belly conklin x fem! reader. where the reader is conrad’s best friend from school, and at first belly finds herself feeling jealous, but then she realizes she has a HUGE crush on her, and then they kiss!!
jealous, belly conklin
-synopsis: since the age of twelve, belly had been jealous of your relationship with conrad. turns out, she was jealous of him the whole time.
-warnings: underage drinking, kissing, angst with happy ending, very vague mention of a man not taking no for an answer, fem reader
-notes: i got way carried away on this one, it's really long, i hope it's what you wanted!
Belly loved the summer house and the people in it. It was an extension of herself, the one constant she always counted down to, looked forward to, hated to leave, and always wanted to go back to. It had always been the Fisher and Conklin families, before Belly was born and long after she realized how joyous the place was. The summer she turned twelve, it became different though. That was the first summer she met you.
Conrad had spent the better half of a year begging his parents to let you go with them, that you were his best friend and he'd hate to leave you behind where all you'd have of this magical place were the stories he'd have when he got back. That's what Susannah had told Laurel when she questioned who you were. Belly just happened to overhear.
Belly hadn't cared much at the time. She'd thought that maybe another girl would mean less teasing, less jokes made at her expense. But as the summer progressed, she also felt jealous that you had just as much if not more attention from the boys as she did. They became your friends as much as they were hers. She decided then that she wished Conrad would've kept his school friends at school.
You had left a couple weeks early that summer, and Belly was glad things had gone back to normal for her last days at the beach house. It was just like it had been last summer, except it wasn't. You still lingered in the air, Conrad still talked about you and even Jeremiah and Steven did too. Belly found herself hoping as she got in the car that you wouldn't be back next year. That next summer would be the Fishers and the Conklins, no one else.
───☆───
The next summer had come, and Belly would be thirteen. It would be like any other birthday, just the parents, the boys, and her. But nearing closer to the beach house from the drive way, she knew by the laughter in the living room that you were back. Steven ran inside with Jeremiah who was previously helping with bags. Laurel gave a gentle squeeze to Belly's shoulder with a reassuring smile before following her son inside.
Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, Belly promised herself she wouldn't let you bother her this summer. The beach house was supposed to be for happy memories and a fun summer. She wouldn't ruin that, even if she didn't like the changes it came with.
Inside, Belly was surprised when you stood to greet her with a hug, the smell of your perfume lingering even after you pulled away to help Laurel carry bags. It wasn't so strong it burned Belly's nose, but it was present enough to leave a mark that said 'I was here'.
That summer, she got sick and had to stay inside for a few days until she was better. The boys left every day without her but you stayed back and ate popsicles with her. You watched her favorite films with her and played various games with her. Then when the boys came back at night, you'd leave her with Susannah and Laurel to go hang out with them.
Even when she got better and the boys left to go camp at the beach like they had in a previous summer, there you were, trying to roast marshmallows over the living room fireplace so she could have smores too. When she asked where you'd gotten the supplies, you'd responded that Jeremiah was easy to bribe out of food with the right trade.
Belly had to admit to herself that maybe your presence wasn't so bad, that if you came back next summer, she wouldn't be so upset by it. She finally liked not being left alone or stuck with the moms watching old films, though she did enjoy it.
She was starting to think that maybe you weren't the worst thing to happen, but all those thoughts came crashing down one day at the boardwalk. Conrad asked her to go after they'd both been left alone in the house. He bought her a caramel apple, he walked down the pier with her, and when he asked to go play ring toss, Belly understood why he'd brought her. She remembered a conversation between you and Conrad earlier in the week when you and Steven had gone to the boardwalk by yourselves. You came back talking about a giraffe they had on the prize wall at the ring toss game.
When Belly approached the stand with Conrad, she saw him look right at it. She realized then that there was probably more behind the title 'best friend' when he spoke about you or when you laughed at something he'd whisper in your ear as everyone left dinner. She dragged him over to the ring toss game and said to win a prize. She walked away from him, leaving him to the pretty girl working the game.
Conrad found her later, confused as to why she didn't come back. In his hands were two prizes, which surprised Belly. He held out a polar bear with sunglasses to her. "They said it was the best prize they had." Belly took it, her other hand pushing her glasses back up the bridge of her nose.
"I like the giraffe better. Thanks though." Belly walked away, leaving Conrad standing in the middle of the food court with the stuffed giraffe he'd won for you.
Belly cried that night. She was jealous, Conrad had dragged her all the way out to the boardwalk to win you the stuffed animal you'd seen with Steven. It wasn't fair, that's what she told Taylor when she got back home before school. Belly hadn't said goodbye back to you that summer, too sick with dislike to say it with any meaning.
Belly hoped more than anything you wouldn't come back next summer, but she knew you would, so she would bring Taylor. She thought maybe with her best friend there, the thought of you and Conrad would be distracted from her mind.
───☆───
It was mid-June, and Belly absolutely regretted bringing Taylor. She was only concerned with seeking Jeremiah's attention, leaving barely any of her own for Belly. Meanwhile, Belly had to sit on the sidelines and watch you and Conrad. Racing to the ocean, sharing huge bowls of ice cream, sitting next to each other at dinner, talking in hushed whispers and laughing so loud it rattled her heart.
Belly had brought Taylor hoping it would distract her from you, but she was constantly with Taylor, which meant you had all of your time to spend with Conrad. It shouldn't have mattered to Belly as much as it did, you were here for him anyways. He was the only reason you were there.
Later in the summer, Jeremiah wanted Belly and Taylor to be the judges of a surfing competition. Belly thought it would be just him and Steven, she hadn't seen you or Conrad all day, but then you both showed up, surfboards tucked under your arms as he laughed and you just watched with a smile.
Belly stood up to leave, everyone else was too busy to notice. Taylor was transfixed on Jeremiah who was already running out to the water with Steven, you and Conrad still stood in the sand laughing, hiding in the shade behind your surfboards.
Laurel watched her daughter walk in the back door, shoulders hunched and a frown etched deep into her face. "What's wrong? Are you not having fun out there?"
"I don't want her here." Belly mumbled, sitting on the couch between her mother and Susannah who held a glass of iced tea in her hands. The ice was making the cup sweat, so when Susannah reached out to Belly, her hand was cool and wet. She would've hated anyone else doing that, but it wasn't anyone else, it was comforting because it was Susannah.
"You don't have to bring her next year." Belly's frown deepened. They thought she meant Taylor. And it was true, she didn't want Taylor there anymore, but she meant it about you. She was tired of looking at you having so much fun with Conrad. She was sick of watching you do everything with him. She hated that you were with him all year round and she was only there in the summer.
Usually when summer came to an end, Belly hated having to leave the beach house. All she wanted was to stay there forever. But this year, she was ready to go. She was ready to escape the jealousy she felt every time she looked at you and Conrad. She was upset with Taylor and Steven who she caught kissing at the beach after Taylor promised not to hurt Jeremiah. It felt like that whole summer was just them falling apart. Before Belly got in the car, she tried to avoid the painful goodbyes. Not because she was sad, but because she couldn't stand to leave this place with her last memory being of you. You always said goodbye last and you would hug her and she wouldn't say anything, leaving you standing there in the driveway like she had the last two years. She couldn't handle it, not after this summer's chaos.
She wasn't fast enough though, or maybe you had come outside earlier. Belly watched you walk down the porch steps, Steven's hand wrapped around your elbow as he said something stupid, judging by the way your eyes squinted in confusion before Steven shook his head, signaling to dismiss what he had said. He walked around to the other side of the car, and Belly turned to get in before you said anything. To her misfortune, you were faster, wrapping your arms around her shoulders in the same hug you gave her every time you said goodbye.
"Goodbye, Belly. Have a good year. I'm sorry we didn't see each other much." You spoke in a whisper, just like always. It annoyed her. She didn't hug you back, she didn't say anything. She pulled away, turned towards the car, and got in. Not once did she look back, she never did. Belly had done this every summer since you arrived, she couldn't stand you any longer than she had to.
As Laurel drove away, Steven turned up the music he had on aux. Taylor was staring down at her phone, tapping away furiously. Belly could still feel the cool press of your rings on her sun warmed skin, she could still hear the softness of your voice, she could still smell the faintness of your perfume that was carried in the wind.
Next summer, Belly wouldn't pay you any attention. She wouldn't watch one more summer of you and Conrad when all she could do was sit and watch.
───☆───
As soon as the car stopped, Belly swung open the car door and stepped out into the gleaming sunlight. The cool breeze felt good on her skin, it was the feeling she'd been waiting for all year. She was so glad to finally be back in Cousins for the summer, forgetting all about what happened the last time she was here.
The front door to the beach house flew open, and Jeremiah ran outside, followed by Conrad and Susannah who lingered back a bit. They all shared hugs and greetings, until Steven finally asked where you were. It was the question Belly had purposefully tried to ignore.
"She's not gonna be here for a while, her cousin's getting married." Conrad answers, and Steven seems upset with the answer but drops it. Belly wished it would take longer than just a while for you to get to the house. But, it made easing into summer that much better. She hadn't been the only girl in the beach house since she was eleven. It was just like old times, Belly, Steven, Conrad, and Jeremiah. They went swimming in the ocean, had lunch by the pool, Belly watched movies with the moms while they boys went to a party. Belly had gone to sleep every day for a week with a smile.
One morning when she woke up though, that peace was gone. Belly had gone downstairs for breakfast, only to find you standing in the kitchen with Jeremiah, flipping pancakes and dodging the strawberries Steven was throwing at you. Belly frowned, you were there early. It had only been one week. Conrad mentioned exactly that, moving down the stairs around Belly to greet you. Even he hadn't known you'd arrive early.
"My cousin and her partner are going a few hours south of here to meet other family that can't make the wedding. This is just a pit stop so I thought I'd say hi." While you spoke, Steven threw two more strawberries at you, neither of which you were able to dodge. Belly watched from the stairs as Conrad tried to wipe the stains off the white shirt you wore. They were noticeable, right in the center of your torso. "It's not a big deal." You told him, taking the towel from Conrad's hand. Belly's stomach twisted, he smiled at you so easily, and your hand was on top of his before taking the towel. Jeremiah and Steven didn't even notice, taste testing the pancakes. Belly turned around and went back upstairs.
She didn't come back until the afternoon, preparing herself to see you standing with Conrad again. Against everything in her, she'd put on the smallest bit if mascara and lip gloss, hoping she'd be noticed better. Maybe the attention wouldn't be on you then, and she wouldn't have to see Conrad staring at you. You were gone by the time she stepped of the last stair. Jeremiah told her you'd left an hour ago when she asked.
Belly went back upstairs to take off the mascara and lip gloss. She changed into her swimsuit and rushed back down stairs, diving straight into the pool. She hoped Jeremiah hadn't noticed the makeup when she asked where you were, she didn't need it if you weren't there. She wouldn't see you with Conrad, that was all she put it on for to begin with.
On the day of her birthday, Belly still hadn't seen you since the surprise visit. She opened her gifts from everyone, they all had pancakes for breakfast, per her request. Conrad had asked if she wanted to go to the boardwalk, Belly agreed. Steven and Jeremiah ended up going too, but they went straight to the arcade as soon as they arrived. Conrad followed Belly to all the things she wanted to do, until it led them to a picnic table for a snack.
Belly didn't think it was a good idea to ask, but she had to know. She asked Conrad why he was friends with you. Belly wanted to know what was so important about you that he couldn't even leave you back for two months to be at the beach house.
"She's been my best friend for years. I've known her almost as long as I've known you. I just never really talked to her until the year before I first brought her here." Conrad shrugged, he didn't understand the importance of the question. But now that Belly had asked it and received the wrong answer, she didn't understand why it was important for her to know either. But she'd already asked, she wanted a real answer.
"That isn't what I asked you." Conrad sighed at that. He took a long sip of his drink and paused, almost as if he really had to think about the answer. Maybe he was just trying to avoid it.
"She was there for me when I needed someone." He answered shortly.
"And no one else was?"
"That's not what I meant." She knew. But she wanted a real answer, not a vague one, not one that could be misinterpreted. And she'd already asked twice. There clearly wasn't anything special about you, or Conrad wanted to keep something about your relationship secret. Either of those explanations would've confirmed Belly's suspicions.
"She just, she makes people feel safe with her even if they don't know her. She's just got that about her, y'know?" Belly had never heard Conrad say that about anyone. But, it made sense to her now though, why he would drag you miles from your own home and family every summer just to spend that extra time with you. It also made sense to her that you were more than his best friend, and she had a feeling she knew just how much more.
"Hey guys, guess who I just saw outside!" Jeremiah ran up to their table, Steven trailing a safe distance behind. Belly and Conrad stood up, following Jeremiah and Steven to the exit. The sun was setting, Belly hadn't realized how long they'd been there.
Just as Jeremiah said, you stood in the parking lot alone, a jacket draped over your folded arms. Belly guessed you'd come straight from the reception, judging by your slightly smudged makeup and the dress you wore that rippled softly around your legs in the breeze. Once you saw them, you reached into the bag hanging from your shoulder and handed each of them a pressed flower.
"My cousin saved me the leftover ones for my room. I don't need all the ones she gave me." The boys clutched onto them like it was all they'd ever have of you, observing every inch of their flower like it was the most interesting thing in the world. Belly put hers in her pocket. She didn't look back at you after she did, not wanting to know if you'd seen her do it.
Back at the house that night, Belly sat in her room, looking at the clock every so often. It was late for her to still be up, even for it being summer. Everyone was asleep, so she got ready to go for a night swim. This was the latest she had ever gone, so there was no chance Susannah would come down tonight. She'd have the pool all to herself, but she was wrong.
On a chair across the deck from the door, you sat looking out to the stars above the ocean. Hearing the creak of the door, you look back to see Belly standing there, a towel tightly clutched in her hand. Belly was surprised when you didn't smile at her before you looked away. You always did, and it felt odd to Belly that you didn't. She wondered if something happened, if you were upset with her about the flower or if you finally gave up on trying to be nice to her.
Belly considered going to sit next to you, but as she walked farther out from the deck, she saw the look on your face, illuminated by the moonlight. You weren't mad, or sad, or upset. You were just there. There was nothing wrong, so Belly dropped the towel on the closest chair to the pool and dove in. She swam her laps, took short breaks to just float, and every time she looked back at you, you were still there, eyes never once leaving the sky.
Finally feeling tired, Belly got out of the pool and wrapped herself in the towel. She headed towards the door to go back inside, but something made her stop. Something made her want to go sit with you and watch the stars, just for a bit. You still didn't look away from the sky as Belly sat next to you, and she didn't say anything. She tucked her knees up to her chin to fully wrap the towel around herself and she watched the stars with you.
She had no idea what you were thinking, or if you were even thinking about anything at all, so she quietly kept an eye out for any shooting stars until you suddenly moved your hand to your pocket. Belly jumped slightly, not expecting you to move. You pulled out a small box and handed it to Belly.
"Happy birthday, Belly." Then you turned back to the stars. She carefully removed the lid from the box, revealing a small starfish charm glinting delicately in the light from the moon. "For the charm bracelet you've got. It's to remind you of this place even when you aren't here. I know how much you love it here." That was all you said, and Belly assumed it's all you would say.
She stared down at the charm, and thought back to what Conrad had said earlier at the boardwalk. She makes people feel safe with her even if they don't know her. She's just got that about her, y'know? Belly now knew how true that really was. Even back when she first met you, you had been the one to make sure she never felt left out, you'd sit with her when she was sick or when the boys would leave without her. You'd always tell her to have a good year when she left and you meant it every time, even when she left you standing in the driveway without saying anything back. You'd gotten her something to remember this place and all the amazing memories it held.
Belly realized there was nothing about you that she could hate. Not the way your voice lingered in her head all the way home at the end of the summer, not your perfume that she could smell long after you'd vanished from sight, not the cooling metal of your rings that came with every touch or hug you gave her, not the welcoming smile you always wore. Even tonight, when she first walked out the door and saw you. She realized if it had been anyone else besides Susannah, she would have turned around and gone back inside. For some reason, it didn't bother her that you were out there with her. She felt safe.
"Good night, Belly." Belly looked up from the charm to see you already halfway back inside. "Don't stay up too late, you'll hate yourself for it in the morning." You were gone before Belly could say anything back. She wished she would've said something, she didn't even say thank you. It made her think about every summer she never said anything back, never hugged you back, never looked back.
Summer was over fast after you got there. Belly didn't try to avoid your goodbyes this time, but she was confused now. Why was she now realizing that all the things she thought she hated about you, she didn't and never had? She still didn't hug you back. She still didn't say goodbye. But halfway down the street, she looked back. It was the first time she ever did, and she wished she hadn't. Your arms were crossed over yourself, the same way she did when she felt bad. You were frowning, and then Conrad was at your side, wrapping an arm wound your shoulder and leading you back inside, a gentle smile on his face. Had it always been that way?
───☆───
It was spring break now, and Belly was still confused about last summer. She tried talking to Taylor about it, but she couldn't form the right words. All those times she saw you with Conrad, was it really you she was jealous of? Or was it just wishing that she was doing those things with you instead. Did she hate your goodbye hugs because if she hugged back she wouldn't let go? She missed the nights the boys left and it was just you and her, making your own jokes to laugh at. She finally recognized that she wanted to be the one you turned to, not Conrad.
Her whole life, she was so sure she wanted Conrad, for him to want her and to be with him. Now she wasn't sure that's what she'd wanted. Maybe deep down, she'd wanted the giraffe at the boardwalk because you wanted it, and it was subconsciously as close to you as she could get at the time.
Belly had stared at her phone for hours over the course of spring break, debating whether or not to call. She had no idea what she would say if she did, but she didn't like being confused over it. Time kept passing and Belly never called. And before she even knew it, school was out, exams were done, and she was packing her bags to go back to Cousins.
The ride there was the same as always, but when the car pulled in to the drive, only Jeremiah was on the porch waiting. He hugged Steven first before Laurel made her way over to ask about Susannah, to which Jeremiah responded that she was inside sleeping. Conrad came around the house a few moments later, pausing at the sight of them like he'd forgotten they were coming. He quickly greeted them before Steven announced it time for a 'Belly flop'. Conrad and Jeremiah were quick to follow. Belly looked around for you, but you weren't there. She guessed you were inside somewhere, waiting for them.
When Belly hit the water, she heard a new tone of voice added over the laughter of the boys. Swimming back to the surface, she saw you over Conrad's shoulder. You were smiling, hitting Steven's shoulder playfully. Belly swam over to the edge of the pool where you met her and kneeled down to help her out of the water. Once you were both sitting on the ground, you pulled Belly in for a hug, getting the front of your shirt wet. You both laughed and for the first time, Belly hugged you back. Things were going to be different that summer, she'd make sure of it.
Something was already different, though. Jeremiah and Conrad had never really paid her much attention before, but their stares had lingered a little longer than they ever had. Even Susannah had said Belly looked prettier, and she wondered if maybe your stare would linger as long as the boys' had. She hoped so.
The bonfire party came later in the week, and to Belly's disappointment, you'd spent most of that time with Conrad more than anyone else. Steven had told her not to go, and that he wouldn't be responsible for her. Belly didn't really want to go, but if was the only time she'd get to see you, she would go.
She called Taylor that night, asking her friend's opinion on what to wear. The call consisted of less help than meaningless bickering about what she should say to you. After the call had ended, Belly stared at her reflection in the mirror. She wondered if the dress she'd put on would even be noticeable to you, or if you would even care.
A thud echoed from across the hall, breaking Belly's thoughts. She went to see where the noise had come from, which led her to your room. Before she could say anything, the door flew open, revealing you in a shorter dress than you'd worn before and your makeup that hadn't been redone since the morning. You were shocked to see Belly standing there, waiting for you to say something.
"I heard something fall." Belly watched the crease between your brows even out, the confusion leaving your face.
"I just knocked my phone over. No big deal." You shrugged, stepping out of your room and closing the door behind you. "Are you going to the party?" You ask, eyes tracing over the dress Belly wore.
"Oh, um, yeah. Don't tell Steven though." Belly looked down, realizing that Steven would see her once she got there, so you telling him wouldn't even matter.
"Don't worry about him, go and have fun. He can be mad later, you look great." You put an arm around Belly's shoulders, leading her to the stairs so you could go.
Steven, Conrad, and Jeremiah had already left, the party was undoubtedly already in full swing. Belly would have questioned why you didn't go with them, but she knew from Conrad and Jeremiah's stories that you were always late to parties anyways.
Belly went around to the passenger side of your car, waiting for you to get your keys. She glanced in the window of the backseat and saw in the small amount of moonlight a stuffed giraffe in the middle seat. The one Conrad won at the boardwalk. A frown pulled at her lips as you walked outside, unlocking the car. Belly immediately got in, looking out the window. Getting in the car yourself, Belly felt your eyes on her, and when she looked at your reflection in the window, she saw the worry in them.
"We don't have to go. We can stay back and watch movies." You say, pausing to put the key in the ignition.
"No. I want to go." Belly still didn't look back, but she truly did want to go now. She couldn't go back inside and go to bed. It felt like every time she thought maybe she had a chance, Conrad came right back. The giraffe in your backseat was proof enough that she was right. She was going to the party, either with you or someone else to distract her from that thought.
"Okay." The car started, and the whole drive, Belly didn't look anywhere but out the window. You'd glance at her once in a while, making sure she was still okay. Belly tried to ignore it, just focusing on the music softly playing from the radio.
Barely waiting for the car to park along the crowded street, Belly tried to open the door. You locked it before she could, causing her to groan in annoyance. "Promise you'll tell me if you want to leave."
"Fine." Belly still didn't look at you, and she tried the door again. "Just unlock the door so we can go."
"Look at me, Belly." Finally, she turned to look at you, one hand still on the door and frowning. "Promise, or I'll turn around."
"I promise." Her shoulders deflated into a more relaxed posture, and you unlocked the door. Belly split from you as soon as you got to the crowd of people drinking and laughing. She needed a minute alone before she could go back to you or she got caught by Steven.
"Hey, Belly!" Jeremiah was walking over to her, a full solo cup in his hand. He held it out to her, and laughed at the grimace on her face as she looked down at it. "Don't worry, it's just water. I'm driving tonight."
She took the cup, from him and downed about half of the water before handing it back. Her nervousness had dried her throat. Jeremiah just shook his head with a smile. "Wait, how'd you get here? Some creep didn't drag you here, right?" It was Belly's turn to laugh, and she shook her head, explaining she'd come with you.
"Actually, did you see where she went?" Jeremiah squinted, trying to remember if he'd seen you.
"I don't think I've seen her yet, I mean you just got here, right? Maybe Steven knows, he was hanging around by the fire." He responds, turning to go in the direction Steven was.
"No, I don't want him to know I'm here yet." Belly stops him, and Jeremiah frowns but doesn't argue.
"I can ask Conrad." Belly nods, and Jeremiah leaves the cup of water with her as he goes racing off to find his brother.
A few minutes later, Jeremiah comes back, reaching for the water cup back from Belly. He took a long drink before answering Belly's previous question about your whereabouts. "She's actually with him right now. They're over by the water." Jeremiah points towards the ocean in a vague pattern, but Belly thanks him anyway and makes her way down the beach.
However, as Belly got closer, she stopped, trying to register what was happening in front of her. You were kissing Conrad, and clearly so distracted you didn't even notice the tide getting the side of your shoe wet. Your hands were in his hair and his arms were around your waist and Belly felt so upset that she almost didn't notice the man standing a few feet from you drop his cup and walk away.
Steven suddenly appeared with Jeremiah and a girl she hadn't seen before, and she was too frozen to even consider trying to run away before Steven saw her. "Belly, what are you doing here?" Her eyes turned to Steven who was quickly approaching her, she hadn't seen you when you appeared next to her, gently taking her arm and leading her away before Steven got to her.
"Let me go!" Belly tried to pull her arm away from you. You didn't let her go until you were both a safe distance from the crowd on the beach.
"Belly, just breathe." You stood in front of her, and she tried to move around you. "Belly." You blocked her again.
"Just let me go."
"Go where? And who with?" Belly didn't know, she just wanted away from you, and Conrad, and Steven. She didn't know when her tears started falling, or when you hugged her and she fought against your hold until she finally gave up. She let you run your hand up and down her arm to soothe her, you let her cry into your shoulder. "I'm sorry." You whispered.
Belly realized she'd been right, that it had always been you and Conrad. No matter how badly she hoped, it would never be you and her. Maybe she could've changed that if she'd been nicer all those past summers, maybe if she would've matched your efforts to be there, that could've been her you kissed on the beach.
"Let's go home, okay?" Belly nodded, she let you lead her back to your car. Even when you'd gotten home, she let you lead her up to her room, wash the light makeup she had on off her face and laid out a change of clothes. After you'd left her with a 'goodnight', Belly lay awake staring at her ceiling. The summer had just started, she couldn't handle watching you and Conrad all summer. She had barely tolerated it in previous summers. It would hurt worse to see it knowing for certain that you loved him.
She wasn't sure how long she had laid there when she heard stumbling on the stairs followed by a string of quiet curses. She heard you and Jeremiah say goodnight before Jeremiah's door closed and Conrad's swung open, hitting the wall before there was a long pause of silence.
Belly quietly got out of her bed and went to her door, cracking it open just enough to see what was happening. You were backing out of Conrad's room, whispering something she couldn't hear before shutting his door. Belly closed her own door, it wasn't loud, but it was audible. She stood behind her now closed door, listening as you stopped on the other side of it.
"Belly," She didn't respond, she didn't move. She just stood and stared right at the door where your face you be if she opened it. You sighed. "Good night." Belly listened until the sound of your footsteps quieted and your door squeaked shut across the hall.
Belly couldn't fall asleep, even after she had been back in her bed for an hour. She couldn't stop thinking about what she'd seen at the party, what you might've told Conrad before you shut his door, what you probably did the rest of the year when you weren't at the beach house. She wondered if you slept more peacefully than her, not knowing how badly Belly's heart was breaking.
The next morning, Belly didn't want to leave her bed. She didn't want to see you and Conrad, it would just make last night more real. Unfortunately for her, her mother walked in at the exact second she turned away from the door to go back to sleep.
"Belly, you need to get up. It's already late." Laurel sat on the edge of her daughter's bed, pulling the sheets off Belly's head.
"No. Can't I just sleep today?"
"It's summer Belly, go out in the sun, you can sleep tonight." Laurel sighed, standing up and going back to the door. She told Belly that you, Conrad, and Steven had gone to get drinks and muffins. Belly got up then. She thought she could go downstairs, eat something, and escape the house before you got back. Jeremiah was the only one at the time Belly could stand to see without being lectured or heartbroken.
"Finally! I thought I was gonna have to sit out on the surfing competition today." Jeremiah smiled up at Belly as she entered the kitchen, grabbing a box of cereal and a bowl, taking the milk from the counter before Jeremiah could refill his glass.
"I'm not going." Belly said, stuffing a spoonful of cereal into her mouth. Jeremiah rolled his eyes.
"Of course you are, Steven's an unfair judge."
"No I am not!" Steven appeared in the doorway, a box balanced on one arm and a coffee cup in the other. Belly froze, she hadn't made it out in time.
"Yes you are, you give us all twos at best." Conrad followed after Steven with another box.
"That's not true." Steven argues, sliding Jeremiah's cup over to set down the box he carried.
"It so is. Just because we're better than you." Belly didn't look anywhere but her bowl of cereal, your voice was the last one she wanted to hear right now.
"Shut up, just because you went to a fancy camp-"
"No I did not!" You and Steven continued the banter as you set down the drink carriers balanced in your hands. Conrad opened the muffin boxes, mindlessly reaching for one as his eyes full of amusement never once left you and Steven you were now pushing each other.
"Hey! Watch the food, some people are actually hungry." Childishly, Steven stuck his tongue out at Jeremiah, who in turn rolled his eyes.
"Didn't your mom tell you we were bringing muffins?" Belly looked up for the first time since you got back. The boys had left the kitchen with their plates of muffins and drinks.
"Yeah, I didn't want to wait. I thought you'd be longer." Belly lied, putting her bowl in the sink and muttering that she'd come back later to clean it. She quickly left to go back to her room, getting right back into her bed.
A few minutes later, there was a knock at her door before it was gently pushed open. You walked in with a plate of muffins and two drinks balanced in your hands. Walking over to Belly, you held out one of the drinks, sitting next to her. Once Belly had taken the drink, you set the plate down in front of her on the bed.
"I know you're upset with me Belly." She looked at you, pretending not to know what you meant. "I would've talked to you about it last night, but I think it was best we both slept off a bit of emotion before talking." Belly looked away, she wasn't ready to have this conversation yet. Not last night, not now, probably not ever. Her heart couldn't take it. "Talk to me, and if you still hate me after we talk, I'll leave you be."
"Do you love him?" Belly's voice was hardly above a whisper, but you heard, and with a small sigh, you answered, knowing exactly who she was talking about.
"He's my best friend, Belly. He has been for years. There's a thing about a friend like that, that just becomes a part of you and your life. I do love him, very much. But I'm not in love with him and he's not in love with me." You explain gently, eyes never leaving the side of her face.
"So why'd you kiss him?" Belly looked at you, there was a certain sadness in them that broke your heart.
"Because some people don't listen to words like they do actions." That's when Belly remembered the man that had stormed away from you before Steven and Jeremiah showed up. She hadn't thought anything of it when it happened, too focused on her own heart breaking.
"Oh." Belly took a sip of her drink. Maybe she had misread the whole thing.
"You can talk to me Bells." You hadn't called her that before, she wished you would've. She wished you'd keep doing it.
"I like you." Belly blurted before she could talk herself out of it. You smiled at her.
"I know. I like you too." Belly's eyes scrunched in confusion. "I was just waiting for you to figure it out yourself."
"I hate you." Belly smiled then, her face relaxing as you both laughed.
"That's not what you just said."
"No." Belly thought back to all the summers she'd spent with you that led up to now, you laughing in her room. You liked her, not Conrad. "What was that thing you were saying about actions..." She laughed again as you rolled your eyes in fake annoyance.
"What do you want? My muffin? My drink?" This time Belly rolled her eyes and you'd laughed, but she still took the drink, setting both on the night stand beside her.
"I want you to kiss me."
"Okay." You took her face in your hands and kissed her. Belly hadn't realized before, but she lived for this moment. She could've done this all along, had your lips on hers, your hands in her hair, rings pressing lightly against her cheeks, your perfume drowning her in a scent that made everything but you disappear.
When you pulled away, she found herself wishing you hadn't. She didn't want you to stop, and then it hit her that she'd only ever have you in the summer. You lived hours from her, she couldn't go to you whenever she wanted. She had just finally gotten you, and not even three months later, she'd have to let you go.
"I'll come find you." Your voice broke her thoughts.
"What?"
"When summer's over." Belly thought you'd read her mind, you knew the look she had in her eyes. "I'll be there when you need me." She didn't say anything, she didn't want to think about it. Summer had just started anyway, and now she had you. She kissed you again, ignoring your complaint about the muffins that still hadn't been touched. How could she care about those muffins right now when she'd been waiting long enough to finally kiss you?
hi!! saw your post about requests for grishaverse soo,
maybe you could write something with zoya? like first kiss with her or confessing feelings? (fem!reader please:)
or the same with inej, if you’re feeling more like it.
have a lovely day/night!!<3
first kiss with zoya and inej
Zoya:
She was upset when you found her after training. Alina had gotten the upper hand and it left Zoya fuming. She subconsciously made her way toward the lake where you often found yourself. You were in fact there, sat under a tree reading a new book. Zoya acknowledged that you were there but was too upset to say anything.
After a while of standing only a few feet from where you sat, you stood up and made your way over to her. "Didn't go too well, did it?"
"No." You stayed silent after her short answer, opting to stare out at the lake with her instead of ask questions. Every once in a while, she'd sneak a glance at you, until she felt herself calming down. At least enough to speak to you.
She looked at you again, this time long enough for you to meet her gaze. With a knowing smile, you tilted your head to look at her better. That's when she leaned over and kissed you. It was quick, but sweet. For Zoya, at least.
"That was just a distraction from this morning." She says quickly, looking back to the lake.
"Of course."
───☆───
Inej:
The two of you worked together on The Wraith, attacking slaver ships and freeing people. You'd also been working on Inej's trauma, and made a system so it was easier for her to deal with it. It also helped she didn't feel as trapped or alone now.
The two of you and the crew were in Novyi Zem, taking a break from the voyages you'd been on back to back. Inej sat alone in the flower field the two of you had found, and she concentrated on weaving flower stems together like you had shown her.
Your voice broke her from her concentration, however, but she didn't mind. Because in your hand was a basket of foods and drinks as well as a map and compass.
Inej tucked the flowers aside as you sat next to her and smoothed out the map in front of you. "Ready to plan our next route, captain?" Inej gave a small smile in response, reaching for the water you had stashed in the basket.
A while later, everything was planned and the map had been refolded and stored away. The sun was setting by then, casting a pink and orange glow over your faces. Inej couldn't help staring before quickly looking away when you noticed.
"What, do I still have crumbs on my face?" You laugh, and Inej finds herself laughing with you. In a spur of confidence, she leans forward and kisses you before pulling away, a shocked look on both your faces. Realizing she felt not only fine, but good after doing so as well as seeing the grin on your face, she kissed you again, a little longer that time.
i am DEPRIVED of jesper content. we as a society deserve soft!jesper falling in love with a grumpy reader
sun x moon dynamic with jesper fahey
-When you first met, Jesper was out with Nina and they ate in the place you worked at
-He didn't think too much about it until he saw you again and again in various spots across Ketterdam
-Eventually, every time he went out, he would search for you somewhere in the crowd and go back to your work place hoping to see you
-He finally approached you one day in a shop just south of west stave and was initially put off by the cold shoulder you gave him
-That did not deter him though, and every time he saw you after that, he would come up to you until you gave into his presence
-After that, you didn't immediately glare at him when he would "coincidentally" show up in the same place you were
-It took Jesper longer than he would have liked, but he got you to meet him a street down from the harbor one morning to walk together
-Those walks became habits, and while sometimes there was (mostly one sided) conversation, other times it was filled with comfortable silence
-He would always try to do something, whether it be dumb or actually funny, to get you to laugh
-It was very rare he saw you smile, and the first time he did he swore his heart stopped (Nina would tell him later it did not, but rather sped up to an annoying pace, in her opinion)
-After you had met the other crows, Jesper was pleased to see you and Inej got along quite well
-There was a balance between you two, your calmness evened out Jesper's buzzing energy and his cheerfulness eased your worries
-Luckily for Jesper's wallet, your reluctance to be around a city packed full of people kept Jesper inside on some days that he'd normally spend gambling away everything he had
-And luckily for you, Jesper knew the sometimes extensive list of things you didn't like and always makes sure to avoid them
-He still makes as many jokes as possible, he really loves seeing your smile and hearing your laugh, especially after failed jobs with the crows
Hi! I saw that you've opened your requests for s&b sooo can I request a Nikolai x reader where they're in an arranged marriage and they're distant with each other but one day they get ambushed and she's the one who saves Nikolai (like she can fight and she's good at it) and Nikolai is surprised and he starts seeing her differently and they start spending time together and confess? Angst to fluff kind of thing 👉🏻👈🏻
pearls to opals, nikolai lantsov
-synopsis: your new husband takes a liking to make small aspects of your new life miserable. it isn't until a close call in an ambush that he truly sees you for who you are, not as your parents painted you to appear.
-warnings: injuries, fighting, me not knowing a thing about boats, def not proofread and a bit rushed (i'm so sorry)
Pearls glinted in the dim lighting, reflecting off your mirror as you stare at your reflection. You didn't want pearls, you hated them actually, yet you had to suffer through an entire wedding and celebration with their weight setting into your collarbones. That wasn't even the worst of it.
This wedding was yours, to a man you knew nothing about besides his name. Everything felt wrong, like you were in someone else's skin, taking someone else's place. And in a way, you supposed you were. A soft knock on the door breaks your mind from wandering too far, and at your permission, your mother enters the room, glittering from head to toe in blue velvets and shimmering sapphires. You wondered how she managed to pull off so much blue.
"Feeling alright?" She asks, sitting on the open end of the stool you sat upon.
"Just fine." No, not at all. This whole thing had been arranged, for the better future of Ravka. That's what your father had told you the day you found out of this predicament. A few choice words had slipped past your lips that evening, angering your father, but you didn't care, this was your life, not his. Your anger had been brushed off though, and this was where it led you, a dim room in the palace you were to be married in in mere minutes.
"Good. You look wonderful, the pearls look wonderful on you. Excellent choice on my behalf." The words made your stomach churn with sickness. The pearls didn't belong to you, and even if they had, you would have thrown them into the depths of the sea before ever wearing them. "Come, it's time."
───☆───
That had been months ago, and you had been living comfortably yet miserably since then. Your new husband, Nikolai, had been relentless in his remarks against you during the first weeks of the marriage, but in the last two months, he'd hardly spoken a word to you. You'd sleep in the same bed but on opposite ends, never touching in between. You'd sit beside each other at meals, but only spoke when asking for something closer to the other.
It was constant working around each other, you were hardly in the same room during the waking hours of the day. Keeping this in mind, you weren't sure why your feet carried you towards the harbor Nikolai's returning ship would soon be docked on. He hadn't been there for you, why are you going for him?
The question plagued your mind as you sat on a bench, watching as part of the ship's crew jumped onto the dock, securing the boat to ensure it wouldn't drift away with the tide. Finally, the ramp was set in place and the crew on the docks rushed aboard the ship while others carried crates of various sizes off, a few nodding to you in acknowledgement, which you returned.
A boy slightly younger than you came running off the ship, weaving between the people surrounding him, the unmistakable shout of Nikolai's voice sounding after the boy. He ran right at you, dropping something into the palm of your hand as he passed. You squint after him in confusion, his broad shoulders crashing into the people lining the streets as his long legs carried him away from the docks at a quick pace. Looking back towards the ship, you stifle a laugh and the glare Nikolai sent to the back of the boy's head from over the railing. You quickly turn your head when his gaze turns to you, but you didn't miss the frown that turned almost deeper at the sight of you.
The feel of something in your hand became apparent as you remembered it, but at the sight of it, you wished you hadn't looked. A pearl bracelet with a golden clasp rested in your palm, suddenly feeling heavier that it was. Pushing through the wave of the crew with crates adorning the tops of their shoulders, you climbed the ramp to the boat, weaving your way to Nikolai, who stood surrounded by three other men and women. With a sigh, he waved them away, promising to meet them later, and you took that as a sign to approach the man.
"These wouldn't be of any importance to you, would they?" You hold your hand out, revealing the set of pearls that was currently weighing down your hand with vicious yet imaginary weight.
"Are they not to you? I was under the impression that a girl like you would swoon over such a thing." Nikolai responded dryly, taking the bracelet from your hold.
"Well you're wrong. I prefer diamonds. Pearls are for women like my mother." Nikolai let out a laugh at that, though he was anything but amused by the comment.
"Of course you would prefer the expensive alternative." He was wrong, though. You didn't hate diamonds, but they were better than pearls in your eyes. Anything was, really. Pearls were not yours, they never had been and never would be, but Nikolai couldn't have been more oblivious to the fact as he wrapped them in a soft cloth and returned them to an open crate nearby, presumably where the running boy had taken them from to begin with.
Before you could question why the boy had taken them to begin with, a loud noise echoed through the harbor, followed by the unmistakable sound of gunfire.
"What is going on?" Nikolai didn't get an answer, as you had shoved him aside. One of the attackers swung himself onto the ship, rifle firing at where the two of you had just been standing.
"What does it look like." you frown, breaking off a stick of wood from a barrel that had been broken by the gunfire.
"What are you-" Once again, Nikolai receives no answer his mouth being covered by your free hand, eyes peering around the crates the two of you were hid behind. A creak in the boards sounds from behind, making Nikolai turn to look, but when his eyes returned to your spot, you were gone. Though he had no time to wonder where you had gone before the barrel of a pistol was pointed right at him. Slowly, Nikolai raised his hands, uncurling his legs from beneath him even slower as to not alarm the raider.
"Where are those pearls? I know you've got 'em." Nikolai chooses not to respond as he tries to form a plan of attack. You however, seemed to have beat him to it. With a loud crack, the attacker is sent falling forwards, Nikolai quickly scrambling to the side to avoid being crushed under the other man's weight. You stood before Nikolai now, the stick from the crate held tightly in your hand.
"Well, I guess we both have a reason to hate pearls now." With a disinterested glare, you turn your back to him and race off the boat to the docks where the rest of Nikolai's crew was fending off the others who attempted to attack the ship. He quickly regains a hold of the situation, running behind you to fight as well.
Half distracted, Nikolai fights alongside his crew, still sparing a few too many glances at you. Maybe, he thought, he'd been wrong about you. Or he had just overlooked the obvious. You had held yourself as more of a fighter than a diplomat, someone who was shoved into a role they did not want to play, he knew that feeling too well and wondered if it was too late to fix what shouldn't have happened to begin with.
───☆───
Returning home was not something you looked forward to, anticipating a lecture of some sort. Accompanied by more silence and a continuance of glances that were gone before you could tell if they were real or not. The thought of being ignored by your own husband in a home that was not yours was terrifying, and you hated every moment of it. However, Nikolai spent the journey planning how to change that, how to start over all the things he should have done sooner.
The dirt path came in to view just outside the harbor town. It was a view you'd seen only a few times since your arrival in Ravka, but you'd always wondered what the path looked like from the road travelling through it rather than around it.
"What's caught your eye out there?" Nikolai had been observing your tense posture since the carriage doors opened and he'd sat across from you.
"Nothing. Just looking." You respond. Maybe one day you could come back and travel it yourself. Then, you'd have all the time in the world. He nodded, dropping the subject though he knew it wasn't true.
Once you'd arrived back, you were quick to make a move back to your room, but a hand on your wrist gently pulled you back. Nikolai's hand.
"I need to say something before you go running off again," He sucked in a sharp breath, eyes staring deep into your own, like he was just seeing you for the first time. "I want to start over."
"What?" You were nothing but confused and tired and there was probably an injury somewhere that you needed to take care of.
"This marriage is not what it should be, I know that. And, I apologize it's taken me so long to realize that it was not your fault, but mine." The tension in your shoulders seemed to match his now, this wasn't the conversation you'd imagined would take place. "I've misjudged you, and I've not even given you the time you deserve. If you'd like to leave this place, me, I couldn't rightfully stop you. But if you stayed, this time I'd give you more than just a crown or a spared glance, I can promise that fully to you right now."
This was the promise you'd been waiting for, but it didn't feel right. Not after everything you'd been put through this far.
"I won't leave." The tension in Nikolai's face slowly loosened up. "But it will take time to fix what was broken to begin with."
"Of course. I wouldn't expect anything else."
───☆───
Two months later, your relationship with Nikolai had mended. You were closer than ever, and even the air around the two of you seemed lighter than after the marriage.
One morning when you had been awoken and told to meet Nikolai in the garden, you hadn't been expecting him to take you on the path you'd stared at on the night of the ambush. It was even better than you'd imagined. It was lush and green and the sunlight cast an ethereal glow through the leaved and branches hanging above your heads.
"It's beautiful out here."
"Not as beautiful as you." Nikolai grinned, that stupid grin that made your heart flutter.
"Oh, please." You turn away from him, instead kneeling by a bush blooming with pink and yellow flowers.
"I'm serious," He starts, kneeling beside you and picking a pink one, tucking it gently behind your ear. "Before I forget, I've got something for you." You watch as he pulls something from his pocket and holds it out to you. It was a thinly wired gold ring with an opal stone. It was simple, but it was the prettiest ring you'd ever seen.
"I know you could care less for diamonds, truly. I thought it might suit you." He takes your hand, sliding the ring onto your finger. It glinted in the sunlight, reflecting sparkles in your eyes as you admired it.
"I love it, thank you." Lifting your eyes to meet his, he's already looking at you, a soft look like he'd give you everything, and he would.
hi! saw you are open for asks 🦢 i have this idea with kaz and reader, where kaz is like ready for the next step to make more bold touches, but reader still acts super cautious with him. maybe their touchy with others but strain themselves with kaz for his comfort and it makes him sad mad( so he makes the first move and reader is kinda shoked but ofc happy
hope it’s fine 🤍
red lily, kaz brekker
-synopsis: after a job across kerch, you question if kaz wants you to stay in ketterdam, and he takes the opportunity he'd been waiting for.
-warnings: maybe ooc kaz (i'm, still trying to figure out how to write him best)
Kaz Brekker, dirtyhands, bastard of the barrel, he had a sharp eye for details, for things that could be worth something or could be useful later on. That's how he raised himself to be in the barrel, be above anyone else before they can be above you. It was quite literally kill or be killed, he quickly realized that after Jordie's death.
He knew from there looking forward that he had to seek revenge, if not for himself, for Jordie, to silence his brother's voice ringing in the back of his head. When he rose up the ranks of the Barrel, closer to getting exactly where he needed to be, he had gained a name for himself (or many names) that gave him a new purpose of life. A kind of rebirth from Kaz Rietveld to Kaz Brekker. From the darkness rose a nightmare.
His gloves, really, were his only weakness, the only hint he had outwardly towards the past where he was forged. He'd heard the rumors, even fed into some to keep people's minds grasping for an answer they would never find. It hadn't at first occurred to him really that someone might reach past the gloves, the barriers he had set to keep out the water threatening to reach back in and drown him.
You had come along sometime before Inej by pure chance. You knew of Kaz Brekker, and needed his help. Something small that would hold a price you could repay easily, yet was still worth enough to get him to agree. He hadn't expected you to stick around even after the debt was repaid. He told himself it was because of Inej, who had recently been brought out of the Menagerie. He saw how compatibly you worked with one another on simpler jobs that didn't require a mess. Not a big one at least. He certainly hadn't expected your company to evolve over the next couple years.
Now, he sat at a table below the deck of the ship they were on, going back to Ketterdam from a job across Kerch. He busied himself with refolding maps and blueprints that were no longer needed, but he couldn't help from hearing the laughter coming from right above him on the deck. Your laughter, mixed with Jesper's. He shouldn't have been surprised, it was like you and Jesper shared the same brain when it came to making jokes. But that knowledge didn't seem to matter, because he knew exactly why you were laughing from the thud that echoed right after, cuing Nina and Wylan's laughter as well. You and Jesper were probably a mess of limbs on the deck right now, wrestling over something stupid and impractical like usual as Matthias tried to pry you apart despite his amusement that he tried to hide.
Kaz felt something stir inside him, a feeling he had become familiar with when he saw how tightly Nina would hug you or how easy it felt for Jesper to wrap an arm around your shoulder when walking. It made him wish he could get over whatever he felt against touch when he saw Wylan instinctively reach for your hand whenever something excited either of you, he wished he could take Matthias' place with a comforting hand on your shoulder after a bad job or take Inej's place smoothing bandages over wounds after a fight.
Kaz recalled the first time he had felt your touch without any fabric between his skin and yours. It was and unpleasant trip in his mind, to say the least, but it had to be done. You were the only one around that didn't feel like letting Kaz Brekker die that day. It was a light press of your knuckles as you tied off a stitch, but it was long enough to signal the panic waiting to be released. You had quickly stepped away, not wanting to make it worse, but you hadn't seen it coming, and you didn't know how to stop it.
The second time was close, he had held out his hand for the jewel you had collected on a job, his gloves resting on the desk beside his elbow. You had dropped it in his hand right before you touched him, but he still felt the air of your retracting hand, and the small bit of warmth that had radiated from it in the second it hovered over his own.
Since then, he had allowed you to help him with it. He told you it was only to avoid an encounter where his one weakness might be a compromised vulnerability. He couldn't risk that happening even though no one knew besides his crows. It started small, you would rest your hand on his desk, palm facing up. The rest was at his pace. It was slow process, progress did not come quickly or easily, as the mind is a powerful thing, and trauma's claws are sharp and hurt to pry from the victim.
You gave him the space and time he needed. On a day he could manage linking your pinkies, he wouldn't take his gloves off for another day. On days that weren't so much, he could try again the next day. Progress comes slow for anything, you should know. He did know, not only from experience, but your reminders repeating over and over in his head.
Inej's hand appeared over the map Kaz had been staring at, slowly pulling it towards where she was seated across from him. "You're missing the party up there." She chose not to comment on his blank stare before she had made her presence known.
"You could hardly call that a party. Maybe a group of maddening school children." Kaz picked up the next map unfazed, folding it according to all the previous creases it bent at. Inej allowed a near invisible smirk to pull at the corner of her lips as she folded her own map.
"Maybe you could excuse the heartrender in that group that saved us all from being blown to pieces." This time, Kaz looked up at the girl across from him, expression completely unreadable besides the annoyance clouding in his eyes that only a select few knew where to find. "The sunlight may do you good anyways. Maybe even someone else up there would find extra company pleasant." But Kaz didn't make a move to get up, and Inej didn't push it.
The two sat in silence, save for the loud conversations still coming from above deck. The maps had been folded and stored away until they neared the docks, and Inej watched as Kaz's fingers twitched slightly beneath his gloves. Your voice echoed over the others again, something about the flowers of Ketterdam. A joke, Inej knew. There were no flowers, at least none easy to come by.
But Kaz knew there was another meaning to your joke, he had heard it before during a job, back before even Jesper or Inej were around. He had asked you about it, and your response was simple, it's easy to make jokes of things that will never be.
Kaz couldn't understand why he remembered it, why such a small detail held such a big memory, like it was a secret kept between the two of you. Inej had left, and you had taken her place. Kaz didn't seem moved enough to greet you as you sunk into the chair.
"The flowers of Ketterdam?" You duck your head at his question, instead staring at the rough skin around your nails.
"Yes. I might grow some lilies at the club. Red ones." Kaz shook his head at that.
"There will be no flowers at my club." Kaz reaches for his cane that had been propped on the edge of the table, holding the crows head between his gloved hands.
"Is Nina not a flower then?" You grinned, looking up from your hands.
"Nina is far from a flower."
"That's not what Matthias thinks."
"I don't care what Matthias thinks about her. Though I'm unfortunately reminded of it every time he looks at her."
"What, the way you look at a new stack of kruge?"
"Have you simply come to pester me or do you actually need something?" Your eyes go back to your hands, shrugging your shoulders that were still visibly tense from when you had gotten on the ship when you had first left Ketterdam.
"Just letting you know we'll be back in a few minutes." The room fell into silence then, besides the light tapping of your heel against the wood beneath you as your leg bounced.
"The job went fine, why are you still acting like it's your first one?"
"Maybe because we're constantly putting our lives on the line for more money even though we just steal whatever we want on the daily." Your eyes were still trained on your hands, twisting your rings back and forth around your fingers.
Kaz knew you were right, but he couldn't just stop. That was how he made his income, that was how he got to where he was, and ultimately, it would be how he destroyed Pekka Rollins. He didn't want to risk the lives of his crows, but honestly, they were probably safer where they were now than wandering the wrong side of Ketterdam homeless, stuck under contract with the Menagerie, or thrown in a prison cell awaiting death.
"This can't be how we live the rest of our lives." You finally look up from the glimmering rings adorning your fingers, meeting Kaz's gaze which had also been fixated on your rings.
"It won't. Think of it like a phase in a game, long but never lasts." He stands from the chair across the table from you and instead sits in the one next to you. "You'll all leave this place eventually, and with that, you'll be leaving this life behind."
"What about you?"
"I'll always be here." A frown settles across your face, it sounded horrible that he'd always be stuck in Ketterdam, even though you knew he could go anywhere if he wanted.
"Then I will too." You disliked Ketterdam just as much as your friends above deck, but also like them, like Kaz, a part of it felt like home now. The Slat, the Crow Club, where you'd spent days and nights talking and laughing when jobs weren't lurking around your schedules. You weren't alone like you were when you first arrived in Ketterdam. You'd all found a small, broken family in each other.
"You shouldn't." You couldn't have expected those to be the words that left Kaz's lips. Something else was happening, gears were turning in a multitude of directions in his mind. In fact, you were so focused on that, you had missed how carefully he'd slid off his gloves.
"Do you not want me to stay?" Your voice had dropped to a whisper, scared of the answer. You weren't sure what Kaz wanted exactly, no one ever was. But rather than a verbal response, you were shocked at the sudden feel of a hand taking yours. Looking down was when you noticed Kaz's gloves resting on his knee, the skin of his hand uncovered and touching yours.
He didn't say anything, about holding your hand or a response to your question, but the grip of his hand on yours was reassuring to you, and it answered any possible question you could think to ask in the moment. He did want you to stay with him, but he wanted better for you. Not the dim streets of a city that would kill before it would love.
Kaz had found that he surprised himself with how easy it felt to have your hand in his once he had pushed the waters down and the resurfacing memories back. Carefully, he ran his thumb down your palm, resting at the pulse point of your wrist. You watched him with gentle eyes as he put the slightest amount of pressure there, feeling your pulse beat lightly against his thumb. He left it there for a moment, until it began to feel like too much. You noticed and lightly pulled your hand away before the panic could set in.
"You don't have to stay." He mutters, pulling his worn gloves back on, refusing to meet your light gaze.
"I want to." Your response calls his eyes back to your own, and he saw the feeling you held in them. "I'll use my flower money to buy you some new gloves. Or maybe a hat."
Kaz knew he still had a long road of work ahead of him if he wanted to touch you properly, without gloves or multiple layers of fabric between you. But he knew you were patient with him, and he trusted you would stick to your word of staying.
"We're home children, you owe me waffles!" Nina's voice calls down the stairs, followed by the echo of footsteps moving off the deck. Giving Kaz a small smile, you stand from your chair and head towards the stairs that would lead above deck.
"I'll wait for you up there."
───☆───
The next morning, you woke up a bit later than normal. Though you'd had a reason too, the boat ride was not the most relaxing thing after the job you'd all performed the previous two days. Stretching out your arms, something brightly colored caught your eye from the night stand beside your pillow. With a smile, you reach for the object resting neatly in the center. The floral scent pleasantly stung your senses as you observed the bouquet of red lilies that had been placed on your nightstand, along with a note that instructed your presence at seven bells at the corner restaurant the crows had been meeting at for dinner lately.
Could you do one where reader is a Pureblood Hufflepuff she bff with Sirus black lily Evan and the other maunders( remus james and peter anyway she in a relationship with remus Lupin any plot is fine am not to picky :)
sunflower and sparrow, remus lupin
synopsis: you're given a note from remus, and something that means a lot more than you think
warnings: none (i don't think), maybe grammar/spelling errors though
peter pettigrew ran as quickly as his feet could carry him, weaving between waves of other students crowding the staircases he needed to take. it was urgent, that's what sirius had said when he sent the blonde off in a rush. straight to the hufflepuff common room, ask for the ghost. sirius' instructions had been exactly that, and in the seconds that followed, a laugh emitted from james who was hovered over lily in the arm chair of their own common room.
now that peter really thought about it, it was stupid, and he had no idea why he even bothered. maybe it was the hope he'd see a certain blonde on the way there. maybe it was to see his friend, but it was mostly stupid. at the portrait acting as a door, peter saw who he assumed to be the ghost sirius spoke of, and he let out a disbelieving sigh at the wide grin and bubbly laugh of emmeline vance as she took the slip of parchment from the panting boy's hand. "thanks, love." she calls back to him, a playful wink going over her shoulder. peter left the corridor annoyed, planning how to make sirius' pay him back for the trouble he'd gone to for no reward.
"good morning, lovely." emmeline's hair brushes over your face as she flops onto your bed beside you. "you were reading a different book last night when i left."
"i finished it, and i've been wanting to start this one for a while." you reply, resting your cheek on the crown of emmeline's head which rested on your shoulder.
"the one sirius gave you?" she felt you nod your head, and decided to give you the note peter so graciously delivered mere minutes prior to her visit with you. "our dear peter was in a rush to get this to you. thought i'd hand deliver it." as soon as the paper was in your grasp, the black haired girl sprung herself off the bed and headed for the door. "i'll see you later!"
you set your book down on the small stand beside your bed and unfold the messy parchment, eyes immediately reading the note scribbled in fine cursive.
my sunflower,
out seventh year will be over in two months already, i hope you've begun studying for your exams. though i know you haven't, and i'll be meeting you in the library after classes tomorrow to fix that. can't have you failing your final year without the rest of us. come meet me by the lake when you get this, and bring your ink.
with love, your sparrow
you had given remus the name sparrow your fifth year, after quite a few shifts in personality and behavior. you'd though the symbolism suited him well, and he didn't feel like arguing your points anymore. then just last year, he in return gave you the name sunflower. his reasoning? the first time he'd told you he loved you, he'd given you a sunflower, and a torn out page from a book that said sparrows preferred sunflowers.
but now you were on your way to the lake, your pot of ink tucked into the pocket of your jacket. it was an odd request, one that occupied your thoughts until you saw remus waiting for you, back leaning against the trunk of a tree overlooking the water.
"hi." remus stands from his spot on the ground to meet you as you drew nearer to the tree.
"hi." you smile, reaching to take his outstretched hand. "what did you need my ink for?"
"i ran out." he replies simply, a grin crossing his features that you knew all too well.
"well why do you need it now? i highly doubt you brought me out here to watch you do homework." remus laughs, straightening out the blanket on the ground so you had somewhere to sit before moving beside you.
"it's for this." reaching behind him, he retrieves a bag with a book inside. it was the collector's edition of your favorite book, one you'd told remus about many times since he'd known you. he also knew you'd been saving up for it as there were few left in sale.
"remus-"
"don't lecture me or anything, just take it and trust that i know what i'm doing."
"thank you so much." remus laughs with you as your arms fling around his neck, pulling him into a death grip hug. "i love it." remus takes a minute to observe the wide smile you wore as you flip through the pages, and he found himself completely awed by you. "oh, what did you need the ink for?"
"here." remus holds his hands out for the ink and sets the book between the two of you, only the cover of the book open. you watch as he carefully adds a small paper to the back of it and began drawing something that you couldn't quite see. then, when he pulled his hand away you saw a bird resting on top of a flower. looking closer, you realized it was a sparrow perched on the petal of a sunflower. "you've always kept me from falling, even when i thought i would. i don't think you'll ever quite understand just how much you mean to me, but i want you to know."
"i understand. you're everything to me too." remus smiles, nothing but love in his eyes as he looks at you. "and the drawing is beautiful. i'll always keep it, just like i'll always have you."
jesper x reader. Reader (gn/you) shows interest on a book, jesper has no money because he spent it all in gambling and fancy clothes, so he steals it to see his lover happy <3
luck, jesper fahey
-synopsis: jesper considers you his luck, so when you're on a trip to see your family, he scrounges the last of it he has without you there to surprise you with the book you've been wanting.
-warnings: theft, light injuries, i went a little overboard on the lead up (sorry), but i hope you like it anyways!
jesper knew the look in your eye the second the window of the bookshop came closer into view. tightening his grip on your hand, he watched as you eyed a particular book in the window display. he remembered the title vaguely, probably from when you mentioned wanting to read it a couple weeks ago. but, to his luck, you kept walking. he would've hated having to lead you away unwillingly since neither of you had the time or money to spare.
in typical jesper fashion, he had already made the two of you late to the slat, and jesper could practically feel kaz's words building in his throat down the road at this very moment. yet he only received a frightening glare before your hand left the warmth of his own to follow inej down the hall, leaving jesper to follow kaz upstairs. as soon as the door to the office had shut, jesper whirled around to face the other boy in the room, an unfamiliar question on the tip of his tongue.
"i need-"
"no." kaz had seen the question coming from a mile away, and he knew jesper knew what the answer would be. but jesper hardly asked, so it didn't stop the tall boy from trying anyways.
"but it's for-"
"i know."
"so can you-"
"jesper." kaz's eyes looked like they went right through jesper's soul in that moment, and the boy's lips snapped shut, a frown sealing them together. "you'd just gamble away any money i gave you, despite what you want to use it for right this second." jesper let out a deep sigh, sinking into the worn chair across from kaz's desk. numerous papers were scattered across the surface, numbers and illegible writing scrawled across the pages, save for a few stacked in the corner that jesper immediately knew kaz made you do, based on the writing being less cursive and larger in size than that of kaz's writing.
"so, what's the court order of the day?" jesper leans back, folding his arms behind his head, his left leg resting on the knee of his right. kaz didn't spare him a glance as he began digging through a drawer in his desk, his words going right over jesper's head as the sharpshooter's mind began wandering.
───☆───
the current job the crows were on had gone awry quickly, nina accidently giving the signal too early causing wylan's bomb to go off too early as well. it had become pure chaos in the flash of a lightning bolt. fortunately, inej fought quicky and you and matthias worked quicker. the three of you run for the designated meet up spot, but a glint of light made you falter. wylan was crouched behind a table in the room to your left, two guards on the opposite wall waiting to fire. matthias urged inej to go on and make sure the other's got out safely as well.
you look back at the fjerdan, receiving a nod as his hold tightened around the knob of the door, swinging it open as you moved into the room, firing shots at the guards to buy wylan enough time to get out unscathed. you, however, weren't so fortunate, a bullet grazing your arm in the fire. but both guards were on the ground now, leaving you, matthias, and wylan an opening to follow inej's path where, hopefully, the other crows were already waiting for you.
matthias had torn a piece of fabric from a curtain you passed, and you used it to wrap around the wound on your arm until you were back at the slat and could properly dress and disinfect it. wylan began making conversation with you once the building was out of sight, trying to distract you from the stinging pain that came with the pressure you were holding on your arm. you had been calm about the whole thing, something jesper was not when he saw your injury.
“what is that? what happened? are you okay? how bad does it hurt?” the words came spewing from his mouth as he ran forwards to meet you. his eyes quickly begin scanning you for any other visible injuries, letting out a relieved sigh when he saw none.
“i’ll be fine, it’s just a graze. nothing serious.” jesper frowns at that, but chooses not to say anything as he wraps an arm around your shoulders, being careful to keep his hand away from the injury.
once you were all back at the slat, kaz and inej parted from the rest of you gathered in nina’s room. she began healing your arm to the best of her abilities, which, luckily was a fairly quick fix for the heartrender. matthias busied himself with fetching whatever nina needed to help you while wylan sat beside you, apologizing softly. jesper couldn’t hear much of what he said, just saw you softly kissing the boy’s temple and telling him not to worry. it brought wylan’s smile back, but his eyes didn’t reflect it. not until you whispered something in his ear and he shot up from his spot, bolting out the door. matthias had to step to the side to avoid the smaller boy crashing into him and the basket of healing supplies in his arms.
“what was that about?” jesper questioned, sitting in the spot wylan had just vacated.
“i sent him to ask kaz how much money we could get off the books i've already read.” you reply, letting out a small wince at the pressure of nina's hand on your wound.
"for what?"
"that new one i saw in the window the other day. i've been hearing about it around town but no one's read it all the way through to sell it again. not yet at least, and i don't have enough now to buy new."
nina stood once she was finished attending to your wound, wiping her hands on a towel matthias had brought her. “no more fighting until you’re completely healed. that includes your little wrestling matches you all think i don’t know about.” matthias looks at you, you at jesper, and jesper at nina with a slack jaw.
“none? not a single one?” nina rolls her eyes, suppressing the smile trying to fight its way to her face.
“not one, unless you want that one’s arm completely ripped open.” she responds, a finger waving in your direction.
"well, certainly can't have that now, can we?" jesper jokes, giving you a quick wink over his shoulder.
"yeah, how could you style your hair on the go without me holding up your mirror?" matthias lets out a small laugh at your words while jesper fully turns to you offended. really offended this time.
"just because of one arm having a boo-boo?"
"yes, dummy." you scoff despite your amused smile. "you take too long and one arm gets tired after a while." this only fuels matthias' laughter and jesper's offence.
"okay, that's quite rude. i don't take that long-"
"you do." nina chimes in, nodding her head in agreeance with you. "i'm surprised her arms haven't fallen off yet under the weight of that mirror. it's excessive."
"that's it. after all i've done for you, and this is how you repay me?" jesper clutches a hand to his heart, eyes darting between you, nina, and a red-faced matthias.
"i was only gone for three minutes, what have you all done?" the four of you turn to the door where wylan stood, a confused pout on his face as he searched each of your faces for anything that could tell him what he had just walked into.
"ah, wylan van sunshine, welcome back!"
───☆───
jesper relied a lot on luck. on jobs, in gambling dens, even when meeting with kaz on particular days. he had always run out at the end of the day, but coming home to you was what he believed recharged his luck for the next day.
today, however, seemed to be the day jesper fahey's luck ran out. he lost a horrible bout at the tables earlier in the day, dropped his hat in the dirt twice because of the wind, and now, a simple job had turned disastrous. to make it even worse, you weren't at the slat, you weren't there for jesper to come back to.
he knew he shouldn't have been so bitter about your lack of presence, you were just visiting your family after all. but that didn't stop the frown that etched itself onto jesper's face as he re-entered the slat and was met with only matthias, nina, and kaz's shut office.
on any usual day, nina would have poked fun at jesper's worn out look after a rough day, but the lack of good luck had hit her as well, and matthias didn't look any better to do the teasing for her. jesper gave them a small nod of acknowledgement and climbed the stairs to your room, falling face first into your pillow. jesper missed you badly, he didn't remember the last time the two of you had been apart for so long, and the lack of you was getting to him, making him wish he had held you just a little tighter the night before you left.
reaching a hand out to toss his hat onto the small table beside your bed, a tiny ripped paper fell to the floor from the wind of his hat falling to the surface. with a small huff of annoyance, he rolled to the end of your bed, blindly reaching for the paper on the floor. once the crinkled item touched his fingertips, he picked it up, ready to set it back in it's place, but curiosity got the better of him.
rubbing a hand over his tired eyes, he could make out the words of your handwriting scrawled unevenly in a line across the paper. a couple practical items you needed, including a new roll of thread you planned to fix a hole in one of your jackets with. you had used the last of your old one teaching jesper how to stitch holes in his own clothes by himself. that lesson had only ended in you having to bandage his fingers, as he kept poking the needle through the fabric too harshly, which resulted in him pricking himself in the finger. but beneath that was a familiar name, next to a familiar book title. the one you had seen in the bookshop and the one he kept overhearing you talk to inej and wylan about.
feeling a new sense of energy, jesper stood from your bed and pocketed the list, just in case. he went back to his own room down the hall and searched for any spare money that might have fallen out of his coat or been hidden by himself so he didn't spend it. unfortunately, he came up empty handed and with a deep frown. he really wanted to surprise you with that book when you returned, and he could already imagine the look of pure happiness on your face when he would hand it to you, but he couldn't do that without any money to get it for you in the first place.
"oh, who am i kidding, i'm a crow." jesper mutters to himself, flipping his hat back onto his head. making his way back towards the bookshop, jesper didn't even have an inkling of a plan on how to steal the book. he didn't have any proper distractions and it was getting late so there wouldn't be many people to cover him from view of the worker. that didn't stop him from pushing the shop door open and making a beeline for the table that held the book though.
it didn't take long to find, it wasn't a small book, but it wasn't as long as some of the others jesper had seen you read. you'd have it done in a day if he didn't let anyone interrupt you. for as little as jesper read, he had to admit it looked nicer than the ones you already owned. granted you got your second hand and for less than half of the original price. this one was brand new, it's spotless navy blue cover with embroidered gold wording would starkly contrast the others on your shelf, but the price didn't deter jesper one bit. even though it wouldn't have mattered anyways.
looking around, it seemed jesper's luck had returned, because when he turned to see who might catch him stuffing the book into his jacket, no one was there. so with the added weight to the inside pocket of jesper's coat, he left the store and wandered the streets back home, stopping to look at a rack of clothing on the way.
───☆───
it had taken you two more days to arrive home, and jesper had never been more thrilled to step foot on the docks of 5th harbor. wrapping you tightly in his arms, he began telling you how much he missed you and that he never wanted you to leave him again, or to at least bring him with you next time. you had laughed at that, but agreed anyways which lit jesper's face up in a bright smile.
"good, now come on. i have something for you." jesper could barely contain his excitement as he dragged you to his room by your hand, which he dropped only for a minute to dig through a drawer in the corner. "here, close your eyes."
"jesper, i think i might fall asleep if i close my eyes, i'm exhausted."
"fine." jesper sighs, holding out the book to you. gently taking it from his grasp, you couldn't stop the excitement shown on your face as you read the cover.
"saints, jesper, this is new!" you look up at him from the book, eyes widened in surprise. "how?"
"maybe it's best you don't know." jesper grins, and you respond with a roll of your eyes, though he doesn't care because the smile gracing your face was the best thing he had ever seen. i've never had more luck in my life, he thinks to himself, falling onto his bed beside you as you open the book and begin to read the pages to him until your exhaustion from the trip really does set in. jesper takes the book from your hands and sets it down before wrapping his arms around you. "you had fun with your family, right?"
"mhm, you'd have loved it."
"well, i love you more than whatever you did that whole week without me." jesper smiles at the sleepy laugh you give him before he feels a kiss pressed to his cheek.
"i love you too, jes. way more than what i did on that trip."
-tsireya, kiri, and neteyam know everything about everyone in school because of their daily gossip sessions
-lo'ak, ao'nung, and rotxo always try to listen in but never get anything
-they wonder if it's about them
-it usually is
-sometimes tuk joins them about the things happening in her elementary school
-neteyam develops a little fear of elementary school children from this
-kiri has a collection of converse and beanies in her closet, literally owns every color available
-rotxo tutors kids in his history class, yet has the closets teacher-student relationship with his math teacher
-kiri and tsireya skip classes they don't like to hang out in the bathroom, yet still get all their work done
-ao'nung and neteyam take all ap/honors classes, rotxo has a healthy balance
-jake owns a minivan that ronal teases neytiri for
-friday night cookouts over summer, a tradition started by tonowari and jake
-game nights are horrible for neytiri and kiri (they both hate sports and huge commotion), the boys will nonstop argue over teams and which game they should watch
-tsireya lives for superbowl halftime shows
-she also sold friendship bracelets in 3rd grade and made a ton of money
-probably taught tuk how to operate an elementary school business
-lo'ak makes playlists for his dates with tsireya but keeps them all private
-asks neteyam for suggestions sometimes
-ao'nung and neteyam constantly check homework answers with each other while lo'ak just tries to copy them (even though he is pretty strong in some subjects)
-rotxo and kiri go to protests in the area together, tsireya and neteyam sometimes tag along
-ao'nung drives tsireya and kiri to the mall some weekends before he goes to play basketball with rotxo
-neytiri got kiri and neteyam hooked on thrift stores
-starting off strong, tuk running an underground operation at school (probably boxed raisins or something like that) and makes a good deal of money for being in elementary
-kiri is big on mitski and lana del rey and has a plant covered room
-you know those fake vine curtains people put on their walls? she has them, except they're real
-everyone questions how, her answer every time? magic
-ao'nung and lo'ak accidentally mixed up their vapes once (they looked exactly the same) and had absolute meltdowns when they found out
-neteyam listens to the weeknd
-neteyam and ao'nung are the only ones who got their liscense, they drive everyone everywhere
-hate to say it, but lo'ak and tsireya are the annoying pda couple in the hallway
-ao'nung had barreled through the hallway just to walk between the two while they hold hands (on more that one occasion)
-educationally, neteyam and roxto are the best in the literary/historical branches
-ao'nung, tsireya, and lo'ak are better mathematically/scientifically
-kiri is best at literature/science with a burning hatred for math even though she's good at it
-lo'ak once asked for jake's help with homework in 3rd grade, no sully child ever asked him for help again
-neteyam makes quizlets for everything
-the group religiously uses those for answers the day before tests
-they were talking about it at lunch one day and neteyam found out
-he started putting the wrong answers on there for fun
-correspondingly, everyone's grades dropped on the next test
-tsireya and roxto help each other on homework because they're good at opposite subjects
-ao'nung is the gym teacher's favorite, and it's blatantly clear
-(a direct quote) "everyone's running laps today! not you ao'nung, you twisted your ankle last friday"
-tuk convinces neteyam to look up an online lesson plan for her grade level
-the reason for this? she doesn't feel like paying attention sometimes and needs something to go off of when her parents ask what she learned about
sandy hair, tsireya
-synopsis: your best friend meets you at your spot the same way she does every night. the only difference is that this time, you leave being more than friends.
-warnings: light mentions of jealous reader, fluff, smiley reya
it had been a few weeks since the family of forest na'vi had arrived with the metkayina clan and stolen your best friend away from you. tsireya was such a sweet girl, always helping when asked, and unfortunately for you, had no capacity within herself to be selfish, even just for a day to give herself a break and spend time with you like she normally did before they sully's arrival.
you attended to all your daily responsibilities as normal, but now it was all dull without the laughs shared with your best friend. well, best friend that you had a massive crush on, but you were still trying to figure out the best approach. you had no doubt that your feelings were reciprocated, you saw the way tsireya looked at you compared to all your other friends. but what had scared you as of late was that she might move on to one of the sully boys who couldn't seem to tear his eyes away from her. it annoyed you to no end, but you couldn't blame him, she was beautiful, with a personality to match. not to mention that she was not tied to you in any way besides being your closest friend.
it had been nearing eclipse as you wandered the beach, taking the all-too familiar route to a hidden waterfall that you and tsireya had claimed as your spot. the two of you had met there every night for years, in fact, you couldn't remember a time either of you had skipped those sacred meetings.
you must have appeared a bit later, or tsireya was early because as you heard the cascading water hit the rocks below, you could see the outline of tsireya's form from the dimming light in the sky.
"you are here!" tsireya turns, a wide smile on her face to match yours as you took your place on a rock beside her.
"of course. i always am." tsireya leans her head on your knee, as the rock you were on provided more height that hers. "what's on your mind, reya?"
"i feel as though i have not seen you." the girl sighs, leaning into your touch as you run a hand through her hair. "i miss you."
"i bet i miss you more." you smile, looking down into tsireya's wide gaze. the reflection of the stars brightly shining in her eyes makes you pause for a moment.
"i do not think that is possible."
"oh really?" somehow, tsireya's smile grows wider at the mischievous glint in your eyes. she no longer leans on your leg as she sits up on the rock beneath her, prepared to take off running. you stay still for a moment, watching her movements until she runs away, leaving you to chase after her.
your laughter echoes through the formation of rocks separating the two of you from your village as your feet carry you across the sand of the beach. you could easily catch up to tsireya if you wanted, but you instead settle for following her, just for now. as desperately as you longed to live in this moment forever, you knew it would not last, so you enjoyed the chase.
tsireya's steps slow eventually, still laughing to the point of her stomach muscles tensing uncomfortably as you tackle her to the sand. however, as you do not move from you place hovering over her, tsireya's laughter dies down, and she becomes nervous at the proximity. you notice as she traces a line with her eyes from the inner corners of your eyes, down the center of your nose to the arch of your lips, and you wonder if now would be a good time to finally tell her how deeply you cared for her, how you hated the time spent away from her that you've lately suffered through.
your choice is made for you though, when tsireya's soft hands gently nudge at your shoulders, signaling for you to move off of her. rolling to the side, you help tsireya sit up from the sand, a small grin forming at the corners of your mouth at the many grains of sand stuck in her long hair. "what?" she frowns, tucking her legs beneath her as she looks at you.
"you have sand all over your hair, syulang." tsireya quickly looks away from you, unsure if it was because of the gentle look you gave her, embarrassment of the mess in her hair, or the fluttery feeling taking over her stomach at the nickname you had called her.
it was not new, you had called her that before, but only rarely. tsireya hadn't heard you call her that since she realized her feelings towards you, and hearing it with a new light made her smile so widely that her cheeks began aching. she did not look back at you, but did not move or protest as you began combing your fingers through her hair, brushing the sand out of her curls.
even after all the sand had been brushed away, you couldn't help but admire the way the starlight seemed to make her glow, white spots dancing across her skin so beautifully, you couldn't find it in yourself to look anywhere but at her. "you're so lovely, reya."
finally, the girl looks at you again, her eyes wide at the sudden words. "hmm?"
"you're always so kind, sometimes i don't understand how someone could be so pure hearted." you begin speaking, before you realize. but you continue, if this all went wrong, you could regret it later. sleep it off and apologize in the morning. "i never understood how you became friends with me, of all the others in the village. you are way too good to be my friend, too good for me." your voice lowers at the end of your sentence, nerves finally catching up to you with what you were about to say, but like always, tsireya is patient with you, not rushing the pause you took to gather your thoughts, though internally she was nearly as nervous as you. "that's why sometimes i wish i didn't like you the way i do, because i'll never be good enough for someone like you. you deserve way more than i could ever have to offer."
"stop." you look at tsireya with wide eyes, fearful you had said something wrong, that she would be upset that you liked her as more than what you were. "you should not speak so lowly of yourself. if i had thought even for a moment that you were not enough for me, we would not be here. if you were less than what i deserved, then why would i care so deeply for you, more than i would any other friend?" unknowingly, tears had begun welling in both your eyes as tsireya spoke her next words softly, to be kept just between the two of you, sacred and reserves only for your ears. "i see you."
"i see you, reya." across from you, tsireya's smile glowed brighter than all the stars in the sky, and in that moment, you swore you could never live a day without her, unsure of how you ever did before you met her. distracting you from your thoughts, tsireya presses a small kiss to your cheek, only a small distance from the corner of your mouth. "missed." you whisper, your grin returning at the small action. your hands find tsireya's as she this time gently kisses your lips, sighing happily as your fingers intertwine with her own. as her lips move with yours, you both feel a rushing feeling that everything that led to this moment was long awaited, and neither of you would trade this for anything. "take off the lessons tomorrow, yeah? stay with me." you ask, looking into the big blue eyes of the girl you had grown to love.
"just this once." as promised, tsireya snuck away with you the next morning, and many mornings after. tonowari and ronal had begun to question why their daughter left the sully children to their own time so early, but decided it was not worth questioning as any time they asked, the only received a wide, un-telling smile from the girl, and they knew the true reason would come out with time.
Okay but what would being roomates with the nevermore girlies be like?
being roommates with the nevermore girls
-wednesday: keeps her things on her side of the room and asks that you do the same. usually it's only one of you in the dorm at a time, but on the days you are both there, it's either quiet or very light talking. she definitely does mind if you bring someone over and asks that you tell her before hand.
-enid: you guys don't even know who's stuff is whos by the second week. unlike with wednesday, you and enid share your space as it is equally both of your room. she'll convince you to have weekly selfcare days with her and sometimes invite your other friends over.
-yoko: posters everywhere and clashing colors. if one of you comes back with more decorations for your room and can't find somewhere to put it, you'll take down something of the others. many times, you've come back to find your nightstand littered with yoko's new trinkets. but, every time one of you goes shopping, you'll ask if the other needs something. since being roommates with her, you've both become very close.
-bianca: in a way, being roommates with bianca is like a cross between wednesday and enid. while you both mostly stick to your respective sides of the room, neither of you are opposed to hanging out with each other. shopping together in jericho is a must, always asking for each others opinions. she's also great to work with if you need help with your homework.
-divina: you didn't really acknowledge each other at first, but as time went on, you both became friends and you'd find yourselves sharing rooms even over summer when one would come to visit the other. you respect each other's space if needed but it would never surprise you to come back to your dorm and find divina asleep in your bed or vice versa.
-wednesday: quick but sweet, usually reserved for when you're in private. sometimes lets her lips linger on your a second longer on special occasions
-enid: soft and sweet, loves kissing you because it reminds her you're there forever
-tyler: slow and intentional, he loves feeling like he has all the time in the world to spend with you and wants you to feel that way too
-xavier: close and quick, always trying to be as close as possible in a rush, even though you've both got time
-yoko: breathtaking, until you're both gasping for air because yeah, she gets to do that when no one else can and she thrives off that fact
-bianca: spontaneous, whenever she feels like it and it'll be different every time. you'll pull away gasping for air or chasing her lips as she pulls back
-ajax: slow and soft, doesn't like rushing but needs to put feelings into actions rather than words
-divina: reassuring, if you feel bad, her kisses make it instantly better, or if you already feel good, you'll feel even better
-kent: drawn out and messy, literally does not care about feeling like anything has to be perfect or like he needs to take his time because he knows you
How would the Wednesday chacters act if their partners were having a bad day
wednesday characters comforting you after a bad day
(i ran out of ideas so i couldn't write for everyone, i'm so sorry 😭)
-wednesday: she wouldn't notice super early on but she would pick up on little things that weren't something you normally did. she would take you to her dorm after classes and ask if something had happened to make you have a bad day. if it was because of someone, she'd tell you that she will find and threaten whoever did it. she'll let you lay on her bed while she reads to you and when you feel better, she'll leave you with a small kiss to your cheek.
-enid: spends a lot of time with you so she knows nearly the exact second your day starts becoming a bad one. she'll check on you throughout the day and immediately goes to find you after classes to see if you had gotten worse or better. if it got better, she'd be happy and ask you to help her repaint her nails. if it got worse, she'd give you the most comforting hug and ask if you want to talk about it. she won't leave you until you fell better, even if it's three in the morning and you only feel the slightest bit better.
-xavier: he would notice early on in the day, so any classes you have together, he'll sit with you and make sure no one bothers you and after classes you don't have together, he'll give you little pictures he drew instead of taking notes. if you still felt bad after school, he'd take you to his art shed and let you paint on one of his blank canvases. if you aren't really a painter, he'd offer to help you or just let you mess around as long as nothing gets messed up.
-tyler: he would bring you snacks and let you pick something to watch for as long as you want. he'll stay up with you all night if that's what you need. he also always conveniently has a little handmade gift for you. it ranges from pieces of jewelry to pop-up cards. there's always so much though put into those too that he makes it hard to feel bad for too long, no matter how bad the day got.
-divina: she would let you rant to her for hours about anything and everything that went wrong. she'd probably try asking you if you remember anything good that happened and then help you try to focus on that instead of the negatives.
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