what’s easy if you’re not having a bit of fun in the process, gladys ? besides, you haven’t let me go.    ❜    he reminded, fruitlessly wriggling in her spell.   ❛  remi’d call it a  ‘calculated risk’, i don’t run into you every time, you know.  i’m quite stealthy. really a detention or two is just . . . worth it.   ❜  

[listenuppnow]

[grettipcw]

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹ ᎠᎾᏒᏟᎪs  ⊹

Doe took in a deep breath and let it out slowly to prevent herself from jumping back at him so quickly. He was goading her and she could feel it, but it didn’t always mean she was the best at stopping it. The laughter in his voice was causing her eye to twitch, a side effect of being taunted in that way. “I appreciate you rounding up in my height, but both trees are still vastly larger than I,” she rebutted, flinching back as he skirted around her, giving him a wide birth as to avoid physical contact. “I’m curious as to whether or not you think you could take me,” she countered, changing the conversation from the Whomping Willow over to an opponent more manageable. 

* Ψ ⡊ ⋈ ˚⊹  ᏢᎬᏆᎬᏒ  ⊹

❛  alright,  two-times.  if i didn’t know better i’d say you   reallyyyy  wanted to hit me, dorcas.   ❜   his words were joking, laughs abundant. although a sliver of doubt veiled his expression, disappointment at her lack of humor sliding down the slope of his shoulders.  his feet took him a wary step away from the girl, noticing her avoidance of his frame.  as far as seventeen year old boys went, he was innocent,  if at times irritating.  but there were always those who took an instant dislike.  you’d think he’d be used to it by now.    ❛  i think i’m good. in case these noodles didn’t make that clear.   ❜   his shoulders gave a cheerful shimmy, sending lanky arms into loose waves while he flashed her a quick smile.