As a bisexual, I feel like we are not talking nearly enough (or at all), about how Amber being bisexual influences everything. Not only the public perception of, harassment, and reaction to her, but the very abuse she suffered. In case you don’t know, bisexuals are at the largest risk of intimate partner violence, domestic abuse, emotional abuse, and partner rape, when it comes to the different sexual orientations. We are also more at risk when it comes to depression, anxiety disorders, and suicide, compared to other monosexual orientations, due largely to the feelings of isolation and of being rejected by all sides of society, whether it be in heteronormative or gay spaces. It is no secret that both bisexual men and women are demonized in different ways (here using the binary language because of how the societal abuse and biphobia works differently through those stereotypes) and that in general bisexuals are considered cheaters, sluts, and incapable of commitment or a loving relationship unless it’s centered around sex, or we have “chosen” a side. All of this has a weight on this case: on the names people are calling her; on the way she’s been sexualized; on the specificities of the misogyny she’s suffering, where it often intersects with biphobia; on how she’s more vulnerable but seen as less vulnerable than a straight woman would; on the insane violent jealousy and biphobia he displayed during their relationship; even purely on her credibility, because bisexual people are largely considered to be liars (faking it, cheating, traitors, unreliable, usurpers, etc, it all revolves around lies and being deceitful in general). The sexual degradation he seemed to always default to using against her has a huge foot on biphobia, him talking about her as a cock-sucker, cum guzzler, and lesbian “counsel” makes that very clear. The way in which when he was constantly paranoid that she was cheating on him with other women, it was that (”lesbians”) women pursued her wherever she went, but then when he was ranting about her cheating on him with men, it was her going out of her way to pursue and please them. That’s seeing bisexual women as men pleasers who don’t actively seek wlw relationships, but attract “poor lesbians” or “masculine lesbians” to them, as though they are a trap for gay women. The way the public has always seen her as a sexy, untrustworthy, “using her feminine wiles to get what she wants” woman is misogyny, yes, but it also comes from biphobia as well. Those things cannot be separated when we’re speaking about a queer woman. All of this backlash, all of these abusive stories, all of this harassment vocabulary is traumatic and triggering not only to abuse survivors in general, but also for bisexual people who are already so vulnerable and feel so unsafe, even when not forced inside an overwhelming storm like this one. I feel that erasing that aspect of things is unfair to Amber, and the reality that she exists as a vulnerable queer woman, and she was abused as a vulnerable queer woman. Both.
prguitarman
stormborns
yousharknotpass
blakekathryn
dailybridgerton
