24yo gal from the Canadian boonies, sorta autistic nerd, lover of animals, video games, and seasoned taki enjoyerā¦
Will likely post infrequently, creativity is inspired most when least stressed, and Iām a busy gal. Just wanted somewhere to put my insanity out š
Mostly cod, twd, tlou, breaking bad, fallout, far cry, resident evil, and rdr related art. If these interest u, give a follow, Iāll follow back!
All love, joys š„°āØ
Tags for visibility, I donāt know if thatās cool but I wonāt do it like this on other posts I promise š
Iām not Christian, I donāt go to church anymore, and my pastor died, but when he was alive Iād sometimes go to his sermons and I remember one time he said āit feels good to hate, but we know that it isnāt allowed, so when weāre told that weāre allowed to hate someone we get so excited that we forget weāre supposed to loveā, and if my humble atheist ass might borrow some church talk Iād like to perhaps submit that
Anyhow sometimes on the day to day I feel disgust or revulsion and I have to ask myself āis this a danger to anyone at all or am I just looking for something Iām allowed to hateā and a solid 98/100 times itās the latter so once again thank you pastor D
Iāve been so inactive cuz life is wild and Iāve been drained of creativity due to it but I need to put something kinda cute and silly out while itās on the nogginā ;3
Keegan x reader & dogs fluff !!
Everyone at work mistakes you and Keegan for husband and wife. Itās absolutely baffling to you when it gets brought up.
For exampleā¦
Youāll be walking with him, with both your dogs in training, discussing menial things like strategies and drama, mostly just you yapping while he quietly listens and either validates your opinions or tries to give advice on issues youāre finding with certain people.
Youāre mid vent, stressed out, and unlike you, youāve stopped paying direct attention to your dogāyouāre that elated in the moment. And Keeganās being so attentive to you, he almost forgot about your dog as well, and his has been leashed with no need for concernā¦ but your sweet olā Luna has been such a good girl, and she doesnāt usually need to be leashed much anyhow.
But she still has her momentsā¦
Like in this instance, another soldier walking their dog enters the area, and before you can even reactāLuna takes offā¦ straight to the other dog, whoās also off leashā¦
The dog scatters, still a puppy in early training, and Lunas a well bred, hard trained meat missile of thunder and dominance. An alpha lady amongst your pack of assigned trainees. THE example.
Keegan doesnāt even hesitate.
One minute heās next to you, the next, his boy Chance is in your hands and Keegans taken off down the hill towards Luna and the other soldiers dog. The soldiers yelling at you, and youāre recalling Luna who isnāt even listening. So rare for her, yet so aggravating that it has to be THIS moment.
Keegan springs to action, grabbing her, and another soldier walks by, a corporal whoās known to be relatively chill, and he stops beside you. He watches as Keegan takes the lead, Chance sniffing his pant leg all the while, and youāre sighing in irritation.
āAt least your husbands getting a good workout in.ā
The words register, only halfway, but they do.
This is the fourth time in two months someone has called Keegan your husband.
You donāt even know what to say, the previous three times he was with you, and you both awkwardly brushed and laughed it off, but youāre so worked up from venting and Luna disobeying command that you blurt it out.
āOh heāsā¦ not my husbandā¦ā
You almost donāt even realize how bitter it came out, it almost sounds more like youāre mad heās not your husband, than a gentle blow off.
Truth be told? You had contemplated it once or twiceā¦
How much he pays attention to you.
How every time you accidentally bump into each other it feels like jello molding for just a moment before ricocheting apart.
That time Chance got too excited over another dog when he was a puppy, and unexpectedly dragged Keegan right into you, and he made every physical effort possible in quick reaction to soften the blow and keep you from getting sent straight into the groundāthe way his hand felt when he carefully placed it on your arm in perfect reactionā¦
And itās not like you havenāt hung out together outside of workāyou haveā¦ but it feltā¦ strange..?
There were moments it was almost a āyeah, I like thisā but there were also moments you felt ānot sure this would work long term, thoughā
And youāre not the type for short term, and you donāt fraternize with coworkersāat least, not since your server days when you were younger.
The man continues down the hill and asks the lady if sheās alright, her dog remained untouched by Luna thanks to Keeganās perfect reaction and intervention, and youāre still dumbfounded.
āMy husband.ā
Itās kind of nerve wracking that you donāt actually hate the sound. The implication that when others see you two together, they think you look like a couple.
Do you look good together?
Does he give the impression that he likes you to others?
Do you give that impression?
He approaches, slightly out of breath, Luna in hand, and he grabs her leash from around your shoulders. His fingers linger at your collar bone just a second too long, and youāre both in a haze of elated energies.
You look into his eyes, āThank youā¦ā is all you can even find the words to say.
He leashes Luna and hands you her, and youāre fidgeting with your sleeve so much you donāt even realize heās been holding your hand around Chances leash, trying to take him back but you forgot to even let go.
He grins awkwardly, a nervous laugh when you realize, and you drop the leash to him, āShit, sorryā¦ā
His grin only widens, and heās looking you over, but you hardly notice it until he brushes your shoulder with a caring touch, āItās all good, ignore her, Luna didnāt hurt that dog. Sheās just dramatic.ā
The attempt to comfort soothes you only a little, youāre glancing at the woman as sheās storming off cursing about leaving dogs off leash, like you werenāt in an off leash zone.
āHey,ā his voice snaps you back to him, his eyes are serious, attentively patient, āYou know Luna. She has her moments, but sheās a damn fine dog with incredible inhibition. Donāt worry about that chickāshe should be more confident so her dog actually gains confidence, itās an attractor for alphas like Luna. If sheās that insecure, an off leash zone isnāt where they need to be.ā
And the entire rest of the walk, you keep Luna leashed, who walks along with Chance as if nothing happened. Keegan listens and supports you while you vent about canine behaviours and training structures, and he helps you form a new plan and routine to better knock that damn recall response into Lunas nogginā.
You feel like a team, and suddenly? Maybe the term husband wouldnāt sound so crazy, if he even reached boyfriend status firstā¦
.ļ½„*ā³ā ć
This soooo isnāt kind of entirely but also semi loosely based on an experience I had/been having with a temporary coworker today/latelyā¦ Iām so long celibate from dating and relationships bro, I have theee worstttt trust issues and run at the earliest thing that I donāt like. This guy has given me the ick multiple times nglā¦ but also..? He kinda makes up for it in moments like this..?
Life is chaos and I just need to anonymously vent somewhere for a single moment
Trigger warning// reality
Cat in blanket for comfort <3
I wake up every day and avoid looking at my phone for the first 20 minutes, excluding work concerns as half my work takes place in my very phone (and yet, my phone bill gets no coverage from work)
I get ready, unable to eat, unable to interact with social media because if Iām still not awake and see another bleak reminder of how much evil resides within this world Iāll just throw up anything I try to eat.
I have 2-3 alarms when I used to wake up with just one single, gentle, sound of birds chirping. I turn the first two off and go back to sleep, and of course, the first one is scheduled almost 2 hours before Iām supposed to actually wake up.
I will have a miserable and already drained start to my day otherwise, and getting out of bed will be that much more a challenge and curse on my very existence.
I drive for an hour to work every morning, I drive around 70-100km every day, in general. This of course, is rarely if at all compensated by my employer.
I am paid the equivalent of a 14 year old shovelling driveways after school, not even enough to make rent, and I apply. Apply. Apply. To jobs like itās a second job.
I get declined.
I get declined.
I qualify.
I more than qualify.
I get declined.
Without even a shot at an interview.
āYou just need to put yourself out there!ā
The elder generations say.
What else have I done?
There are people making money harming children and the vulnerable, and I am losing money being a contributing member of society.
My friends message me.
I message back.
They donāt respond for hours, sometimes days.
They are suffering and miserable all the same.
We see eachother maybe once or twice a month, sometimes not for months at a time.
There are people making money harming children and the vulnerable with their āfriendsā every day.
I set my goals higher, as advised.
I get blocked at every turn.
I apply for food insecurity, I apply for low income security, I apply for jobs.
I get food insecurity.
I get low income support.
I get declined.
My boss tells me they cannot afford to pay me my rates any longer after I get a moderate risk injury that affects my work ability.
I cannot go to any clinic or medical care as I will be told what I already know; āYou cannot work. You must rest.ā
I canāt stop working, or I wonāt be able to feed my cat.
I wonāt be able to feed myself.
I sit down and play a video game, trying to allow myself even a moment of respite from things.
I cannot stop the guilty feeling that I should be continuing to push myself to apply to jobs I know I will be declined only moments later by an automated system.
I contemplate enlisting.
Oh.
I donāt have a birth certificate any longer.
I have no proof I was born in my own country.
I have to reapply for that.
My father pays my phone bill because he knows I canāt afford to pay it myself.
He consistently threatens to cut me off unless I spend $20 on gas I cannot spare to see him, because I need to save that money for my job to continue to make less than minimum wage.
I insisted on this job because any job at all was better than no job.
I regret it.
My coworkers are all leaving.
My boss has no clue that the team is revolting against their processes and unacceptable pay.
My boss has no clue that the team has begun discussing opening a suit against them over it.
I couldnāt afford a lawyer to participate even if I dreamed it.
There are people paying lawyers to help them keep their crimes against children and the vulnerable hush hush.
I contemplate if itās even worth it to file my taxes this year, I wonāt get much back, but at this point, itās anything at all.
But my taxes never go towards anything that supports or uplifts my community.
They go to people who are harming children and the vulnerable.
Am I even a good person anymore?
I worked hard and long in therapy.
And I beat the darkest of my thoughts to harm oneself.
And yet.
I wake up and avoid social media and have no stomach to eat or I will vomit before I even get out the door for my job that is killing my car, killing my spirit, killing my humanity.
I used to get excited when a man asked me on a date.
Now I wonder if he is just talking to me for my body, or if he does things on his devices that could have him convicted.
I am losing sense of my self control and generosity towards others, because what have I been offered at any point in my life?
There are people harming children and the vulnerable, and I pay my taxes believing it makes me a standup citizen when it only allows those evil, vile creatures, to remain above the rest of us.
Power, greed, and lust.
Because I do not possess these traits or desires at a criminal level, I am nothing to those that do.
And yet, I wake up every day and do it all over again, trying not to let the thoughts wander so far my car will end up in a 7 foot ditch, caved in.
Disclaimer: I am ok. Just tired. Broken hearted. Checked out. Exactly where they want us.
Activity will resume soon! Hopefully either once Iām settled or by latest sometime in March ā¤ļø itās a very busy timeframe, January sucked but February is bringing blessings. (:
I have like 4 projects in the works, and skater!Ghosts has quite a few sketch bases waiting to be finished!
I actually quite like it colored, may have to go back and recolour the Keegan onesā¦
Logan being blonde made it hard not to argue with coloring his hair, so inevitably the rest followed so it wouldnāt look strangeā¦ šāāļø
And I think I fixed the brush, yippeee! Made finishing this piece take MUCH longer than it shouldāve, plus general mental health/work/life balance latelyā¦ itās January!
I envy my fave CoD artists for how much they put out their art this monthā¦ Legends fr - continuous motivationā¦.
My iPad been tweaking lately and itās been so hard to finish this next skater!Ghosts au pieceā¦ Iām gnawing at the bars of my cage and slamming my head on the padded walls of my confine.. š
Anyone know how to fix when a procreate brush keeps glitching and creating flares/randomly jumping majorly in size for a brief second while trying to draw/erase with it. OF COURSE itās the brush I use the most for my style, and NONE of my other brushes are acting this wayā¦.
I tried every software fix thinking it was actually my iPad, but Iām beginning to think the brush is broken and I donāt even remember where I downloaded it from š
I think itās obvious that in a Ghosts 2 scenario theyād take the angle that Logan felt (or now feels after some brainwashing) that Hesh smothered him and always outshined him.
Like itās an easily identifiable trope. Person A grows up in Bās shadow. Becomes resentful. Cue character conflict. Dare I say easy?
So imo itās not a stretch that they were trying to set that up with the whole āLogan always follows David.ā Thing and would then rely on it to source a conflict for the brothers once Logan breaks.
